February mummies 2011 <3

[rachael872211]

Heelllloooo,

20 weeks today and had scan! We are having a girl! It was my feeling but I was so nervous and excited before the scan that I was wrong because I had convinced Jay is was a girl and I was worried I had got it wrong. When Eve got home I had a treasure hunt type thing set up for her and the end "prize" was her old doll in the cot....which was the girl doll (I was going to put the boy doll if boy) I told her when she got home that be prepared it might be a boy (she really wanted a sister) and she said "oh its a boy then" and when she saw the doll she cried! It was lovely.

I did attempt lennie without a nappy for half an hour last night. We have a puppy now so I thought one more puddle of wee wont make a difference! I put him on the potty and he done a wee! It was probably a one off but I am going to try again once I have a few days off in a row. Probably next tuesday.

And.........................................he's WALKING!!!!! Started Monday night and I was determined to keep him going and carried on encouraging him yesterday and today and he is improving everyday! I am so amazed at how his balance has improved by just doing a few steps for two days. I am so very proud of him. It has been an amazing week so far :-D

Thank you for all your encouraging words re blaming myself. I was just trying to find a reason behind it all and blaming myself was the easiest thing to do. Its still been a horrible month or so. Lennie had an appointment with Rhumatologist who diagnosed acro-cyanosis. Basically not raynauds or anything related to it! It just means he gets blue extremeties. She said his blood vessels are normal. So we are happy. The weather is much warmer now so its not happening so much. Hopefully by the time the colder weather comes he will be much more mobile and im hoping won't be so evident. From this appointment the doctor wrote to Lennie's paedatrician and in the letter she put that Lennie didnt engage and was difficult to gain eye contact and he also had stereotypical movements. The not engaging etc didnt bother me. I just knew that Lennie was annoyed. Our appointment ran an hour late and by that time it was 5pm and lennie was hungry and bored. I have never thought that he didnt engage. Stereotypical movement thing did worry me and send me into google overdrive - to the point that I wanted to get rid of the internet just so I can stop self diagnosing Lennie with the worst things I can think of. Lennie's paedritcian called me today and reassured me. I can't keep worrying the way I am and just need to deal with things when they come.

Jem that must have been worrying. fingers crossed she has stopped. xx

 

[rachael872211]

Hi ya,

Joise that did make me laugh about Lily's little knickers! It always happens with me.

Scan went well! Now I know what nub theory is I was having a good look while she was doing the scan and I do think girl! I'm convinced. I do have moments of doubt when Jay gets excited because he wants a girl. So I would feel really bad if I was wrong! Scan put me a couple of days earlier so baby is now due 6th November. I'm feeling so much better now too. No nausea and enjoying food again.

I thought I would try potty training Lennie this week as I have 5 clear days to try. I actually now don't think he is ready. lol.

He sat on potty first thing for 5 minutes and got off. I assumed he really didnt want to go. A minute later he pee'd on the floor! Tried again 15 minutes later and nothing. Tried 15 minutes after that and just before I was going to put him on he pee'd on the floor. Agaist the sofa actually.
Then he asked for a drink and I left him to it and then he came back in living room bringing a trail of poo! Normally he can poo easily when I put him on potty and considering he was on the potty 10 minutes before he must have needed to go then but didnt? After that he didnt like to sit on it and would just winge. Was I too keen? I'm thinking it was too soon and I don't want to put him off and make him hate the potty :-S
I ask him what he has done in his nappy and he normally tells me poo poo when its always wee! But he did tell me yesterday he had done a wee wee when I asked him. Also last night he kept saying poo poo which I thought he was just saying because its a fairly new word with him and he had done a poo a couple of hours earlier (he is normally once a day) so didnt think anything into it. Then he went to bed and when I checked him later he had done a poo in his nappy so I am not sure if he was telling me thats whats he needed? I'm so confused. After this morning I didnt think he was ready....but it's not going to be easy is it? I don't know if I am giving up because of him or me? I was thinking of trying again in a month. Sorry I have gone on so much about it!

