Anyone else think they might get bad reactions when they announce pregnancy?

[baileybubs]

Hi everyone

My LG is 6 months old so the gap between her and our little pumpkin will be 15 months. I'm perfect fine with this, I think it's fab and happy to have a small age gap, even though this baby was a surprise a couple of months earlier than we intended on ttc!

But I am dreading telling our families, mainly df's. I don't want to be there, I just want df to tell them alone coz I just know they will upset me with their response. I know exactly what MIL will say "don't you think it's too soon?" Which is neither helpful nor nice, as this pregnancy is happening now how does asking if it's too soon help?!
I am hoping that my mum will be ok and I'm sure she will, maybe not 100% that it's the right time either though.

I know I shouldn't care what others think but I'd prefer support than useless negative comments.

It's probably not helping that I seem to have had a sudden bout of emotions today as it seems hormones may be kicking in, I just feel blue!

 

[kerri28]

We know we are going to get absolutely horrible reactions from just about everyone. For one thing my dh age, and my ex husband is a bit of a psycho and even though it's been many years I can see this bothering him. Not 100% sure how my girls will take it as they tend to mirror their father some times to stay in his good graces. I don't want to think about it. My dh's oldest is almost 18 and suffers from being emotionally disturbed and personality disorder and had to go to a group home after a extremely violent episode this past year after countless hospitalization a. I'm sure some people will frown upon it but they aren't me and this is our life and we can make our decisions just fine. We have lots of love to spread and give. Our children know that. I think dh's sister will be the most exciting and we are telling her first when we visit in a few weeks.

 

[Misscalais]

Mine boys are 14 months apart most people were excited for us ( my mum and siblings ), some told is we were crazy and that we'd have our hands full. ( DH family )
Both our boys were planned we weren't actively TTC but NTNP so hopful that it would happen but we were ok if it took a while. Both boys only took 1-2 cycles
Don't worry about what others think. As long as you and your DH are happy that's all that matters

 

[MaMaRed1012]

If only people could/would bite their tongues when someone has some exciting news. However, the world is different---just people saying whatever they want to whomever they want without understanding the pain that they say hurts others.

My kids are older----almost 16, almost 14, and 12. (my boys are only 18 months apart). I am due July 2014.

My family thinks I am crazy! I mean I have heard it all from why would you want to have a baby when your kids are grown to just bluntly saying I am crazy.

The worst was a friend who is a year older than myself and she is getting divorced and I just got remarried. She was sour about the wedding and even worse when I told her that we are expecting a baby. I wanted her to hear from me rather than the grapevine. She gave me the reaction I was expecting. Literally she said "I am envious of you two. I was supposed to be pregnant by this time but instead I'm going through a divorce." That was it. Not a congratulations at all.

Try and not let what others think bother you. Harder than expected. They may be shocked and they may make a comment; however, in the end they all will love the baby. They just sometimes don't know how hurtful their words/opinions are.

Congratulations and I hope you have a healthy and happy pregnancy!

 

[LiLi2]

I was a bit concerned about what others would say, but all I really cared about was that my fiancé and I were happy. We just recently got engaged after knowing each other for over 8 years and dating for over 3, so it's not like we were rushing into anything. But since we aren't married yet, I thought people would judge. We didn't tell anyone that we were TTC for that reason. We're pretty much just letting people believe that this was a pleasant surprise. lol

All I can say is when you're ready, you're ready.

Turns out, everyone I was worried about getting poor reactions from was very supportive and excited for us. Don't worry too much, just make sure that you express your happiness to the people you're telling and most likely, they will be happy for you.

 

[Perseids]

My pregnancy was a complete surprise. The father of the baby and I are not married and had only been officially dating a short while. Needless to say, telling my dad did not get a positive reaction.


My only advice, which I got from someone on here, is to seem happy when you tell the news. If you act delighted and mature when you tell the news, it would be downright rude for someone to reply with something snippy. That being said, you can't make everyone happy. I kept saying how my baby was a blessing, and, even though people were shocked and mad at me, they couldn't deny that it was. Try not to take the initial reactions too personally if you can...most people aren't their best when they get 'shocking' news. Just remember that you and your DF are happy about the new little one -- that is really all that matters! Best wishes!

 

[vickytoria88]

I worry about what my brother and my SIL2b will say. They live in jersey and we live in Cornwall and they are getting married 2 week before I am due. We have brought our flight tickets but found out I was pregnant after we brought them. You see the airline ban you from flying after 35 weeks and I'll be 38, so touch and go as to if I'll be allowed to fly. I think they will be upset about this.

 

[Eternal]

Yes I'm worried. My in laws particularly, she can be quite cutting and hurtful at the best of times and she has made it clear that we have enough already, this will be number 4, it was a surprise and in all I'll have 4, and under.

Still in laws don't bother with us all all and live 550 miles away so what business it really is of their I don't know. But waiting until the scan to tell them which is Wednesday. Dreading it.

My mums reaction was shock as it was which upset us enough, she is on board and happy now still.

 

[o0oCharlieo0o]

I was a bit worried, because people push their views onto you and its not fair, i got told my my SIL 'your mad!' Just because she finds it hard to cope with two kids and this will be my 4th, i said to her though well thats you, not me, i am doing fine with 3 and will cope with 4 too, and i often get people saying 'you've got your hands full' to that i always reply with 'I'd rather have them full than empty' tends to shut people up lol, in the he end i think i really dont care what anyone else thinks, i am me and this is how i want to live my life, loving and raising children, nothing i this world could be better than that in my eyes, and as long as me and my OH are happy with having another baby and we are over the moon then it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks so dont worry hun, this is your gorgeous baby and he/she is what you want, dont let anyone bring you down xxx

 

[baileybubs]

Thanks everyone, I am trying as hard as I can to tell myself that it's only me and df that matter, it's just hurtful when people aren't supportive about something we are so happy about.

But I guess the best thing to remember is that they will all love this baby too so who cares what their initial reactions are.

We are waiting til the 12 week scan to tell them which will be just before Christmas so we are going to take a picture of Emilia holding the scan pic with a t shirt on that says "I'm gonna be a big sister" and put it in family's Christmas cards! Hopefully that should tell them that we are happy about it and they should be too.

 

[rubysoho120]

I cried yesterday because we announced on halloween and my sister and her bf were not nice/happy. But you have to ignore the negativity. It sucks but what can you do? Enjoy your pregnancy and new baby.

 

[Zooy]

I'm a bit worried about the reactions from friends who know that life has thrown us a curve and we're still recovering. Plus my husband just started a new job.