Clomid/FE Conceived Buddies :)

OMG!! Pretty sure AF is back! I stipped bleeding 4 weeks pp, and am basicly 6 weeks pp, I have all my typical AF symptoms... Cramps, moody, irritated, diarrhea, and bright red bleeding. Seeing my OB in 2 days so will discuss with her... But isnt 6 weeks too early??? I am exclusively BFing.

Perhaps the skin break out was Ovulation :o or maybe I didnt even O..who knows. If its the case that AF is back and that maybe my body is Oing on its own again, nr2 might be coming sooner than we think. Wishful thinking...why would I suddenly O on my own again :haha:
 
Nita, I've got a basic idea of what I want from a birth plan, but I have a lot left to do I know. We haven't even done a hospital tour yet (at what point would you recommend doing this?). For us things are a little challenging hospital wise; the nearest hospital is at least an hour away (but they don't accept our insurance), and the one we plan to go to is an hour and a half away. I also want to do some birthing classes. Not sure at what point we should do those either.

I would like to go for a natural birth, but I want to leave myself the option to change my mind if need be. The hospital we have chosen also offers hydrotherapy which is appealing to me. Many of the women in my family have had c sections (mom, sister, sister in law), but whether I would choose a planned c section or induction (risking an emergency c section later) is a tough call; not sure what I would do in that situation.

And Nita, congrats on AF coming back! Hopefully things are getting back to normal for you!

Fluffy you sound lightyears ahead of me in planning, sounds like I have some work to do, lol! :)
 
Lucy, you dont need to decide now...only when younget closer to 30 weeks :) regarding hospital tours and birthing classes.. I think it woukd be a good idea to enquire from the hospital no2 and ask them when it can be done.. Mine was at 31 weeks, but I had to make the booking for it on 20 weeks already.
 
Well, I had quite an interesting 6 week check up at my OB. She admitted today that she was extremely worried about Liezl in my last weeks of pregnancy, but she is so relieved it went well. :) my uturus is back to normal and I have healed very well. She gave me a prescription for the mini-pil but also gave us the go ahead to start trying for Nr2 immediately.. She says no need to wait, iys an old wifes tale. As soon as I am up for it we should try. So I guess sex is now turning into the baby dance again?

My dh seems keen to start trying now as well, but we have some things to consider before we decide.

Sarah, I thought you might find this interesting.

Then Liezl went to pediatrician, weighs 3.85kg and shes 53cm long. He also confirmed she has reflux, but not bad enough for medication. The whites of her eyes is also blueish and we must keep an eye on it, as it could be a sign of brittle bone disease, however most babies have tge blueish white and it goes away with time.
 
Wow lots to catch up on.

Sorry Fluffy I think we must have posted at the same time. That’s great you’ll have all those appointments. Do you know if you’ll get a scan each time?

As for birth plans, I’m probably not the best person to ask. Some of this might be quite harsh, so I apologize, but this is more about if I knew what I was in for when I was 39 weeks pregnant, things would have been somewhat different- My birth plan was fairly loose. I wanted minimal intervention, avoid c section at all cost, whatever works at the time, whatever position I wanted at the time, whatever pain relief I want at the time, skin to skin ASAP, delayed cord clamping and breastfeeding. Of all of that, I got breastfeeding. Nothing else went to plan. I didn’t think our birth plan was overly ridged. But I think in all of it, my biggest disappointment was the lack of control and lack of respect I was shown.

My first recommendation would be, unless it’s medically necessary or you’re 2 weeks overdue, avoid being induced. I think that’s where my problems started. Secondly, when you’re in that position, you’re in pain and overwhelmed. You don’t know what’s normal. It’s like this big thing everyone talks about as the most painful thing of your life and you can’t help but feeling nervous. I’d suggest reading Ina May Gaskin’s guide to childbirth. Skip the first half and just take what works for you from the second half (I had 16 hours of induced posterior labour with no pain relief using those techniques). You also need to have a birth team that you trust. I thought I had that but I didn’t.

I don’t know. Im probably not the best person to talk about birth plans. But I’d just add that you want to be treated with care and respect and have your wishes listened to. I don’t think I’ll ever get over what happened to me.

