Considering at-home insemination with donor sperm...?

[Layla]

AF still hasnt arrived! Grrrr, I dont think i have ever been inpatient for it to come haha!

I have all the signs tho, bloated, moody, skin outbreak, hungry and sooo so tired. So fingers crossed it will be here in the next 2 days or so, then i can start charting

I am a bit worried about this time round, not because we are using a donor, but more to do with myself, Im 35 so my age goes against me now, Plus i do have PCOS, its never stopped me conceiving in the past but along side my age and the fact that im slightly over weight, im worried my chances are slim!

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[Layla]

How do you guys get your chart on your sig?

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[Nimyra]

I am officially out this month. BFN again this morning (12 DPO) and now I'm spotting and feel AF cramps coming on.

I feel like such a idiot for thinking this was going to be my month. Are we completely delusional? I also feel stupid for skipping my morning runs for the past 2 weeks just in case. I need to go for a run today.

Anyway. I just hope this works in good time. I'm going to give soy another go next month, but after that I'll be taking a break for a couple of months (I think).

Good luck to everyone still in the two week wait.

 

[firechild30]

I am officially out this month. BFN again this morning (12 DPO) and now I'm spotting and feel AF cramps coming on.

I feel like such a idiot for thinking this was going to be my month. Are we completely delusional? I also feel stupid for skipping my morning runs for the past 2 weeks just in case. I need to go for a run today.

Anyway. I just hope this works in good time. I'm going to give soy another go next month, but after that I'll be taking a break for a couple of months (I think).

Good luck to everyone still in the two week wait.

I go through the same disappointment each month when AF shows up, and I get so angry with myself for allowing myself to get my hopes up each and every time. this journey ostensibly a rough one! I think that its like this so that when we do get our babies that we can really appreciate the miracle that is life. I know its hard, but cling to your partner for comfort and find your strength together. it will continue to be upsetting if it is not successful , but when it finally is successful we will be so overcome with joy and happiness that all the sadness and anger will be forgotten. patience is the hardest thong to exercise through this journey, but we can do it.

AFM- work has been so busy that everything else has kinda taken a back seat. DH and I are discussing taking a break after this month. the holidays are so hectic and we want very badly to enjoy them together. this process has put a lot of strain on our relationship. and the clomid makes me very moody. we would begin again in Feb.

 

[Nimyra]

Firechild, where did you find your donor from?

I think we're going to try one more time with the current donor and then after a couple of month break may switch donors to hope for better luck.

 

[Nimyra]

F****** A! I was just verbally abused by some guy from one of the sperm donation sites because I said that I was finding him difficult to talk to and probably not a good match for us. He followed up with an email accusing me of having a personality disorder.

I put in a report to the site moderators, but I still feel dirty.

Why do some of these guys have to be such a**wipes? I had an issue with a donor we used 7 months or so ago (only for one cycle - one and only time I've been relieved I didn't get pregnant!)

Maybe this is a sign that I need to be patient with our current donor, who is really a fantastic guy.

 

[LeahMSta]

I'm sorry about the jerk. I hope that the site moderators give him the boot. I agree that if you have a great guy he is likely a better option. Our donor is amazing and kind. I tell people all of hte time that we can debate nature and nurture all day but I am delighted to know our bases are covered either way.

 

[Nimyra]

Thanks Leah,

I feel the same way about the nature/nurture bit. I'm really particular about wanting a donor who has good character because I tend to think that a lot of things are nature (genetics) and only a bit nurture. I'm happy to be wrong of course, but in case I'm right, I want to make sure we are on solid ground. Also, need a donor whom I'm happy having a kid turn out to be similar to, and whom I'd feel safe having my kid around. That's huge!

 

[LeahMSta]

Totally agree Nimyra. We agreed to have the donor stick around and be extended family to our little one. I can't imagine having to contend with a jerk. I know that our Donor will be an amazing role model and he's already agreed to tackle the challenge of a boy if we have one. I hope you have no further run ins like that last jerk.

