Any OCD Mums? or mums with axiety disorders?

[youngwife20]

Does anyones OCD effect other people? I have a thing were my mum has to say I love you every time i leave the room or she leaves the room or we hang up the phone or go to bed if im staying over . if not she might die ( god forbid ) i have been like that since i was 8 years old. because my brother died when i was 8 and i didnt say i love you when he died.. so its put the fear in me.

Also sometimes i need my husband to do certian things. say things do a certain movement if he doesnt i get a headache.

today he was playing with my daughter and her blanket doing peekaboo. he did it 5 times. im not so bad with 5 i can tolerate it but i couldnt today and he had to do it one more time. stuff like that..

ocd rituals that involve someone else are tirieing and annoying because the other person gets annoyed. and i get stressed when they take ages to do the action i need to do. especialy in my head if i think im saving there life lol which obvously im not.

 

[youngwife20]

Right there with all of you.
I have trouble sleeping at night and I can swear I hear my son crying and he's sound asleep.

I'm too protective of him and for the last few weeks I've refused everyone who asks to watch him or take him for a night. I need him home with me.

Same here! I always think I hear Charlotte crying when in fact she's sound asleep.

I also feel insecure about anyone watching my girl... it makes it hard to get much-needed alone time.

This is me too, I have anxiety, I am on sleeping tablets as part of my PND, I go to sleep but cant get back to sleep after the first feed - he still wakes up 3 plus times a night. I always think i hear LO crying when I am in the bath, and shout down to DH to make sure LO is ok, or when I have the radio on.

Take care girls xxxx

hey hun why dont you stick around xx

what helps your axiety? xx

 

[Housewife83]

Yes mine has impacted on all parts of my life and my relationships with other people.

 

[youngwife20]

Me!

Generally I am okay with my anxiety at the moment. When I was younger it was a lot worse but actually, I think having a baby has given me a routine and stability that forces me to sort myself out a bit.

but I do worry a lot in the night. I regularly can't sleep and have to wake my OH to get some reassurance about stupid things that in the day seem so ridiculous. For example, I am not worried about it now but in the night I have a fear that I will be carrying Joni in her Moby sling, fall into the river, and not be able to get her out of the sling so she'll drown even though I'm managing to keep afloat. It's so stupid because the closest I ever get to a river is crossing a bridge on a bus. Another one is that I'll have her in the sling and be vacuuming and accidentally vacuum her eyeball out! Sounds so stupid but at 11pm I can be in tears panicking that I'll do it!!

I worry too that she will grow up to be anxious because my mum is an anxious person as well. But, I think that like you, I do make a conscious effort with Joni not to be so scared about things. I worry an awful lot, for example going out of the house and speaking to people, but I take Joni out every day and we go to places like story time at the library, and I just have a mantra of "suck it up" which seems to work. I hope she can escape it!

xxx

I have so much sympathy for these sorts of fears, and I too worry that my LO will have my anxiety disorders because I have them. I will do everything I can to protect her from them, as my mom was unable to protect me from hers and I feel it's given me a really rough go at life. What's helped me is to realize that there is no extra protective benefit of worrying. Worrying literally does NOTHING to make things better--it does quite the opposite, paralyzing us from making good choices.

When I have an OCD moment (e.g taking my daughter to the food court and worrying that she'll come down with a flu the next day from all the sick people who might be there), I remind myself that it's good decisions (not taking her back to the food court) and not panic attacks (obsessing about what she might have caught and how it will turn out) that will save her life. The same thing goes for your river fear and vacuum fear... Instead of fearing rivers, I'd practice getting my baby in and out of the wrap quickly so that if the worst case scenario ever happened, I'd be prepared. As for the vacuum thing, I'd put her in her bassinet when vacuuming so she's up off the floor and away from the vacuum hose.

Hope this helps--it's all that has kept me sane over the years!

xo

Amazing see! perfect solutions . anyone else would just say " thats silly get over it" but you understood her and gave her a valid logical solution to her fear it wasnt my fear but i found it helpful as maybe that wil help me put my fears into prospective . i think your a very smart woman! . you mentioned your mum and you having a rough life. did some of her axierty or ocd stuff rub on you and then manifest into other ocd symptoms xx

 

[youngwife20]

hi there i have quite bad OCD, I'm on medication which definitely tones it down a little bit and I'm on the waiting list for cbt so I'm looking forward to that, hopefully it will help a lot!

I've always had OCD tendancies from a young age, they got worse and when i was pregnant got very intense and worsened even more when I had the baby, i've since read that something can trigger it to get worse pre and postnatally.