Anyway, breastfeeding. Haha you ask when did we feel like we ‘got it’. Can I let you know when that happens?? Again, I’m not the best person to ask amongst thrush, vascular spasms, 2 tongue tie revisions, cows milk protein intolerance, shields, low weight gain, oversupply (probably just need mastitis and then I’ve collected them all). I guess I’d say breastfeeding is about 90% determination and perseverance. Get help from a lactation consultant. Get checked for a tongue tie early. Make sure you have a good latch each feed. Get support from family and friends (but Nita is spot on about the grandma thing). You’ll feel like feeding is all you do. You’ll realise how much of your life you did other stuff when you have no choice but to sit there feeding for 4-8 hours. When your milk comes in it hurts and it’s not much fun. Your supply will settle down and your boobs won’t go from full to empty quite as dramatically. It’s worth it though, breastfeeding is kind of addictive haha.

TTC, I hope everything’s going well for you. I think the tongue tie release is helping. We are almost completely weaned off the shield. I don’t blame you having a planned cs. I don’t know if I could go through labour to end up with an emergency one again. But also if I did that then I’d never get the chance to try a vaginal birth because they won’t do a VBA2C here.

Nita, wow! That seems really soon for AF to come back. What did your OB say? We were strictly told not to TTC for 12 months and that’s the general rule with limiting the risk of uterine rupture. That can be deadly so I’m not willing to take the risk. It might pay to just do some research on it. But of course it happens. My sister in law had 3 c sections and then fell pregnant 3 months after her 3rd. I guess if you’re having a RCS it’s not as risky? I’m not sure. But I’m still way to sore to DTD and it’s way too soon to even want to go down that track.

That’s good about your pediatrician appointment. We are the same with the reflux. Apparently the medication can cause sore tummies. Her weight is good! William was 4kg at her age. That’s interesting about the blue eyes, william’s is blue there too.

Lucy, we did ours around 30 weeks I think. That’s exactly what I wanted from my birth too. I’m not saying you won’t get it because things will probably go perfectly for you. But I wish I’d stopped and considered what it would be like if things hadn’t gone how I wanted them too. I was blinded by my positive thinking. Hope for the best but be realistic about what could happen is what I wish I’d done.

Afm, I just don’t know what I’m doing wrong. He’s slowed down again on the weight gain. For the 3 weeks before last week he averaged 80-90g per week. Last week he only gained 60g. 110g a week is minimum. He’s now below the 2nd percentile. His poos are green and mucousy and very frequent. I’ve cut out dairy and I’m sterilising everything perfectly. My GP said it’s definitely a cows milk intolerance but things aren’t improving significantly. My doctor won’t refer us to a pediatrician, apparently the advice would be to just remove more things from my diet. So I guess I try soy and eggs and see what happens. I also had a scan yesterday to look for the source of the pain. They found no hernias or retained placenta (which I knew already because I’d had other scans since then). So I’m waiting to go back to the OB/gyn to see what the next step is. I’m just so f’ing over it. When will it all end... but on a positive note, William has some how decided that sleeping 9 and a half hours at night is a good thing and I don’t disagree haha
 
Lucy, haha, don't worry! We just happened to have had a fairly in-depth meeting with my midwife at... 13 weeks pregnant, I think? We met her in the labour & delivery ward and she showed us around and explained everything, so that gave me a good idea. I still think I have a lot to learn from the birthing classes though :) I had to sign up for my birthing class at 8 weeks (!!!) pregnant and got the last spot - so I suggest you check them out soon! Mine are run by the midwife who will be there for my birth and postpartum care, which was important to me.

Nita, glad to hear you are healing so well and that your little girl is doing great :) How soon do you think you will try for no. 2? Will you have the famous 2 under 2?

Sarah, I don't know if I get a scan each time... I have so far? I know that in January, they start recording the baby's heartbeat for about 20 minutes or so each time, so maybe then they won't do scans every time anymore? Not sure ^^"
You don't have to apologise for however you feel about your birth or about sharing your experience - I think we're all here for exactly that kind of information! I find it really helpful to hear lots of different perspectives. Have you considered talking to someone (qualified) about your birthing experience? I think my hospital offers counselling for traumatic births, maybe you have something like that available? It is a massive, life-changing event after all.

I think the difficult thing is, you are so right, you truly can't know if your (medical) birth team is going to be good until you've been through it with them. I hope my experienced midwife will be great - but I won't know for sure until it's too late. I also hope my doctor will look after me well, she's a colleague of my sister's after all, but again, I won't know until after. I've heard the same about being induced, so that is somethign I would also really like to avoid. My own mum walked the stairs for 6 hours! to bring on labour naturally because they said they would induce her the next day - it worked. So I'm planning to do everything I can and hope for the best.