 

[Babylove27]

Hi all I just wanted to stop in and say hi and introduce myself. I've been lurking this forum for a couple weeks now and thought I'd join My fiance and I are on our first cycle of ttc through at home insemination. Long story short, is that my fiance was strong-armed into having a vasectomy years ago by his ex-wife (ugh) and after spending over $4,000 on the reversal surgery, it has unfortunately failed Through lots of heartaches and long talks we had decided on using his brother as our donor. He happily agreed and from that point on we started tracking ovulation and preparing for this journey. Of course I have high hopes as well as doubts, but it would be so nice for this to happen the first time around lol. I hope no one minds me joining in once in awhile for advice and support and I look forward to getting to know everyone. Praying for lotsa for everyone!

 

[Babylove27]

Forgot to add...now on to my 2ww :srhug:

 

[LeahMSta]

Forgot to add...now on to my 2ww :srhug:

:wave: Welcome Babylove!
Hop on in. This is a wonderfully supportive and incredibly informative group of women. Feel free to ask questions and jump in whenever you feel like it. I think it is great that your BIL is willing to help you and your DH concieve. I'm sending buckets of babydust your way. We'll bein the 2ww right behind you.

 

[Babylove27]

Thank you so much LeahMSta! That's why I originally started searching for information on this forum, because everyone seemed so supportive and loving...like a family. =) I think it's great. Without naming sites, I unfortunately ran across quite a few with people simply asking how to start the process and people chiming in saying how disgusting AI is or how it's dangerous and unsuccessful and lesbians shouldn't be doing AI they should just be with a man if they want a baby and blah blah blah...just disgusting how ignorant and rude people can be. I'm pro love and support love in any way shape or form=) I know the success rate of it, and it is not dangerous if you are doing it correctly and staying out of the cervix...it was sad to read. It just gives others such a negative view on it if they don't know the truth. I'm very happy I found you all! Good luck in your 2 ww...it's my first time in the waiting game and I'm trying to be positive and keeping myself occupied and stress-free. Baby dust to you!! FX =)

 

[LeahMSta]

Thank you so much LeahMSta! That's why I originally started searching for information on this forum, because everyone seemed so supportive and loving...like a family. =) I think it's great. Without naming sites, I unfortunately ran across quite a few with people simply asking how to start the process and people chiming in saying how disgusting AI is or how it's dangerous and unsuccessful and lesbians shouldn't be doing AI they should just be with a man if they want a baby and blah blah blah...just disgusting how ignorant and rude people can be. I'm pro love and support love in any way shape or form=) I know the success rate of it, and it is not dangerous if you are doing it correctly and staying out of the cervix...it was sad to read. It just gives others such a negative view on it if they don't know the truth. I'm very happy I found you all! Good luck in your 2 ww...it's my first time in the waiting game and I'm trying to be positive and keeping myself occupied and stress-free. Baby dust to you!! FX =)

My DW is going to be the one with the bump in our family and at her latest fertility consult we went over in detail every step of our process. We do it a bit differently than some. Our donor puts the directly into a softcup, DW puts preseed around the cup to make insertion easier with a bit in the cup and she uses her finger to get the guys right against her cervix. Then lay down with hips up and pray the guys swim. We tried with a syringe and ....leakage....grossed DW out Our Dr JUST assured us that we are equally as likely as a fertile couple having intercourse to get a So...I say the skeptics are ! LOL! Welcome again. Delighted to have you.

 

[Babylove27]

We do the same way...well almost. BIL lives about 5 miles away so he produces sample into a sterile cup with lid just to avoid any uh ohs on the drive over lol. The first two days we tried inserting with syringe and following with instead cup but no matter what we did we had leakage. I know it's normal, but I just wanted to be able to utilize whatever sperm we had lol. Also, I agree with your DW the leakage is kinda gross ha ha. It seems more noticeable to me now then it ever did when me and my DF were doing the BD. =) Now we just pour sample into instead cup getting as much as possible, their usually isn't much left in specimen cup and we also use pre-seed on edge of instead cup and a slight amount inserted in me before instead cup. I then lay back on bed with hips still elevated for about an hour reading or watching tv. FX that it takes first cycle. Positive vibes to you & DW and everyone ttc

 

[Nimyra]

Welcome, Babylove!