I really want to improve things having a baby, a job and a degree to study is hard enough, adding OCD into the mix makes things a heck of a lot more stressful! However, i do feel it's improving slowly. Before I had Oliver I never went to the doctor or really told anyone properly about it and i've made an effort to try and tackle it this year by taking medication, reading self-help books and hopefully cbt will vastly improve it as well oliver gave me the confidence to go and talk to someone so I'm thankful to him for that. Feel free to message me anytime.

xx

I've been doing CBT for nearly 2 years now, and not going to lie, it hasn't helped me at all. I do it for depression, anxiety and slight aggraphobia. The most it's done is help ever so slightly with depression, not enough that I'd say is worth it. The thing that has helped me the most is being pregnant, as I want to be the best I can for my little boy and for him not to turn out like me. Although it is different for different people and I wish you the best of luck with it! xx

heyy how far gone are you im 16 weeks aswell as have a 7 month old, xx

 

[youngwife20]

I have suffered from OCD and anxiety since I was little and recently have suffered from pnd with both LOs. I am determined not to pass on my anxiety issues to my daughters but have been finding things tough recentlyBig hugs to everyone x

Hello How are you today? do you want to share what your finding tough? xx and weldone for being determined xx

 

[youngwife20]

OCD on medication here!

I also worry about the effect on my LO. However I try to take each day one step at a time. I make sure that I'm looking after my own health as much as I can.

When I'm having an OCD moment I talk to my OH about it. He helps me to get over it. I also apply the things that I learnt in CBT.

I think being aware of the problem is the best way to handle it.

Thanks for starting this thread, I think it's a good idea for us all to support each other.

aww your very welcome i am glad you find it helpful! and im glad yoru oh is supportive and helps yoru ocd. what made you decide to start taking meds ? how bad did it get. how long have you been on meds if u dont mind me asking xx

 

[pinklightbulb]

I do. I had a thread about it in GS.
Don't know what to do

 

[youngwife20]

Yes mine has impacted on all parts of my life and my relationships with other people.

how has people been with you when u say do something ocd like? do people understand?

 

[youngwife20]

I hope ive replied to everyones post. that annoys me when i miss a message as i hate not replieing to people lol.

I have questions..
When did your ocd start?
when was it at its worsed.
what helps it get better.
does your oh understand ur ocd and help?
how has other people around you reacted to your ocd do they understand.
when did you start meds?
does anyone elses ocd make them ask alot of questions lol i find when i am out for example when i was at school i used to ask questions constantly even while i was asking i could tell myself getting axious.. also with my husband i ask soo many things" have u done this. how did you do it? why did you do it like that? can you explain why you did it like that? drives him mad..

 

[leoniebabey]

I have ocd, always have done I feel bad.as its started rubbing off on LO hell put things back into certain orders and.cleans things for me lol!

 

[youngwife20]

I do. I had a thread about it in GS.
Don't know what to do

aw gossh hun theres so much pain in what you wrote im readding it now will get back to u when ive finished reading xx

weed is the worst thing for someone who has a seritonin imbalance, which you have ( and so do i) because of your ocd etc. it wil only make it worse. ( still reading im ading as i read


EDIT- finnished readding. you are not a rubbish mum. i couldnt touch handles at all when i was a teenager. and also people suggested u try counciling have u? and how has it been now ur second baby arived? how r things with ur oh. honestly i feel so badd for you xxxx

 

[Housewife83]

aww your very welcome i am glad you find it helpful! and im glad yoru oh is supportive and helps yoru ocd. what made you decide to start taking meds ? how bad did it get. how long have you been on meds if u dont mind me asking xx

I decided to start taking medication when I was diagnosed. I was really at the end of my tether and desperate for help, as I was finding even some basic functions difficult. I went to my GP and they prescribed CBT and medication.

Apart from my pregnancy I have been on them since then. I stopped when I was pregnant because I couldn't keep tablets down. I went back on them when LO was a few months old because I felt like I needed them again. The version I take are safe while breastfeeding which is nice.

I have found the medication totally wonderful. The first lot I had made me feel poorly but the other versions I have tried work well.

For me it isn't a magic cure but it gives me something to lean on. The best way I can describe it is that I still have OCD thoughts but the medication helps me to sit outside of the OCD thoughts and examine them for what they are.

While I am on the medication I can see those thoughts and behaviors and say to myself 'This is an OCD pattern of thinking. You need to ignore this' and for the most part I can.

I'm of to bed now but I will be keeping my eye on this wonderful thread.

 

[pinklightbulb]

I hope ive replied to everyones post. that annoys me when i miss a message as i hate not replieing to people lol.

I have questions..
When did your ocd start?
when was it at its worsed.
what helps it get better.
does your oh understand ur ocd and help?
how has other people around you reacted to your ocd do they understand.
when did you start meds?
does anyone elses ocd make them ask alot of questions lol i find when i am out for example when i was at school i used to ask questions constantly even while i was asking i could tell myself getting axious.. also with my husband i ask soo many things" have u done this. how did you do it? why did you do it like that? can you explain why you did it like that? drives him mad..

Mine started when I was pregnant with Eamon, somewhere in the second tri. I've stuggled with it since.

It was at its worst when I was pregnant with Liam. I couldn't even stand to touch Eamon at its very worst-- I couldn't touch anyone (I have contamination OCD). I didn't want OH near me at all, and every time I touched Eamon I would cry because it felt so nice to be near him and hug him but I couldn't make myself relax about it. I would watch him run around and be free and not worry about getting into dirt etc, but then I couldn't even hug him without freaking about where he'd been and what he'd been touching etc. This is what made me get help.

