Do you think having a Natural and Homebirth section on BnB is utimately a good thing?

[Bournefree]

Double post

 

[pinkmonki]

I worried about getting lynched somewhat too, but mostly I'm ignored haha.

Anyways, reading back over my post, I seem to have missed the point completely and just ranted so err.. I like that this bit is separate. In my experience the majority don't want to hear the voices of the minority and those that do, will seek out and find this section.

A friend of mine recently told me that mothers often self judge themselves when comparing their choices to others, and that my choices can often make those who opt for all the drugs, formula etc feel like their choices are wrong. So perhaps that explains a lot. Again, it pisses me off though because I NEVER judge other mothers choices. Not because I'm some all encompassing, love every woman type earth mother.. But simply because I don't give a damn! My choices are just that. Mine! I make them because they are what fits best for me, not because I think I'm doing the most 'right' thing.

Hell, at the end of the day no matter what we choose do do as mothers, surely our ultimate goal is the same thing.. Not to raise glue-sniffing gobshites that become serial killers.. No? Ah, that's just my fear then?! Lol.

 

[Jenniflower]

I worried about getting lynched somewhat too, but mostly I'm ignored haha.

Anyways, reading back over my post, I seem to have missed the point completely and just ranted so err.. I like that this bit is separate. In my experience the majority don't want to hear the voices of the minority and those that do, will seek out and find this section.

A friend of mine recently told me that mothers often self judge themselves when comparing their choices to others, and that my choices can often make those who opt for all the drugs, formula etc feel like their choices are wrong. So perhaps that explains a lot. Again, it pisses me off though because I NEVER judge other mothers choices. Not because I'm some all encompassing, love every woman type earth mother.. But simply because I don't give a damn! My choices are just that. Mine! I make them because they are what fits best for me, not because I think I'm doing the most 'right' thing.

Hell, at the end of the day no matter what we choose do do as mothers, surely our ultimate goal is the same thing.. Not to raise glue-sniffing gobshites that become serial killers.. No? Ah, that's just my fear then?! Lol.

Someone asked me that once "Don't you feel like you're making every other mother who had an Epi feel bad about themselves?" My response was I can't make any person feel a certain way. It's their choice to feel the way they feel. And in my opinion someone who does feel that way would feel that way with or without my birth experience and is something they need to work out with out dragging me into their drama.

 

[indigo_fairy]

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[Beanbabe]

Girls although i never post in this section I lurk constantly. I would love to have the options that some of you have to give birth to my baby.

I love it in here and although I know that my baby will be born in hospital I am going to try to take some of what I have learned here to the labour ward with me. I also know that I will most probably be induced but once I get into labour I want it to be as natural as possible if that makes any sense.

This section is fantastic and as someone else said if someone is of the mindset of natural birth they will seek and find.

The info and experiences in here are invaluable. It took a long time for childbirth to become a "medical problem" and I think eventually the tide will turn again.

thank you to all of you

 

[NicolleM.T.B.]

Hello ladies,

I dont really post in here but i have said since i got pregnant that i wanted a waterbirth with no pain relief. I dont have a reason or preference for not posting here but i do know when i get to a later stage in my pregnancy that i'll be in here all the time reading other peoples birth stories ect. I'm trying to keep calm about the labour but i feel its a bit early to be thinking properly about yet, just because i dont want to jinx my pregnancy. But i do think having a seperate forum for natural/home births is a good thing, for the ladies that are interested can come here and get/give information but other ladies dont have to have it 'forced' on them. I suppose its personal preference but i'm sure you ladies will be my lifesavers in a few weeks

 

[Jenniflower]

Hello ladies,

I dont really post in here but i have said since i got pregnant that i wanted a waterbirth with no pain relief. I dont have a reason or preference for not posting here but i do know when i get to a later stage in my pregnancy that i'll be in here all the time reading other peoples birth stories ect. I'm trying to keep calm about the labour but i feel its a bit early to be thinking properly about yet, just because i dont want to jinx my pregnancy. But i do think having a seperate forum for natural/home births is a good thing, for the ladies that are interested can come here and get/give information but other ladies dont have to have it 'forced' on them. I suppose its personal preference but i'm sure you ladies will be my lifesavers in a few weeks