Anyway I have my VBAC appointment this week and I am now in two minds whether to have a section. Basically I am worried I have somehow caused Lennie's development delays because I gave birth to him naturally. I know I was pushing a couple of hours and I worry thats why. I want to ask Lennie's paedatrician if that could be a reason for his delays but the appointment isnt until July so I am going to go to the appointment not knowing what I am doing.
I don't want a repeat section because its going to be so hard with a newborn and Lennie following that! But I really am struggling with the guilt that its my fault.

Lennie had a development assessment again from the health visitor a couple of weeks ago and he basically scored 0 in more things 0-5 meant delays 5-10 was need work and 10-15 was ok I think. He scored 3 in social communication but still delayed. I think it means he has global development delay now
Anyway she is now going to refer him to a specialist Health Visitor who is experienced in Development delays. She said they will do more detailed tests and possibly blood tests. She said there may still be no reason for any of it but the extra tests will rule things out.

Hey hun, how is Lennie doing with his development now? What sort of things is he delayed with? Can he walk? Respond to you? Point? Say single words?

As for your last birth, was there anything in particular about the birth you feel may have contributed? Usually things like hypoxia at birth can cause developmental issues... so things like if his heartrate was really low for an extended period - which you'd know about as they'd be rushing for an instrumental or emergency ceserean if that was the case. Maybe get a copy of your notes to have a look through with a HCP they might be able to pinpoint any reasons surrounding the birth that contributed.

Having said that, I was with a lady the other day who was pushing for eight (yes, 8!) hours. Hospital record. 2 hours is average for a first time birth, might be a bit longer than expected for a subsequent birth - but did you have your first by section without getting to 2nd stage? Because if so then it's the same as a first time birth in terms of pushing length. After a woman is fully dilated we usually leave 1 hour for baby to descend fully and be 'ready' then two hours active pushing if the heartrate is fine, before we start to worry.

Also don't forget each birth is different, just as each baby is different. I've met women with 8 children and each birth has been completely different.

BTW I'm not trying to suggest a VBAC is better than a c-section just giving some perspective. I take it you will go to a VBAC clinic or have an appointment with a consultant to discuss it anyway? Hopefully they will be able to help with your decisions!

Congrats the scan went well

I thought I should reply to this seperately so I didnt have to keep scrolling up and down. lol.

The rhumatologist put lennie at a year behind his age but this is her assessment on him sitting down and really not being interested. Lennie is going to be referred for a developement assessment by specialists in development delays and they will pin point exactly where he is in each area. Sometimes I go on development charts and try to do it myself but get so disheartened when I see what he should be doing I just shut the page.

Lennie is delayed in everything. But out of them all he is best at social interactions, but its still delayed.

He took first steps Monday and is continuing to get stronger and stronger. He responds to me fine I think. I call him and he comes to me saying yeah or what! lol. Pointing not too great. He points with his thumb and will do some body parts. Sometimes it can be annoying because I ask him where something is and he moves his eyes to look but doesnt point. He will point in a book. When I read to him I focus on one thing throughout the book. For example cat in the hat. I will show him who cat in the hat is on the first page and point using his hand and then ask him on every page after, and he usually does that ok but gets a bit bored at the end of the book and just wants to listen.

He says single words........he will attempt to copy. It sometimes would make no sense to someone else but he copies the sylabells (sorry bad spelling) and the pitch. He answers questions. Like where is daddy - work, but daddy will always be at work even when we are in the car together! or what do you want - bot bot. I ask him that every morning. I asked him his name today and there was an attempt at Lennie. Sounded nothing like Lennie but had same pitch and everytime I asked him it was exactly the same. His brain must be filling up with so many words which I am making him repeat. He can name all of us. He calls out for us every morning! and he can name our dogs. Yesterday I told him to walk to Evie and he said "to duke" and walked to the puppy! He does some two word sentences - but very little. He says "I did it" when I keep making him do/say something. And he starts some things off with A, like A ball.

