Anyone LTTTC Number One?

[Sticky Beans]

There seems to be a few of us on downers at the moment! LTTC is so hard! I've not told many people that we are ttc so in conversations ref babies I find myself saying things like 'Me & DH aren't ready for kids yet' or ' we want some nice holidays 1st' - What a load of crap! Everytime I get into one of these conversations a little bit of me dies inside. Esp since most of my mates are now pregnant with their 2nd! Although I think I prefer this to people knowing and keep on asking how it's going.
My 1 close friend (without kids) that knows asks occasionally how we are getting on etc I never go into details all I normally say is Sh*t still not pregnant! as don't want to bore people with my problems, you guys on here probably know more about my LTTC battle than anyone else!

To make matters worse I am now on CD1 - YET AGAIN!!!! Argghhhh!

I plan on turning the music in my car up really loud on the way home from work and screaming!!! Lol!


On a brighter note - It's Friday! I have a 12 mile obsticle course to run tomorrow so hopefully I'll burn off some pent up frustration! Hope all you lovely ladies have nice plans for the weekend! Sending out hugs for those who need it!

xx

 

[dodgercpkl]

Screaming in my car was always a method of relaxation for me too!

*hugs* to everyone!

 

[wannabeprego]

@Sticky Beans, Big hus to you hun..so sorry the dammed witch got you...

 

[Feisty Fidget]

We all do seem to be on downers at the moment Maybe it's that old saying that Misery likes company?

Well back from fertility appointment, we were advised to allow a minimum of 2 hours so we paid out a small fortune for 3 hours in the car park and was back after 30 minutes

I tried giving her my cycle dates (the letter requested I bring them along) but she said it wasn't needed Apparently DH SA wasn't as okay as we were told by his GP and so she has requested another one. I have to be booked in for a HSG and once it is confirmed that I have no blockages she will look at the different medications to keep me ovulating. I was told by the GP that the NICE guidelines state that using clomid for anything over 12 cycles dramatically increases the risk of cancer whereas she has said that based on her clinical assessment it is fine If no joy with the clomid I will be prescribed injectables (presumably the same used for IVF? )

She was very to the point and although nice she didn't offer me any assurances. I know I shouldn't expect to be mollycoddled but lots of ladies say that their FS are wonderful and tell them that they will do everything medically possible to ensure they will be parents. I am trying to focus on the fact that I have my HSG procedure scheduled but I can't help but worry that she is going to fob us off with the clomid if the HSG comes back clear.

 

[dodgercpkl]

FF - sorry your FS wasn't more communicative then that. I completely get your frustration about the parking as well... so frustrating! Hopefully she'll have more answers to offer when the 2nd SA and the HSG results come back. *hugs*

 

[phoenixrose]

I feel you- had to see my 2.5 yr old nephew and 6 month old niece today at Thanksgiving.

Yeah I'm with you both on that. My niece (8) and nephew (3) were here yesterday and I love them to pieces but it just makes me even more crazy to have a child of my own. Then there's my SIL. I love her dearly but every 5 min she was saying things like "Are you sure you want one? I mean if you don't have one you don't have to deal with this". Ok. I'm not 5. I do know that having a child means going through rough times, pouts, crying, screaming etc. You just really aren't helping with your comment because YES! I do still want one. I'm very sure. Ugh.

Words can't even begin to describe how much I agree with you! Sometimes I just feel like saying, "YES! I really do want one, if you don't like yours so much, how about you give me one."

 

[dodgercpkl]

Yeah... it wasn't the best of moments, but to be fair to her, I know she loves her kids very much and was trying (badly) to make me feel better that I wasn't pregnant yet, but it still just hit me all wrong.

 

[Feisty Fidget]

Dodger I think that sometimes Mother's find it extremely hard to relate to us. They may claim that they 'understand' how we feel but in reality most can only see the positive aspects of our life (free to spend money, strong relationships with OH, freedom to do whatever whenever etc) and wonder why we are complaining and those that are really content with Motherhood just come across as patronising

Had a debate with a family member today about donating eggs - I stated it was something I was happy to do and she stated that although she likes the idea she would constantly worry about the life and welfare of that child. I tried explaining that perhaps due to the fact that we are so absorbed in infertility and the battles of others that my outlook is that it is only a positive thing to give someone the gift of a child but she just kind of gave me the "hmmmm" Which translates to 'only a Mother would understand'

Well bad news continues, bloody bike has now been stolen! Needed it to save on petrol and now I can't even afford a cheap second hand one

 

[dodgercpkl]

Yeah I think you are right on that FF. And ugh. I hate that condescending kind of attitude! I've had 36 years to get out and live and I have! I've traveled a ton and checked so many things off of my must do list. Sucks that she didn't really get to do that before kids, but I can't help it ya know?

