April Munchkins 2013- enjoying our wonderful babies!

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Liamsmom, I guess the problem is, that we really never had that feeling. I've never felt like his priority and same visa versa. :shrug:. But you are right... We need to get some "us time"!! Now, if I could only get this bleeding to stop :dohh:
I understand your issues with insurance!!! They are horrible, aren't they?? Glad you got it sorted out.. At least for now!
I don't have a toddler at home, but I used to teach special education kindergarten and agree with the boundaries! LO do so much better with rules to live by :thumbup:. Good for, getting Liam started on that.
And jake on a schedule?? Bless you. When I'm home, Grayson decides what our schedule should be :haha:

Candy, I'm sorry you got those news today. :hugs: nothing is set in stone yet though right?? Do you think William would physically harm the kids, or is he just neglectful (not that that is any better)? Would you feel better, if they would mandate the visits to be supervised by you? I don't know how the system works over there, but here, if they don't pay child support, they have no visitation right. Does he have to pay you?
I really hope things work themselves out for you!!! This is truly ridiculous! I feel so aweful for you and Shell!!!! Men can be such dickwads sometimes!!! You would think, that they would be equally as concerned about the CHILDREN'S needs, as you moms are!!!
 
Steph, as long as you are happy at the minute, and it sounds like you and Tob are enjoying having Grayson and being a family, that's all that matters for now. Whatever will happen in the future is the futures problem ;)
No idea what Isabelle wanted last night, other than vast amounts of food! She ate every time she woke (read that as "I stuck a boob in her mouth to kee her nice and quiet every time she woke") and seemed happy to doze off after that. :shrug: she's an enigma to me that little lady!!
All men must be the same. Simon gets up with Isabelle in the mornings so I can grab a few more minutes sleep. Twice he was off and I didn't get up until 9am and she was still in her jammies and he hadn't even changed her nappy (she was asleep...) by 9am I have her up, washed, dressed, and all our bits sorted for the day. Men just can't cope with baby plus other things!

Night changes: nope, I do it all at night. Like steph said, I would just be awake anyway, and since I ebf I have to be awake to feed her, so I'm up either way, so Simon doesn't need to be disturbed. I did make him do the 5.30 change last night as I was so exhausted, and he does now get up at 6.30ish with her each morning.

Liam's mom, I think it's great that you are working on the philosophy that some things just aren't ok with Liam. Like you say, at that age they are still trying to figure the world out, and I guess giving them those black and white the rules for some things makes that a bit easier for them. And your schedule with Jake is enviable. Between 11am and 7pm we have NO schedule at all. What Izzy wants...she gets!!

Candy :hugs: I can't believe they work on the philosophy of "we won't do anything to protect them until something happens to them" it's too fucking late then you idiots. How long are the visits for three times a year? Is it a few days when they stay with him all the time? Or is that all still to be worked out? Don't give up fighting momma, you have worked so hard to provide an amazing life for C&L and you should be so proud of yourself for that.

Afm: luckily an ok day. Phew! And after a good feed Isabelle went straight to sleep (and she wasnt quite asleep when she was put down, which means she self soothed :thumbup:)
She really made me laugh as when she is about to cry and get upset she sticks her bottom lip out. As I lowered her off my shoulder from being burped, about to go into her crib, she stuck the lip out and little tears were shining in her eyes! So she had another little cuddle before going in. She is so funny and pathetic sometimes!!!
 
ukgirl: That's super cute about Connie and asking for her massage. lol Kids are hilarous sometimes! I'm so sorry to hear the news though about the solicitor. There's still time for things to change though, and even if he gets awarded the 3 visits, it can always be over ruled if things don't go well. I know things aren't going the way you hoped, but you do an amazing job to keep those kids happy, healthy, and safe. You should be proud of that!

liams-mom: I used to work in a daycare in the 3 year old room (my FAVOURITE age!!) and kids that age are *absolutely* ready for rules and boundaries, as well as consequences when those rules are broken. That's great news that you've started some of that with Liam. Kids thrive when they know what's expected of them!! I don't want to wish Peter to grow up too fast, but I am super excited for him to get to that age.

doggylover: We have no semblance of a schedule either! I keep trying to sort something out, but it never goes the same two days in a row. :wacko: The one serious benefit of having to return to formula with a bottle this time is that Adam has now taken over the early morning feed which is usually around 5:00ish as a formula only feed. So I get a nice long strech of sleep, Adam gets to spend some time Peter and feed him, and he's up that early anyway to get ready for work!

