Adoption journey

[puppymom32]

Hi Everyone,
Just checking in. I have had no news lately so I have been reading, but not posting.

Yay for the kids coming home early

Lola-Congrats on wrapping up the paperwork

PuppyMom--You look so much like my childhood best friend, I tried to enlarge the picture to get a better look at you You did not grow up in Northern Indiana by chance?

AFM--Very frustrated with my private agency. They are taking so long to get back to me with every little thing. I went ahead and made my own website, I was so tired of waiting on them. I am sure one day we will "go live". The good news is that our local social worker keeps passing along leads so we are being shown to some potential birth mothers.

Sorry been off for a while. Nope born and raised in Cincinnati. Pretty close though right. I guess i have a twin running around LOL Sorry things are going slow hun it will be worth it in the end.

 

[puppymom32]

Hope everyone is well. Love reading the stories of all the progress. DH and I have been discussing adopting another child. We may wait a year or so to start the process but so glad we are thinking about it. Even if it doesn't work out so glad and blessed to have my little one.

 

[dreamofabean]

Hi all,
Hope everyone is well!
I had my medical today, one more hurdle completed! Dh has his booked for Friday. Our gp was lovely, told me what a wonderful thing he thinks adoption is thought that was nice, although I felt like adding... Why don't you do it then?

 

[Loski83]

Well done dream another part done. Sorry not been on much had to sort crbs out today cause they have ran out and we need them for court. All done now hopefully but sure there will be something else that crops up.

 

[LolaM]

paperwork done. now we wait

 

[Lolly1985]

Well done dream! I often think the same when people tell me how wonderful adoption is, how amazing we are blah blah but of course just smile and thank them!! You really are motoring now

 

[Lolly1985]

Well done dream! I often think the same when people tell me how wonderful adoption is, how amazing we are blah blah but of course just smile and thank them!! You really are motoring now

 

[drudai]

Hi ladies.

Through my crummy week, coming over to this forum, I decided to read some journals and got hooked on this one.

It took me 3 days but I managed to catch up on everything. It's crazy to see the first posts timestamps and see how far everyone has progressed.

I just wanted to say hi and, as dream's dr would agree with me, I think you're all wonderful.

I remember as a kid, we had my cousin living with us from foster care, as my mother wanted to adopt her. Unfortunately with her metal conditions, she had to go back, but I understand how hard it was for everyone involved.

Lolly, I hope everything is going well for you.

Lola, good luck. You remind me of one of my coworkers. He and his wife have been TTC for 8 years after fighting her cancer and have now moved on to adoption.

Loski, I hope your little girl is all yours soon. Formalities are such a headache.

And to everyone else I hope to keep reading about your successes. Thank you for all your inspiration.

 

[Lolly1985]

Thank you very much for your post, it is very lovely of you to wish us all well in our quest to be mummies. I hope all is well with you and baby. Glad you enjoyed reading our stories

 

[LolaM]

My sw emailed us today. She has the paperwork and now has 45 days to file which is April 10th! Man this takes a long time. Babies all around me, im glad we are moving along because I cant take much more of THAT!

 

[Loski83]

Hi everyone hope you are all ok. Thankyou drudai for reading and supporting and hope your pregnancy is going well. Still no date just sometime in April still think something will go wrong so fingers crossed that it doesn't.

 

[Lolly1985]

Hi all, how is everyone?

Loski, I am sure that nothing will go wrong, just hope you get some news soon. Bubba will be all yours forever, they all know that she was meant to be in your family

Lola, hope the timne flies. We all know the waiting is hard!

Thought I would update you after our 8th session today... So we finished off our matching considerations and SW also clarified a couple of previous quieries she had encountered when starting to write our PAR. It was a relatively short session compared to others as we are almost there!! One more session left booked in for 4th April, and between now and then she will be visiting our referees and writing our PAR (she booked a few days out in her diary in front of us so that she can get on with the report, nice to know it is important to her).

We also had the 1 or 2 debate. She feels we are young, have experience, the facilities and support network for 2 but is happy with our reasons behind our decision for 1 child at this time. She made us aware that we are likely to wait longer but while hard we accept that we would always wait for the right match. We also completed our budget planner and she is happy with our calculations and ability to afford to raise a child comfortably.

She thinks we are on for May panel which will be 16th, BUT this is no means set in stone and a lot is hinged on getting one of our referees interviewed who lives 400 miles away! They have to go through the county council there and pay one of their SW to do it. Hope that they pull their finger out!! Fingers crossed!!

Love to you all, Lolly

 

[dreamofabean]

Aww loski I'm Sure it'll all be fine!
All sounds good lolly! How exciting!!! Xxx

 

[Lyns]

Hey guys.....sorry for not be around much!! Life has been pleasurably busy! Suffice to say our little man is settling so incredibly well and we are so very happy!!

In a little over one week, we have practically potty trained him....he has all but dropped his daytime nap and is sleeping longer at night instead, has learnt to count to 20 in english (could count to 5, but sometimes missed 3 when with fc) and 10 in welsh! Bless him! He is so happy....cuddly and is visibly thriving!

