DH troubles - any advice?

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - First Trimester' started by Jexer72, Oct 14, 2008.

  1. Jexer72

    Jexer72 Mummy of 1 DD

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    Hi, I'm a newbie - 7 weeks preggers after 2 years trying to conceive. I should be really excited and enjoying the whole experience but there is one problem...

    DH has changed his feelings along the way. He said we could try for a baby as he knew it was now or never (I'm 36) and he didn't want to lose me. It took us longer than expected and I guess he might have started to think it was never going to happen, but low and beyond a miracle occurred and I got my long awaited :bfp:

    Anyway to cut a long story short - DH is now acting very strange - almost recentful towards me. He won't talk about the baby at all and has stopped cuddling me and showing any affection. I feel very lonely and scared that I am going to go through this whole thing on my own (not physically as I am sure he'll always be by my side, just emotionally if you get what I mean).

    I have tried to talk to him and he has promised he will try to meet me half way but the thought of sleepless nights, a screaming baby and financial pressure is too much for him.

    I have been told that he will change when the baby comes along - I really hope so.

    Does anyone else's other half feel similar? :help:
     
  2. Jkelmum

    Jkelmum Well-Known Member

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    My last baby was with my hubby who isnt the father to my other two it was unplanned and he was great for aweek he couldnt do enough then that faded and he just wasnt interested in my pregnacy at all ....He never showed emotion at scans i felt so alone yet since the baby came he as been the best day ever and cried at the birth ....I am guessing its harder for them for it to seem real as nothing is happening to there body and also remember your hormones may make things seem worse ...i have told him he best be better this time but by judgin the no reaction after tellin him i was preggers i guesin he will be same again though I hope not
    xxx
     
  3. Rumpskin

    Rumpskin Free to try again!

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    My OH is being very matter of fact about this pregnancy - maybe this is because I mc in the previous one. He has not really shown much emotion at all but am hoping that he will do at the scan.

    xxx
     
  4. Jexer72

    Jexer72 Mummy of 1 DD

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    Thanks for your help ladies. I had a long chat with DH yesterday and today there appears to be a small change in him - he is making more of an effort in asking for kisses etc.

    I think his attitude will change when the baby is born - I can't make him feel feelings that just aren't there. :shrug:
     
  5. Cariad_bach

    Cariad_bach mum to 2 boys and 2 girls

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    I think some men can feel quite scared and left out because its all happening inside you where they cant see/help etc,

    Theres also that whole man thing of them mentally retreating in to there 'cave' (bless men youve gotta love them lol)

    I hope he gets his act together for you hun, he may just need a bit of time to get his head around it all xxxxxx
     
  6. amelia222

    amelia222 Well-Known Member

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    I know exactly what you mean, OH was excited at the scan and the next day, but now he's gone back to acting like nothing's changes. He's tired, feels sick, back hurts! I think they just have no clue what we're going through.
     

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