I went through CBT and have refused meds as I didn't want them when I BF. Things have calmed a lot after having Liam, maybe the hormone shift?

OH doesn't get it at all, and isn't supportive really in the least.

 

[youngwife20]

I have ocd, always have done I feel bad.as its started rubbing off on LO hell put things back into certain orders and.cleans things for me lol!

hugs xx

 

[youngwife20]

aww your very welcome i am glad you find it helpful! and im glad yoru oh is supportive and helps yoru ocd. what made you decide to start taking meds ? how bad did it get. how long have you been on meds if u dont mind me asking xx

I decided to start taking medication when I was diagnosed. I was really at the end of my tether and desperate for help, as I was finding even some basic functions difficult. I went to my GP and they prescribed CBT and medication.

Apart from my pregnancy I have been on them since then. I stopped when I was pregnant because I couldn't keep tablets down. I went back on them when LO was a few months old because I felt like I needed them again. The version I take are safe while breastfeeding which is nice.

I have found the medication totally wonderful. The first lot I had made me feel poorly but the other versions I have tried work well.

For me it isn't a magic cure but it gives me something to lean on. The best way I can describe it is that I still have OCD thoughts but the medication helps me to sit outside of the OCD thoughts and examine them for what they are.

While I am on the medication I can see those thoughts and behaviors and say to myself 'This is an OCD pattern of thinking. You need to ignore this' and for the most part I can.

I'm of to bed now but I will be keeping my eye on this wonderful thread.

sweetdreams hun! and thank you very much for answering my question and wow i didnt know there was one you can take when ur breastfeeding! thank u xx

 

[pinklightbulb]

I do. I had a thread about it in GS.
Don't know what to do

aw gossh hun theres so much pain in what you wrote im readding it now will get back to u when ive finished reading xx

weed is the worst thing for someone who has a seritonin imbalance, which you have ( and so do i) because of your ocd etc. it wil only make it worse. ( still reading im ading as i read


EDIT- finnished readding. you are not a rubbish mum. i couldnt touch handles at all when i was a teenager. and also people suggested u try counciling have u? and how has it been now ur second baby arived? how r things with ur oh. honestly i feel so badd for you xxxx

Now it's not as bad. I can handle a lot of things I couldn't during pregnancy. I have done counselling, and I feel that pregnancy has a lot to answer for in my case. I think it was the hormone shift that triggered it to begin with. Growing up I was fearless of everything, haha. But I wouldn't take my babies back for anything even though the pregnancies fried my brain so badly.

 

[youngwife20]

I hope ive replied to everyones post. that annoys me when i miss a message as i hate not replieing to people lol.

I have questions..
When did your ocd start?
when was it at its worsed.
what helps it get better.
does your oh understand ur ocd and help?
how has other people around you reacted to your ocd do they understand.
when did you start meds?
does anyone elses ocd make them ask alot of questions lol i find when i am out for example when i was at school i used to ask questions constantly even while i was asking i could tell myself getting axious.. also with my husband i ask soo many things" have u done this. how did you do it? why did you do it like that? can you explain why you did it like that? drives him mad..

Mine started when I was pregnant with Eamon, somewhere in the second tri. I've stuggled with it since.

It was at its worst when I was pregnant with Liam. I couldn't even stand to touch Eamon at its very worst-- I couldn't touch anyone (I have contamination OCD). I didn't want OH near me at all, and every time I touched Eamon I would cry because it felt so nice to be near him and hug him but I couldn't make myself relax about it. I would watch him run around and be free and not worry about getting into dirt etc, but then I couldn't even hug him without freaking about where he'd been and what he'd been touching etc. This is what made me get help.

I went through CBT and have refused meds as I didn't want them when I BF. Things have calmed a lot after having Liam, maybe the hormone shift?

OH doesn't get it at all, and isn't supportive really in the least.

im sooooo glad its alittle better for u . and its such a shame ur oh doesnt understand. maybe write him something about the thingd tht go through ur mind. i think he will be very suprised shocked. about what goes through an ocd persons mind and maybe wil help him understand how bad it is xx

going to bed now hun i will see any replys u post tomrowo xx

 

[youngwife20]

I do. I had a thread about it in GS.
Don't know what to do

aw gossh hun theres so much pain in what you wrote im readding it now will get back to u when ive finished reading xx

weed is the worst thing for someone who has a seritonin imbalance, which you have ( and so do i) because of your ocd etc. it wil only make it worse. ( still reading im ading as i read


EDIT- finnished readding. you are not a rubbish mum. i couldnt touch handles at all when i was a teenager. and also people suggested u try counciling have u? and how has it been now ur second baby arived? how r things with ur oh. honestly i feel so badd for you xxxx

Now it's not as bad. I can handle a lot of things I couldn't during pregnancy. I have done counselling, and I feel that pregnancy has a lot to answer for in my case. I think it was the hormone shift that triggered it to begin with. Growing up I was fearless of everything, haha. But I wouldn't take my babies back for anything even though the pregnancies fried my brain so badly.

hugs ssee what we do to have a family ey! you never expect to have issues like this before you get pregnant lol hormoens really mess with people! xx

 

[pinklightbulb]

Sweet dreams chicky.