Leah, I do it the same way. Piece of cake.

Had a good chat with my husband last night about the donor stuff and I'm feeling much better. My husband agreed that maybe it makes sense to give our current donor a really great shot and keep working with him even if it takes a while. We like him so much as a person and that really matters.

 

[LeahMSta]

I agree Nimyra. Having a good relationship with your donor is vital. I mean we need these men to be at our beck and call and to help us with one of the most amazing processes in the world. I don't know how the others feel but I think it is an intimate process and that requires someone you trust respect and maybe even like. Hahaha! Plus the nature vs. nurture conversation we had earlier. Heck, this month our donor picked up softcups for us on the way over for a donation. I like that we have that kind of relationship. I am glad that you and DH are on the same page.

Babylove, it sounds like you guys have a great little system going. I wish you the best of luck getting that eggy. What sorts of things do you plan on doing to get yourself through the 2ww? I have a couple boards on pintrest. Since this is our first we are trying to be as educated as possible so as I find products, parenting articles, even little outfits that I like I pin them to my board. I consider it preparing the biggest shopping list of my life. LOL!

3dpo and all is well. Hahahah! I got a pep talk about our not so perfect timing on my other threads so I am feeling a bit better about it. I can't believe that I goofed up on our last try before DW gets poked and prodded for further fertility testing. She was really trying to avoid it. The good thing is that we get progeterone checked at 7dpo and we will know if we have one in the oven before her u/s. So babydust all around!!! Lets bring some BFPs to this thread. It's been a while and we're about due. LOL!

 

[Babylove27]

Thank you so much for the warm welcome Nimyra. I am so glad to be on this site already! It's such a comforting feeling having people around that are in the same situation as you, it helps during this process. I agree with you LeahMsta about how it's such an intimate and even a sensitive process. I think that if you are happy with your donor and you really like them, then it's worth everything even if it does seem to take awhile. :wink: I lol'd at the donor picking up the softcups for you and your DW..it's such a sweet gesture, it just made me smile cuz our donor (my BIL) also ran out and got my OPK's this month lol. He was actually excited to get them and even paid for them. He was even oohing and aahing at the instead cups in Walmart about how cool they are lol. My fiance and I just stood there laughing. During my 2 WW I'm doing my two favorite things: cleaning and shopping! I know cleaning isn't enjoyed by very many people but I have anxiety and it's the one thing that I could fine to calm me down during anxiety attacks and such. Lol, strange I know. It allows me to focus on something else and keeps my mind off of what is making me anxious and it gives me a sense of accomplishment once it's over, so it's like a double whammy. I decided that since Christmas is in about 7 wks. that I should start my Xmas shopping for friends and family. Any excuse to go shopping. I don't really get to do it all that often so it was really nice. While in Walmart I tried to detour the baby section but the urge was too much so now I have a couple gender neutral clothes, blankets and some bottles lol. I'm hoping the baby is a girl because I could not resist the baby clearance rack with a bunch of outfits for $3! I found two little dresses that are the cutest things I've ever seen. Better be a a girl or I'm gonna have some explaining to do....ha ha! BFP's would be great to see for all! I get excited for everyone when I hear about new ones =)

 

[Mummylou23]

please can some one help me i need a donor for this week and i have found a perfect one on pride ange lbut dont get paid till next week so ican get credits does any one have an account with pridge angel and have credits and could mesg him for me with my email address if so can you please pm thanks so much would really appreciate it

 

[Layla]

i dont have an account on that site but i found mine on https://forums.tadpoletown.com/

Its free, worth a look?

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