Can depression hurt my baby?

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - Second Trimester' started by Vanilla_girl, Jun 7, 2011.

  1. Vanilla_girl

    Vanilla_girl Well-Known Member

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    I've been so depressed lately - I just cry all the time and lay in bed thinking I have no reason to live. then baby starts kicking and I feel so guilty and like such a bad mom adn it starts my crying all over again.
    my spiral of hate goes something like this - OH does somethign to make me sad, I start crying, I want to run away from my life, I want a smoke, but oh no, it's been 6 months so I should be over smoking, want to call a friend but friends don't call me anymore since I"m pregnant and want to call my sister but she's ignoring me or dismissing me all the time. My mom said no body wants to come to my baby shower and has been putting off doing anything for it so why is she not excited to be getting another grandbaby, she dont' even want to talk about it at all. Still hate myself, can't run away because I would still be whereever I ran away to . .. feel like bad mom, feel guiltly being sad since OH is so confused on how to help me, just lay in bed and cry. baby kicks me makes me feel even worse that I might be hurting him by crying all the time . . . I only have 14 weeks to go. I don't want to spend the next 14 weeks hating life

    I need a friend. :nope:
     
  2. Zooy

    Zooy Pregnant with a toddler

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    I don't think it'll hurt your baby but maybe talk to your doctor about it, talk to someone at least.
    Just want to say hugs.
     
  3. Mrs. AJ

    Mrs. AJ Mom to two under two!

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    I am so sorry you are feeling this way. I've been there, and I know how much it sucks! You aren't harming baby, but it is not good for you to go on feeling like this. Please mention this to your MW/Dr. and try to get counseling, it really can help! Medication is also an option, your Dr can reccommend something that will be safe for baby, but it is up to you if you want to go that route. Hang in there, you are stronger than you know! Big hugs!
     
  4. laughingduck

    laughingduck Mother of one daughter

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    Oh no I'm so sorry you're feeling this way :( I agree that counselling can really help. Also if it's really bad maybe the doctor can prescribe something. Hugs to you :hugs:
     
  5. hot tea

    hot tea Guest

    I feel the same way. I am very depressed and unhappy, the guilt of feeling unbonded to my baby is terrible. If you need a friend, I am here. I know I need one.
     
  6. Vanilla_girl

    Vanilla_girl Well-Known Member

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    Thanks everyone. I need the support right now.

    off to bed, hope i feel better in the morning.
     
  7. JaydensMommy1

    JaydensMommy1 Well-Known Member

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    I have come across a lot of women who come into the clinic that I work for the express their depression during pregnancy- and it can be very common. There are a lot of things that can depress a pregnant woman.. anything from worry about baby, worry about how life will be altered, financial issues, family issues- anything really.
    If depression is moderate then I do not believe that there is any adverse reactions on the baby. It is however very common for people who are depressed to experiences lack of hunger. It is important for any women who is pregnant and depressed to make *sure* to eat properly. I know that depression can make food sound completely undesireable but it is necessary for the development of the baby. And please, drink fluids.

    There are other medical conditions such as bipolar disorder that can cause severe severe depression- and this condition is usually under control with a medication known as Lithium. Lithium however cannot be taken during pregnancy because of the high connection with the chemicals and still birth. For women with a severe chemical imbalance such as this one- it can be harmful to the baby because of the stressors placed on her and the baby. Depression medication is not generally advised during pregnancy because of the connection with birth defects. I once again *stress* the fact that moderate depression is not harmful to the baby, but severe clinically noted depression *can* have some reaction to baby especially if medication is stopped, or started. I would talk to a counselor because it really can help. There are a lot of women here (like myself) who have been through rough times and are very happy to share experiences and lend an ear whenever needed.

    Best of luck to you all and a happy and healthy 9 months XX.
     
  8. Rheaz

    Rheaz Well-Known Member

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    Wow can I relate to this one.
    I actually just went to my OB and poured my heart out...you should do the same, if you feel up to it.
    I am at my wits end with myself, and my sister is the same, I was so supportive of her during her two pregnancies and with her two kids and we had one small argument the other day which ended in her calling me a bitch and hanging up on me.
    Um...I'm the pregnant one now, a little nicety please!
    Since then my mother refuses to acknowledge me and my father called me an arsehole.
    I fought with my DF who thinks he's not getting enough love and he slept in the spare room last night and feel very very distant from any friends really, I feel absolutely depressed.
    OB said I could definitely up my dose of Zoloft (I am on a tiny 12.5mg for anxiety and panic attacks), but I don't want drugs, I want understanding, some thoughtfulness and hey, maybe a hug.
    :-(
    I am sending big virtual hugs your way.
    I need one too!!!!
    xx
     
  9. JaydensMommy1

    JaydensMommy1 Well-Known Member

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    Rheaz-
    I am sorry your going through it:( I think we all are.. My "dear OH" decided he didnt want to have a baby and we have been together for 8 years with a 2 year old. He actually wanted me to abort at 14 weeks.. crazy jerk. I would never think of doing that in a million years. So needless to say, after I kicked him out, I have been going through it too.
    He has since apologized, but I think I am too damaged right now. I hope things get better for you too. XX.
     
  10. Lozzy_Loo

    Lozzy_Loo Well-Known Member

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    "Depression that is not treated can have potential dangerous risks to the mother and baby. Untreated depression can lead to poor nutrition, drinking, smoking, and suicidal behavior, which can then cause premature birth, low birth weight, and developmental problems. A woman who is depressed often does not have the strength or desire to adequately care for herself or her developing baby. Babies born to mothers who are depressed may also be less active, show less attention and are more irritable and agitated than babies born to moms who are not depressed. This is why getting the right help is so important for both mom and baby. "
     
  11. Lozzy_Loo

    Lozzy_Loo Well-Known Member

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    hope that helps xx
     

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