He won't feed him self. Finger foods no problem. He won't load a spoon up. If its in the food and just lying there he will pick it up and feed himself, but thats it. I can't get him to scoop! He tries but he just repeatedly stabs at the plate and doesnt look! Even when he gets food on it but doing that method it falls off because he isnt looking. I don't know what to do about it. We have showed him so many times what to do but its not sinking in. But he drinks out of a beaker now and does it really carefully and manages that fine :-S

I didnt have a clue about my last birth, because i was so tired and it all a blur. But I was blaming myself on not pushing him out quick enough because i felt I could blame me the easiest. As it turns out at my VBAC appointment my consultant went through Lennie's birth notes and said his apgar score was 9. So there was no concern through lack of oxygen. It has reassured me and I feel more confident in my abilities to give birth! I just hope this one falls out to be honest. lol. Normally you have the next VBAC appointment at 38 weeks but as I was the way I was at my first appointment she wants me to come back at 28 weeks to discuss it again. She also wrote to Lennie's paed who said that its her knowledge that Lennie's problems arent due to the birth. Which has reassured me again. The weight of this baby is going to be kept an eye on due to the big weights of Eve and Lennie but I am hoping as this is a girl it might be smaller than Lennie! I just didnt want bigger. lol.

Sorry for the essay! xx

 

[rachael872211]

Oh and how do you subscribe to a thread cause I also love it when there are replies on here. lol. xx

 

[winegums]

At the top of this page, below the page numbers it says 'page tools' and if you go on that it says 'subscribe to thread'

I'm glad you're feeling reasurred about the birth, and that it wasn't the cause. 9 at APGAR is fab, I think I've only ever given a 10 straight away once... usually 8 or 9.

Hopefully the developmental specialist will be able to help... Joshua is still a bit slow on a couple of aspects - he doesn't really use a spoon either, however if we put the food on he will attempt to aim for his mouth. He is much better at finger foods like chips, carrots, sausages! Haha. He's not great at holding pencils or anything either.

He also still only says certain words, and not many people other than us can understand him. Like you say, you can hear the syllables and tone of voice and work out what he's saying - but those who don't know him/us well have no idea.

Other than that he's great at walking, running and anything to do with moving around. He's definitely a lot 'slower' and I don't mean that in a bad way! than Jakob was at his age, and even younger.

Also congrats on finding out it's a girl Have you thought of any names yet? Are you going to be having growth scans in this pregnancy?

Oh and also meant to say - for the walking/movement thing have you tried swimming? My nephew was fine at everything but was a really late walker... they had to delay nursary as he still wasn't walking and nobody could find anything wrong... they started taking him swimming loads as their dr recommended it as a really gentle way to improve muscle tone when the are kicking their legs about under water etc and they found it really helped him xx

 

[rachael872211]

At the top of this page, below the page numbers it says 'page tools' and if you go on that it says 'subscribe to thread'

I'm glad you're feeling reasurred about the birth, and that it wasn't the cause. 9 at APGAR is fab, I think I've only ever given a 10 straight away once... usually 8 or 9.

Hopefully the developmental specialist will be able to help... Joshua is still a bit slow on a couple of aspects - he doesn't really use a spoon either, however if we put the food on he will attempt to aim for his mouth. He is much better at finger foods like chips, carrots, sausages! Haha. He's not great at holding pencils or anything either.

He also still only says certain words, and not many people other than us can understand him. Like you say, you can hear the syllables and tone of voice and work out what he's saying - but those who don't know him/us well have no idea.

Other than that he's great at walking, running and anything to do with moving around. He's definitely a lot 'slower' and I don't mean that in a bad way! than Jakob was at his age, and even younger.

Also congrats on finding out it's a girl Have you thought of any names yet? Are you going to be having growth scans in this pregnancy?

