Adoption journey

[fluffystar]

Hi Ladies, just been catching up on here. Lolly and Lola, you have both been talking about medicals, do you mind me asking what it is they look for? Is it just general stuff or do they want you to be a certain weight etc. Lolly, I think I would be just like you and worry over everything lol!!

We have our initial visit booked for 14th Jan with the LA we went to last week (ill call them LA P - they were the smaller more welcoming ones) and then we just had a letter today from the other LA we went to a month ago (ill call them LA C - the bigger and scary one!!). We had to fill out a long questionnaire for LA C before they would decide whether to do an initial visit and they have now replied to say we will be assigned a SW who will be in touch to arrange the visit. The whole process is starting to feel a bit more real now!

xx

 

[Lolly1985]

Hi Fluffy! Great news that you have some appointments coming up. Totally agree that having something concrete to work towards makes it real, scarily real, but excitingly real at the same time!!

For my medical today I had to fill out a form, declaring any illnesses/conditions past or present. Outlined fertility treatments, had to say whether receiving any current medical care or under any specialists etc. Then had to fill in a section about health and lifesyle. The doctor also had to fill a section out which he takes from your medical records - pretty similar stuff (just ensuring you haven't fibbed anywhere!) The actual physical medical test included height and weight (BMI calculation), eye sight check, blood pressure, mini neuro exam (touch my finger and then your nose etc), urine sample, pulse, listened to my chest and felt my stomach. Took about 15 mins. Don't worry about weight, lots of people are over the recommended BMI, as long as you are not really over weight to the point it is impacting your day to day health and ability to parent it should be fine. They have to be realistic. I know my DF is over his BMI target weight, but it really broad, wide shoulders, big chest etc. He does not look what he weighs at all.

I would say don't worry, but then I would be a giant hypocrite!!!

 

[LolaM]

Hi Ladies, just been catching up on here. Lolly and Lola, you have both been talking about medicals, do you mind me asking what it is they look for? Is it just general stuff or do they want you to be a certain weight etc. Lolly, I think I would be just like you and worry over everything lol!!

We have our initial visit booked for 14th Jan with the LA we went to last week (ill call them LA P - they were the smaller more welcoming ones) and then we just had a letter today from the other LA we went to a month ago (ill call them LA C - the bigger and scary one!!). We had to fill out a long questionnaire for LA C before they would decide whether to do an initial visit and they have now replied to say we will be assigned a SW who will be in touch to arrange the visit. The whole process is starting to feel a bit more real now!

xx

I dont know what they are looking for, im waiting for the paperwork from my SW. I hope they arent looking for a specific weight because I wont make it and neither will my hubs. I think its just a general check up, but my fosterparents both smoked like chimneys and they passed, so I guess we shall see.

 

[Loski83]

Hi everyone, sorry not been on lots going on at the moment with Christmas coming up. Our lo loves all the sparkly lights everywhere and has been to see santa. I cannot wait to see her little face christmas morning. Lolam don't worry about medical it will be fine. I hope everyone has a great Christmas and zero I hope your little pickle has settled well and that you have a great first christmas together xxx

 

[Milty]

Well I finally got a call from my new SW which was nice since its been 3 months. However most of it was to let me know I had forms expiring.

She did send our case in a general info thing for 6 different children. This was a nice surprise but odd at the same time since we havnt even meet.

So in general I'm not sure what to expect. She is very different from our last SW.

 

[puppymom32]

Lola you will be fine our paperwork was very simple just a one sheet page the the Dr had to sign to say we have no major medical concerns.

 

[bluebumble]

Hi Lolly

yes I am still here in the background. we were due to go to panel in december but sadly our sw went off sick 3 weeks before our panel date and we found out none of our par had been typed up from his notes so panel delayed. Sadly we have had to be assigned a new sw (as our old one is long term sick) who has virtually had to start our hs again all our referees have to be visited for a second time and individual interviews etc done again.

It nearly broke us and we nearly walked away on a couple of occassions but we are still here and fighting for a chance to bring our little legs who is out there somewhere home. We have been given a prov new panel date but we are trying not to jinx it and telling nobody.