Steph: Sorry to hear that you and Rob and having some troubles. I know what you mean about things feeling like a "friendship" though. I mean Adam and I are very much in love still, but we never have any time to ourselves, and certainly no 'intimacy' time. It makes things difficult, but I'm sure that once our Lo's get a better schedule and sleeps longer at night it'll be easier to have some alone time with our OH's.

Afm, I've been debating about when I want to move Peter into his own room to the big crib. Saturday he will be 6 weeks old and I'll be allowed to resume regular lifting etc. Part of the reason I'm debating about doing it sooner rather than later is that Peter normally sleeps swaddled or he flails all his limbs around and he gets them stuck between the craddle bars... so now that it's getting disgustingly hot here I won't be able to swaddle him anymore, and in the crib he'll have a lot more room to move around before he hits the bars on the edges. There's also a ceiling fan in his room which would certainly come in handy since we don't have air conditioning.

I know that people have very strong opinions about how long LO should stay with you in your room for, so I'm pretty torn about when to move him. :shrug: Before the un-expected section he was going to sleep in his own room right from the start.
 
Ready to mum I wish Anna would sleep in her cosleeper instead of in bed right up against me but I would really miss her if she were in her room. I think I would still get hardly any sleep as I would be creeping down the hallway all the time to make sure she was breathing. But I am a crazy woman so to each their own lol! Whatever you decide will be right for your family. Go with your instinct.

Candy that is bad news from the solicitor but don't let it make you feel like what you have already done has been for nothing. You have kept those two babies safe and loved all this time, that's not nothing- that's everything! And I know you are feeling stressed and sad etc right now but it will pass and you will find the strength to keep fighting, that is what women do!
 
And I keep meaning to say my dh has been amazing this whole time. Can't remember if I told you all that annelise has decided she can only be put to sleep by me and dh so he has been amazing. When he gets home from work he takes her most of the evening and at night he will do diaper changes so I don't have to get out of bed. I would not be surviving if not for him. I knew he would be a good daddy but he is actually amazing, amazing, amazing and I am counting my blessings that I have him!
 
Im waiting for the child guardian to give more detail on the type of contact she recommends but Im going to fight it. I know him and I know my kids and Im not going to let one or both of them end up murdered or missing until they stop treating them as another pair of children to push throuh their system. Im so worried about their health and safety its ridiculous. Its unfair on Connie and Lucas to be put at risk. He has been abusive to Connie and Ive witnessed how it affected her. I ran with them when she was almost three. She would curl in a ball and lay there completely silent and still if she was scared. She would only play by herself in the corner and she would never be noisy. I fixed her when we moved back and now she is a normal seven year old girl. She still has issues with sudden loud noises and get stressed over small stuff now and then but its miles better for her now. Lucas grew up a normal noisey social little boy. Im so scared he's going to bring Connie back down and ruin Lucas in the process too. Child Services are meant to protect kids.. so he doesnt hit them but the mental stuff is just as bad possibly worse. Im going to fight for them even if it bankrupts us. I have to.
He pays child maintenece but only because he is ordered to by the norwegian government and if he refuses to pay they take it from his bank.

Steph I agree with Sarah about taking it as it comes and not worrying about the future. Me and Aaron have been off lately it feels awful to feel like he has pulled away a bit and I cant do anything to bring him back but I know if I highlight the issues too much with him it makes things work. So Im trying to focus on the positives and see if that helps us xx

Sarah Benny does the whole sad face thing too lately.. It breaks my heart lol. He gets extda boob and ciddles when he does it too haha. These babies know what to do!! xx

Reqdytomum I say if you feel like moving him would be beneficial to you all then do it. As long as you can hear him when he wakes up or cries then its fine. Dont worry about what othes would do or think this is you and Peter and you do what works for you. Parenting is a minefeild of you shoukds and shouldnts and so many debated topics. Im sure Peter would love the cool breeze of the ceiling fan on a hot night and the extra wiggle room xx

