Life Needs Tivo!
Do you have that wonderful invention in your home called Tivo? Oh, if you dont, turn off your computer and run to the store right now and get it! I dont know who the genius is who invented it but Id like to take him or her to dinner and buy him or her the best steak in town! I just think its amazing! It has forever changed how I watch television. If my favorite character on my favorite show says something amazingly romantic and I want to watch it again, well, back it up and play it again, Sam! If my husband has left the room, I can pause it and wait for him to come back and well watch it together. I can record and save the episodes I want to watch again, and delete those I didnt like. And you know how incredibly frustrating it is to forget that your favorite show came on while you were grocery shopping? Not anymore! Ill never miss an episode of my favorite show again--this miracle in a box records it for me. I have to admit though, the best part for me is that if I dont want to sit through endless rounds of diaper commercials, I dont have to. I can jump right through them and get to the part I want to watch. Oh, how life needs Tivo!
Wouldnt it be wonderful if you could Tivo through the difficult times in your infertility story? You could replay the early scenes of your marriage before you knew infertility would play a leading role in the story of your life. What a beautiful romance it was! You could sail past the days when you didnt understand the doctors diagnosis or Gods plan, and re-play the days when everything made sense. You could delete the arguments you had with your spouse over whether or not to continue trying and replay the days when your marriage seemed strengthened by infertilitys fire. If only you could skip the negative pregnancy tests and the repeated miscarriages youve had to endure and jump right through to the glorious day you finally hold your healthy full-term baby in your arms. Oh, how life needs Tivo!
One of the frustrating aspects of infertility is the unknown. If you just knew that the end result of this struggle would be that you would eventually bring home a healthy baby, then you could endure all the hardship you face today. If you could Tivo through all the difficulties you live through every single day of your life, and see that in 17 months, 1 week and 4 days youll finally get a positive pregnancy test, then you could handle anything that comes your way, but it just doesnt happen like that. God asks you to trust Him through the unknown days of infertility. Hell show you what you need to know a step at a time.
Luke 11 tells us that when Jesus disciples approached Him and asked Him to teach them how to pray, part of His example to them was to ask for daily bread. Do you realize that Jesus did not instruct them to ask God to provide for them for the rest of their lives, although God clearly has the capability to do so? He didnt even tell them to ask God to provide for them for the next few days. He told them to ask God to provide for them for that day, and that day alone. There was no need to worry about what would happen when the provision for that day ran out. Apparently, Jesus wanted them to ask for daily bread the next day. And the next. And the next. Staying totally dependent on Him, and not worrying about tomorrow. In Matthew 6:34 Jesus says So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Trust God to provide for you--emotionally, physically, relationally, every way--throughout this journey through infertility. He will provide for you what you need as you need it. He will provide your daily bread.
If the uncertainty of infertility is driving you crazy, hear Jesus telling you to ask for your daily bread, the strength you need to make it today. Hear Jesus telling you not to worry about tomorrow, just gain strength from the daily bread Hell provide for you today.
Maybe life doesnt need Tivo after all.
-Beth Forbus