Considering at-home insemination with donor sperm...?

[whlisa19]

Yes I know. Regardless of how we conceive, its basically adoption rights. Luckily the donors have been happy to no obligation NI me

Wow. Just heard from a new donor. Sounds awesome!

Maryland NI Only Donor
Successful past: 6 daughters
Discreet where needed
Very Patient
Healthy. Never had STD’s Tested recently. Willing to be tested again.
High Volume Ejaculate (5.5ml)
High Sperm Count (80mil/ml)
Motility = 81%
6’ 2” tall, 245lbs, Athletic build like a football player), brown hair and goatee, Hazel eyes.
IQ range 142-144
Former US Marine 2nd Lieutenant
Degrees: BA Theology, BS Psychology, AA Computer Science
Will travel

I want him to be one of my donors. It will give me my baby

Hi Lisa, I've been meaning to ask you if you live in one of those states where the donor has rights over the child if the child is conceived during "sex"

From my understanding, some states have laws whereby as long as the child is conceived via "intercourse", even if the donor has signed an agreement, he is still eligible to contest for custody of the child. Since I see that you are doing a lot of "NI" I just thought I would give you and your DH a heads up to make sure you are covered in case you get your and the donor actually comes back to demand parental rights.

I would feel a lot better if you checked this out and made sure that all donors signed an air tight agreement that they would not try to fight for any rights when you get pregnant.

Sorry if I'm being a busybody about this, but just concerned. Hope this doesn't offend you.

 

[calla]

I know that this is probably a post with a bit too much information, but wondered if anyone had any tips on this. I am trying to work out which days are best for insemination. I get egg white mucus around day 9/10/11 of my cycle and then seem to get a positive OPK and ovulate later around day 11/12/13/14 by which time the time the egg white mucus has gone. I have been trying at the day around or after the OPK, but wonder if I should be trying earlier at the time of the peak of egg white mucus. Thanks for any advice!

Hi calla, I would suggest starting to inseminate as soon as you see egg white mucus. Egg white mucus will help keep the sperm alive and slowly release them over time to swim into your uterus to meet the egg when its finally released. Better to have the sperm waiting for the egg than to be swimming in and trying to reach the egg in time.

Hope this helps!

I can only really pick two to three days per month for logistical reasons, but will try earlier this month and see. Thanks for the advice.

 

[c.30]

I know that this is probably a post with a bit too much information, but wondered if anyone had any tips on this. I am trying to work out which days are best for insemination. I get egg white mucus around day 9/10/11 of my cycle and then seem to get a positive OPK and ovulate later around day 11/12/13/14 by which time the time the egg white mucus has gone. I have been trying at the day around or after the OPK, but wonder if I should be trying earlier at the time of the peak of egg white mucus. Thanks for any advice!

Hi calla, I would suggest starting to inseminate as soon as you see egg white mucus. Egg white mucus will help keep the sperm alive and slowly release them over time to swim into your uterus to meet the egg when its finally released. Better to have the sperm waiting for the egg than to be swimming in and trying to reach the egg in time.

Hope this helps!

I can only really pick two to three days per month for logistical reasons, but will try earlier this month and see. Thanks for the advice.

I used to be a bit like that Calla, with the EWCM drying up around ovulation. I increased my water intake to 2 litres a day which made my ewcm more watery, which is still fertile, and I used 1mg of preseed - do you know about preseed? Towards the end I would get 1 donation on the day of my +opk and I'd usually ovulate the day after. Do you tend to OV the day of the OPK? It is a hard one to call but, with good ewcm, in theory, if you get a donation a day or 2 before OV, like Ebelle said, the sperm will be waiting for the egg good luck and

 

[firechild30]

Congrats on the anniversaries! Would love to see that you both get BFPs as the universe's gift.
AF finally showed. pretty bummed about it this time, I tried really hard not to get my hopes up, but couldn't really stop it from happening. what kinda cruel trick is it to just have a random late period when u ovulated on time and are ttc? Gonna call the doc tomorrow. AF has been different since I started clomid, I just want them to check it out.
DH has decided that we shouldn't skip this cycle, he thinks we will have extra luck cause inseminations we be right around his birthday.
Good luck to everyone getting donations! We had two successes last month right? Its so encouraging, really hope to see a few more this month.

 

[laurac1988]

Opk is now negative!!!
Yay

https://i1164.photobucket.com/albums/q568/lauracostello1988/th_0b8ecc43b8891c2f0da32f84b31cbe07.jpg

 

[Juniperjules]

Congrats on the anniversaries! Would love to see that you both get BFPs as the universe's gift.
AF finally showed. pretty bummed about it this time, I tried really hard not to get my hopes up, but couldn't really stop it from happening. what kinda cruel trick is it to just have a random late period when u ovulated on time and are ttc? Gonna call the doc tomorrow. AF has been different since I started clomid, I just want them to check it out.
DH has decided that we shouldn't skip this cycle, he thinks we will have extra luck cause inseminations we be right around his birthday.
Good luck to everyone getting donations! We had two successes last month right? Its so encouraging, really hope to see a few more this month.

