Early BF and visitors

[Kiree]

Hi ladies..

I was wondering. When you first came home and were getting breastfeeding established, how did you handle visitors?

More specifically in these scenarios...

Firstly, I can imagine that its not going to be all plain sailing at first and it'll take me a while with techniques and stuff. I dont want to feel under pressure to get it spot on first time, every time. But i know if Im sitting there trying to get baby latched on and not doing very well, i will stress right out if i feel I have an audience.

Secondly, if people just land and I'm in the middle of feeding, obviously baby comes first and i wont be interrupting the feed. If hubby is in then he can take visitors in the other room or whatever, but once he's back at work it may be tricky. Also, I know everyone's different, but there are some visitors I just wont want to BF infront of.

I want to feed on demand so I can't see a way to arrange visits around feeding either.

Do I ignore the door? I don't mind getting the visitors to go in the other room - hey they'll have to deal with it -but will all this disturb baby's feed cos I dont want that.

I was wondering if you girls can give any tips on what you did. And I hope it makes sense cos I feel I've just rambled a bit there..

 

[Serene123]

Maybe inform people that you're breastfeeding and whilst you're finding your feet you're not going to be comfortable. Oh and, whilst you're happy with visitors you'd rather they were in a different room whilst you feed as you don't want baby disturbed?

I find the best way around these things is honesty x

 

[ryder]

I had lots of visitors and it was a huge pain in the butt.... I never succesfully kept bfing, so I dont have much advice. I guess if you are worried, maybe tell people you dont want visitors...

Or if you do think you will be ok. Have them come... but maybe have a private room you can go into and relax while your getting used to it?

 

[thelilbump]

i fed on demand. as a larger chested woman aswell i didn't feel i could feed discretely so quite often i went (and still do actually) in to a different room. At first i thought why the hell should i go in a different room to feed in my own house but actually it's kind of better. I'll nip upstairs and get in my comfy feeding chair and we have a bit of quiet time. It kind of helps being away from others when feeding i find otherwise my baby was always coming off and lookin round at the other things going on. If someone came round unexpected i just don't answer the door.

 

[sjnams]

Good question and great advice
I had been wondering the same thing as well and was feeling particularly worried about it after seeing how well my lil sis (who had her 2nd LO on Sat) was able to establish BF quickly and discreetly in front of all sorts of visitors. Just made me all the more convinced I wont be able to do that quite as well and will want privacy and peace and quiet while I am doing it.

 

[thelilbump]

you know, breast feeding is hard enough for the first 6-8 weeks without the hassle of trying to be discreet in front of visitors and entertain them. Don't be worried about having to go into another room or asking them to go into a different room after all your baby has to eat and you need to do it in the best atmosphere possible. you probably won't be much company anyway whilst feeding because you'l be too busy making sure your baby has latched on properly and that she/he's taking it okay etc.

 

[Mervs Mum]

I told my friends and family it was viewing by appointment only!! I sais well in advance that people wouldnt be welcome until we decided. Not everyone feels able to but I did. I had visitors the day I got home but I'd decided who and when. Then I booked them in my diary and wouldnt have more than 2 at once and there was a morning visit and an afternoon one.

If anyone comes to my door while I'm feeding I leave them there....even now....even left my hubby there yesterday locked out!!!

I did move to my bedroom if she needed feeding when I had visitors to start with - I agree you dont need the added pressure of a panel of judges watching you!!

 

[caggimedicine]

I had lots of visitors, and was BFding Harry on demand too... although he generally fed every 1-2 hours in the very early days. I would arrange dates/times for people to visit and would not book too many people at any one time. I'd feed Harry just before visitors were due to arrive and that generally kept him happy until they left. Visitors didn't seem to stay that long in the early days either (I would usually invite them by saying "would you like to pop round for an hour....?" so they would get the hint to just stay an hour), but if Harry got hungry again when they were still there, I just excused myself and took Harry up to his nursery to feed him. The visitors were very understanding - afterall, there's not a lot you can do, and no one wants to see a baby go hungry. Some of them would take that as a cue to leave, or would just hang around - depends on what kind of relationship you have with whoever is visiting I suppose?

 

[Kunama]

I was very lucky with my LO's, when they were hungry, that was all they cared about, I could have BF in middle of a hurricain and I don't think they would have noticed.
I actually found BF a great excuse to be able to get away from all the visitors and sneak off upstairs for some peace leaving OH to deal with them. I think i'm quite lucky in respect that in the first few days of being home, if visitors arrived and bubs needed feeding, id just whip em out, youd be surpised how many people phoned ahead to arange a visit after that! But at the end of the day it's our home and LO's were hungry they got fed and home should be the one place you should be able to feel comfortable

 

[csmummu]

I was quite open about BF but not infront of my or oh's parents so i had a muslin cloth i used religiously. this time i want to get a baby sling to help with the cover up

 

[mari72]

I thought i'd be much more reluctant to bf infront of people but once i had my baby it was more important to get her fed than worry about what the visitors thought. If there was too many people or i wanted some quiet time i just excused myself and went into another room, nobody minds and to be honest i think these days the visitors are more uncomfortable when you bring out a boob than you will be!! Just remember its all about you and the baby and to hell with everyone else and what they think! And make sure the visitors make the tea xx

 

[sam#3]

I really suffered with bfeding for the first 3 weeks as harry was born with tongue tie and he tore my nipples, i couldnt wear any sort of top when i was in the house because they were so raw so i had to tell people to ring in advance and then i would put a blanket over myself on the sofa and they never stayed long.
When he was 3 weeks old he had his tongue cut and was better and i could feed in front of people and be dressed!! Still sometimes i dont know that me or my dad are comfortable with me feeding in front of him!!!

 

[emma_27]

First time i breastfeed i used to move to another room if it was visitors i didnt want feed infront of but tbh like mervs mum said i didnt let anyone in and had strict visting hours lol. There was noway i was pleasing my OHs mates with giving them a peek lol. I also now do leave ppl at the door if im feeding lol.

 

[Chel]

I've answered the front door with baby latched onto the boobie!

I really coulnd't have cared less. If someone was in my home, to see me and and my new born baby and was offended I was BFing in front of them I'd have kicked them out in a heart beat!

My OH didn't like it much, he tried to usher me into our bedroom on more than one occasion, but seriously, its MY home, I'll breastfeed whenever I want no matter who is around!

If I'm at someone elses house I'll ask if its okay if I breast feed - and more often than not people are supprised I even asked.

Do what you feel comfortable with, but honestly, BFing is the most natural thing in the world, its nothing to be ashamed of or private about. If your shy about it, do what makes you feel comfortable, but dont let others opinions stop you from giving your baby whatever they need.