Disco Derail! - TTCAL/PAL Discussion and Support!

[NatoPMT]

My neighbours are Cypriot and the daughter is vegetarian. She has a baby boy a week older than Eloise and he is the current Chubbiest Cheek 2012 title holder - his are Penny and Eloise's added together. I think he is storing lentils in them.

i did wonder. i thought you'd gone cold on the celebrity gossip grapevine

Happy Easter everyone. the word Easter is derived from about 5000 different places if google is to be believed, but all linked to fertility, new dawns, eggs and oestrogen. The easter basket is supposed to symbolise the uterus with eggs in.

This is our bank holiday!!! Easter dust to all.

 

[Allie84]

Happy Easter to you too, Nato (and everyone). I had no idea about the origins of the Easter basket. Very apt for our group.

I hope everyone had a good day. We went to church and then spent the evening with friends (another couple with a toddler) and had Thai. A very unconventional day, but Alistair got his first Easter basket.

Cesca, no one would ever think you're a bad mummy! I really appreciate your tips!

I'm exhausted but I have a recent story about feeling like a 'bad mommy.' As you know my parents cause me a lot of stress and drama with my mom's mental illness. Yesterday I was crying while on the phone to my mom and she was screaming at me so I eventually lost it and yelled back....and I rarely ever yell at anyone...WHILE I was breastfeeding Alistair and he started to cry! He was content, feeding, and then I got progressively more upset and within a few seconds I raised my voice and he looked at me afraid and burst into tears! I cannot believe I made my child cry. I was so upset about that. Of course, as soon as I realized he was crying I pulled myself together,put on a smile and a reassuring voice, put him in his crib with his mobile and went into the hall to cry. I felt so badly and so guilty...he probably thought I was yelling at HIM, not my mom.

 

[LucyJ]

everyone I'm back from parents had a lovely time it was so good for Benjamin to have time with his grandparents think hes missing them today as he's in a right grump. He's loved having loads of space at my parents which has really developed his crawling hes still commando crawling but using his knees more so wont be long before hes off hes quick enough as it is help!! He gets up on his knees and hands and rocks but hasnt got the balance to be able to move forward so he drops to his tummy and pulls himself along with is arms and legs. He's also started sitting his balance is much better although not great as I discovered today as I was gettin cushions to go around him and he fell over and hit the floor very hard bad mummy should of put the cushions down first.

Cecsa you are not a bad mum Luca is very lucky to have you and you are doing the best by him. Benjamin isn't sleeping through the night yet but we have started to be stricter with him and have been doing pick up/put down sometimes we let him cry we dont let him get really distressed but sometimes he'll have a big cry and then just go off before we would of gone to him. Its just finding what suits for you and your baby I'm learning more and more to trust my instincts my mums always says to me you know your baby so trust yourself and shes right. Although I quite often ring her for advice.

Vicky sorry the flat was no good hope you find somewhere soon that is perfect for your little family.

Nato my dad would have a meltdown if I said benjamin was going to be a vegetarian actually so would steve he like vegtables as long as they come with meat I'm glad John is on board my sil is a vegetarin and my niece doesnt eat meat with her mum but she does when she's with her dad as they are now separated.

Allie your not a bad mummy you were just reacting to the situation Alistair will of forgotten it. I did the same with Benjamin but I yelled at steve and his little face just crumbled (Benjamins not steve's ) but then he was all smiles. Im sorry things with your mum are so stressfull hope it eases up for you must be so hard.

Jen good to hear your all settled in.

Spoiler

Pictures of my little boy enjoying his food mummy's spag bol, scrabbled egg & toast and a yoghurt, playing with his stacking cups nd chatting.

 

[hoping:)]

It is so sad and scary to hear some of us have known a baby to die from SIDS. No parent should ever have to go through that and have their innocent baby ripped away from them I was reading the other day that women who suffer from Munchausen syndrome are responsible for a good handful of SIDS related deaths (not that this has anything to do with those who had close friends/family who have had to deal with it but I thought it was interestin). The article said that SIDS is sometimes an easy out for these mothers and usually authorities don’t realize it because no one wants to accuse a mother of something so heinous. I’m not sure how true that is but it was interesting. There was one woman the article discussed who had Munchausen and had lost 3 children from “SIDS.” It wasn’t until she lost her 4th child that authorities started to ask questions. Horrible!