Sorry about AF arriving : (
I wholeheartedly agree! It sux that AF starts playing games suddenly when we are TTC. My Chinese medicine lady told me to make sure I'm relaxed & distracted bcos it is soooooooo common that Ov & AF can start messing around when ur actively TTC.. I honestly thought, 'nah, that won't happen to me'.. But it has!! So weird...I've had SO much stress & anxiety this year, and AF never changed at all.. Until I started TTC!!! What's with that!??!? The brain& body really are a mystery!

Every month I say I won't get my hopes up too, but it's impossible. So from now on I'm gonna accept that hope is what gets me thru the TWW, & hope is what keeps me going after AF arrives! So I'm gonna embrace getting my hopes up from now on & stop trying to kid myself that I'm not hopeful!!

Onwards & upwards.. We def need some new BFP's in here as a hope booster!! Come on girls... Who's next for a BFP???

 

[KelleyNJen]

Opk is now negative!!!
Yay

https://i1164.photobucket.com/albums/q568/lauracostello1988/th_0b8ecc43b8891c2f0da32f84b31cbe07.jpg

Good luck to you Laura!!!

 

[laurac1988]

Thanks Hun. Really hope this is the one

 

[c.30]

Sorry AF got you firechild! Here's hoping for your october BFP!!

Laura, looks like the timing was great, lots of luck to you!

to all you other TTC'ers

 

[calla]

I know that this is probably a post with a bit too much information, but wondered if anyone had any tips on this. I am trying to work out which days are best for insemination. I get egg white mucus around day 9/10/11 of my cycle and then seem to get a positive OPK and ovulate later around day 11/12/13/14 by which time the time the egg white mucus has gone. I have been trying at the day around or after the OPK, but wonder if I should be trying earlier at the time of the peak of egg white mucus. Thanks for any advice!

Hi calla, I would suggest starting to inseminate as soon as you see egg white mucus. Egg white mucus will help keep the sperm alive and slowly release them over time to swim into your uterus to meet the egg when its finally released. Better to have the sperm waiting for the egg than to be swimming in and trying to reach the egg in time.

Hope this helps!

I can only really pick two to three days per month for logistical reasons, but will try earlier this month and see. Thanks for the advice.

I used to be a bit like that Calla, with the EWCM drying up around ovulation. I increased my water intake to 2 litres a day which made my ewcm more watery, which is still fertile, and I used 1mg of preseed - do you know about preseed? Towards the end I would get 1 donation on the day of my +opk and I'd usually ovulate the day after. Do you tend to OV the day of the OPK? It is a hard one to call but, with good ewcm, in theory, if you get a donation a day or 2 before OV, like Ebelle said, the sperm will be waiting for the egg good luck and

Thanks for the advice. I really can't quite pinpoint the day of ovulation, I think it is probably the day of or the day after the OPK+, I think my temp rises slowly and also I think my sleep is disrupted around that time so it is hard to detect the temp shift.

 

[Melcook]

Hi girls I have a question. Ok I had a negative OPK at 10pm last night. I had. Positive at 8am this morning and now at 4:30pm it's negative again. I usually have a smiley for two days does this mean I missed the egg. I can't insem for another 45 or so. Do I still have a chance?

 

[Melcook]

Just completed our first ICI woohoo! Dh said I had lots of egg white cm. unfortunately he couldn't get to my cervix but he aimed in the general direction so hopefully that works now Dh is sticking me on bed rest and told me to call out tomorrow so I don't go to work after our insem in the morning. Lol! Fingers crossed!

 

[KelleyNJen]

Just completed our first ICI woohoo! Dh said I had lots of egg white cm. unfortunately he couldn't get to my cervix but he aimed in the general direction so hopefully that works now Dh is sticking me on bed rest and told me to call out tomorrow so I don't go to work after our insem in the morning. Lol! Fingers crossed!

Sounds like perfect timing! Good luck to you!

 

[whlisa19]

Just completed our first ICI woohoo! Dh said I had lots of egg white cm. unfortunately he couldn't get to my cervix but he aimed in the general direction so hopefully that works now Dh is sticking me on bed rest and told me to call out tomorrow so I don't go to work after our insem in the morning. Lol! Fingers crossed!

fingers super crossed for you

 

[whlisa19]

I feel lonely. DH is away on business and I haven't had any donations for 3 days because he has been too busy with his work and family It wasn't like that at first because he would come over everyday and help me

But he did tell me that he has my donation party all set for tomorrow and I don't know exactly how many but should be a lot of I'm so excited and only wish DH could be there so he and I could hug and hold each other after they are done ejaculating into me

I just know I am going to get my this time

 

[Tink80]

