Breastfeeding in public

[midori1999]

If you don't feel comfortable feeding in public, or want to cover up, then do so. That is your right. I'm not going to pretend I don't think it's a shame that pure society makes women feel that way, but it's still your right.

For those who want to feed in public, it's very unlikely that anyone will say anything to you. I have been breast feeding my daughter anywhere and everywhere since she was born and she is now 20 months. I still feed her in public and intend to do so as long as she asks me to, even if that is until she is 5,6 or 7. I've fed walking round the supermarket, at the checkout, at the zoo, at soft play, during vaccinations, on a plane, on the beach in Mexico, in Walmart, in church. There is no where I could take my daughter that I won't breast feed and I never cover up and I just feed her in the easiest way possible, I don't particularly try and be discreet.

In short, Pink has it right when she says 'its natural, it's normal and it's a comfort to my child and I don't give a s**t what you think'

 

[CatherineK]

What Midori1999 said!

 

[CordeliaJ]

You have to remember though that it's not always 'society' that makes us 'feel like we need to cover up'. Some of us just choose to because we ourselves feel more comfortable that way. I don't think it's a shame at all, I wouldn't say to any woman "it's a shame you want to get your breasts out to feed in public" and you shouldn't say that to anyone who doesn't want to either. Both ways are fine, you have to learn to be ok with other people's choices.

 

[DLA]

You have to remember though that it's not always 'society' that makes us 'feel like we need to cover up'. Some of us just choose to because we ourselves feel more comfortable that way. I don't think it's a shame at all, I wouldn't say to any woman "it's a shame you want to get your breasts out to feed in public" and you shouldn't say that to anyone who doesn't want to either. Both ways are fine, you have to learn to be ok with other people's choices.

That's a good point. I didn't feel comfortable BFing in public, but it wasn't because of anyone else or society's view on BFing. I'm just extremely self conscious when it comes to my body. My boobs are here to feed my child but they are still MY boobs and I have my own feelings about that. You want to BF in public? More power to you! Doesn't bother me in the slightest but it's just not for me.

 

[midori1999]

You have to remember though that it's not always 'society' that makes us 'feel like we need to cover up'. Some of us just choose to because we ourselves feel more comfortable that way. I don't think it's a shame at all, I wouldn't say to any woman "it's a shame you want to get your breasts out to feed in public" and you shouldn't say that to anyone who doesn't want to either. Both ways are fine, you have to learn to be ok with other people's choices.

Whether you are conscious of it or not, of course it is society that makes you feel that your breasts should be covered up. Do you think you'd still feel the same way if you had been born and brought up in a culture where all women go topless all the time?

I am fine with anyone's choices about whether they cover up or not, I would never tell another nursing mother what she should or shouldn't do. However, I'm entitled to my own personal feelings about that too.

 

[CatherineK]

I think while many of us feel so strongly about breastfeeding in public is simple- the more people that do it, the more people will be comfortable with it, which will allow more to feel comfortable to do it, and so on. Self consciousness about our breasts is something that society had placed on us. I mean, really, why is it perfectly acceptable for a man to expose his nipples, but not a woman?

 

[DLA]

For me personally it's less about the right to exposing my breast and more about the fact that I hate my body and don't want other's to see it. Can't argue that there's not a negative stigma with BFing in public, there certainly is. That is annoying and ignorant in my opinion. But for me, it feels more like a separate issue than that.

 

[CordeliaJ]

You can't state matter of fact that it is society, perhaps for some it is, but for others it's not. See this is what I'm talking about, you just make assumptions without even knowing what you're saying. So because I live in the UK you assume I was brought up here and you assume it is society. I'm from the Netherlands and women are far more open there and we have many nude/topless beaches etc. For me, it is not society, this is just how I feel about MY body, not anyone else's. You have to accept others choices, this constant battle about 'if more women did it..' etc is pointless because we all feel differently. Even if every single woman around me was doing it, that doesn't mean I will automatically want to do it as well.

 

[midori1999]

You can't state matter of fact that it is society, perhaps for some it is, but for others it's not. See this is what I'm talking about, you just make assumptions without even knowing what you're saying. So because I live in the UK you assume I was brought up here and you assume it is society. I'm from the Netherlands and women are far more open there and we have many nude/topless beaches etc. For me, it is not society, this is just how I feel about MY body, not anyone else's. You have to accept others choices, this constant battle about 'if more women did it..' etc is pointless because we all feel differently. Even if every single woman around me was doing it, that doesn't mean I will automatically want to do it as well.

So are you saying that in cultures where women are topless all the time (I'm not talking about topless beaches here) and there is little or no media, that women feel negatively about their bodies or would worry about people seeing their bodies, worry about walking around topless all the time or that they worry about breast feeding in public?

