Am I being OTT?

[jessabella]

I think we are saying the same thing but ...maybe I didnt word it correct myself....I think defending yourself is completely different than ramming down someones throat..I didnt mean to say that was what you mean....what I was saying is that defending ourselves is perfectly normal..but I have seen it where people take it too far when defending themselves as to make the other person feel small..which fair enough they asked for it but still didnt make it right..
oh well..like you said we all have our opinion about it..and I think essentially we are on the same boat...

 

[trumpetbum]

Eala pretty much said what I think.

 

[Eala]

Twiggy - no-one is saying you are ignorant for explaining or defending your decision . I don't think you are getting what Jessa and I are saying. Also, please note that I specifically said that I wasn't talking about you when I said that some people take it too far. Defending your opinion by explaining the benefits, nothing wrong with that. But there are people out there who go so far as to tell people that they are wrong for using disposables, at which point, to me, they are on the same level as the person who criticised them in the first place. Both people are being rude about another person's parenting choice, and the idea of "But they were rude first..." doesn't really wash with me.

Again, just to reiterate - I am not saying that is what you do Twiggy, I am saying that there are some people out there who do do that.

 

[Tiff]

I've seen people take it too far. Like have someone get critical and snarky when someone made a disparaging comment about cloth and go on and on about disposables, landfills, etc. People definitely can go OTT for sure!

When people said stuff to me I would just smile and give my reasons for using them and then anything else after that went in one ear and out the other. Granted, if people kept up with it I'd stop hanging around them as much.

 

[Missy89]

Sorry didnt mean to cause a discussion!

Thank-you for all your replies!

I've re-added my friends, I told them calmly why Ive made my choice and that I don't want thier opions on the matter if they can't say anything nice, in the same way I wouldnt ever discourage them from thier parenting choices. So its a start, don't think im gunna be showing off my slings on facebook when they get here/ive made them tho!

 

[Annunakian]

I sometimes wonder if some people think disposables were always here.

The filters on Facebook are nice for allowing limited info. I don't see why you couldn't still put those things on there.

 

[Mynx]

Every parent will have their own parenting style and if they choose not to use cloth then it's up to them. Whilst their entitled to an opinion, they have no right to be judgemental about someone else's decision to use fluff, just as we have no right to be judgemental about sposie users.
I still use sposies at night so I'm not a true full time fluffer yet, I need to find a decent night nappy that will cope with my daughter's Niagra Falls wees

 

[lepaskilf]

I just don't understand why people can. Be so rude as to say it too you! There are a slot of things I think when people tell me stuff but most I would never dream of saying as it. Might hurt their feelings or it s not my place to say anything! People need to learn to be nice!

 

[pinkclaire]

If someone told me my decision was disgusting I would definately retaliate I wouldn't be able to help myself! I actually think deleting them was quite a dignified way of saying that was out of order! Although I think what you've said about re-adding them will hopefully make them think twice about questioning your parenting techniques and hopefully will educate them not to be so judgemental in the future x

 

[VictoriaElaur]

I am currently pregnant with our first. We want to use cloth, breastfeed ect ect and generally do our best for our baby and the environment where we can.

All good until we mentioned using cloth to friends and family. My lovely husbands family were the worst. The were actually horrified that I would even think about it. They also said they would flatly refuse to change a cloth and when my baby stays over she would return with a disposable on....
I will not name names but one actually said (whilst i was still talking) "she won’t last, wait till she has the kid she'll soon learn"
As I say that was the worst reaction. The others just couldn't understand what i was talking about.

Personally I don’t understand why i would use disposables, but i just smile and state my reasons, if they dont listen i try and change the subject. I can totally understand wanting to fight your corner, its all too tempting to get really annoyed. Sometimes I SO SO want to tell them to stick it!!

However people never want to be proven wrong and i figger if i can tell them my opinion and keep them on my side I may convert someone one day.

 

[pinkclaire]

I am currently pregnant with our first. We want to use cloth, breastfeed ect ect and generally do our best for our baby and the environment where we can.

All good until we mentioned using cloth to friends and family. My lovely husbands family were the worst. The were actually horrified that I would even think about it. They also said they would flatly refuse to change a cloth and when my baby stays over she would return with a disposable on....
I will not name names but one actually said (whilst i was still talking) "she won’t last, wait till she has the kid she'll soon learn"
As I say that was the worst reaction. The others just couldn't understand what i was talking about.

Personally I don’t understand why i would use disposables, but i just smile and state my reasons, if they dont listen i try and change the subject. I can totally understand wanting to fight your corner, its all too tempting to get really annoyed. Sometimes I SO SO want to tell them to stick it!!

However people never want to be proven wrong and i figger if i can tell them my opinion and keep them on my side I may convert someone one day.

My response would be well if your not going to respect my wishes as a parent she/he will not be staying with you. It's rediculous, I would never leave my child with someone who disrepected my wishes like that. My winner is usually to show how soft a cloth nappy is inside and compare to a disposable, why wouldn't you want that next to your babys precious skin xx

 

[VictoriaElaur]

There is so much I want to say sometimes.... and to be honest with you, people that behave like that ultimately lose out. For example; She won’t have the baby over night or very rarely. My mum who is very supportive will have the baby when she likes.
It’s about trust, If I can’t trust you with using the nappy I choose and not giving her artificial sweetener (another long story!) then I can’t trust you with my most precious little baby FULL STOP.
I would like to just lose my temper sometimes but I just couldn't for my husband’s sake so I just smile and say that I don’t agree. I do absolutely love my in-laws though, I just don’t love everything they do. We all must have people like this in our lives.

People don’t like people who go against the majority, it’s scary for them because we think for ourselves. I guess that’s why we love coming here. Support

 

[pinkclaire]

There is so much I want to say sometimes.... and to be honest with you, people that behave like that ultimately lose out. For example; She won’t have the baby over night or very rarely. My mum who is very supportive will have the baby when she likes.
It’s about trust, If I can’t trust you with using the nappy I choose and not giving her artificial sweetener (another long story!) then I can’t trust you with my most precious little baby FULL STOP.
I would like to just lose my temper sometimes but I just couldn't for my husband’s sake so I just smile and say that I don’t agree. I do absolutely love my in-laws though, I just don’t love everything they do. We all must have people like this in our lives.

People don’t like people who go against the majority, it’s scary for them because we think for ourselves. I guess that’s why we love coming here. Support

Yep I completely understand, I am the same with my in laws I love them to pieces but they would quite happily feed my LO fish and chips from the chippy without thinking twice about it! Although if I told them not to I'm sure they would listen.

When your baby comes their like the most precious thing, its bad enough leaving them with anyone let alone someone your not completely confident with will follow your wishes xx