Clomid Buddies (moved from TTC board)

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Oh Red, sorry you have had such awful Clomid symptoms, they really are no fun at all. Hopefully they will all be worth it! Is today CD20 for you?
 
Thanks Steph :) I thought they'd be over once I had stopped taking them, then thought they'd go when I ovulated but they just keep coming! It's only a couple of days since 0 so hopefully they will calm now :) today is cd19 for me. When do you think I can start testing? It's our wedding anniversary on Monday so would be so nice to get a BFP for then! We've got friends stations over Sunday evening tho so might test Sunday before they arrive and hope for the best, but I'll only be about 6dpo (if I ovulated on the day I got the + so I think that might be too soon. Fingers crossed.
It's so stupid how every month I get so hopeful, still!! I guess this month and the first clomid cycle it's understandable, but I just set myself up for disappointment! And then even if it's positive it probably just means more heartache. I don't know why I'm still doing this to myself!! X
 
Unfortunately, Clomid seems to be a very funny drug and people experience such a variety of side effects on them. It can also take a little while for it to leave your system even after you have stopped taking them, fingers crossed the side effects will go in the next few days. It definitely would be a lovely anniversary present to get a positive on Monday, but at 7DPO, it's probably a little early. I'm no expert though mind you. I've seen very faint positives at 8DPO for some girls.

It's definitely not stupid to get your hopes up each month, only natural I think! I don't know of anyone who doesn't! It can be exhausting though can't it, going through hope, disappointment, hope, disappointment over and over. Fingers crossed for you, Red. Vent with us any time you want!
 
Red - I am so sorry you are experiencing those SE. I also had a lot of those (plus huge mood swings). It is rough! Hang in there!

Well it looks like the test yesterday was a dud. Took 2 more this morning - a curved handled AND a straight handled FRER and both negative. Such a cruel joke! I was skeptical though because I've never gotten a bfp before 10dpo. I think FR is switching back to the straight handles because that's all they had in Walmart yesterday and they've never had them before. Oh well! On to my IVF consult this afternoon!
 
Eurgh Ask, how crap. I've heard such bad things about these FRERs. Hope this afternoon goes well - what are you hoping to get out of this appointment? A timeline of treatment etc. or is it a step before that?
 
Thanks Steph. Super annoying. I think we will go over my meds and timeline etc. Plan is to call at the start of my next cycle and I'll be on birth control for the end (I think) of my next cycle then I'll start stimming after that. Getting close!
 
Oh wow, it feels more real with each step doesn't it. My clinic put me on birth control as of yesterday, still got 2-3 months to go yet though I think. Should get my blood test results next Tuesday and then they can begin matching me with a recipient.
 
I think the nurse said I'll be on BC for 10-14 days.

Are you planning to use donor eggs? What do you mean matching you?
 
Sorry, that's not very clear!

No, if my blood test results come back clear then I will be doing an IVF egg-share. Quite common over here because it is a way of helping to reduce costs of treatment. You have to meet certain criteria in order to be eligible - such as being likely to produce a good number of eggs through stimulation. I would be the donor, and the recipient would be a lady who for whatever reason, cannot use her own eggs. It's obviously a pretty huge undertaking for various reasons. It's a legal requirement through the regulatory body to undergo counselling before treatment, which myself and my husband had last week. That was actually quite a nice experience, I think it only reiterated to us that we feel this is the right path for us at the moment.
 
I'm sorry Ask this process is cruel enough without crap products making it worse!! I never knew you had to go on birth control for IVF? That stuff messes me up too! How come they put you on it? Good luck to both of you!
 
Steph - sorry if I'm misunderstanding still - so are both you and a recipient going to get your eggs?
 
Steph - that was my second thought after I replied! That may be something we try if it ends up that all my eggs are poor quality / chromosomally abnormal. That's great that you are willing to do that and that it reduces costs! You rock!

Red - thanks! It's such crap! I should call First Response and get a refund. Part of me is a little relieved it was just a bad test and I'm not having another CP. I feel annoyed but not heart broken. So they explained to us that they want to "shut down your ovaries" before stimulating them so they put you on BC so that they are inactive for a bit. I guess they must respond better to stims that way and it helps them really control the cycle.
 
Sorry guys, must make an effort to make myself clearer :haha:

Red, yep, both me and a recipient would get my eggs. My husband's mum has actually donated eggs before (altruistically). We've already said that if we manage to have our own children before I become too old to donate eggs, I would do it again altruistically if I was able to.

Ask, does the donor/recipient process work differently over there? I know for example that in the UK, donors can't be paid to donate (they can be reimbursed up to about £750 in expenses). And of course my egg-share would be anonymous.