I wish I was qualified to give you good advice on your healing process and William's weight gain :( What I have learned from being the only not-doctor in my family though: Seeing a specialist (pediatrician, OB etc. instead of a GP/general doctor) makes a *huge* difference. I'm sorry to say lots of general practicioners really don't keep up to date with medical research. So if you can, I would push for that - I understand of course that sometimes, your GP just won't budge and that's hugely frustrating.
Something my mum told me about breastfeeding that I wanted to pass on to you: She said that if you feed for too long or too frequently, your milk can dilute down and that can give sore tummies, runny poos and poor weight gain. She said even if it will make your boobs sore for a few days, not feeding too often (she said no more than every 2 hours and not longer than 20 minutes max) will often help sort things out. Babies often want to nurse for comfort, but if they have sensitive tummies, it can create problems. - Full disclosure, my mum is a doctor but *not* an OB/GYN or a pediatrician, so of course if this advice contradicts what your doctor told you for you specifically, listen to your doctor instead! I just wanted to share in case it might be helpful, you never know.
 
Sarah - (Don't shoot me for this advice :) ) Have you considered testing your milk? Or giving William Soy formula with some feedings and see what happens? I know you want to breastfeed, and I know its amazing...but it may be worth looking into. Let me be honest with you, Liezl will be going over to Formula with anti colic bottles and reflux formula milk during December and January, and she will be on formula only starting in February. Bfing is great, but I can see the reflux is hurting her, so I am willing to do whatever to make it better. Her pediatrician gave me the go ahead to put her on formula, he says she is doing well and only really need breastmilk the first month.

Fluffy - I understand what your mom says, but it rarely ever works out that way - going through a growth spurt (warning, theres one between 7 - 10 days) you feed every hour, and if you dont your baby will suck anything..hands, clothes, etc.
I try to feed every 2-3 hours, and her normal feeding time is 10minutes but sometimes it can be upto an hour - I just switch breasts. :) feed on the demand if you want a happy baby lol.

DH and I will NTNP for a few months and actively TTC in a few months :)
 
Sarah, you are so right. I suppose we need to prepare for the worst while hoping for the best. Will definitely take your advice and avoid being induced as much as possible. Not only have I heard of complications with it, but I have also heard that it is more painful.

I think I will start signing up for classes after our anatomy scan next week. Omg, literally counting down the days.

I am just dying wanting to order baby things with all the Black Friday and Cyber Monday deals. I have been looking, but nothing that I have been wanting went on sale. Some of the smaller things I have tried to hold back on because I know we will have lots of friends and family who will want to gift us things. Suppose it's for the best, we don't have anywhere to put anything since we are between houses at the moment. The house is under roof, but still a long way to go. DH has been working so, so hard.
 
Lucy - if you are planning on having a baby shower then don't buy any small things. I have a whole cupboard with creams and meds and grooming sets and all these small things, some I dont even know if I will ever use it. Plus I got a whole lot of free stuff and samples from the clinics and hospital. Even nappies, and if you buy some, especially new born nappies, dont buy a lot, they literally grow by the day and one day they will just be too small.
Something you can never have enough off is wet wipes...if you get them on special now, buy! even if you get a whole bunch at the shower. If you are planning on Bfing you will see your baby poops a lot, like 8 - 10 times a day and I sometimes use up to 5 wipes to clean her bum. I easily go through 80 wipes in 5 days.


So Liezl had her 6 week vaccination and it hasnt been easy, she refuse fever meds, she throws up and cry a lot, shes not drinking and when she does her reflux is very bad - I feel so sorry for her. She is just cranky the whole flippen time!
 
Fluffy, I love being able to cheat by a day or two and peek at your ticker, lol :winkwink:
 
@Nita
Haha, good to know I shouldn't beat myself up if it doesn't work out with the schedule! I just wondered if it's something Sarah had tried, since feeding on demand didn't seem to give her a happy baby ;) I totally agree that, especially in the beginning, whatever works for you and baby and makes you both happy is what you should stick with! Whether that's a schedule or feeding on demand, I guess you'll only truly know once you're there and have tried it, right?

@Lucy
Haha, we're only like 2-3 days apart, right? :D So cool! I love that we're going through things so closely together ^^
I also couldn't buy much (got a few cute clothing items) during the sales, the things I wanted didn't go on sale either. That said, we have already gotten the nursery furniture, the pram and the car seat, so I feel like we have sorted out at least the big ticket items that can take a long time to order.

I'm also holding back on some small cutesy items in case of a baby shower. I would like one, but it's not a thing in Germany and my UK friends and family can hardly all fly over here just for one... so I kinda doubt I'll be getting one ^^" Might just buy a lot of the small things after 30 weeks, I think :)

Lucy, do you have an idea of when you'll be moving to your new house yet? Must be so exciting to have your own place! We are currently renting and have moved house basically every year (the joys of woring in academia), but we're hoping to own our own place within the next 5 years or so ^^
 
Fluffy, yup, looks like we are just 2 days apart! :) I was this close to buying a travel system and glider the night before last. Now I am wishing I had, because they are out of stock. Grrrr... I guess at this point I might as well wait until after the anatomy scan. 7 days to go!