Kristabelle that is great about your OH! xxx
 
ReadytoMum: Thank you for mommy moral support! We actually had a great day yesterday. I tend to thrive when Liam is thriving, he's been with me for 3 years and we've always been close and I intend to try to remain as close as I feel I can through his formative years. He seems to be enjoying the fact that he knows what he can and cannot do in the house and he's been less aggressive and testy since we gave him "rules". I'm very proud of how quickly he seems to be getting the hang of it. I feel like a horrid parent when I'd see him being naughty, but then I realized that yelling at him to stop didn't really make sense without there being some kind of rule as to why. How would he know how to stop if I didn't make it clear? Kid isn't a mind reader! :dohh: The things we miss when we're close to our kids..
I think it sounds like Peter would be fine in his own room being squirmy in a big boy crib with his own fan :thumbup: We co-slept with Liam for the first two weeks until we couldn't stand having his sleeper in our room because it took up too much space :blush: and Jake was so big to start that we just popped him in his crib straight away. We use a snuggle nest until they don't fit, just to get them trained on how to sleep in their crib and then we let them manage on their own. :flower: Seems to have worked well for them so far!

Candy: I'm so sorry about your ex and how things are turning out with the courts. I haven't had to deal with an abusive ex partner so I can't say I know how you're feeling, but I do understand feeling like you're being backed into a corner and that you absolutely have to fight. These are your babies and they can't do it for themselves and its so brave of you to be there for them instead of running scared. A lot of women here in the states just take the abuse, figuring they deserve it..and then..there are people like my aunt that beat the crap right out of the guy that tried to abuse her..I think she may have even been arrested but the guy got the worse end of the stick in the long run. :shrug: My family deserves a WHOLE 'nother message board! LoL

DL: Jake does "the lip" too! Liam had done it practically since his birth and they look so similar when the lip comes out. Its usually out only when I have to pull him away from the boob to bring up a burp, but its definitely there. He's even had the tears in his eyes a few times for me. Cheeky little monkey! :haha:

AFM: I have been sitting here for almost a half hour waiting to hear from Jake. Its near 5:30am right now and he's been down since 10pm! We had a fairly late night, not getting home from the park and shopping until 8 which is his normal bedtime - so it took him a few "boobs" to settle into his rhythm. :winkwink: I just had to pump out one boob and put it in the freezer! We're going to try and take Liam out to see Epic today while mom watches the little one who will hopefully be asleep for his afternoon nap while we're gone. I'm excited to do something fun like this with Liam. He loves the Ice Age movies, so I'm hoping he'll enjoy this one as well and there doesn't seem to be any major violence in said child's cartoon. :haha: Oh and I have my 6 week post baby check today! Woot! Going to talk about having Mirena put in one more time and in 5 years we'll probably be ready to "tie the knot" or cut it, whichever one of us decides to have the procedure. :haha: Ok ladies, I'm going to have to run and go stare at Jake's video feed to believe that he's still sleeping! Love to you all xx
 
Liamsmom Isabelle slept so long last night I ad to get up and pump too!! Damn kids :haha:

Candy :hugs: is really all I can say. I can't imagine how hard it must have been or you and connie, and how hard it is again now. But you know that we're all here to support you, for whatever that's worth.

Readytomum: if you feel happy putting Peter in his room then go for it! If you were planning on doing that from birth anyway then he's gotten an extra treat all this time ;) as long as you are happy, it doesn't matter what the books/other people say! We haven't yet just because I'm far to lazy to walk to the next room to feed her! Especially since she's still feeding at least twice a night!

Afm: Isabelle slept until 5am! She didn't go fully to sleep until 9.45pm, which is an hour later than normal, but that's still 7hrs and 15mins! My boobs were insane of course :haha: and since she only ate from one and went back to sleep I had to get up and pump the other (well I didn't HAVE to, but I did as I am always eager to build up the freeze stash of milk!) then of course I had to let the dogs out and feed them...so I didn't get back to sleep until 6am...and she was up again at 6.30!

Simon takes her downstairs in the morning, and both yesterday and today she has SCREAMED for him. He is very upset!
 