Nato- it is so great to hear from you! I’m glad to hear that little Eloise of yours is thriving. I’m thinking that Penny will be vegetarian as well. Tim & I are mostly vegetarian so I think it should work out well. If Penny decides she wants to eat meat later on I would be ok with that as well as long as it is her choice. Your child’s diet is such a huge responsibility… I hope we do right by Penny.

That is crazy that your drinking buddy was in a relationship with Adele! Feel free to PM your gossip. You definitely hang out with some interesting crowds! I’m so jealous you used to work for Cosmo

I can’t believe some one has out cheeked Eloise & Penny… I have to see a picture of this little chubster!

Lucy- happy 8 months to Ben! Thank you for sharing pictures... he sure is a handsome little guy

Vicky- happy house hunting! I had to LOL about Hero eating the fur. I left Penny alone for like 30 seconds and came back to find her licking some of Tim’s paper work. When I took it away from her she had black ink on her lips and dress

Jenny- it is so amazing to see your DH’s face light up when he feels his baby kick. I’m glad you guys are all settled!

Cesca- we sleep trained Penny pretty much the same way. A good bedtime routine is key and has made it much easier to adjust. I usually give Penny her last bottle of the day in her room. I will read her a book & change her diaper. Next I swaddle her (always arms out) and I turn on her turtle star projector. I lay on the floor with her and talk to her while we star gaze and then I sing her a song… the same song every night. It goes like this (from the Hunger Games):

Spoiler

Deep in the meadow
Under the willow
A patch of grass
A soft green pillow
Lay down your head and close your sleepy eyes
& when again they open the sun will rise
Here it is safe, here it is warm
Here the owls guard you from every harm
This is where your dreams are sweet and tomorrow brings them true
This is the place where I love you

Allie- don’t feel like a bad mother! You are good to him and he knows you love him. He was probably just startled. You and I are very similar when it comes to our parents. I can’t help but worry and get too emotionally involved. I told Tim I would like to see a hypnotherapist to help me detach from them a little because it causes me great anxiety. I have an entry in my journal where we startled Penny and she started bawling her little eyes out. Short story: Tim and I were playing around and ended up having a food fight with formula. We were giggling uncontrollably and Penny got upset by how loud we were being. I’m not sure if she thought we were fighting or she was just mad because we wasted her formula but we felt so bad and gave her cuddles… she started smiling shortly after

AFM: We had an exhausting, crazy but delightful weekend. My parents, sisters & niece and nephew came to visti us for easter. We had lots of laughs, ate great food and even packed in a trip to the Aquarium which the kids LOVED... I will update my journal with pictures later. The stressful part was that I learned some horrible things about my little sister. It makes me sick to my stomach thinking about it I feel so awful for my parents and wish I could straiten her out or at least take away their pain.

 

[NatoPMT]

am having a total tantrum. Just wrote a massive reply and it got eaten.

Jen's husband is due round to collect a wardrobe so i dont have time to retype.

but the jist was Allie, dont worry traumatic events aren't so emotionally indelible if they are followed by being comforted.

Luce loving the individual travelling style

Hoping, penny with ink on her face sounds adorable - dont worry you will do right by her and working at Cosmo was a nightmare. will fb you unpublic gossip

afm: i might be meeting norge / amy soon as she needs some midweek company and might come to london for doing lunch and shopping stuff with la Nato et la eloise.

<swearwordsateatenpost>

 

[vickyd]

Hey all!

Today Hero ate a bead from her shirt at soft play. I almost fainted as images of it ripping through her bowels flashed before my eyes. The woman in charge must have thought i was a complete loon and im pretty sure she rolled her eyes at me, although from the pamic everything was a blur so i could have imagined the rolling eyes bit. Obviously i called the paed and he asked how big the bead was,my responce"the sixe of a large lentil". nato you have me thinking of lentils all day long, everything is now compared to a lentil lol!