Lola/fluffy - dont worry about BMI (mine is 35 and I was passed ok)

its nice reading that everyone seems to be doing well and i will no doubt pop in from time to time and of course let you all know if we have any more news

Have a lovely christmas everyone - especially those with new little legs and their first christmas

xx

 

[Lolly1985]

Oh Bluebumble, how horrible for you I'm so sorry that you have had to start again, it seems crazy when they have all your information, but I can see that a new SW has to 'sell you' as a couple so needs to know more and get a better feel for you than reading a piece of paper. It does seem extreme though Good for you to keep fighting though, it will be worth it, every step when your LO is home forever. Thinking of you hun, and I totally understand with you keeping your panel date to yourself, I would too. I hope I log on one day and ready that bam, you are going to be a mummy

Well I am in the midst of a mass baking session. Great Grandma's apple chutney recipe in full swing, next will be the attempting the crackers to go with the chutney and the cheese I have bought from a busy Tesco yesterday. Then cakes and buscuits this afternoon. YUM!!! Well, yum hopefully.....

 

[zero7]

Bluebumble- so sorry to hear of your delays. It is so frustrating (believe me, we know only too well) please stick with it and try to stay strong - it will be so worth it honey.

We have bought pickle a rocking horse for Christmas - can't wait to see her gorgeous little face when she takes the wrapping off! We love her so much!!

Hope everyone is well and heading for a lovely Christmas!

XXXXXX

 

[puppymom32]

Hope all of you lovely ladies have a wonderful Christmas if I dont talk to you before then. Thinking of you all.

how frustrating blueb like zero said hun just hang in there it will all be worth it in the end.

 

[Lolly1985]

Merry Christmas to you all

I hope that you have a happy and healthy time, and that 2013 makes all of your wishes come true (if they haven't alreday )

With lots of festive cheer,

Lolly

Thank you for all the lovely support this year ladies, you are a great bunch

 

[Loski83]

Happy christmas to everyone hope you all have a good one and as lolly said thankyou to everyone this year for the support and advice. Xx

 

[Lolly1985]

Hi everyone!!

How were your Christmases? Zero, Loski, how were your first Christmases as mummies? I hope all those with LOs loved every second, and all those still waiting enjoyed the thought of the happiness that is to come

Love Lolly xxxxx

 

[Loski83]

We had a great day and really loved having our lo there. The last week has been hard though as lo is really bad with a chest infection that just won't clear up. Hope she's better soon. Anyway has everyone else had a good christmas?

 

[Lolly1985]

Oh no Loski, poor LO, I really hope she makes a speedy recovery. I imagine it must be horrible seeing her suffer, lots of mummy cuddles in order me thinks

Hope everyone is well?

Went to a family party last night. I was making endless excuses to some of DF's cousins as to why we were not getting married next year. Mentioned to DF what I had said and he replied 'Why? I have just told (cousin) that it is because we are adopting, I am over the moon and am proud to give the reason why'!! So I then had to go and tell them the truth so they didn't hear it second hand So so sweet of DF and makes me realise just how far he has come, but slightly annoying at the same time as maybe we should have discussed it first Oh well, he is right and I am proud, just paranoid at the same time

 

[dreamofabean]

Aww lolly bless your dh!! We have also started telling people! It's so exciting isn't it?! X

 

[LolaM]

well--my hubs has an interview for a job in Italy! Great opportunity but that means no adoption.

 

[Lolly1985]

Hi Dream! How are you? You must be close to your prep training now?

It is exciting, and I am so overwhelmed that every single person has been so positive. Although we have chosen who to tell, and so they are close friends and family at this stage and so you would expect it I guess... But even so, their comments have made me want to blub happy tears I am still at the 'wobble' stage though, terrified of jinxing the most positive thing in our lives together so far - is that normal or am I just being negative?

 

[Lolly1985]

Oh my goodness Lola, well done to hubs, but so sad if you had to stop your adoption dreams at the same time. How are you feeling about things? xxx

 

[dreamofabean]

Yeah getting close now! Start 17th jan! We are very excited but had sad family news lately, my nan has cancer, so we haven't had that much time to think about it.
I know what you mean about jinxing it though, I feel that way a bit but I'm determined to stay positive. I have bought lots of little things for our little one already!! Lol. Just gender neutral toys and books! Very exciting though! X