Oh and also meant to say - for the walking/movement thing have you tried swimming? My nephew was fine at everything but was a really late walker... they had to delay nursary as he still wasn't walking and nobody could find anything wrong... they started taking him swimming loads as their dr recommended it as a really gentle way to improve muscle tone when the are kicking their legs about under water etc and they found it really helped him xx

I subscribed! It is lovely to get an email to say there has been a reply to this thread. lol.

Lennie has been referred to Paedriatric Development team this morning. I went to doctors and asked if he could be referred as advised from the HV and he went through Lens history and said he would refer him as a matter of urgency this afternoon. That panicked me a bit but im not going to think about what that could mean and just anxiously wait knowing me!

Trying to train Lennie with the spoon is hard work! He will just sit and stare at me and aim for his bowl without looking! I keep telling him to look what hes doing and sometimes he does but the other day he just watched me the whole time. lol. I brought some mousses this week and i'm going to give him one for lunch and hope its got the right consistancy to work.

Does Jakob communicate for Joshua? I remember doing that a lot for my brother. He would show us what he wanted and we would be like "mum adam wants a drink" lol. He didnt need to talk so much.

We have thought of a couple of names! We like Poppy and Olivia so far. So pleased we have actually agreed on something we like, then probably make our minds up when we meet her.

We don't go swimming very often! But len does love it. Prompting myself from this I am going to take the kids tomorrow. We went to the beach yesterday and Lennie went for a paddle and he loved it! Eve was winging that she wanted to get out cause "the foam was freaking her out" and Lennie was winging that he was being pulled away from the sea. lol. He does love water. lol.

The consultant said she wants to keep an eye on the growth but wasnt really sure what that meant. I think I start getting measured at my next midwife appointment. I have measured myself but I'm no expert! lol. I am about 27cm I think............which is way off what I am! So I think i'll wait until the professional does it. lol. My uterus is a good couple of inches above my belly button. But am I right in thinking it doesnt mean anything being over its just if it when they start measuring and there is a big jump in cm at another measurement thats when they look into it more? xx

 

[Jembug]

Hello ladies, glad your ok.

I'm glad things are progressing with Lennie.
We also think Demis's development is slower in comparison is Isla but thankfully we have no concerns.
Demi is great at using her cutlery but can't draw at all. I've asked her to draw a face and its defo not happening yet. Which of course is fine.

I had a day at home on Monday got so fed up with hearing about everyone's 2year old already potty trained that I just thought I'd put Demi in knickers!

So she doing a little dribble, I quickly put her on the potty and she finished it off in there
And by the end of the day, she was happy to sit on the potty and did a big wee!!!
I've had a few busy days so I will do it properly at the weekend now I can she can do it?

Charlotte, how do you manage kiddiwinks and training to be a midwife/uni work?
How do you get it all done? What's your support network? Only it's something I've wanted to do for a long time and I'm tempted to just go and do it????

Rachel how are you finding work and being pregnant and running a house?
I did three nights a week-in a row (Shaun's mum had the girls two days and after the third night I'd just cope.... My shifts are 9.5 hours... I got to 32 weeks and had to use holiday to 35 weeks then mat leave. I found it very hard third time round.

I always measured bigger at the beginning but by 30 weeks I slowed down And got smaller, I wouldn't worry? Xx

 

[Jembug]

Oh and congrats on the girlie!!! I loved Poppy but "Poppy Parfitt" didn't work well? X

 

[rachael872211]

