Early 30's TTC #1

[Crumbs]

Regalpeas, don't let them get to you! Let it all out, then be done with their gossip because it'll only add stress to an already stressful time. People are just so inconsiderate sometimes! My ILs stresses me out and after a way traumatic incident with them, I stayed away - it was when I got my BFP. I honestly think it helped.

Soleil Breeze, great news about your insurance!!! Fx for you!!!

 

[MrsPTTC]

Regal - yes I've been using softcups for about, hmm, must be 6 months now, I think they're great. But I just worry there's not enough spermy, CM or lube getting right up there as gravity does it's thing. It's definitely worth a punt and as I don't particularly enjoy BD then why not?! I think forcing yourself to BD when you're not in the mood or too tired doesn't help matters.

I'm so sorry your family are gossiping about you, but on the plus side at least they are not keep asking you if you are trying & putting you in an akward situation like mine used to. They've stopped now so I guess they think I've got a problem lol. I definitely think you should let it all out to your mum if she's a good listener. As long as she doesn't go telling the family, it's none of their business what is going on with you & DH.

Soleil - Funny you should say that about things "entering your vagina" as I have that problem, I don't use tampons, though had to force myself to when AF came early when I was in Turkey. I NEVER feel that they're in right and I always get leakage. I've felt like that since I was a teenager. I've even had problems with DH entering me, even now it still hurts until we get going. However the softcups are different as you don't need to push them up like you do a tampon. If you're lying down then you just slide it in & it hooks under your pubic bone. Sometimes I can feel it so I don't think I'm putting it in properly but most times I can't feel a thing & it keeps you so clean! I couldn't use them for AF though .

Crumbs - hello my friend! I can't believe how far along you are - did you post your 12 week scan pic? I can't remember whether I've seen it or not?

x

 

[MsJMouse]

Soliel - glad to hear that your insurance is covering your meds. Hoping this cycle goes well for you.

MrsPTTC - Good luck with the softcups. Hoping it works for you and you get that BFP soon.

Regalpeas - sorry to hear about the family gossip. I can't put it any better than the way Soliel (thanks Soliel).

Rosa - congrats on the great heartbeat and scan.

AFM. Yay for birthday bding when you are ovulating!!! It was my birthday yesterday and I have had such a great week so far (such a far cry from last year which was just so flat and horrible even though I knew I was pregnant). Really feeling like this year has great vibes.

Thinking of you all and hoping you are all doing well.

 

[Regalpeas]

Happy Belated Birthday MJMouse!!!! Woohooo. It seems you enjoyed yourself! lol Very good. Yes this year feels like it has star potential.https://www.freesmileys.org/smileys/smiley-excited001.gif Yay for O.


Thanks Ladies, you are all right. I can't let this stand in my way. We should have been prepared for this type of crap eventually lol smh. Par for the course.

Crumbs good to see you !!! You're coming along. Wonderful. Makes me smile.

MrsPTTC I totally agree with the idea that BDing when you're not up to it makes for a bad and maybe even useless situation. Once I was against it, but started because I thought, hey we need to try as much as possible. Then I stopped, but now I am back to it sometimes. Most often during OV our libidos are extremely how anyway. I'm glad you liked the soft cups. I hope they work for your BFP!!! It's about finding what works for you. I once said that in my journal long ago. A couple has to be true to themselves and their needs. TTC is not cookie cutter for everyone. Wishing you the best!

And you're right Soleil! Our Bodies Our decision! I have to stick to that motto. One day I was in the mall (early on in TTC) and I came across a book called Taking Charge of Your Fertility . There was some interesting stuff inthere. Didn't purchase but I've always remembered that title and I like the perspective. One thing I can control is being as healthy as possible and how I see this entire process. No way am I letting petty gossip or rude social gestures intimidate me.

Thanks again to you all for you support always.

 

[mrsmax]

Hello lovely ladies

Regal; You are right, this is the the place where we can be up or down, happy or sad and know we are understood and supported. I am loving the fact that we now have a good split with TTCers and BFP'ers. It feels lovely.

If it helps, you arent the only one feeling down. I have been fighting despair for a couple of weeks. I am doing all the things you are supposed to be doing and generally I am ok, but I definitely feel like something has changed and this not being able to conceive easily thing is now serious and not just me not being relaxed! It is crazy to think I have just one more month until IVF starts. How did I get here?????!!!

re the gossip thing - I am sure that my friends must be gossipying about my lack of BFP by now. I know they wont be being nasty and will be feeling bad for me, but I just cant face it at the moment - however well intentioned. I take it as given the inlaws are gossipying - but like you - just shutting that all out. This is our journey.