Hoping i like the sound of your wind down routine, do you both ly on the floor or just you? I sing "tomorrow" from the musical Annie everynight. It kinda stuck from when she was in NICU and I felt awful that she had to spend nights away from me. Everyday i was hopeful we would get discharged hence the importance of "tomorrow".

nato have fun with Amy, tell her we miss her on B&B!

 

[heart tree]

I&#8217;m loving all the mommy advice. I have no idea what philosophy I&#8217;ll follow. I think a lot of it depends on the baby. But reading how you all are rearing your children give me a lot of things to think about. Cesca, I wouldn&#8217;t judge you or any other mother (unless she was beating her child or something of that sort). I think each parent has to do what is right for them and their baby.

I&#8217;m not looking forward to people telling me to parent a certain way. I know it will happen though. I expect Tim&#8217;s mom to be very vocal about our parenting style.

Vic, I hope you find a good apartment soon. It&#8217;s not easy to find anything good here either, so I can relate. I think Hero is ok. She&#8217;s not choking. You&#8217;ll just find the bead in her poop. My little brother ate a heart shaped locket of mine when he was a baby. I didn&#8217;t even know it was missing until my mother found it in his diaper. Needless to say, I wasn&#8217;t interested in it anymore. I think I&#8217;ve mentioned this to you all. My step-father was a pediatrician and from Spain so sometimes there was a language disconnect even though he was fluent in English. My sister called him one time because her daughter ate a candy called a Lifesaver. (Not sure if they are an American candy). My niece was choking and my sister was panicking. My step-father could not understand what my sister was talking about. He kept asking, &#8220;she&#8217;s choking on a lifesaver? What&#8217;s a lifesaver?&#8221; It is a bit of an oxymoron that you could die from something called a lifesaver! By the time my sister could explain through her hysterics, the candy had dissolved and my niece was fine!

I love the Easter symbolism Nato. I&#8217;m not religious, but do enjoy that this holiday came from a Pagan holiday that represented fertility. I&#8217;m very curious for the Adele story. That article wasn&#8217;t very juicy. Have fun with Amy! I met her last year.

Allie, it&#8217;s bound to happen. Yelling happens. Babies cry. He&#8217;ll forget about it. You&#8217;re a wonderful mom! It sounds like you need to talk to your mom on the phone when you aren&#8217;t holding him, just in case.

Lucy, I love the pics! Your boy is so gorgeous. Glad you had a good time with your parents.

Hoping, my mother told me the same thing about SIDS. A large part of it is thought to be unreported infanticide. Crazy. Of course I &#8216;m quite certain that&#8217;s not always the case. So sad. I love your bed time routine. I&#8217;m going to have a look at your pics from the weekend.

Not much to report from me. Just lying on the couch. Having some down days, but trying to stay positive. I&#8217;m having a lot of Braxton Hicks contractions which worry me. But they aren&#8217;t painful and happen intermittently, so I&#8217;m trying not to worry. I see my doctor on Friday and am doing the glucose screening test. Then my next cervix scan is on Monday.

 

[NatoPMT]

i meant to say about the wind down routine too, it sounds like a real proper one. i dont really have one. i should pay attention and start pulling my bedtime routine socks up

Vic thats lovely, really sweet (the Tomorrow bit). The lentil bit is hilarious. 'Six lentils' hahaha

I HATE eye rolling. If that bitch wants to roll her eyes i will poke her in them. Hero is ok though?

The whole wardrobe situation developed into a total fiasco. The wardrobes were too big to get out of the house, i have no idea how we got them in. Poor Jen's husband took about 2 hours trying to get them out

He's a real sweetie Jen, very softy spoken compared to my big mouth.

 

[heart tree]

Oh no Nato! Have you even met Jen yet? Now you've had a solid 2 hours with her husband! Good thing he's soft spoken. My husband would have been very vocal about that situation!

