Be honest with me please

[cowboys angel]

Alright quick introduction. My name is Katie. I have a 2 month old and a 7 year old. I normally am over in baby club, but this actually has nothing to do with my biological daughter Elizabeth (2 months), and more to do with my step daughter Evie (7 years).

I need to know if I'm wrong in being irritated at Evie. We only have her every Wednesday for a few hours, and every other weekend Thursday to Sunday, so when our laundry didn't dry all the way (we had a three weekend stretch without her due to holiday), we just laid it out in her room instead of paying for more dryer time. This part is my fault, I totally spaced (baby brain!) and forgot to take care of it.

When she was here this past Wednesday, she had a friend over. The rule is, they can play with whatever they want, but it will be put away before she goes back to her mothers. When she took her friend home (we live in the same apartment building), she told us, when she got back, that her room was picked up. We asked if she was sure, she said yes. I asked what if I go look. She said she'd go make sure. She came back and said 'yes mommy, everything's taken care of.' I said okay.

We had only minutes before we took her back, and it just never occurred to me to go check her room. She's usually very good about picking up her room.

By the way, she was told she could use the crib for her baby dolls (and only her baby dolls) until the baby was using it.

I just remembered about the laundry when some of Elizabeth's clothes were missing, and went to pick it up. She had taken all the clean clothes and thrown them in the crib (baby currently sleeps in bassinet), on the floor, toys everywhere, etc.

I took all the clothes out and took care of them, threw all her toys that she left out and threw them in the center of her bedroom for her to take care of, and she has now lost the right to use the crib.

Am I wrong? Wrong in being irritated and wrong in what I did/decided? I'm still adjusting to this whole 'mommy thing' haha

 

[Weeplin]

What were the clothes laid out on? If it was an airer and she has taken clean clothes off it and then thrown them in the crib I would say that is pretty naughty as she shouldn't be touching them at all or she should of at least came and asked you what to do if they were in the way. Saying that from experience (I have a 7 year old girl too) children that age don't always think like that yet, she is still a little girl and such young children can have a very odd definition of what is tidy and if she has never had this situation before it is most likely that she just didn't think and was excited playing with her friend.

Personally I would put it down to a one off and if she was to do it again then limit her use of the crib for her dolls. Give her a warning and let her know again what you expect of her when tidying but please remember to put yourself in her shoes and remember she does not think like you. When my daughter tidies she does a good job with the floor, I get her to make her bed every morning, doirty laundry goes in basket BUT I don't expect she will know how to neatly sort out her books and dvds or any of the finer little things. I show her that and get her to help so she still learns.

You're not wrong in being irritated by it, I would be. She said she had tidied when she obviously had not. I think you have done right by throwing her toys in the middle of the floor for her to put back properly but like I said I just don't think she would have thought about the laundry and I feel that a warning would suffice and then stop her if she does it again.

I hope you get it sorted hon, and I hope this makes sense! It's first thing in the morning and normally I just browse but didn't want to R&R!

x

 

[princessellie]

hmm yeh im inclined to agree with weeplin, give her a warning first, just say i asked you to clean your room before you went home last wek and you left all of these toys out, and you messed about with my washing which is naughty, i dont want you to do it again, then if she does do it again then stop her using the cot x

 

[cowboys angel]

Alright, after I calmed down, my thoughts were along both of you ladies'. Telling her I am disappointed in her, and upset that she lied to me about picking up her clothes, and explaining why the laundry was there and telling her that it was naughty of her to mess with it, when she's not sure about something she needs to ask, would be enough for her.

Thanks for understanding, and responding!

 

[Weeplin]

Glad you got it sorted hon! x