Your post about donating eggs gave me goosebumps! I think that's a fantastic idea! And yeah, it's a part of you, but it's so very much a gift that you would potentially be giving someone else who wants it so very badly. I'm totally with you on this.

 

[urchin]

Morning me lovelies!

Sounds like there's a whole heap of fed up going on right now ... maybe the winter blues is mixing with the not-pregnant purples? Though of course it might not be winter for all of us - damn, there goes that theory!

Thinks are now starting to happen quickly for me: drugs will arrive next Saturday and I start injecting the Saturday after that. Then it will be 4-6 weeks before egg collection and poooooof! our savings will be gone. Hopefully to be replaced by something a lot more precious.

And so we continue with the house - the front bedroom is now plastered, today we will fill and sand any dips, then next weekend we paint (and the one after that lay some flooring and move into it) Ready to start on our bedroom after Christmas ... I have promised myself no more plastering this side of Christmas, but I might get itchy to do it once the room is stripped

I've ordered a new kitchen - it's from ebay but brand new ... and I've managed to get about £2.5k worth of kitchen for £500, which pleases me greatly as we'll be leaving it behind.

And I went to look at a house yesterday which I really liked. There's a fair bit of work to do on it (a couple of stud walls to take down and yet more plastering) But it's a lot of house for the money and has a decent sized garden.

It's a reposession, so if it's still on the market when we are ready to sell, we might be able to put a very cheeky offer in for it

Hope you all have a lovely Sunday xxx

 

[Feisty Fidget]

Oh Urchin you are such a busy little bee! I would be so upset that all of my hard work was being left behind for someone else to enjoy but you are already eyeing up the next big house project

Exciting news on the meds front hun Please keep us posted!

My Nan is coming out today Going to go down just after lunch to get her ready and then it is off home

And I had a glorious evening out yesterday night with some girlfriends! My weekend has certainly been a lot more awesome then my crappy week!

 

[urchin]

it's strange FF - doing up a house not to my own taste ... but neutral is the way to go for selling!

Hope you have lots of fun with your nan - sounds like a much better Sunday than mine

 

[wannabeprego]

Hi Girls,

@Urchin, i am so excited that you are going to be starting your meds to get prepared to start your IVF!!! I got everything crossed for you and am sending a boat load of baby dust your way!!!! I also wish you good luck with selling your house and getting the one that you really like!! It sounds like 2012 has alot of blessings in store for you hun!!!

@Fiesty, I am sorry you had a ruff week, but glad things got better and you are enjoying your weekend now!!!

AFM, I am going completly mad waiting on my BFP or AF to arrive. I track my periods online and it has averaged my cycles out at 27 days. So it is saying that my period could be 2 days late today. Here are my stats from the website, a quick copy and paste...LOL

Your last period was on October 29, 2011.


The number of periods you've entered into MyMonthlyCycles is 30.


Based on the periods you have stored in MyMonthlyCycles:
Your average menstrual cycle length is 27 days.

The longest cycle you have tracked was 32 days.

The shortest cycle you have tracked was 24 days.


But, I wont feel comfortable calling my period late until I make it past CD33 I think.... Every day is draggging by soooooooo sloooooooowly!!! As far as symptoms, I had soar nipples for like 5 days now, but today they dont seem as soar. I have been having light AF type cramps that come in waves, like right now I dont have any cramps at all, very odd indeed. DH swears my boobs look bigger and my nipples look bigger. I think my left boob looks more veiny, like there are a ton more dark blue veins, which i know is a good sign. But the right one looks the same i think.. i do feel like I have been peeing more lately, but that could just all be in my head at this point. Since I have only gotten faint lines on my HPT's and nothing definate yet, I feel like AF is just waiting to make her appaerance to get my hopes up... ugghhh..... I am supposed to use my last FRER on Thursday. I had DH hide it from me so I wouldnt use it before my AF was for sure late....

