being told the truth

[marley2580]

Do you feel that you were told the truth about how difficult breastfeeding actually is? I don't think that they tell you just how bloody difficult it is for the first couple of months, I've had a hellish time and it's only just starting to settle down now. I think that if they are going to promote BF they should tell the truth and be much more supportive when you encounter difficulties.

 

[coccyx]

Sorry you have had a tough time and well done for keeping going. I only found the first week or so difficult, but loved breastfeeding my 3.Think caring for a newborn is difficult whether breast or bottle fed.

 

[ablaze]

i found i was told the truth , initially with chloe I didnt want to brestfeed, but with her being in scbu i really wanted to, i was told it would be really hard as id be expressing all my feeds, but letting her suckle me(she was tube fed)

i had great support too

 

[Kina]

I wasn't told how difficult it was, nor what problems to potentially expect. I also didn't realise it was normal for breastfed babies to feed frequently, as I had only been around babies that had been formula fed 4 hourly before. It was a shock!! But I'm so glad we persevered and I feel proud that I managed to breastfeed DD for as long as I did despite the poor support and troubles we went through in the beginning, we learnt together!

 

[beanie]

No,I was led to believe that breastfeeding is natural and that you know what to do. Imagine my shock when Seren arrived and did not behave like I thouhgt she would - she fed constantly, was like suckling a dyson, would feed for up to 40 mins a time and then ask for more half an hour later. I really did feel like a failure for the first 4 months and it really affected my confidence. However luckily I got some great online support from my friends and that along with being a right stubborn cow meant I was ableto acrry on.

I think people should be made aware of the realities. Perhaps it might put somepeople off, but I do believe that it would also stop people from believing they can't produce eough milk, or baby isn't satisfied etc etc

 

[mickey]

no, I wasn't told at all and didn't expect it to be so difficult! that is why I thought it will be of help to have an extra section for breastfeeding!

I did not have problems with Juleika latching on, but in the beginning it took up all my energy and it was incredibly tiring for me! it felt like Juleika sucks all of my energy out of my body! not to mention that you are exhausted from giving birth in the beginning and the healing takes a bit as well!

firstly, Juleika also wanted to be fed constantly and I had the impression this will never stop!

sometimes I was really tempted to throw all my endurance over board and just ask OH to get some formula...

but luckily, all the extra preparation which comes with bottle feeding - expecially making up a bottle at night - put me off.

so, I kept on going. and now it settles, Juleika doesn't want to be on the breast constantly anymore and I am gaining confidence with breastfeeding in front of other people!

I only can say, I find the first couple of weeks are really hard work, but finally it pays off as I find it is the best experience in the world to have your baby so close. it makes my heart jump when I see her there, suckling happily

 

[cari28]

I'm sorry that you had difficulty in the beginning. I commend you for sticking with it. The lactation consultant should have worked with you longer in the hospital (if there was one available where you delivered) to make sure you were comfortable with the process.

 

[mickey]

I'm sorry that you had difficulty in the beginning. I commend you for sticking with it. The lactation consultant should have worked with you longer in the hospital (if there was one available where you delivered) to make sure you were comfortable with the process.

possibly you get more support in US, but here, in the hospital were I was, only the midwifes were there to help you and at one point I was asking for help and the nurses replied, there is nobody here at the moment who can help me

 

[beanie]

I got very little support in the hospital, was given a leaflet and shown how to latch her on the first time but that was it. They made me feel like a failure, saying to me "it shouldn't be hurting" when it was, saying they wouldmn't let me go home unless I had it sorted and when I did ask for formula they wouldn't let me feed my own baby. Not a great start. I am really passionate about getting more support to mums as the midwives are so busy. I volunteer as a peer support counseller for my local breastfeeding group and there was talk about trying to get volunteers into the hospitals so they could help new mums breastfeed but it hasn't taken off due to all the security checks, etc etc

 

[putzgirl]

Sorry you all had such a hard time and didn't get the full story. I was told exactly how hard it would be but I really didn't become comfortable with it til I got home from the hospital.

 

[anita665]

I don't think they want to tell you because they're so keen for you to do it and they don't want to put you off. Still more people would maybe stick at it if they had more help and support whilest trying.

This is my first so I don't know but I know my friend gave up very quickly. I'm very determined though so plan to do everything I can to stick at it.

Don't look forward to OH's oppinion on it all though as I know he won't understand if I find it hard. Do many of you find that your partners just expect it to be easy - like how hard can it be!

 

[Helen]

I think the thing they don't tell you is how hard it is to stop. I think I was prepared for things to be difficult to get going and that it would hurt initially. No-one actually said it was difficult to stop though.

I've been able to persuade Charlotte to take a bottle with formula in, but Tom will just not have it. I've tried different bottles, different formula, talking to him, not talking to him, different positions, starving him of milk, but he's just not having it.

Now that he's older (thankfully with no teeth yet) he's really quite rough, pulling and biting. Ouch!

 

[Lucy]

Yes I agree I had no idea how difficult bfing would be and I really don't think the professionals are trained enough - most of them couldn't answer my questions.

Helen - have you tried giving Tom the formula from a beaker or a cup? Is it the bottle he wont take or the formula or the combination of both?

 

[Helen]

Helen - have you tried giving Tom the formula from a beaker or a cup? Is it the bottle he wont take or the formula or the combination of both?

Yeah I've tried 3 different kinds of baby cup and a tea cup! No joy! Going to have another go with the carton milk in the next couple of days rather than the powdered stuff and see if that helps.

He doesn't seem to like the taste, yet if it's on breakfast cereal or in his meals he's ok with it. He used to take a bottle of expressed milk from 6 weeks old until we dropped the late feed before Christmas.

 

[Lucy]

Helen, have you tried mixing formula with expressed milk and gradually changing the quantities so eventually it's 100% formula? Sorry , just trying to think of all the tips to try that I've heard. Does your little girl bat an eye lid when she sees Tom feeding from you?

 

[Linzi]

Ive been told about the pain and bleeding and things like that but obviously Ive never tried it yet so I dont know. People certainly haven't been telling me its easy though. I just hope its no worse than theyre telling me.

xxx

 

[mickey]

I didn't experience any pain (except slight pain when we had the trush) or bleeding, but I found it/find it physically hard work

now we have 4.3 kg's already - and that on the other hand - makes me feel sooooo proud

 

[Tezzy]

i was definetly not given the support or the information i needed to breastfeed. my mw was crap and so was my hv.

 

[Helen]

Helen, have you tried mixing formula with expressed milk and gradually changing the quantities so eventually it's 100% formula? Sorry , just trying to think of all the tips to try that I've heard. Does your little girl bat an eye lid when she sees Tom feeding from you?

Yeah tried that a few months ago when we were still doing the late feed. No joy. TBH I'll do anything to avoid having to start pumping again.

Charlotte was pretty upset at first having to have a bottle, but she's absolutely fine with it now and I know that DH loves feeding her and having their special cuddles. I just wish I could persuade Tom it's a good idea.

We've tried a different bottle the last couple of days and he's taking around 1/2 oz -1 oz from it so I'm hoping this is the start of something good. Fingers crossed!

 

[Lucy]

Sounds promising Helen!