I feel lonely. DH is away on business and I haven't had any donations for 3 days because he has been too busy with his work and family It wasn't like that at first because he would come over everyday and help me

But he did tell me that he has my donation party all set for tomorrow and I don't know exactly how many but should be a lot of I'm so excited and only wish DH could be there so he and I could hug and hold each other after they are done ejaculating into me

I just know I am going to get my this time

"Donation party" sounds a little concerning and scary..especially since you are doing NI. Do you actually know the people showing up and know if they have been tested for STDs?
I really mean no offense...of course we all want a baby, that is why we are here. I just hope you don't lose track of your safety and health in the way you go about it. If these people are strangers, please be careful. I would also have to think this could affect the well being of your relationship and your emotional and mental health as well.
I was sexually assaulted in my past and I wouldn't wish it on anyone. That is the only reason I felt I needed to say something. Please take care.

 

[firechild30]

I am having trouble sleeping and really need to vent. Please excuse this rant, and I sincerely do not want to offend anyone but I have nowhere else to let off steam about this. I have a childhood friend who I love dearly but has chose a very different path in life. we are not as close as we used to be but remain friends. We decided to get together after texting about what horrible weeks we have both had at work. When we get together I always ask her the status of her drug problem- I am very open with her about my disapproval and concern- it is the sole reason we are not as close. she says that she isn't smoking pot and has quit drinking, but is still trying to get off narcotics. I praise her and hug her and ask her how she's finally got to this point. She replies that she's pregnant. it was like someone stabbed me in the chest! It was so difficult not to start crying. I congratulated her and asked questions, one being if she was seeking professional help for the narcotics and if she intended to move out of her parents. she answered no to both.
I want so badly to be happy for her, but I feel so hurt. I don't understand. I feel like I am so selfish for feeling like I deserve a child more than her. I know its not right but I feel angry that she got pregnant without even trying and with her life in the shape that its in.
I am not like this everytime I know someone who gets pregnant. I just feel so cheated by life.

 

[KelleyNJen]

I feel lonely. DH is away on business and I haven't had any donations for 3 days because he has been too busy with his work and family It wasn't like that at first because he would come over everyday and help me

But he did tell me that he has my donation party all set for tomorrow and I don't know exactly how many but should be a lot of I'm so excited and only wish DH could be there so he and I could hug and hold each other after they are done ejaculating into me

I just know I am going to get my this time

I am going to have to agree withTink on this. It sounds a bit suspect and dangerous, in addition you had mentioned not telling your DH about this. How do you think he will feel if you do get your BFP by going behind his back and being secretive about it. My partner and I used donor sperm but I would have walked away from her completely if she had done something like that. Having a baby using donor sperm requires a great amount of trust, don't blow it now. This is just my opinion, I could be wrong.

 

[Juniperjules]

I feel lonely. DH is away on business and I haven't had any donations for 3 days because he has been too busy with his work and family It wasn't like that at first because he would come over everyday and help me

But he did tell me that he has my donation party all set for tomorrow and I don't know exactly how many but should be a lot of I'm so excited and only wish DH could be there so he and I could hug and hold each other after they are done ejaculating into me

I just know I am going to get my this time

I'm also more than a little concerned by your post.*Everyone has a right to make their own choices & decisions about what they do & what their relationship can withstand & this TTC business can be draining & straining on a relationship. But it seems like there could be a couple of dangerous issues that you might be creating for yourself. I'm judging that only on the info that u share on BnB of course, so pls forgive me if this sounds harsh, but this is a public forum & you have been very open in ur descriptions of ur interactions with ur donor..

You've mentioned not telling your DH about getting together to BD with your donor, & (forgive me if this comes out wrong) but it seems like the situation with ur donor is sort of murky & the idea of having a 'donation party' with another man who does NI while ur DH is not around makes me cringe. It sounds incredibly unsafe for a start, & it seems like ur donor is more interested in simply having sex than he is interested in helping a couple have a baby. And that just does not sit well with me personally. There are many things ill do to have a child, but having frequent sex with a stranger AND without my OH being there is just not something i would contemplate in a million years. However I'm well aware as a woman of 37yrs old that not everyone feels or thinks like I do- & I'm certainly not passing judgement on you-it's your choice & right to do NI. but it seems like you are walking a very fine line with ur situation & god forbid ur DH finds out ur spending time doing NI with this donor secretively? That could completely destroy your relationship. Surely if you are lonely while DH is away you shouldn't be looking to you donor for company? Particularly if he has his own family?

Im sorry if any of this sounds harsh. I am super conscious of any man taking advantage of or preying on women in any shape or form due to a tragic & devastating set of events which have occurred to a young woman in my city in the last 2 weeks. As a woman I would simply say to you, PLEASE PLEASE think carefully about what you are doing & whether you are being safe & responsible in your actions.

 

[ticking.clock]

Here is some pics of my lil girl