She was the cutest little thing you could ever hope to see. A tiny, little ball of black and white fur appropriately named Minnie. She pranced through my house like she was Queen of the Canine World. It wouldnt have mattered if you could have told her that she only weighed a pound and a half--she already knew she was in charge and apparently all the humans in the room felt the same way.. This constant little companion was such a treasure to us. Perhaps we should have named her Peter. (This will make sense later. I promise!)
One day as I was playing with Minnie, I scooped her up, snuggled her for a few seconds, and gently sat her down on a glass coffee table. All of a sudden, Minnies world changed. Gone was the arrogant prancing of this miniscule pooch. Gone was the air of misplaced confidence. Gone was her love and trust in her master. Even though I knew she was safe and that I wouldnt let her fall off the edge of the table, Minnie was petrified. She couldnt understand what was holding her up or why she wasnt plummeting that terrifying distance of two feet. All she knew was that she was in uncharted territory and would surely perish! And all at the whims of a master that she thought loved her!
Minnie was a little like Peter walking on the water. (Do you think, perhaps, that he pranced on the Sea of Galilee?) Life was good and exciting for him. He had served with Jesus and had front row seats to the transformation of thousands of lives. Jesus comes walking on the water through the night, and even though they were scared, Peter cries out Lord, if it is You, command me to come to You on the water! Jesus simply said come and water turned to concrete beneath Peters feet. Even in the midst of a storm howling around the disciples boat, Peter was making a stand for the Master. He made a stand until he made a giant splash.
Peter got his eyes off of Jesus and the sure ground beneath him gave way. The winds began whipping up and Peter began falling down. He couldnt see a way to keep from drowning. He couldnt feel anything sturdy beneath his feet. He must have trembled as he sputtered his cry for help--Lord, save me!
Sound familiar? Somehow, I bet youve never compared yourself to the loudest, most boisterous confidant of Jesus or to the runt of a pomeranian litter, but now because of infertility, you may just find an image of yourself in this terrified fur-ball or drenched, soaking disciple.
Most of us tend to prance through life, much as my puppy pranced through my house. Or perhaps, being a Christian has come easily. We talk openly about the goodness of God and how we know He works all things to our good, and wonder why others struggle so. Then one day we find ourselves set down by His hand in uncharted territory. A place we cannot understand, and a situation where fear reigns supreme. And all at the hands of a Master we thought loved us.
Infertility is such a confusing place. We dont always know which way to turn and the decisions we must make often seem so unsure. Much like the puppy in this story, we dont understand why He would sit us down in the midst of such a trial. Perhaps we feel more like Peter. We stepped out of our comfort zone and boldly proclaimed to everyone that God would provide the money for treatment, but the money never came. We told anyone who would hear that we knew this pregnancy was different and God had granted life in the womb, only to see another stilled heartbeat. The winds are howling. Your feet are plummeting beneath the waters again. Why would He grant babies to so many others, but not to me?
Hold on! There is more to this story. Peek back into my living room, and glance at my coffee table. That poor little pup was shaking so hard and nearly frozen in fear, that all you heard were her little toenails clicking on the glass table. I never forgot where she stood. The coffee table never intimidated me. I never felt as afraid as she did, wondering how in this world I could rescue my pet from the wiles of the coffee table. I scooped her up off of the table, and loved her and snuggled her until she felt safe again. (You dont seriously think I walked off and left her there, do you?) Before long, she was prancing through my house again like the Queen of the Canine World that she thought she was.
And hold on again! Theres more to Peters story too. Flip back to the pages of Matthew 14. Peter did something that my goofy little puppy never did. (Okay, he did a lot of things my puppy never did, but theres one thing in particular I want you to notice.) Matthew 14:30 says ...he cried out, Lord, save me! Peter knew who to call on. He called on His Master. He may not have understood why Jesus let him come out onto the water, knowing that he would begin to sink, but Peter still knew Jesus loved him and would not let him perish. Scripture goes on to say Immediately Jesus stretched out His hand and took hold of him...
Jesus didnt let Peter perish. He wont allow you to perish either. Call on Him in the midst of your storm.
Just imagine! Someday soon, youll find that youre back in the boat and the waters are beginning to calm. Or perhaps youll notice that youre starting to prance around again like the daughter of the King that you are!
-Beth Forbus