MsJ - HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!! I am sooooo happy for you that you had a good one. You seem to be in an awesome space right now.

Crumbs - hello. Good to see you.

Soleil - send some of your positve IVf vibes my way please Seriously, I cant wait to hera all about it. We are all here for you.

 

[MrsPTTC]

Happy Birthday MsJMouse!!

Thanks Regal, I'm really excited, I really think it'll help the swimmers with the pre-seed in the soft cup. I've been chatting to an old TTC buddy who is due her in a week and am now feeling very positive. I knew she used softcups & got her BFP, but what I didn't know is DH put his in the softcup - she did it exactly how I am doing!! They didn't have properly at all the cycle she got pg! I hope I'm not let down as I have a bit of hope for this cycle now.

Mrsmax - sorry you've been feeling down. I'm fine this month as I'm trying something different so I''m sure you'll feel much more positive and excited next month when you start your IVF!!

x

 

[arianne]

GIRLS!!!! Im alive!!

I abandoned this forum for sooo long and today I was wondering about all of you and I see Rosa is pregnant!!! OMG!!!! IM SO HAPPY FOR YOU!!! also crumbs and Hopefulmama I think? who else????

I stopped trying and that is why I left the forum completely... but always praying for all of you girls...

I hope you all get that miracle gift you all deserve

I love you all!!

 

[mrsmax]

Arianne - welcome back. How are you? Are you just popping in or are you trying again? Hope you are ok

 

[rosababy]

mrsmax, I'm sorry you're feeling down. I've been where you are, trust me. One more month until IVF?! Once you get past the "why the heck do I have to do this crap?!" feelings, you'll be excited. The cycle itself flies by. I'm excited for you to start!

Arianne!!!! We miss you!! I'm sorry to hear you've stopped trying. For good or just taking a break? Good to hear from you.

MsJ, Happy belated birthday!! Bday o'ing is the best. HOpefully you got some excellent in there!!


I also have issues with things going "in" other than my dh and even then it takes a while for things to actually feel good. I didn't used to be like that...only since I've gotten older, and of course when we wanted to have children. I've heard of soft cups, but I guess I didn't really understand what they do. Hold the sperm in? Worth trying!

Afm, doing fine, just tired. Although not as bad today. Anyone heard from hopeful? I hope she's doing okay. Last I heard, she was really struggling with morning sickness. I have another scan on Monday. I wish they were on Fridays, because I end up wishing my weekend away just to see that heart beat.

 

[MrsPTTC]

Arianne! Lovely to hear from you. Hope you're back to TTC again!

Rosa, my DH going in is also a problem for me!! . Funny isn't it when you think back to how you used to be when you were young, I was sex mad when we first got together! Softcups are a mentrual cup, like a diva cup or moon cup, but they're smaller so hold the sperm near the cervix. Also means less mess after DTD

x

 

[Crumbs]

MrsPTTC, I didn't post it because it wasn't very good. The ultrasound machines here are pretty old and my midwife isn't so great at taking pictures. But I have high hopes for the next one in 3 weeks! I'll post that no matter how blurry it is!

MsJMouse, Happy Happy Birthday!!

arianne, so glad you're back!

mrsmax, hang in there hun, a month will fly by and your spirits will be up again. I'm excited for you too!

It's lunar new year in just a few days ... lucky year of the dragon! Let the baby making begin!

 

[MrsPTTC]

Thanks Crumbs, make sure you do, lol. Love to see the scan pics x

 

[mrsmax]

MrsPTTC, I didn't post it because it wasn't very good. The ultrasound machines here are pretty old and my midwife isn't so great at taking pictures. But I have high hopes for the next one in 3 weeks! I'll post that no matter how blurry it is!

MsJMouse, Happy Happy Birthday!!

arianne, so glad you're back!

mrsmax, hang in there hun, a month will fly by and your spirits will be up again. I'm excited for you too!

It's lunar new year in just a few days ... lucky year of the dragon! Let the baby making begin!

