Are you going to spoil your child?

[vaniilla]

I think there's a big difference from spoiling your child and being 'spoilt' if that makes any sense I want to get lo whatever he wants when he's older but I want to appreciate it as well and feel like he's earned what he has and not feel like he just has to click his heels twice to get things

 

[cherryglitter]

i know of a child who is very spoilt. he appreciates nothing at all! it really makes me upset actually because i wonder how he's going to cope when he's older.

i already feel under pressure to get jake this that and the other for christmas but i won't succumb to it.

i worry everyday because i don't want him to grow up thinking he has a right to things.

 

[kandbumpx]

What I mean by spoilt is kids that get everything they ask for and then if one time they don't get it they throw a massive tantrum. Also the ones that don't appreciate anything you buy them

 

[JASMAK]

My kids get allowance and they have to save up to buy most toys unless of course, it's Christmas or their birthdays. I give them big birthday parties though...whatever they want usually..which can cost about $400-$500. I buy them some name brand clothing, but not alot. They get a couple things. That has alot to do with my income too though, I can't afford all name brand. But I do recognize that those who don't have name brands are probably going to be teased (there is no uniforms for school here). I don't think you can spoil with love and affection, so I give as much as I can. I always think about 'spoiling' as material things..and I certainly try to teach my children about giving, being grateful, and educate them about those who have less...and much less. A good example is my ex- step dad remarried to a woman in Uganda. They have three children there...and that is a poor that we can all read about, but it is unimaginable for anyone unless you have been there...but I love to hear my step-dads stories (I still consider him to be my stepdad) even though some of them are heartwrenching...and I teach my kids about it too...it's a good educational lesson.

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

I just want to say mine do appreciate stuff lol.

 

[sabby52]

Mine quite often do get what they want, but they are not spoilt and they appreciate everything they get. I like them to have nice things and hate the thought of them wanting something and not being able to have it, but they do get pocket money as well and if they really, really want something, sometimes I will let them use some of their money and I put the rest to it, just so they know they arent going to get everything without helping out now and again

 

[Hayley90]

it is possible to be well behaved/polite and get a lot of things. i hate the term spoilt, as it implies that they are somehow 'ruined' for having new things etc. Harrison has loads of stuff all the time, but he isnt 'spoilt' by it.

 

[cherryglitter]

i think it's more when they get to a certain age and they start asking/wanting for things.

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

it is possible to be well behaved/polite and get a lot of things. i hate the term spoilt, as it implies that they are somehow 'ruined' for having new things etc. Harrison has loads of stuff all the time, but he isnt 'spoilt' by it.

Thats a good way to explain it. I dont think it automaticly makes them horrible or demanding at all

 

[sophxx]

My lo has a lot and to others would prob say we spoil him he has all designer clothes gucci shoes ect. He has a iPod touch and is getting A leap pad but he's very careful with his things he never throws them he puts the all down carefully and always brings his water proofs go put over his clothes of he wants to play outside in the mud. I had everything as a child but wasbt spoilt I appetite everything I got and understand my prents worked very hard for it x

 

[cherryglitter]

it is possible to be well behaved/polite and get a lot of things. i hate the term spoilt, as it implies that they are somehow 'ruined' for having new things etc. Harrison has loads of stuff all the time, but he isnt 'spoilt' by it.

Thats a good way to explain it. I dont think it automaticly makes them horrible or demanding at all

ah no way. it's all about balance.

 

[JASMAK]

I don't think having lots makes them spoiled. I think 'expecting' lots is a child acting spoiled.

 

[Eternal]

My son gets a lot, my mother spends loads on him and so do we, even though my husband is really against spoiling him he does too lol!

if we are out and he wants something and has a tantrum he doesn't get it! simple as. he really doesn't get the whole talking it away to pay for it bit, but then he is only 22 months.

we are strict, we expect him to behave esp as he gets older, and he wont get if he is naughty, i don't agree with saying, if you do that again you wont get it and then still letting them have it.

So my child does have a lot of material things, we spent a few over a thousand pounds on his bedroom furniture lol.

 

[leahsbabybump]

i was spoilt rotten when i was a kid and now i realise how much a pain i must have been to my parents they only had one wage to support the three of us and i would still get the best trainers or shoes :-/ i think i will get my kids treats when they have been good or summat like you say i wont spoil them for nothing its done me no favours in adult life i still go off wanting everything all time n its no good so no i wont spoil my kids rotten they need to know you have to earn nice things iykwim

 

[kandbumpx]

i was spoilt rotten when i was a kid and now i realise how much a pain i must have been to my parents they only had one wage to support the three of us and i would still get the best trainers or shoes :-/ i think i will get my kids treats when they have been good or summat like you say i wont spoil them for nothing its done me no favours in adult life i still go off wanting everything all time n its no good so no i wont spoil my kids rotten they need to know you have to earn nice things iykwim

Yup I agree. And haha I know what you mean with being spolit.. I wasn't by my mum, but when I was younger with my dad - It was 'Katie wants Katie gets' iykwim lol. But then that soon changed and I still do wish I could have everything now I want now but I can't haha - But then again who doesn't want everything they want lol

 

[leahsbabybump]

i drive dave mad lol he says im allways wanting wanting bloody wanting lol :-/

 

[TaylorsMummyx]

Same here, I was very spolit, mum would take me clothes shopping every weekend! Oh god i loved it! Tbh I still get alot and proba more thn I should get and it should be spent on kids but they don't go without

 

[Lauren25]

When hes old enough to understand if he really wants something or theres something hes really into ill let him 'earn it' say by helping me do something round the house etc. I will never just give him something other than birthdays and christmas!!

When i was growing up i didnt get anything throughout the year other than clothes and shoes only when needed, i wouldnt randomly get a toy or couldnt earn something special. But then OH got the best of everything when he was growing up and even though he denies it i know when they wanted something they got it (they still do at this age haha) so i want to get a happy medium with LO

 

[lhancock90]

Its upsetting that the idea of spoiling my daughter would make people think she was a horrible child who didn't appriciate money etc.
She will be disciplined and i will teach her to appriciate the things she has, expect her to help with chores and get herself a little part time job but as parents, we reserve the right to spoil our kids if we want to, as long as they are well behaved it does no harm!