Do you ever wish that the women who fought to be able to work hadn't?

[NellyLou]

Don't get me wrong, I love my job. I just sometimes feel that if I had the choice I would prefer to stay home with my children until they go to school. Do you think if women years ago hadn't fought to be allowed to work that maybe families would still be able to make ends meet on one income? I work as an engineer in a male dominated career so obviously I am ultimately thankful for what the women before us accomplished. But where I live the cost of living is so high that we really have no option but to both work.

 

[chell5544]

Yes and no I see where your coming from but on the other hand women fought for equal pay we have always had to work when the men weren't getting paid enough to support his family, had left his wife and children or even died in an accident/illness. I think in an ideal world minimal wage should cover living costs to allow the choice.

 

[NellyLou]

OH yeah, that is very true. I have the idealistic view of moms in the 50s going to each others houses for tea while the kids play lol. It would be nice if everyone could survive on minimum wage. We both have great jobs and it's still hard. I have no idea how people on min. wage survive!

 

[overcomer79]

not with the cost of living

 

[Pearls18]

No, I would be one of the ones campaigning hard core if we still didn't have rights nowadays. I appreciate the choice, I choose to work. In the military with the cost of living so low there are a lot more SAHMs than on civvy street I'd guess, not for me. Or my mum. Or my grandmother. My grandmother would have killed for my life.

 

[NellyLou]

Yeah, I see what you mean MarineWAG. I just feel like it's gone too far the other way. I don't have the choice to stay home with my kids. There is no way we could just live on my husband's salary, and he makes good money.

 

[socitycourty]

I would never wish that, because that was also times when women were second class citizens, IMO.

I'm a SAHM right now but TBH I miss working at times and also being responsible for myself, I'm not 100% comfortable not making any income.

 

[robinator]

I'd never wish that, as I got to have my dream career in a field dominated by men. But I understand what you're saying.

 

[Pearls18]

How do you mean too far the other way? I think it's good the pressure is off men to do all the earning, I know it feels financially tough ATM but we have a much better standard of living than those in the 1950s, better workers rights for all- holiday pay, maternity pay, sick pay etc, access to holidays, gadgets etc more than they did in the 1950s, generally.

 

[NellyLou]

I just mean that now so many families don't have a choice to have one parent stay home. I certainly don't mean I want everything else the same as the 50s lol. I don't seriously wish they hadn't fought for equality, I just sometimes wonder what it would be like if it wasn't financially necessary for most households to need two incomes to live.

 

[Pearls18]

I just mean that now so many families don't have a choice to have one parent stay home. I certainly don't mean I want everything else the same as the 50s lol. I don't seriously wish they hadn't fought for equality, I just sometimes wonder what it would be like if it wasn't financially necessary for most households to need two incomes to live.

I know what you mean I think it's more to do with the fact we have more to pay out for these days though rather than the expectation of women working iykwim, back in the 50s life was much simpler, housing was much cheaper relatively speaking as well, diets weren't very exciting, I don't think people necessarily commuted as much as they do nowadays, there wasn't all the fashion labels, pressure from the media, technological gadgets, so I think people lived more comfortably on one wage back then than we would now. Now rent/mortgages are high, we have satellite TV, plethora of brand name clothes, expensive food prices, the need for cars and high fuel prices, keeping up with the Jones' mentality. I for one could be a SAHM if I was happy to not go on holiday, have few and far between days out, spend little on my self and DS and eat really blandly...but that isn't the life I want for us, so yeah I guess I feel more pressure for a double income to have the life we want rather than to afford the basics which I imagine is the case for lots of others too. So I totally understand what you're saying I think instead of saying about women's rights I would be asking for 'simpler times' again because I think it was our lives getting more complicated that caused more expectations from women (I like a busy life though! But I know what you mean I used to think this back in my early twenties when all I wanted was a family but I felt like I was expected to go to uni and have a thriving career or I'd be wasting myself, so wished for times like my nan had, but I don't think that now)

 

[Scottish mum]

I love that us women work and raise family just shows we are hard working independant women!! There is nothing more saticfying : ) x

 

[xemmax]

Women have always worked, they fought for the right to jobs which were previously only assigned to men. They fought for education, occupation, pay, and the fight is still ongoing. They never won the 'right' to work, they had victories in equal opportunities that enabled them to work and earn as men did. You have to put these victories in context - women were treated terribly back then. There was no freedom.

In that respect, of course I wouldn't wish people hadn't fought for those rights - I can't imagine living in such a misogynistic society.

 

[NellyLou]

I just mean that now so many families don't have a choice to have one parent stay home. I certainly don't mean I want everything else the same as the 50s lol. I don't seriously wish they hadn't fought for equality, I just sometimes wonder what it would be like if it wasn't financially necessary for most households to need two incomes to live.

I know what you mean I think it's more to do with the fact we have more to pay out for these days though rather than the expectation of women working iykwim, back in the 50s life was much simpler, housing was much cheaper relatively speaking as well, diets weren't very exciting, I don't think people necessarily commuted as much as they do nowadays, there wasn't all the fashion labels, pressure from the media, technological gadgets, so I think people lived more comfortably on one wage back then than we would now. Now rent/mortgages are high, we have satellite TV, plethora of brand name clothes, expensive food prices, the need for cars and high fuel prices, keeping up with the Jones' mentality. I for one could be a SAHM if I was happy to not go on holiday, have few and far between days out, spend little on my self and DS and eat really blandly...but that isn't the life I want for us, so yeah I guess I feel more pressure for a double income to have the life we want rather than to afford the basics which I imagine is the case for lots of others too. So I totally understand what you're saying I think instead of saying about women's rights I would be asking for 'simpler times' again because I think it was our lives getting more complicated that caused more expectations from women (I like a busy life though! But I know what you mean I used to think this back in my early twenties when all I wanted was a family but I felt like I was expected to go to uni and have a thriving career or I'd be wasting myself, so wished for times like my nan had, but I don't think that now)

Great point! We have so many 'extras' now... Internet, cable, phones, cells... I guess we live in a much more materialistic world now!

 

[Jess137]

I would love to have the option to be a SAHM, but I wouldn't want to go back to a time like the 50's - women were second class citizens. I think feminism is awesome and very important.

 

[Kate&Lucas]

I think it depends on how you live. We live on one income - mine - because we don't have a choice. We live in a diddy house in an area with a bad reputation, we don't have a big TV or Ipads (we don't even have flooring in a lot of the house but if I'd budgeted better we probably could have by now). I'm on minimum wage atm and work part-time, and we just get by.
I'd rather have two incomes and live in a nicer house in a nicer area with more luxuries but that's not a choice I have. I'd hate to think what situation I'd be in now if our mothers and grandmothers hadn't fought so hard for equality.

 

[Rhi_Rhi1]

I like having choice =)

 

[xsadiex]

I'd never wish that because we should be equal. But I do think being a stay at home mum needs to be a more respected choice.

 

[lhancock90]

I like having the power of being able to choose.

 

[sue_88]

No, I'd never wish that.

I adore my job and am very thankful to be in the position I am with my career. And given the fact me and my OH(FOB) are no longer together, to know that I am still very comfortable and have enough money to raise my daughter in a very comfortable lifestyle feels great.

I'd have it no other way!