 

[wannabeprego]

And another positive sign is that my OPK's are pretty dark, even though I know they are negative, they are staying darker than what is normal for me during this part of my cycle, so it is one thing keeping me hopeful...

Here are my OPK's...

yesterdays...

https://i255.photobucket.com/albums/hh126/izzybee22/11-26.jpg

todays......

https://i255.photobucket.com/albums/hh126/izzybee22/11-27.jpg

 

[Feisty Fidget]

Wannabe I am counting on you to get that so soon after your HSG as it will give me hope for mine next month!

 

[Tasha16]

Thanks for ur support ladies i am feeling a little better now, i got my hospital appointment through and i'm there in the 22nd if december, also i had my first bloods done on friday and will have my cd21 bloods done on the 13th so at least that will b done before my appointment the down side is oh can't get in to take his sa sample untill jan so got a long wait for that xx I hioe u are all feeling better xx

 

[Rin731]

I feel you- had to see my 2.5 yr old nephew and 6 month old niece today at Thanksgiving.

Yeah I'm with you both on that. My niece (8) and nephew (3) were here yesterday and I love them to pieces but it just makes me even more crazy to have a child of my own. Then there's my SIL. I love her dearly but every 5 min she was saying things like "Are you sure you want one? I mean if you don't have one you don't have to deal with this". Ok. I'm not 5. I do know that having a child means going through rough times, pouts, crying, screaming etc. You just really aren't helping with your comment because YES! I do still want one. I'm very sure. Ugh.

MIL and DH's aunt, and my SIL, were all saying the same thing when my nephew had a meltdown.

 

[Feisty Fidget]

I feel you- had to see my 2.5 yr old nephew and 6 month old niece today at Thanksgiving.

Yeah I'm with you both on that. My niece (8) and nephew (3) were here yesterday and I love them to pieces but it just makes me even more crazy to have a child of my own. Then there's my SIL. I love her dearly but every 5 min she was saying things like "Are you sure you want one? I mean if you don't have one you don't have to deal with this". Ok. I'm not 5. I do know that having a child means going through rough times, pouts, crying, screaming etc. You just really aren't helping with your comment because YES! I do still want one. I'm very sure. Ugh.

MIL and DH's aunt, and my SIL, were all saying the same thing when my nephew had a meltdown.

It makes me even madder when BAD parents say it! Like they don't realise that the reason their little cherub acts like the spawn of hell is because they have no rules, boundaries or routine. Yep my children will occasionally play up but they will know the difference between what is acceptable and what isn't because I will make sure of it!

 

[wannabeprego]

Thanks for all of your support this month ladies but the got me!!! I had a feeling that something wasnt right when my tests never got any darker and all I got was those faint barely there lines. I never got a good definate line on a FRER either, so it was either all evaps or I had a chemical.

I am not taking it that hard this month though, because over my LTTC journey I am starting to develop a thick skin. I got a little teary eyed this morning but I quickly got myself back together and stopped. After all there is no sense in crying over spilled milk right?? I think i am going to take the month of December off from TTC altogether. I am going to push TTC on the back burner until my DH and I can afford to do our IUI which will hopefully be sometime early next year. I honestly think that if I was going to get pregnant without the help of a DR than it would of hapened on it's own by now. The sooner I accept this, the better off i will be for the time being and the less heart ache I will feel until we can do the IUI.

 

[dodgercpkl]

It makes me even madder when BAD parents say it! Like they don't realise that the reason their little cherub acts like the spawn of hell is because they have no rules, boundaries or routine. Yep my children will occasionally play up but they will know the difference between what is acceptable and what isn't because I will make sure of it!

Yeah it's definitely tougher when it's a parent that just doesn't care to discipline their child properly. I have to say that my SIL and my bro for that matter are really good with their kids. My nephew was having a bad day, but anytime he started getting bad, my SIL would stop him in his tracks with the threat (and follow through if needed) of a lost point. Well that and he's 2... and going through the terrible 2's. lol

I think the thing that frustrated me the most was that I know she went through a tough time getting pregnant with both of her kids, and I'd think she would know how it feels to have something like that said to her. Eek! I just thought of something... I am now remember just how many times my parents and I asked her if she was pregnant yet. Oi... I think her comment was maybe karmic justice. >.<