Am I the only one who gets upset?

[Uvlollypop]

hey carley, hugs

 

[ryder]

There are many things that I read on here which upset me... Mainly because I work in a hospital with a labour ward and PED's ward so I have got to witness some of the ridiculous things babies and children have had to go through... and yes, alot of times it is because of parental stupidity... Which is one beef I have with people taking things they read online so seriously and thinking they know everything because they read this statistic or that, or they self-diagnosed their child based on something they read.

These people can never imagine how heartbreaking it is to see these children sick in the hospital or to see a baby in the morgue. Babies in our hospital get an actual box (rather then stetcher) to wait in the morgue in, so you always know when you see a box that it is a baby.

I never posted a viable at 24ws... I don't think I could honestly say I was relieved, because I know if my baby WAS born then, that it would have been a nightmare and the chance of survival isn't great...

Though there are some babies who survive and do fine later... It is a rough first few years for them.

Every day I worry and am paranoid that something bad could happen, and until that baby is born and in my arms I wont stop.

 

[Carley]

Right now for me I'm personally taking week by week. I'm counting down to 24 weeks, which is 3 weeks away for me. I'm going to celebrate, not because she may be viable but because it's my milestone, that I've so far made it further then I did with Jacob. From that point I'm taking week by week. Because in my head 25/26/27/28etc weeks is better then 24 weeks. If I can make it to 30 weeks fantastic, 32 weeks even better I shouldn't need NICU, 37 weeks bloody GREAT!

 

[leedsforever]

I agree Carley when i was at that stage I was just so happy to keep cooking my LO each day!!

The only milestone I was really relieved to reach was 12 weeks!! I was so nervous in my first 12 weeks, I was adamant I was going to suffer a m/c! I dont know why cos I have never suffered one before but I really had it in my head that it was going to be snapped away from me!

Ryder I agree I wont stop worrying until I hold her in my arms.... and I bet then the worry wont even stop!!

 

[xXx Vamp xXx]

Right now for me I'm personally taking week by week. I'm counting down to 24 weeks, which is 3 weeks away for me. I'm going to celebrate, not because she may be viable but because it's my milestone, that I've so far made it further then I did with Jacob. From that point I'm taking week by week. Because in my head 25/26/27/28etc weeks is better then 24 weeks. If I can make it to 30 weeks fantastic, 32 weeks even better I shouldn't need NICU, 37 weeks bloody GREAT!

 

[mrscookie]

group hug everyone
xxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[fein&waiting]

I posted that i'd already made it to that point but not as yay my baby is viable post, just that i'd already hit the milestone of that many weeks. Reading all the stories of ppl giving birth early is one of my biggest fears and i'm always hoping (praying) that i'll get through the whole pregnancy with both of us healthy. I don't know if it's like that for everyone who posts their 24 week milestone, but that's how it was for me. It was the mere concept that i'm practically 6 months preggo and only another 3 and half to go! and i have no prior experience except for 2 chem preggies. I'm sure there are a fair few posters who have looked at it in the way i do

 

[Aidan's Mummy]

yer i agree with melbo to everyone
xx

 

[Dragonfly]

I take the viable at 24 weeks with a pinch of salt and hope it dosnt decide to come then as to be honest i dont think many survive as i havnt heard of any at 24 weeks? I want mine to stay in there 10 more weeks at least to be cooked right.

 

[keelykat]

I was petrified untill the moment i held my baby in my arms and saw him, but i did celebrate in my head certain milestones ie the 12 week mark, and much later after id had the 20 week scan. Only because i was getting closer to my baby actually being recognised as a baby and would have some hope of survival-i wouldnt have wanted my baby born so early. I remember people wishing their baby would arrive at say 38 weeks for example even that was too early for me i was so scared of something going wrong.

After seeing my SIL going through a few miscarriages, one baby of which she lost quite late and had to give bith to him and got to hold him etc... i couldnt totally relax untill my baby was here safe and well. I didnt once take for granted that my baby was developing well inside me. Each scan id be relieved but still nervous.

My SIL had her first baby early, and she was tiny-we call her a miracle baby as she had so many losses afterwards and had to have an operation/now cant have any more. (long story). She's now 14, and doing well.

I can understand you being upset-loosing a baby at any stage of the pregnancy is horrible/devastating etc.

keely.

ps-i still think every baby is a miracle and a gift to be cherished.

 

[isil]

I don't think Carley has posted since the middle of september....is there any news on her? or am I wrong?

 

[TashaAndBump]

I think she is fine but she chose to leave bnb for personal reasons x

 

[ALI]

I take the viable at 24 weeks with a pinch of salt and hope it dosnt decide to come then as to be honest i dont think many survive as i havnt heard of any at 24 weeks? I want mine to stay in there 10 more weeks at least to be cooked right.

Firstly , I wish Carley all the best.

Secondly, I am sorry if i am rude but I think you should do some research first before making such a comment on this site , i find it incredible that so many people are so ignorant of just how many babies are born and survive at 24 weeks. I am sorry if I sound rude but I found your comments quite patronising and to be honest a little bit offensive.

The same ignorance resulted in the majority of Mp's voting against lowering the abortion limit earlier this year as they said "babies are unlikely to survive at 24 weeks or lower" One confidently stated that their lungs are not developed enough to live. Well actually they are given a steroid injection which boosts the lung development so that is complete nonsense.