Last night must have been the magical night of baby sleeping--Peter did a 4 hour strech, then a 3 hour stretch!! Lately he's been waking up every 2 hours, so this was a very welcome change! :happydance: He actually slept so well that DH missed out getting to feed him this morning because Peter was still sleeping when he had to leave for work.
 
Wow 7 hours of sleep?!?!? I'm in awe!!! We are still holding strong with 3 to 4 lmao! We had our 2 month check up yesterday and Grayson weighed in at 13.8 lbs :shock:. He looks great though and the pediatrician said to continue whatever we are doing, since it seems to be working!
He did get 5 shots yesterday (vaccines) :cry: and poor baby was crying. It broke my heart! Thank god, he had no fever or pains through the night. He is wake up at 3am screaming (which he NEVER does), so I shoved a boob in his face! Thank god that boob still seems to be the universal "fixer" of all his problems :haha:.

ReadytoMum, don't worry about what everyone else thinks... Do what feels right for you!!!! :flower:. One thing I've learned: if you ask 50 people about parenting, you get 50 different answers :wacko:. This goes for te outside world of course, and not our BnB circle :cloud9:
 
Candy, when will you did out more?? I really hope they change their mind, so you don't have to fight them! An of course I hope Aaron steps in, to support you!
I know 100% what your saying, about talking to him about issues! I feel like Rob shuts down more, when I try to talk to him. So I end up walking on eggshells for a day or so (totally not my normal style, but I'm just too tired to fight right now). This seemed to work for us this time, because he has been wonderful these last few days :thumbup:.
 
liams_mom I fought back at my ex and that is why he's ruining my life now, he's pissed big time and as all ways if you piss him off he'll make sure he gets you back for it. I used his computer once without asking and he threw it at me saying I had to learn that my actions have consequences, he told that to the social worker, that I need to learn how to behave so he has to punish me, she called him sick. I'm glad your aunt got away too, I stayed my him for 5 years because he took everyone away from me and made me feel like I was disgusting so no one else would want me, I wasn't allowed friends or to go out without him, I had to wear his clothes and not allowed to cut my hair or wear make up, he was really controlling and sick. It took a lot for me to leave, I remember feeling sick with fear and guilt when our plane was taking off but I felt relief too. Too many women get bashed for staying with men who abuse them but they are brainwashed to believe they deserve it so they are too scared to leave. Its sad. I want to shake those women and say that they are worth more lol.

:hugs: thanks Sarah :) I feel better having you ladies to talk to about it. xxx

I have to say I love the feeling when my boob is rock hard and Benny eats from it, it's like needing a massive wee for ages and suddenly going haha!!
 
I'm glad things are looking up Steph I hope things continue to get better! in case they don't though, just have really dirty sex, that fixes everything hahahaha :P
I got the report through today she's basing her decision for unsupervised contact on the 2 hours a day for 3 days he had last time he came so I've written to her my comments.
 
Steph82 said:
this goes for te outside world of course, and not our BnB circle :cloud9:
Click to expand...

Too true!! :thumbup:

Candy I can't relieve he said that to a social worker, about you needing to learn about consequences, and they still think he's sane enough to be allowed near children....
 
yup I know... it's all about statistics and getting children through the system, look at those kids who got murdered by their father in France, she fought tooth and nail and he got unsupervised contact and killed them to ruin her life. Same with a man who lived near my dad, he killed himself and his 4 year old son during his visitation because he couldn't cope with the divorce and my ex is hell bent on revenge.
 
So this is off topic, but rather amusing:

Grayson was looking for some boob comfort when I got home from work today, so I threw him in the Moby wrap (at boob hight) and let him comfort suck, while I did some cleaning. Shortly after he got settled in, he made the biggest poop and passed out. Well, it was around lunch time, so I ate my sandwich and finished it off with an ice cream cone :blush:. By the time I was done, I looked down at Grayson's head and saw that he was COVERED in crumbs :haha:. The poor kid looked like the floor of a bird cage ahaha... Crumbs everywhere... And he continued to sleep very contently, with his cheek mashed up to my boob :rofl:
 
He can eat in the wrap? That's impressive, I think that kid loves boob even more than Isabelle.

And that is saying something!
 
Bwahahah I swear this kid is like a pig looking for truffles!! If there is a boob within 5 ft, he will find it and latch onto it :rofl:
 
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