Family freaking out...baby shower topic

[AnakeRose]

Hi guys,
Ok I'm seriously confused here. My sister in law is insisting we hold a baby shower after birth (about a month later). My family and friends are giving me such a hard time about buying stuff for the baby because I'm going to need it between birth and the shower. They don't think I should be buying ANYTHING and just wait for the shower. I think this is totally out of the question because what am I going to do for clothes, gear, diapers, etc if I'm not supposed to buy anything?

Am I seriously out to lunch buying stuff I'm going to need or should I not be worried aboout what they think?

 

[curly79]

I think they aren't being practical if they don't want you to buy anything until after the birth. I think they're mistaking a welcome party for baby and a shower. I think the only practical things they can buy that long after has arrived will be clothes, nappies, maybe towels and bedding for when baby is bigger. Maybe that's what they mean by not buying for baby until after "shower". If they are getting clothes for when baby is older then that seems okay, but you need to buy things for a newborn before in my opinion.

 

[salamander91]

I don't know how they can plan to throw you a shower a month after birth but not buy anything yourself

I say your baby comes first and you need to buy essentials. Tbh I'd be upset if I couldn't buy ANYTHING for my baby. It's really exciting picking out clothes and stuff I'd be so disappointed if I didn't get to pick anything out... although I've never been to a baby shower so maybe you pick the stuff? But still you are going to need to buy stuff for that first month and to expect you not to is crazy.

 

[AnakeRose]

they're also freaking out (mostly the older family) that I'm getting used stuff off of Facebook and our local internet classifieds. Apparently they don't think people should do that. OK well if you think he should have all new stuff, you buy it! A good majority of the clothes and gear I've bought is brand new or near new. Why not save a little money!

 

[SurpriseMom2B]

Could they just throw the shower before the baby arrives, or is that out of the question?

 

[AnakeRose]

Could they just throw the shower before the baby arrives, or is that out of the question?

That's what I thought, but she thinks it's taboo in case something happens.

 

[xxenigmaxx]

Buy the things you absolutely need, like a car seat, size newborn and size 1 diapers and wipes, some newborn clothing and some size 0-3 month clothing, a few burp cloths, a blanket or two, the bassinet, and so on. Leave the rest of the stuff to the shower like all the nice clothing (they outgrow clothing soooooo fast, so it would be nice to have bigger sizes on hand), the crib, the crib bedding, maybe even the stroller, more diapers and wipes, toys, blankets, nursery decorations, bath supplies, and so on. There is noooo way you can have a baby for a month and not buy anything, but there are for sure tons of things a baby doesn't need right away. As for a swing, or bouncy chair, that is hard. It is nice to have right away, but they are not necessary, but do you think people will be buying you all the big items you will be needing? If so, I would wait for the big items since they are expensive.

 

[AnakeRose]

Buy the things you absolutely need, like a car seat, size newborn and size 1 diapers and wipes, some newborn clothing and some size 0-3 month clothing, a few burp cloths, a blanket or two, the bassinet, and so on. Leave the rest of the stuff to the shower like all the nice clothing (they outgrow clothing soooooo fast, so it would be nice to have bigger sizes on hand), the crib, the crib bedding, maybe even the stroller, more diapers and wipes, toys, blankets, nursery decorations, bath supplies, and so on. There is noooo way you can have a baby for a month and not buy anything, but there are for sure tons of things a baby doesn't need right away. As for a swing, or bouncy chair, that is hard. It is nice to have right away, but they are not necessary, but do you think people will be buying you all the big items you will be needing? If so, I would wait for the big items since they are expensive.

No, but when I bought the crib I got flack for it and when we got the car seat my family got upset...No one stepped up to get it for us so I bought it. I just don't understand why they're giving me such a hard time for even getting some clothes and basic stuff...

 

[xxenigmaxx]

that is silly - how are you supposed to bring the baby home without a car seat? I don't understand their logic. Good luck! I hope things get figured out soon!

 

[SurpriseMom2B]

Could they just throw the shower before the baby arrives, or is that out of the question?

That's what I thought, but she thinks it's taboo in case something happens.

Is there any way you can change their minds? If they are set on having it after baby, I'd just go and buy what ever I felt like buying. Make it clear to them that you feel there are things you need to have ready before baby arrives, and your not going to skimp for the first month on the off chance someone might give you something as a shower gift.

 

[AnakeRose]

Could they just throw the shower before the baby arrives, or is that out of the question?

That's what I thought, but she thinks it's taboo in case something happens.

Is there any way you can change their minds? If they are set on having it after baby, I'd just go and buy what ever I felt like buying. Make it clear to them that you feel there are things you need to have ready before baby arrives, and your not going to skimp for the first month on the off chance someone might give you something as a shower gift.

No I've tried. But, I've come to the conclusion that I'm just going to finish getting what I need and I've put a few small things on a registry for them to get. If they have a problem with that, then that's on them.

 

[Xpecta]

That's really hard! I mean personally, I like having a baby shower after so everyone meet baby at once, but you need stuff! It seems like you're going to be an excellent mom by being prepared! You know what you're doing. Don't second guess it! If they can't understand that, don't let it bother you!

Also, I live in Kelowna too!!! I also have two kids and lots of baby stuff, so if you're still in need of anything, PM me! I'm willing to give stuff away for free to make room in my house. Also, I think we're having a yard sale soon.

Bless you!

 

[SurpriseMom2B]

Of you are looking for "bigger" things you can leave to register for, you don't need a high chair, or a bouncer, jolly jumper, bumbo chair, right away, you could always save those for registry items! They are all things baby won't fit into until they can hold their own head up. Even register for a second car seat if you have 2 cars, or register for the next size up of cars seat you plan on using!