Thanks hon - I was born in the year of the Dragon so that has too count for soemthing right...!!

ps AF arrived bang on time yesterday. Felt fine - but not in a good way - like I have given up hope. Must work on my PMA. Maybe Clomid will work its magic this month and we wont have to go through IVF. Least DH is fully on board and is happy for me to use OPKs this month - first time in a year. I sense a lot of bding in a couple of weekends

 

[Soleil Breeze]

so although MrsMax is looking for some positive IVF mental attitude from me, I can't give it. Not today anyway. Due to go in to the office early tomorrow AM for my b/w. After the result comes back, I should be able to begin lupron tomorrow night. I only O'ed two days ago, though, so I'm not sure if that's enough time for whatever it is to show up in my b/w. Anyhew.

Right now I feel like I am giving up my ovaries. They will no longer be mine. Nor will my pituitary gland. I will inject myself with meds to put my ovaries to sleep and then less than two weeks later I will begin pumping a crap load of stuff in them to make them go into over-drive. Sensational.

I have some reservations. Trepidation is a-knocking at my door.

God I hope everything goes smoothly over the next three to four weeks...

As for you girls, a Happy, Happy Belated B'day to MsJMouse! BDing and Oing around the B'day sounds like it should give your baby-making vibes a little extra "oomph!" Can't hurt, eh? :wink wink:

Crumbs, my friend, thanks for giving your continued support to us gals. I can’t believe how far along you are already, and I am still so, so happy for you!

RegalPeas, I have that Taking Charge of Your Fertility book. I read it when I was TTC au naturel. I remember there being some interesting things in there, but it's in storage along with my What To Expect When You're Expecting book. (I had to remove both of them from my presence after I miscarried, and we moved a few weeks after that. So into a box they went.)

MrsMax, this AF brings you that one step closer the baby. Embrace it. You are loved. Don't let this get to you too much. Baby is on her/his way!

Arianne, it so WONDERFUL to hear from you and thank you for your prayers…

Rosa, I cannot wait to hear the scan update, girl! Love every minute of this pregnancy, weekends included! Because, before you know it, your weekends won't just be you and DH anymore!

Right, that's it from me tonight. Going to have my blood sucked out of me tomorrow morning. And then, hopefully, have a needle inserted into my abdomen tomorrow night.

 

[MrsPTTC]

Sorry you are feeling to crap about it Soleil . I wouldn't feel comfortable with the process either, especially the drugs. The things you have to do to get your ! x

 

[rosababy]

Soleil, I'm sorry you're feeling like this. Believe me, I know how you feel. Just think about your future baby. Don't think about all the stuff you're pumping inside of you, and what your ovaries are doing, but think about your dream. This will all be worth it, I promise. Good luck with your 1st jab tonight. My suggestion is to do it off to the side of your belly button and slightly lower. If you're looking AT your belly in a mirror, it would be like 4:00 or 8:00. Does that make sense? I've found that it hurts the least at those points.

 

[MsJMouse]

As Crumbs said it is the year of the dragon this year which is supposed to be properous and lucky. It is suggested that you start the year with luck by wearing red and not doing any housework today (I am up for that ). So I will wear some red - any extra luck I can swing I am all for

Soleil - I can understand your trepidation - I am always hesitant to take medications. But it will be worth it. Good luck with the lupron.

MrsMax - Fingers crossed that clomid and OPKs work for you this month.

Arianne - Great to hear from you. Hope you are doing well.

Have a great day everyone (I had better get ready for work )

 

[Soleil Breeze]

Lupron on hold...went in for the b/w yesterday and the results came back that I haven't "quite ovulated" yet. Huh?! I am on CD 22 at the moment AND I had a temp. rise on CD 20 (meaning O on my regular CD 19). Maybe it was just too early to show up?

Anyway, going back in for b/w on TH. So my ovaries and pituitary gland are still mine for now!

Rosa, thanks for the pointer on where to inject. I will definitely try those spots out first.

 

[mrsmax]

Clinic called and my AMH is 5 (UK scale). This is low, but "not the worst the nurse had seen". They will be upping my drug dosage accordingly. There are lots of different categories, but ZIta West treats 5 and below as low. I know it could be worse, but I'm gutted. Left work early as I needed to come home to cry

I'm beginning to think I may never have my own biological children,

 

[MrsPTTC]

Sending you tons of mrsmax, I'm so sorry. I'm not sure what it all means though, how does it affect your eggs and are you still ok to start IVF? x