As we've got to know him more, sadly we have become incredibly angry at what we consider to have been shocking practise by the fc. When i tell you that at practically 3 years old and a good size for it, she had him in 18 month old clothes, shoes 1.5 sizes too small......and he never really ate much that didn't come out of a tin. Staple diet seems to have been 'Morrisons own' beans and sausages or spaghetti hoops......with a Mr Kipling cake for pud

Its been a pleasurable week cooking fresh meals (his favourite new word is 'deeeeeliscious'!!) baking, and clothes shopping. Oh and he had no toys...literally nothing of his own, just a few 'shared' cars with foster siblings. Suffice to say....he has loads now and is spoilt rotten!!

I know we are supposed to change things slowly, but no way could i leave him in those clothes, or on a diet such as that....and the rest is pretty much led by him! He has regressed slightly in his style of play....he is currently loving the cookie jar shape sorter!

Being here...now, the long wait (2 years since application) the invasive questioning (bank statements, wanting know or contact every employer we've seemingly ever had, social services even decide to interview DH's ex-wife of 10 years ago - no kids involved) amd the frustration are worth every single second, but the few words of advice i would give you....is follow your heart, tell the sw's whatever they want to hear and don't give up!!

 

[drudai]

I started tearing up with joy reading your post Lyns.

So glad your little boy is home. Spoil him rotten.

 

[LolaM]

I am mad at the WORLD today! 2, yes 2 stories of abandoned babies--one made it and one didnt--breaks my little heart. What is WROOONG with people???

 

[drudai]

Oh Lola, that's awful to hear. People are amazingly blinded by fear sometimes, makes me wonder how they made it through a pregnancy without being "at risk" psychologically.

Lolly, yay yay yay. May is so close in relativity. I'm sure everything will be fine. You're the perfect cookie cutter example of who I would think adoption agencies eat up like candy. No doubt in my mind that your panel will be a unanimous yes.

I hope you ladies have a wonderful weekend.

 

[zero7]

Hi all

Just trying to catch up with everyones news!

Dream - Well done on completing your medical- another hurdle out of he way! x

Loski - everything will be fine. I can understand your anxieties, but it will all be fine.

Lolly - wow! The end is in sight! I hear so many times that 'it will be longer to wait for a match if you are going for one' but this is not necessarily so! We were shown many profiles for single children and I know of many others who have been matched fairly quickly to a single child. There are far, far more young single babies and toddlers in the system now than ever!

Lyns - shocking news about your LO's clothes and lack of possessions. I assumed that FC must get a fair allowance per child as our LO had lots of beautiful clothes, plenty of toys and equipment. Perhaps this is not the case? Even so, clothes and shoes that small - so sad.
That little chaps life is going to be turned right around being with you! Gives me a warm feeling thinking of him being nurtured by you now

Hope everyone else is fine. xxx

We have just re-done our CRB's (now DBS) on-line as ours will run out before our court date. We have our last LAC review in March and we will then be applying for the adoption order. Can't wait for our girl to be OUR GIRL!!!!!!!

XXXXXX

 

[ipen44]

Lyns--So happy that little boy is with you now. He will get everything he has been missing.

I had 3 foster kids. One was very well cared for and had lots of toys, clothes, etc. He was a little boy. His sisters were not so lucky. They stayed with a woman who used foster children for the $. She would spend the stipend on herself. When I picked them up, they had one trash bag. It was full of broken toys (like pieces of a board games--literally like the cardboard part broken) and too small rags with holes that I suppose were meant to be clothes. The only nice thing they had was 3 very fancy church dresses each. She would dress them up for church so that everyone would think she was a saint. Terrible what people do.

 

[LolaM]

Lyns--So happy that little boy is with you now. He will get everything he has been missing.

I had 3 foster kids. One was very well cared for and had lots of toys, clothes, etc. He was a little boy. His sisters were not so lucky. They stayed with a woman who used foster children for the $. She would spend the stipend on herself. When I picked them up, they had one trash bag. It was full of broken toys (like pieces of a board games--literally like the cardboard part broken) and too small rags with holes that I suppose were meant to be clothes. The only nice thing they had was 3 very fancy church dresses each. She would dress them up for church so that everyone would think she was a saint. Terrible what people do.

yes. I was a foster child and I could tell you the horror stories of sitting in my fostermothers SILs house--and hearing her say that she wouldnt DREEEEAM of spending HER hard earned money on a foster child when the child was just going to walk out of her house with said item--all the while--her son was packing HIS belongings (that she had bought) and those of his new wife for a move out of state!!!! I was speechless--I didnt know WHAT to say, I have never spoken to them again and I never will. One thing my foster parents instilled in me, I do not have to be treated that way. Of course, these are the same people that were betting money I wouldnt get into a specific college because their son didnt get in...well guess what jackass??? I got in and my fosterchild ass graduated byjesus! Stick that in your pipe and smoke it.
ok, enough of that sass! Now we must keep reciepts and show what was purchased for the chld and it must go with the child when it leaves our house