Our 24 weeker was born in Portsmouth and a a baby was born in the same unit at 21 weeks 6 days, weighing 14 ounces. She was left to die, being under 24 weeks, but after a few hours , a nurse noticed she was still breathing and they put her on oxygen and she has just celebrated her 4th birthday and is a perfectly healthy 4 year old. https://www.lucyblueparker.com/

Anyone with a baby born prematurely needs as much support as possible and your negative and ignorant comments do not help. Our little one may not have been "cooked right" as you say and it really does hurt for both of us that we missed out on so much , never feeling a bump or baby kicking , experiencing ante natal classes or normal term birth but we love our 24 weeker to bits whatever she may face, so please think twice before making generalisations like that again.

 

[Mamafy]

^^^^^^

ditto + + more hugs for Charlotte

 

[Aidan's Mummy]

I take the viable at 24 weeks with a pinch of salt and hope it dosnt decide to come then as to be honest i dont think many survive as i havnt heard of any at 24 weeks? I want mine to stay in there 10 more weeks at least to be cooked right.

Quite a few babies survive at 24 weeks and sadly quite a few die aswell But take Mummy2manys lil princess isabelle for example she was born at 24 weeks she was due in december. and she was such a little fighter. Now she is at home with her family and is a beautiful, thriving baby just like any other baby.
xx

 

[porkpie1981]

to all the ladies that had a baby early in their pregnancy. I have never and hope not to . I have to say that i dont really go into many other threads than 2nd tri at the mo. I was thinking that when i reached 24 weeks i would post a thread like that . I also did it when i reached 12 weeks. I have to say my last pregnancy reached 12 weeks and i went for my 1st scan to find out there was just a sac and no baby (blighted ovum) So this time even tho i did a post saying i was 12 i knew that ur never out of the woods till you have a healthy baby in ur arms. This pregnancy ive had heavy bleeding and actually thought my waters had broke due to heavy watery bleeding. I knew at that early stage that there was no chance that my baby would be ok so i think just the fact that i can get to 24 weeks , wont make me relax but as others have said at least have hope. I in no way want to have a baby at 24 weeks ( i want to keep the lo safe for as long as possible). My mum is blind due to being born 6 weeks early and tho it was nearly 60 yrs ago and medicine wasnt as advanced, it just shows even 6 weeks early can be damaging

 

[Hevz]

When you see posts or people saying IRL that my baby is viable at 24 weeks and they will be healthy? Is it just me? Because I wish they knew the truth if a baby was born at 24 weeks. Am I over reacting?

I've been thinking this for weeks but thought maybe it was me being oversensitive....I lost my little girl at 24wksand know that 24weeks means that they will at least be recussitated (sp?) and given a chance but there's lots who don't make it even after a long struggle. On the other hand I don't wanna be really negative as lots do pull through but it's not something that I celebrated this week as Smudge turned 24wks....it's been a difficult week and I'm terrified of having yet another prem baby. I lost my 34wk old son too so nope 24wks is definitely not what I class as "out of the woods" IYKWIM

 

[Gwizz]

I've just read this post..after posting a thread to celebrate reaching the 24 week milestone. I dont think there is anything wrong with celebrating reaching a milestone in your pregnancy. When you have lost a baby getting to 24 weeks is as significant a milestone as ever. I lost my baby at 20 weeks and my treatment in hospital was awful because my baby was not recognised as a baby as she had not reached 24 weeks. therefore she got not help and was left to dye after a 20 min struggle in a pan. I'm under no illusions that having a baby at 24 weeks or any premature baby is going to be ok, but i defence of the girls who celebrate the milestone, its just that a celebration of reaching a point when your egg can be called a baby. Stupid i know but we do celebrate lots of stupid things. I guess it just breaks a long 9 months now into blocks that you can aim for. Even my consultant has said that now i'm 24 weeks she wants me to relax(thats a joke!!) and enjoy the pregnancy and reduced my weekly appointments to monthly.

So i hope this doesn't offend anyone but i think most of the ladies who celebrate 24 weeks are not thinking oh great easy ride now and my baby will be ok if its born, more right thats another milestone out way, i'm pleased with myself for getting this far and making this baby and i want to share it with my friends on bnb

I agree honey...

I celebrated my 12 week milestone, it didn't mean I wanted my baby out at that point? There is no shame that people are happy that there ''fetus'' is now a viable baby, and are happy to celebrate this.
My first milestone was 9 weeks (scan) then 12 weeks, my next one is 15 weeks, then it will be 20 (scan) then 24 as baby will be classed as a baby and not a fetus, then 30 weeks, and then 40.

I also agree with both of you girls .....

 

[Jemma_x]

I gave birth to my little angel at 21 weeks 3 days and we only had 15 precious minutes with her, if our little girl would have survived she would have had health problems and we would have dealt with that but sadley it wasnt to be. With this baby i will be celebrating the 24 week milestone not because i want baby to come then but i will celebrate it as i know if my child comes early again, at 24 weeks they will have a better chance of survival at 24 weeks even though they may still have health problems

 

[princess_bump]

I gave birth to my little angel at 21 weeks 3 days and we only had 15 precious minutes with her, if our little girl would have survived she would have had health problems and we would have dealt with that but sadley it wasnt to be. With this baby i will be celebrating the 24 week milestone not because i want baby to come then but i will celebrate it as i know if my child comes early again, at 24 weeks they will have a better chance of survival at 24 weeks even though they may still have health problems

jemma i just wanted to say you're an amazingly strong women