Family won't stop talking about the baby?

[NatashaZ]

Hello all. My family will not stop talking about the baby. When I walk into a room, people clap and talk about my belly. When I call someone, they ask about the baby, and then spend the whole conversation talking about the baby. If I have a lousy day everyone panics that there is something wrong, and when I do have reason to visit the doctor, everyone insists I am worrying over nothing. It is really getting ridiculous and I need it to stop. I dislike the attention, I don't want this kind of spotlight on my daughter, it feels obsessive and very controlling. I have tried talking to everyone about it and asking that the subject please be changed after the initial "how have you been" chat, but everything remains the same.
Is anyone in this situation and also want it to stop? This isn't the normal "we're happy you're pregnant" attention, it's really starting to creep me out.

 

[Futuremommy1]

they clap? seriously? That is beyond weird.

I'm sorry I'm not having the same situation, in fact after being on this site and other sites for the last 19 weeks I'm positive I have an almost perfect family. I even have random friends preventing others from touching my belly without me having to say a word.

But honestly if I were in your situation I think I'd reduce contact with people and if they ask why you aren't talking to them keep mentioning that you think they talk about the baby too much. I'd stop answering their questions and keep bringing up other topics eventually someone will get the hint and hopefully they can help you along.

Sorry!

 

[erikab922]

OK, when you say that they clap, do you actually get applause when you walk into a room? Your whole situation gives me the heebie jeebies just thinking about it! I can usually find the silver lining in every situation but I don't know how to stop a whole group of people from changing their behaviour en masse. I am stumped and feel really bad for you 'cause that would drive me spare!

 

[Skadi]

Why does this make me think of Rosemary's baby? lol

Creepy.

 

[Kristin52]

Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
and I'm starting to get angry. I'm not just pregnant, I'm still a human that has other things going on and would like a conversation OTHER than me being pregnant. I mean, I enjoy the "awww what are you having" comments and such, but people that I talk to on a day to day basis (MIL, best friend, etc) are always talking about it.

I wanna change his name because that's all I hear them saying!!!!!

..I had a MW appointment this morning and the second I got out I was getting jumped on
"HOW DID IT GO!?" HOW MUCH DO YOU WEIGH?
how's the babyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?!


ugh, just stop.

 

[Cheshirista]

I totally feel your pain. My in-laws relate everything I say or do to the baby. It stops me from going round there because it's ridiculous not to be able to have a conversation about anything except the baby. I get that they're excited, but I've never been one for baby talk, even now I'm pregnant, and I'm still the same old me that likes to talk football or politics or fashion. It does my head in/

 

[Cheshirista]

Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I wanna change his name because that's all I hear them saying!!!!!

..I had a MW appointment this morning and the second I got out I was getting jumped on
"HOW DID IT GO!?" HOW MUCH DO YOU WEIGH?
how's the babyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?!


ugh, just stop.

This too. My MIL has hijacked mine and OH's nickname for the baby and says it in every sentence, pretty much.

And when I have an appointment they ask me to phone them afterwards to let them know how it goes. I'm like, no, I don't have to report back to you, this is my pregnancy. I try to avoid contact with them and let OH ring them, and it makes me NOT want to tell them stuff.

My mum is really self-centred, which, for once, I'm really grateful for because we chat about her life instead of "baby, baby, baby, baby".

I'm glad you posted this because i've been feeling this way and thought I was the only one and being mean.

 

[erikab922]

My mum is really self-centred, which, for once, I'm really grateful for because we chat about her life instead of "baby, baby, baby, baby".

TOTALLY, my sister always has 20 problems going on in her life and TBH it's good to be able to talk through things with her because out of anyone I'm the one focusing on baby stuff a lot and it's good to be able to focus on something else - and if I help her along the way, then great!

 

[missajones777]

I say enjoy it!!! With #4 on the way, people never talk about my pregnancy and I feel neglected.... they have even said they've forgot that I"m even pregnant!

 

[ellemonkey]

They clap? Um, this happened to a girl I used to work with but it turned out they did it on purpose to make her feel uncomfortable, A really slow sarcastic clap as she walked past.

She made a huge deal about coming out with her pregnancy that a few women made her a medal for getting laid.

Sad isn't it.

 

[RaspberryB]

That sounds really annoying but at the same time it is lovely that they are so excited, I'm sure they don't mean to be creepy! You could try just saying you are so pleased they are being so lovely and excited but it would be nice to talk about their lives too rather than the baby all the time.

My parents are great and mention the baby a normal amount but MIL hasn't even said congrats or mentioned the baby at all and when someone asked if she was excited to be a grandmother she went "oh, well... umm... not really... it'll be different I suppose..." . Still, hopefully that means she won't want to come round much when the baby is here .

 

[snowfia]

(sorry i'm not in 2nd tri)
but i get this and it's really starting to annoy me.
when my friends ask how the baby is i just say that i don't get a response from her when i ask :L
and when there's a swarm of hands heading for my tummy, omg, it's not necessary. especially one or 2 certain people who press really hard just in hope to feel her kick. but i'm secretly glad they haven't cos it's annoying :L

 

[mrsrof]

Agreed!! My sister is normally all about herself but now every conversation is about MY baby and HER experiences!!! I do love talking babies, but not all day every day! It's still like 5 and a half months till baby gets here, give it a rest!!

 

[kirbyland1986]

David's family seems to be non stop about the baby... they always fussing about me(well baby) and when i go shopping with his mum all she wants to do is shop for the baby and its making me crazy its like i lost my identity! at least my family not like that they ask how i am and want to spend time with me!

my work friends is asking hows both of us even though its just me and the baby inside!!!!

its making me go crazy! but at lease they don't clap - thats just weird!

 

[Mummy Bean]

and have you noticed how personal space apperently is no longer a concern ...people touching boobs and bump - err NO!

Also how it suddenly ok to mention weight or bodily functions things that before no one mention as it rude!

Hope ur family chill out a bit as it would totally get annoying pretty quick. attention good obsession not good.

 

[kirbyland1986]

and have you noticed how personal space apperently is no longer a concern ...people touching boobs and bump - err NO!

Also how it suddenly ok to mention weight or bodily functions things that before no one mention as it rude!

Hope ur family chill out a bit as it would totally get annoying pretty quick. attention good obsession not good.

im not good with attention/fussing etc and it gets annoying... i think snapped at them couple of times already...