Do you leave your baby to cry?

[mumoffive]

My baby is only a week old but she just loves being held atm. I am just wondering if you think that this might turn into a bad habit later on? Or is it ok to do it at this young age? I ask cause my ds was a nightmare baby. I think i caused it cause every time he made a sound or cried i ran to pick him up in fear that he would wake my dd. He cried and cried most of the time and was largely an unsettled baby. Assuming that baby is fed, changed and happy...what do you do when your baby cries? Do you leave her/him? Just curious!

 

[Sarah10]

I just cuddle him for comfort xxx

 

[KatieB]

It might be making a "rod for your own back" but I can't leave my DS crying. I tried it a few days ago for a couple of minutes but it was awful and I rushed to him. I do know that he is a terror for falling asleep in our arms and hates waking up on his own but I figure that at 10 weeks that is normal - he is a baby and loves to be held. I'm just going to make the most of it while he is so little. I think some babies do settle better than others x

 

[going_crazy]

Noooooooo..... don't leave babies that young to cry!!!

If they're fed/changed etc then all they want is their mummy cuddles!!! You will NOT be "making a rod for your own back" (have heard this so many times!) xxx

 

[going_crazy]

It might be making a rod for your own back but I can't leave my DS crying. I tried it a few days ago for a couple of minutes but it was awful and I rushed to him. I do know that he is a terror for falling asleep in our arms and hates waking up on his own but I figure that at 10 weeks that is normal - he is a baby and loves to be held. I think some babies do settle better than others x

Sorry, didn't aim anything at you... we posted at the same time!

 

[freckleonear]

Your baby is so little, she's been inside you for 9 months and now she's alone in a strange scary world. When she cries it's because she NEEDS you. Leaving babies to cry has been shown to cause long term emotional harm, so please don't worry about picking her up. You can't spoil her or cause bad habits by showing her love and meeting her needs.

 

[bubbles]

I cuddle them. You can't spoil a child or create bad habits with love and comfort. Put yourself in her position, she has been tucked up warm and close to mummy for 8+months then thrust into a cold and unfamiliar place. She needs to feel safe and you are her safety. Any form of sleep training isn't recommended befor at LEAST 6months, personally I would never recommend it (numerous studies have shown it has a negative impact)

Please don't take that the wrong way Some babies sleep well some don't. My 2 are polar opposites

 

[shambaby]

honestly, hayden has never been much of a crier and is generally pretty content, but i wouldn't leave such a young baby to cry - they need cuddles for comfort, and i think all they will learn if you don't is that mummy won't come if they cry, and i think that's pretty sad

 

[KatieB]

Sorry, didn't aim anything at you... we posted at the same time! [/QUOTE]

No worries, it was the expression a friend used with me, she said I was spoiling him by holding him all the time and I took exception to it x

 

[anna matronic]

A week old? No way x

 

[beccybobeccy]

Your baby is very young and does not know how to manipulatively cry for attention (yet)!

Your baby ONLY has this cry to tell you something is wrong at the moment. Hunger, Temperature, Dirty nappy, tired, bored, want comfort...

I'd rather be a rod maker than ever leave my LO to cry... Just my opinion.

 

[Dizzymum]

The more cuddles the better. I never leave my Lo to cry, just couldn't do it.

Your Baby is absolutely gorgeous BTW x

 

[mumoffive]

I dont actually leave her to cry, especially at this young age. I just wondered what others did really. I do agree that she is very little and she is just brand new in a scary world so dont have a problem picking her up. I was just a bit worried about learned behaviour.
Personally, i dont agree with the emotional harm argument. I have raised 3 sons who were all left to cry at some point in their lives [ not at a very young age though] and they are well balanced boys with no issues.

 

[Broodypants]

I never leave my little girl to cry, I just can't do it! I don't care if she just wants some attention, she's still only little at ten months old - she needs attention she will have it

Shower her with as many cuddles and as much love as you possibly can, I promise you you won't regret it!

xx

 

[shimmy]

Ive never let my baby cry, he was always held at that age or in bed with us.
Hes now 8 weeks and I've just posted because hes been sleeping solid (on his own) for four and a half hours!!!
Just hold her and love her, its all she wants xxx

 

[mumoffive]

Thank you for everyones replies. I treasure every moment i have with her and cuddle her cause she is my last baby and i know how quickly she will grow

 

[Baby France]

You can't 'spoil' a newborn? A newborn doesn't know how to manipulate an adult? A newborn cries because its wants food, is too cold, too warm or just wants a big cuddle from their mum

I think when they're a bit older i.e. 8-10 months that they realise that when they cry you'll go to them or when they drop something from the high chair, you'll always pick it up (so they can do it again!) <<< when that happens thats when I think you could start spoiling them!

 

[mumoffive]

You can't 'spoil' a newborn? A newborn doesn't know how to manipulate an adult? A newborn cries because its wants food, is too cold, too warm or just wants a big cuddle from their mum

I think when they're a bit older i.e. 8-10 months that they realise that when they cry you'll go to them or when they drop something from the high chair, you'll always pick it up (so they can do it again!) <<< when that happens thats when I think you could start spoiling them!

Yes i agree, when they are older they definetly learn how to work it!!!

 

[Cattia]

Now that I have two I have found there are times when I have to leave George to cry for a few minutes if i am in the middle of doing something with Abigail like her bath. I hate hearing him cry and always hey to him as fast as I can but when you only have one pair of hands sometimes one or the other of yhem has to be kept waiting a few minutes! That is one of the main differences between the first and second baby in my experience, I was always able to give Abigail my full attention as soon as she wanted it. I hope it won't affect George having to wait a few minutes now and then.

 

[mumoffive]

Now that I have two I have found there are times when I have to leave George to cry for a few minutes if i am in the middle of doing something with Abigail like her bath. I hate hearing him cry and always hey to him as fast as I can but when you only have one pair of hands sometimes one or the other of yhem has to be kept waiting a few minutes! That is one of the main differences between the first and second baby in my experience, I was always able to give Abigail my full attention as soon as she wanted it. I hope it won't affect George having to wait a few minutes now and then.

Yes, i totally agree. When you have other children its not always possible to give undivided attention all of the time. x