Here's a great thread with loads of water birth stories if you want to read any. They're from all over the board. https://www.babyandbump.com/home-natural-birthing/496228-positive-natural-birthing-stories.html

 

[faun]

I tend to lurk in here but feel like a fraud as even though i had 2 pain relief free natural births with no assistance i did have them in hospital as my land lord refused permission to let me have a homebirth. So even though i was left to my own devices while in labour i feel like i can't post about my experiences or how i coped in labour with massage oil, music, walking etc. I am very proud i managed to have my babies with no pain relief at all especially as my youngest was 10lb8oz and i'm pleased i managed to keep the midwife away from me as much as possible until the final 20 minutes. With my daughter the midwife wasn't even in the room when i delivered her onto the floor as i was squatting and managed to pick her up with hubbys help and was cradling her in my arms by the time the midwife reappeared. Anyway sorry for waffling but i feel like it would be nice if more people posted in here about natural birth in hospital and what to expect.

 

[Mervs Mum]

Faun!!! WE NEED YOU!!!!!! Natural is not always at home!!! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE post your experiences!!! You can start things off and others will follow! This board is more about the experience and your approach than the venue. We have hospital, birth centre AND home birthers.

I BEG YOU. Please start a thread of your experiences. We need it!! x

 

[faun]

Thanks Mervs Mum, i will dig out my pregnancy and labour diaries and have a good read to refresh my baby brain of all the details and will start a thread of my experiences later on when the kids are all tucked up in bed and i can get a bit of peace and quiet

 

[Jenniflower]

Faun!!! WE NEED YOU!!!!!! Natural is not always at home!!! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE post your experiences!!! You can start things off and others will follow! This board is more about the experience and your approach than the venue. We have hospital, birth centre AND home birthers.

I BEG YOU. Please start a thread of your experiences. We need it!! x

I can't help but mimic exactly what she's saying. I think people get held up on the idea that this is a home birthing forum, but it says in the title home birth AND natural!

 

[Mervs Mum]

We would really appreciate that and very warm welcome. I had a wonderful 'hands off' experience in my birth centre with my daughter so I know it's possible too. I'll be interested in how you found it protecting your space

 

[Bournefree]

I agree.. I think that because the title starts with HOME, then people are already switched off to the NATURAL bit.

Perhaps it should be Natural and Homebirth? We should have far greater numbers of women on here, than we do currently.

I so, so, so very pleased that this thread as bought out all the self-confessed lurkers! ;-)
Lurk no longer... claim your interest in natural birth - we NEED your stories, experiences, wobbles.. the whole shabang! Natural birth is normal birth.
Xxx

 

[Jenniflower]

I'm tempted to even think it should just be Natural birthing thread. I mean with in the term natural comes home birth for the obvious reason that you can't really have much. But I give women so much credit that do it in hospital with out even gas and air. People who are at home still have the option of Diamorphine and/or the g&a so that doesn't make them any better off tbh. Or at least in my point of view Diamorphine shouldn't even be allowed to be given at all considering how useless it is and how much it effects baby, but that's a whole different topic.

Wait, I got off track.

Yes that's it. I want to talk to the Admin about getting one of us who are constantly on this board into a the possibility of being a moderator so that we're able to tweak and fix things as needed. I was the Admin of a board for over 4 years so I completely appreciate what it's like trying to be in 5 places at once it's insane, especially in a place this massive. You need more hands on people to make the little forums feel more organized and at home. That way we could sticky topics we think are relevant, and help keep order. Yes yes, I'm going off track again. I'm off to speak to the man behind the curtain.

 

[Bournefree]

People who are at home still have the option of Diamorphine and/or the g&a so that doesn't make them any better off tbh.