 

[prgirl_cesca]

but we have started to be stricter with him and have been doing pick up/put down sometimes we let him cry we dont let him get really distressed but sometimes he'll have a big cry and then just go off before we would of gone to him.

That's exactly it. I remember one bad night just being at my wits end and just lying in bed with the covers over my face trying to block out the screaming and just like that, BOOM, he was asleep after maybe 20 seconds of screaming when I left the room?! The little tinker!!

Found out today that the girl I knew who had the SIDS baby had a miscarriage late last year She had 2 MC before their son. Honestly I couldn't handle that. It's weird because although if I have another baby I will technically be PAL - I suppose I won't feel as panicky because I knew I have carried a baby to term and i'd be less concerned about miscarrying. Suppose you're never out of the woods are you?

 

[vickyd]

Is he still trying to get the wardrobe out two hours later???? Alex would have stopped trying 30 minutes into it!!!

Hearty MIL's love to give baby advice so prepare yourself!! Mine is obsessed with the fact that i let Hero go barefoot in the house all the time. Apparently the feet are the number one route to catching a cold....????!!!!!

 

[NatoPMT]

hearty i had very strong BH from about 20 weeks. used to freak me out too - are you still on bedrest? how is the cervical length shaping up? I got to 39+4 with my massive BH's but my GP did say i might not go overdue because of how strong my bh's were, but i think i looked online in response to that and couldnt find anything to support that but cant remember, everyone has bh from 17 weeks its just whether you feel them

cold through the feet, oh yes thats a well known problem for barefooted babies <nods>

maybe an hour and a half. i wandered off and left them to it. i have no stamina. i felt really bad, john wasnt here cos he was having an operation on his knee and i was worse than useless.

i have forgotten what else i was going to say.

nursery coming on nicely. i will post photos right now.

as usual i am struggling with photos so will have to put them on fb if youre interested bahh

 

[LucyJ]

Vicky hope Hero is alright I dread Benjamin eating things he shouldnt although he already is he decided eating my dads newspaper would be a good idea My nephew got a raisin stuck up his nose of his parents didnt realise untill 2 days later when he sneezed and it came flying out!! Your mil wouldnt like being at my house Benjamin is quite often in bare feet unless he has a babygrow on.

Oh no Nato did he have to dismantle it, bless him. Look forward to seeing nursery pics we are just doing the finishing touches to Benjamins room. Have a great time with Amy.

Cesca thats so sad I dont know how you get through something like that poor girl.

Loving all the wind down routines ours isnt perfect but we try to stick to it its the timing for us that can be a bit hit and miss. Steve baths Benjamin and gets him ready for bed then they do a story normally the same one then I feed him in our room and put him to bed Ive started singing twinkle twinkle little star I used to sing away in the manger which he loves I sang it alot over christmas but seems odd singing a carol in april.

Thanks for all the lovely comments on the pics I've got some video of him which I've managed to get onto my laptop and will post on fb tomorrow as not sure how to post videos on b&b.

Hearty I got BH from about 23/24 weeks it really scared me the first few times as didnt know what they were then I found out you can have them from 16 weeks but not all women feel them. Hope your scan goes well your bound to have down days its a scary time being pal but hopefully the good days will out weigh the bad.

 

[NatoPMT]

you just reminded me what i said in my eaten post Luce, that i think i can tell what Ben is going to look like as an adult, you can see the shape of his eyes and how he will mature i think. There is the loveliest little boy at my play group who looks like Ben. Think his mum is confused as to why i make such a fuss of him

haha yes he had to pull it apart. i hope it survived the trauma.

and i got a blue bead stuck up my nose when i was about 4. I didn't dare tell anyone and left it up there.

 

[heart tree]

Nato, I thought the same thing about Ben. You can totally tell what he's going to look like as an adult! He's going to be a heart breaker!