Yes, that's how I would explain the birth-control thing as well. I think it helps them state on a clean slate. Also, if you are doing a donor/recipient thing, both your cycles would need to be synchronised.
 
I'm not sure how the egg donor stuff works here but it's something I'm going to ask my RE about today just so I'm informed. I know my clinic offers that service. Here's their info: https://www.rgidonoregg.com/
 
Red I also had SE all cycle long after taking femara. It's because your hormones are all so much higher if you developed more than one follicle! I'm keeping my FX for you!

Ask I'm sorry, that seems like such a cruel joke! At least you have a solid plan moving forward!

Steph that's awesome that egg share might be an option for you. I don't think we can do that here in Canada. They decided that someone in the position of needing IVF but not being able to afford it wasn't able to provide consent because they are almost being forced into something they may not want to do (egg share) so that they can afford ivf. I think doing the psych exam is awesome and it does sound like it's the right choice for you!
 
Steph that's such a lovely thing you're doing! I hope that karma recognises that too and gives you lots of happiness and luck with your own journey!
Thanks Belle that's a good sign then hopefully :)
 
I read your link, Ask. I think it's really good when clinics ensure that patients receive counselling.

Belle, I definitely get why that was the conclusion they came to. I completely understand why some women would be so desperate to have a child that they go through the egg share without actually being comfortable with it. It's definitely a bit of a minefield. Husband and I feel very good about our decision, but at the same time (like with most things I guess), you can never truly know how you will react to it until you go through it. Of course one of the things the clinic and the counsellor kept asking was "have you thought about how you would feel if it worked for the recipient and not for you." And yes, of course we have thought about it, but there is no way of knowing until it happens unfortunately. It's up to the donor anyway whether or not they choose to find out if a donation resulted in a pregnancy/birth of a child. Our thoughts on finding out at the moment are that we would probably be happy to find out if we got pregnant, but if we didn't, we wouldn't ask! You don't have a set time-frame to find out anyway - you could ask years down the line.

Ah, this is all such an emotional roller coaster! It's strange, at the start of our journey I was happy as larry, then when I found out we had problems, I was just a bit of a mess permanently. Now, I almost feel a sense of acceptance and I'm not entirely sure where it's come from. I really want a child, but like you've said before Belle, sometimes I think I've made peace with myself that it just might not happen.

I think that's actually the first time I've said (written!) that to anyone. My husband is one of those Oh So Positive types, so I don't think he would really get that at the moment. He would be more inclined to say that we can just keep trying because it will happen at some point! But the way I've been thinking recently is a lot more calm and rational I think. Some people are very mentally strong. Me, I'm not sure how many times I could go through a treatment like IVF and keep getting disappointed. My thoughts at the moment are do the first IVF, and if it doesn't work take time to gather and think things through before rushing in to anything else.

Sorry, I think this post managed to turn into a bit of self-therapy ramble!!
 
Steph it totally is an emotional minefield! I think that is true for so much for infertility. I think for myself I really needed to make peace with the idea of child free living so that I could go through with infertility treatment and survive it if it didn't work out. My DH is also one of those oh so positive types (denial). But last night for the first time he admitted that he didn't know if we would ever be able to have children or not. Before he always just would give a firm "yes we will have kids."

I think its really great steph that you have the option to find out the outcome of the egg share at any point that you want. I think I'd be inclined to wait until after my baby was born. I've also thought about being an egg donor, and if I wasn't in the position of going through infertility myself I probably would have. At this point since we're unexplained I don't know that they would take my eggs lol.

Well saw a bit of fertile cm today. So I know I should actually O this round. We're still just going to avoid things for now. If I don't get this job we'll get back into casually trying in September (just BDing around the times when I see ewcm). We'll do the full 3 month of naturopathy treatment before doing our last IUI.
 
I find that really hard to think about. Hubby seems to have this mentality that we will keep trying until we succeed, but I don't know how many more losses I can handle. We spoke about it the other day and he said it just doesn't effect him as much, because he doesn't physically see or feel it, so it's not the same experience, and he is just focused on the end result, constantly positive. And he doesn't have to go through all the hormones and side effects of treatment (other than putting up with my mood swings). It is hard for him, but he admits he doesn't get how hard it is for me. It's put a bit of strain on us because I want to start thinking about the possibility of fostering with a view to adopt, but he just isn't there yet, as he won't admit we may not have a biological child. I just don't know how long he expects us to do this for!!
 
Red - I could have written that myself. I think it's just a lot harder for men to understand what we are going through because yes like you said it's just different for them. I used to think it was because my DH already has two biological children but after talking with you all I realize maybe it's just a male thing. My DH is not ready to consider adoption as an option. He did say that he is willing to do whatever it takes to have a family together. But like the rest of your DHs he is the eternal optimist.
 
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