We are hoping to be in our house by the end of February. We can't wait to have our own space again! My aunt has been so gracious, she has basically vacated her house to give us privacy, but we are ready to have our own place to call home again. The build process is a little stressful, but so far so good!
 
Ok, I jinxed it. I was watching the website carefully, and the travel system I wanted came back in stock...so I ordered it. Then later today, the glider came back in stock too...and so I ordered that as well! LOL. Sorry honey!

I am fortunate to have a very understanding DH. But that's not to say he won't get a chuckle out of my obsessiveness, lol.
 
Fluffy, that’s cool. The scans are amazing but I found I still just couldn’t picture having him inside. When he was born and I saw him I wanted to put him back in there for a wee while haha.

I’ve thought about talking to someone about it but my doctor could only recommend a regular counsellor. She wouldn’t refer me to maternal mental health because I’m not depressed or anything. I think if feel worse talking to someone who really has no clue. We could pay and see a private psychologist but that would be hundreds of dollars and I don’t know what I’d actually achieve. It’s done and we are alive. The only thing that would fix things is a rewind button. I dunno, I just don’t know if it’s just make things worse.

It’s impossible to say whether being induced was the cause. I was told it slightly increases your chance of an ecs but then I’ve also read otherwise. And you can’t rewind and wait and see what happened. Your mum must have been exhausted! I tried all those tricks too. I had 3 stretch and sweeps in 3 days. Babies do what they want to do! And you’re right. You never know if your birth team are going to be good until you’re in that position. My midwife left before we went into the c section. Someone said ‘well she probably realized she wasn’t going to get paid for your birth’.

Thanks for the advice from your mum. I’m feeding him every 2-3 hours in the day but he goes 9-10 hours at night without a feed. We are going back to the doctor on Tuesday to get a referral. The lactation consultant said his poos do not look like a healthy breastfed baby should have. She wanted me to feed him more often! I’m just going to carry on as we are in the mean time. He isn’t starved and he’s happy. So I really don’t know.

As for a schedule vs demand. I still would strongly recommend on demand. Babies don’t know what the time is and their tummies are so small. In my antenatal group there were 6 of us. Three followed a schedule and 2 are on demand and they do sleep (which we don’t do). The ones of scedules are no longer breastfed because their milk dried up because their babies needed more but the schedule said not for another 4-5 hours. They lay in bed listening to their babies crying because the schedule said it wasn’t time to wake up. William is sleeping 9-10 hours at night and having 2-4 good naps in the day. The others are still feeding their babies through the night and they’ve never slept more than 6 hours in a go. I think our issues are more to do with his digestive track rather than what and how often he’s being fed. I just found if you’re fighting against your baby for sleep and food then you’re not likely to win, at least in the short term. They’re only little for so long and we spend our whole lives on a schedule. Feed them when they’re hungry and let them sleep when they’re tired. Having a baby has been far easier than I expected I think it’s because we aren’t stressed about what he does.

Nita, I just don’t think formula is the answer. Mainly because soy isn’t good for boys and cow and goat formula have very similar proteins. I can get a script for one but I’m just not convinced it’s the problem. I’ve donated my milk to 5 different babies and they’ve all been fine. Some of them in neonates too. I know there’s nothing wrong with formula but if he has a sensitive tummy I want to make sure we are being given the right advice and everyone has said breastfeeding is best until they are 12 months. If the paediatrician says he needs to go on formula then I will but in the mean time I think that has the potential to upset his stomach even more.

Will you have a repeat c section next time? I’d just do some reading on TTC after a c section. Everything I’ve heard and read (including the WHO recommendation) is 12-18 months. Otherwise you’re at an increase risk of a uterine rupture. What did your doctor say about that?


Lucy, I actually found the contractions fine. I found when I got myself into the right headspace and could breath through them I was fine. But I’ve heard induced contractions hurt more. But I preferred no epidural. The epidural was the most painful thing on the day of my induction. So you might find you cope with the pain just fine. But if not there’s pain relief there.

I agree with Nita about the little things. Don’t bother buying face cloths. I suggest buying stuff people won’t give you. Like mattress protectors for your cot and of course the big items. I have to say I don’t use our pram. I wish we’d gotten a travel system or not worried about a pram. It might be good when he’s older but I just wear him in the Tula. I so recommend baby wearing. We have a Tula Free To Grow and a Moby wrap. That’s the best thing I bought.
 