 

[CordeliaJ]

You can't state matter of fact that it is society, perhaps for some it is, but for others it's not. See this is what I'm talking about, you just make assumptions without even knowing what you're saying. So because I live in the UK you assume I was brought up here and you assume it is society. I'm from the Netherlands and women are far more open there and we have many nude/topless beaches etc. For me, it is not society, this is just how I feel about MY body, not anyone else's. You have to accept others choices, this constant battle about 'if more women did it..' etc is pointless because we all feel differently. Even if every single woman around me was doing it, that doesn't mean I will automatically want to do it as well.

So are you saying that in cultures where women are topless all the time (I'm not talking about topless beaches here) and there is little or no media, that women feel negatively about their bodies or would worry about people seeing their bodies, worry about walking around topless all the time or that they worry about breast feeding in public?

No, I wouldn't have a clue about cultures I've never experienced. I was specifically speaking about the culture I was brought up in. I can only speak for myself, and I keep saying there will be different reasons for different people, but for me, yes it is my own personal preference, not because I've been brought up in a particular environment, but because that's what feels comfortable for me.

 

[Dk1234]

I mean that irrelevant because this is the culture we live in. Regardless what it is that makes some people uncomfortable about nip, it doesn't mean that emotion is sad or ridiculous. People are aloud to feel however they want

 

[qpaulina42]

Figures this topic would start a bit of hoopla....

I breastfed (and still do while being rather pregnant looking now) in public on principle, even at times when I felt a bit awkward about it. These are my principles and priorities however, so while I try to stand up for them I expect others to stand up for theirs (complete with dirty looks, and harsh words, and lots of family drama etc etc). We all just do what we feel is right...

Anyway, to your original question, I am sure you'll find a way to cover up (or not) that you will feel comfortable with. Something like a light swaddle blanket (muslins perhaps they are called in the UK?) would probably work well. I wouldn't necessarily invest in a whole contraption before I was sure what I needed/wanted.

 

[Dk1234]

I agree, a blanket works way better than my nursing cover. It's too much trouble, super cute but a lot of trouble

 

[iwantabub]

I agree with cordelia. .. its more of a personal preferance than a society thing for me...

As one previous poster said.. yes boobs are for bfing but theyre still MY boobs and that means im not comfortable with people seeing them.

I dont want to lose my sexuality either.. I dont wanna feel like my only purpose is to be a walking milk making machine. ...
(Not sayin bfing women arent sexy jist how I feel as im self concious)

If I start thinking like that then I will feel less sexy and then I will struggle to be sexy with dh coz I just feel like a walking udder instead of a sexual woman...

Mybiggest fear is that child birth and bfing and all that stufd will make me forget or lose my sexual part of me... and exposing nip in public makes me not feel that way. It makes it less special for me I guess

 

[Babyduo]

I have bf all of mine and many times no one knows I'm doing it Modesty is important to me but I have fed everywhere from church to a shopping mall. I usually cover up with a light blanket while latching on and then if needed uncover the majority of the head so they don't get too hot.

 

[qpaulina42]

Mybiggest fear is that child birth and bfing and all that stufd will make me forget or lose my sexual part of me... and exposing nip in public makes me not feel that way. It makes it less special for me I guess

There may be some truth to that, though I think the biggest problem with my feelings of sexiness is the really low libido, which may or may not come from the breastfeeding and now pregnancy (which has done it in really. Dead, I tell you!) And childbirth, though an interesting experience did rearrange me so much I am STILL not comfortable with my new body, and now I'll have to birth another. Sigh. Anyway, I'm told I have an unusually bad case of prolapse so don't start worrying more because of what I said. I think the important thing is that covered up or not your babies will be getting some breast milk, which is already a wonderful thing!

 

[Equreuil]

Most stores, malls, and restaurants either have a little lounge/seating area by the women's restrooms where you can go, if not a complete "family" restroom. I would say invest in a nursing apron, or a nice lightweight shawl or blanket you can drape over yourself while breastfeeding.

Or there's breastpumps. Make sure you have a couple bottles worth ready to take with you for when you go out. Obviously, breastfeed the rest of the time, but for those times you're out and about and have no where comfortable to go to feed baby.

This is my plan, at least. Like OP said, I have no intention of being housebound for months while in the bf stage, but I'm not the type to just whip out my boob and feed in public (and I've known women who do).

 

[Whimsy82]

Okay, I'll throw in my two cents

I will be breast feeding as well but I'm not comfortable doing it in public. When I see other women doing it, I don't mind. It doesn't bother me at all. It's just my choice.

It's a choice, I suppose. Kind of like the choice to breast feed in the first place. Just do what you're comfortable with!

 

[pinklightbulb]

I'm in Australia and NIP everywhere I went with both boys. I really don't think it's the country you're in, it's just how you feel personally on the topic that forms your opinion of BF in public.

 

[qpaulina42]

what's nip?