Well done demi on potty! That's brilliant.
I did like ruby too but jay didn't like it cause it reminded him of someone he knew. Lol.
It is hard work doing all of it. I find I can't tidy the house all in one go. I have to do room by room with lots of breaks..... I'm so glad lennie is walking cause it really helps not carrying him about. He's not great obviously at the moment but even holding his hand now whilst he walks he is so much stronger so it's a big help.
I done my first night shift in about 6 weeks last weekend because I'd taken a few off with leave and I found it really hard. I hardly slept the first day of my nights so I was done in by Saturday at 1am! And had 6 hours to go. Then I slept rubbish and the Saturday night was really hard. I do always find my weekend nights hard cause of all the noise in the house with family and pets. Weekday nights are better cause the house is empty when I need to sleep. I also cope when I come off my last night. How did you manage it jem? I. Really find it hard. I'm. So desperate to sleep but can't cause lennie doesn't nap till 11. I end up so ratty. I can come off nights and just do days but there are so much more advantages to nights like they're more relaxed and your allowed to read after midnight so they go a bit quicker sometimes. If I have a good sleep I'm usually ok. I also worked out that I have 9 more night shifts until I go on maternity, again with taking leave, so I am at the moment gonna see how I go. Xx

 

[winegums]

What do you work as Rach? Would love to be able to read on nights lol!! My nights are often much more hectic than days

 

[winegums]

how do you manage kiddiwinks and training to be a midwife/uni work?
How do you get it all done? What's your support network? Only it's something I've wanted to do for a long time and I'm tempted to just go and do it????

It's so flipping hard! At the beginning it was hard because I felt bad leaving them so young, now it's hard because they're older they show how much they miss me etc so I feel even guiltier!

As for the work aspect... well OH left his job to be a stay at home dad because our childcare costs would have cost more than he earnt in his job. He now does bits and bobs part time, and the bursary keeps us going. As he's at home my shifts don't matter too much as he just works around me.

For the actual assignments and essays etc i have to generally do it when they're in bed, or i ask OH to take them out to the park so i can do a couple of hours etc. Or sometimes when times have been desperate have asked him to sleep downstairs, locked the bedroom door... then when the boys try to open the door in the morning and it doesn't open they go straight down and he's there. Then i spend the morning doing my work and come down in the afternoon and we go out to the park or something to make up for it, then i do some more once they're in bed again! Feels so mean, but sometimes it's the only way!

It's a massive compromise too.. I know I could get excellent marks and prob get a 1st class degree if I spent enough time on all the work, but I'd rather just get a half decent 'pass' and still get to spend time with my family, at the end of the day a degree is a degree and the midwives have said they don't even ask for degree classification when hiring!

I tell you what though, right now the hardest part is the broodyness. I still have loads of TTC stuff that doesn't expire till 2014 like OPKs and HPTs, vitamins etc! I still track periods and know exactly when i ovulate which makes it even worse as every month i think 'i could be using this egg!!! ' haha.

We definitely want another baby but i guess it won't be for at least a couple of years once i'm working, so that i'm entitled to maternity pay. But the NHS bursary does continue to pay if you go on maternity leave whilst on the course, so I guess if something ever did happen it wouldn't be the worst thing in the world haha.

Anyways, sorry for the ramble, if you ever have any questions feel free to ask away! xxx

 

[rachael872211]

What do you work as Rach? Would love to be able to read on nights lol!! My nights are often much more hectic than days

I work in an ambulance control room dispatching the ambulances and managing the crews. Nights can be busy but I think its Just cause crews sign off and you have less resources to send but I think that rule was made about reading when the workload was less. I'm enjoying it while we still can. Haha.

I guess babies come whenever so you are busy at all times. Do you have less staff at night or do they keep it the same all day through?

I'd love to have this baby in the day so I can have a good night's sleep before. Lol. Eve started in the morning but cause she was failure to progress it went through the night, and len started in the evening and came at 5am. Felt absolutely knackered. Xx

 

[Chilly Willy]

Hmmm Rachael's baby Sophie has arrived! She looks full term and mammy and Daddy seem delighted so I am assuming the 24 weeks I thought she was at is not real! Am I getting preggie Mammys mixed up???

 

[Chilly Willy]

And congrats Lennie on being a big bro!!!

 

[rachael872211]

Nooo its not me. lol. My friend has had her baby last night and her fella has tagged in loads of people. So misleading! Other people have thought that I have had the baby too. xx

 

[Jembug]

I felt sick reading that!!!! I knew it was too early, so glad little lady is cooking a buy longer.