Jen!! How can you say that>?! I know what you are getting at, but there are soooooo many reasons why a women chooses to Homebirth and reasons why they ARE better off! All backed up by stats that indicated women who birth at home, even compared to a birth centre; are less likely to tear, need to transfer, less incidence of shoulder Dyscocia, PPH, etc, etc.. Plus the domestic benefts of not having to make an uncomfortable journey in the car (both to and from a centre), using your own bath whenever you want to.. eating whenever you want to, getting in your own bed and generally being more relaxed.. which helps labour progress..

.. there are so many more - but I know you know all this too! I just couldn't let that part of your comment pass me by! ;-)

I would welcome a local Admin - Letus know how you get on behind the curtain.thumbup:
Xxx:

 

[Jenniflower]

I think the key factor to better labour at home is the concept of being more relaxed. I think what I was getting at but hadn't quite got there because apparently my brain was going in about 5 different directions is that to some women a birthing centre and/or hospital is actually more relaxing to them so they should feel like they're not good enough, or their birth wasn't natural enough to be warranted in this section because it wasn't a home birth.

In addition there are some women who actually do need to be in hospital. As much as I condemn the medical practice of birthing I also appreciate how much it works in favour for those who need it. There's a reason these practices came about, not for the everyday women like you or I but for the woman who before all this couldn't actually carry baby. I want THOSE women to know they can still benefit from not shooting their children up with God knows what just because they're in a hospital.

ALSO, there are loads of women in the US who simply CAN NOT have a home birth due to insurance reasons and/or the stupid laws over there. I want THOSE women to be able to come on here and still get the support that they need to deliver completely natural, completely at ease, and completely in control in a hospital. If we have more women like faun coming over to this forum I think it would make more and more women see that you CAN have a natural birth in hospital. You just have to be educated and stick up for your rights.

That said, I obviously think if you can, birth at home. Seriously the benefits are so far out weighed for both mother and baby. I merely want to create a place that doesn't push those away simply for doing it in hospital.

 

[Bournefree]

I entirely agree!!! Well said!
XxX

 

[PeanutBean]

Sorry only just popped along to this thread as I've been a bit out of it with bronchitis. I totally see wher you're coming from with your OP Bourne. I'm currently getting the "I knew and baby that died..." and "I'd never put my baby at risk" in a GBS thread in third tri because I suggested the OP could choose to not stay in for monitoring and do the monitoring herself if she wanted and added that I am choosing to not have antibiotics. It makes me mad that I who have spent hours and hours researching into this and reading medical literature and sharing and discussing over here and in real life get these thoughtless comments from people who base their opinions of hearsay and anecdotes. Being able to come here and be rational and both thought provoking as well as provoked by others' thoughts is a godsend. Those of you who are in here a lot will know I'm going through a personal journey this pregnancy that is of huge significance and importance to me and I don't think I could do it without this section.

Perhaps it should be re-titled "research and making your own birth choices" though I suppose that's not very catchy! Having had the full shebang (or very nearly) in my first pregnancy the last thing I want to do it judge other women for their choices. But I will judge when those choices are based on flippant notions with no backing and they rant and rave about them. In the One Born threads elsewhere there are armies of BnB women scoffing and showering scorn because ladies are sreaming or having a hard time. I cannot get my head round why any woman would feel another was 'putting it on for the cameras' when in the throes of labour. It couldn't be farther from a supportive environment. If we can't even be allowed ot moan or scream or struggle in labour then no wonder we're not allowed to make an educated choice about our birth plan.

Sorry if that's a bit all over, still a bit broken!

 

[aob1013]

Got to be quick as i'm feeding and typing

I think it's a great section, with my next baby i will be in here all the time!

 

[Adelicia]

Anyway sorry for waffling but i feel like it would be nice if more people posted in here about natural birth in hospital and what to expect.

Faun... you sound like you had an amazing birth experience. I'm hoping for a natural birth in a birthing centre (I'm not quite confident enough for a home birth) and it would be great to hear the experiences of people who have been gone down that route.

I hope you have time to share more