The BH are scaring me, especially because of the cervix. I am still on bed rest. I won't know if it is helping until Monday when they do another scan. I can feel the baby kicking my cervix all the time and I don't like it. Tim had a word with her. Told her to move up into my belly. She listened for a second and then went back down to kicking it. Cheeky baby.

Vicky, I'm lucky that the MIL doesn't live near us, so she can't criticize too much!

Off to go look at FB photos of the nursery.

 

[jenny25]

Awww nato Paul has totally fallen for eloise he said she is so cute Awweee we have just gotten the wardrobe together and it was a bit of a struggle lol there is about an inch or so from the roof I'm like wow it's so snazzy an he said to say your cool and hope hubby gets better soon and I personally want to thank you Paul is well chuffed xxx

18 weeks in 9 min woo hooo xx

I don't know if any of you watch daybreak but there was a bit for health Heros I've nominated my brevement midwife for it and I had a call back today saying we have a strong case so it will be next week before we find out either way xx

 

[heart tree]

I hope your midwife gets it Jen. That's so awesome.

I love that Paul, Nato and Eloise hung out. We need to see pics of the wardrobe in its new home. Happy 18 weeks!!!

 

[Allie84]

Hello everyone,

Ahhh, what a wardrobe adventure! I'm glad it got put together and it's cool Nato, Eloise and Paul got to meet. Nato, ss John okay? Surgery?

AND you're meeting Amy! And you've met Vicky and Sugar...I'm really quite jealous about these meetups and lamenting the fact that I didn't go to London last month when I was in the UK, and that I didn't meet Hearty when I was in the same metropolitan area. So close...yet so far. Ha.

Hoping, we must meet this summer when I'm in the Springs! I'm probably going to my high school reunion. Hahahaha, that should be a hoot. But I can't resist...and I loved high school. My life is kind of lame now (Alistair aside, of course) and I sometimes wonder if I'm one of those people who peaked at 18 when everything was rosy and I was in my prime and it's been downhill ever since? I sure hope not!

Happy 19 weeks, Jen!

Lucy, Ben is a beauty. He's so cute. I can see what Hearty and Nato are saying about him as an adult. Awww. I can just picture him crawling. Looking forward to a FB video!

Hearty, I can't remember when I had BH, but I know I had them. I was quite crampy around the gestation you're at. I remember Googling cramps all the time and worrying about preterm labor and everything was just fine. Hang in there...you are so nearly in 3rd tri, it's crazy!

Thank you for the reassurance re: my making Alisitair cry. I'm so glad I'm not the only one and it's just one of those things.

Hoping, yes, our relationships with our parents sound very similar. I tried just regular old therapy back in 2010 to try to help with my dynamic with my parents but it didn't work. I'm very intruiged by your hypnotherapy idea. I would LOVE to be able to be a bit more emotionally detached. I know my level of involvement is unhealthy and I hate how anxious I always am about them. Let me know if you find anyting else out about the hypnotherapy....

Vicky, you'll see that bead soon lol. What did the doctor say?

Cesca, that is so sad. Life just isn't fair sometimes. BTW I can picture myself hiding under the covers waiting for Alistair to stop crying lol.

Hero, I love the Hunger Games. Im reading Catching Fire right now, actually. Which tune do you use for the song

Oooh, I love hearing the bedtime routines.

We have a pretty set routine. First, it's diaper, baby massage and pajamas. Then it's story, breastfeeding followed by Alex giving formula, and then I sing the same 4 songs and say a prayer with Alistair before rocking him to sleep. He usually goes down well but we've cut out the swaddle which had made it a bit more challenging.

 

[heart tree]

Thanks Allie. I get crampy but not during the contractions. It's so nerve wracking.

You need to meet a disco girl! Next time you are here we have to meet up!

You still have tons of life in front of you! You are in a particular pattern right now, but life hasn't peaked for you yet.

 

[jenny25]

I will take pics but I've not decorated our room yet we have done the livig room hall and aarrons room still got the bathroom kitchen and our room too do but I think I'm going to b&q today we finally got the decorating vouchers from the housing assosation that's after we forked out the paint anther for everywhere else x