How is everyone? Xxx

 

[rachael872211]

God yeah!I think she's viable now but still want her in me for a long while yet!
We're good. Lennie has started saying a couple more two word sentences. Today he started a new one of "go car" he only says a handful but so proud of the progress he is making. He has started to eat with a spoon and a fork. Literally came on overnight with that. He has his reinforced boots which are helping loads with his walking. Initially they made him worse but now he is doing much better. He got up from sitting and started to walk and I will tell him to stand up and he will come towards me on his knees! I'm happy as long as it helps him get out of the habit of crawling and makes him aware of it really. He has his development delay assessment in September. I'm nervous about it and I don't think I'll get the answers or tests even on that day but just worry me what they might say :-\ feeling more positive. But saying that I do have my upsand downs days. Just have to keep telling myself that if there is something wrong I can't change that. What's has happened has happened and I just need to work on what I can. I still hope he will catch up eventually. I'm working so hard on him with no advice and he is making progress so hopefully if he does need additional help from occupational therapists who actually know what they are doing then it can only be better.

Anyway is everyone enjoying the weather? At first I was and now I'm boiling! I even had to check I hadn't turned the heating on accidently cause of the warm air blowing through the house. Xx

 

[wiiwidow]

Hi all, just wanted to check in and say hi! Been so manic with wedding planning, house buying, working and Oscar I don't really know my arse from my elbow at the moment! It's full on! Am planning on ttc next year, when hopefully all of this will be behind me!
I know some have concerns about their kids, but they all definitely do things differently. Oscar is really physical but is so behind in comparison to others with drawing. Can barely be bothered with a potty most of the time! Anyway Rachael congrats on the little girl! How xciting xx

 

[Jembug]

Hi Wi, ooo when are you getting married? How exciting, it was my two year anniversary on Tuesday just gone. Time flys when your having fun!

Demi can hardly draw either and is totally not fussed if she has soiled her nappy. I've given up now as she starts preschool next month and I don't want to introduce too much change.
Goodluck on ttc, I hope it happens soon.

Rach any more news on Lennie?
And any girls names decided?

Hope everyone else is doing ok xxx

 

[wiiwidow]

As Jem your 3 are so adorable! Can't believe you managed to get married with a 6 month old! My wedding date is the 28th sept so not long now! Oscar has a cute little blue linen suit to wear my dress is all sorted but a few other things to sort out - its been full on. Do you know literally the last 2 days Oscar has suddenly become bothered by a poo in his nappy, finally we might be starting something lol. So I'll just add potty training to the mix! I"ll be starting a new job in October too! Can't wait to just settle down a bit lol

 

[rachael872211]

Morning ladies!
Wow, congratulations on the wedding bex! Does sound like you have a lot on at the moment.
Jem I remember when you got married! I can't believe it has been two years.
Names are driving us crazy! We agree on something then change our minds. At least we have loads for when she is born so we can see what will suit her best. The last agreed name was lola, even taught lennie how to say it and then jay changed his mind. Lol.
Len has his development assessment next month. In the beginning I wanted a reason but now I want everything to come back fine so he is just development delay cause then I will feel he just needs longer to catch up. He is definitely getting there. I do feel like it's all in his head but just can't say or show it so much.
Someone has also mentioned to me lennie has tongue tie! I feel pretty useless . I can see it. I just thought it was normal. So that might explain why his words don't make sense sometimes.
Len is showing an interest in his nappy but I do think it's me being lazy that isn't doing anything. He pulled at his nappy the other day and I put him on potty. Didn't do anything. Put nappy. On and he done a poo straight away :-\ got him a toilet seat which he loves but cause it's upstairs I'm not keeping on top of it. Just walking up the stairs for me is a struggle. I'm now getting to the breathless stage. We do have a downstairs toilet but it's full of jays fishing stuff so might have to get him to put it back in shed. He would do it for lennie. Lol. Xx