Hey ladies! Just got back from my appointment and everything looks great!! Still on track for July 16th due date and baby’s heartbeat was 148 <3 Huge sense of relief seeing its flickering heart!! Baby looks like a little gummy bear with arm and leg buds (its upside down in the photos) so cute!!

https://i66.tinypic.com/dlm39u.jpg
https://i66.tinypic.com/142a80k.jpg
 
Hi ladies. I don't want to sound like a creeper here but have been reading along with your journeys. Congrats to all the mummy's on their babies and to the mum's to be. I just wanted to make a comment to Sarah, I have a 6 month old boy (also based in nz) and can relate to a bit of what you have gone through. I also found my birth experience extremely traumatic and felt a bit bullied by my midwife and let down by the system. All though my experience was very different to yours I can relate to some of your feelings. I have also been dealing with a CMPA baby which has been a challenge which we are only just coming though. It sounds like you are doing a great job though, being a new mum is hard enough without added challenges. Just wanted to throw that out there, sounds like your little guy is happy and doing great.
 
Sarah, DH and I will NTNP for now, I also asked on our local forums about it and a lot of women got the same advice. I do trust my OB so we will see if I can actually fall pregnant naturally. I will have a repeat CS as I want to be sterilised as well. Weve decided only 2 kids.

Thats great news Four!! I am so happy for you. Whats next? Another appointment?

We use our pram a lot, we take Liezl for walks occasionally. And we also bought it very early on, as soon as we found out the gender on 16 weeks.

I am trying to put Liezl on formula for 1 feeding a day to help the acid reflux, its a nightmare!! She still cries for the boobie. I am so frustrated and shes in so mich pain. Ugh!!!!
 
Next appointment is just after Christmas and we will get another u/s :)
 
What a great Christmas gift Four! How exciting. I bet you cant wait for the time to go by :)
 
Hi ladies!

Sorry just caught up (mostly!) on this thread after the longest time. Lovely to see so much good news!
Pregnancy is kicking my ass currently hence why I haven't been around so much. Morning sickness back, I have bad SPD and am on crutches and have gestational diabetes so am now on insulin injections... that aside it's going well &#128514; Thanks goodness not too much longer left now, it's such a struggle to do anything I'm finishing work next week and taking some time to chill and try and rest as much as I can or I won't make it till the end!

Nita so glad things are going great for you. Sounds like Liezl is doing well and you are too so I'm happy to see that after the rocky end to your pregnancy! Reflux is a killer, we had it badly too here, we tried a number of things but ranitidine was the only thing that made a difference. I see you are thinking about number 2! All I will say is it is so so hard having 2 close together, I know baby seems easy enough now but honestly it's a whole different ball game in 6 months time. I remember getting broody when she was about 2 months old and almost started trying but now I'm so glad we waited. A couple of my friends had 2 kids under 2 and it's incredibly hard work, just my warning haha &#128514;

Sarah I'm so sorry things are still hard for you. Sounds like I could have written your story myself! My daughter was the same with cows milk protein allergy and bad reflux, and for me bad recovery from my section! Re allergies, my gp was not clued up at all and it wasn't until we saw a specialist paediatrician that she was diagnosed. She was out on hypoallergenic formula made from coconut and rantitidine too and she was a different baby in a week! But honestly hell in the beginning. Don't get fobbed off by your doctor, they made me feel I was going mad in the beginning but I knew something wasn't right! As for your c section, it does take time to get over it. We have something called birth stories here where you get to meet with a consultant and a midwife to discuss what happened if you had a traumatic birth and go through your notes. I didn't end up doing it as I wanted tot see how I felt but honestly just give it time. I felt very different at 6 months and then almost fine about it after a year. I have a little tinge of sadness now but if you can stick it out for a while longer you will likely find your thoughts on it change. I was absolutely adamant I wanted a VBaC this time but I don't know now, I do want to experience childbirth but at the same time I'm in so much pain now and with all he rest of my complications I'm pretty much done with this pregnancy already! They have offered me a section at 37 weeks if I want it, but I can't have induction this time because of previous section and they don't want me to go past 40 weeks due to my complications. So I don't know what will happen now as I can see me not being able to walk in another month! Having said that recovery from section is very different when you have another one at home already.. I won't get to rest and recuperate as school runs etc need doing and my husband will only have 2 weeks off... we will see!

All you other pregnant ladies I'm so happy for you! Hang in there, it's a long journey but a lovely one!

&#128536;&#128536;
 

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