Feel like i'm going to break

[sweetbuthyper]

Its been over a month since I lost Nathaniel, and although I have days where its not so hard I feel like I'm currently going backwards and not forwards, I'm finding it so hard the last 2 weeks, I have uni exams and they decide if I pass my degree or not and the stress + grief are seriously making me feel like i'm going to break I've had 2 out of four exams so far but have the hardest ones still to go at the end of the week and then have my results from the hospital on the 25th of august.I just feel like i'm going to break, I'm not coping at all I spend most of the day crying whilst trying to motivate my self to do work, I'm crying my self to sleep and I just needed to get it out. thanks for reading.

very sad sweetbuthyper x

 

[mhazzab]

I'm sorry you are finding it difficult right now. I think going backwards and forwards is normal unfortunately. It's been 8 weeks now for me, some days I feel fine and others I break down in tears. Some days I am looking to the future and thinking about trying again, other days all I want is to hold my girls. We've been through something that nobody should ever have to go through. It must be hard for you to be under so much stress from Uni at a time like this. You should be proud of yourself for making it this far and still managing to do your exams. it will get better, we have to believe that. big hugs, we are all here for you xx

 

[Andypanda6570]

what you are experiencing is totally normal. It's been 5 months since I lost Ava and I can tell you I was the same way, I still cry every single night, it has gotten a bit easier but my heart is and always will be forever broken and I am definitely not the same person i was, I feel like I am a little more aggressive. Which I guess isn't bad. Believe me what you are going through is normal and the next coming months will be a lot of ups and downs also, it's just going through this grieving process, it's terrible
Trust me when I tell you it will get manageable the pain and the sadness over time, but it will never leave you. All I can hope is that one day when I think of Ava it will be with a smile instead of a tear , I haven't got to that point yet , but I will one day as you will also.
XOXOXOXOXOXOXO

 

[collie_crazy]

I'm sorry your feeling like this hun

Trust me its normal to go backwards and forwards through the stages of grief - there will be times when its feels just as raw as it was that very first day but the good days will start to take over from the bad in time. I dont think we ever really get over something like this, we just learn to 'cope' with it more Its been three weeks today since we lost Emily - I think I cried harder today than I ever have, I just lost it. I keep thinking 'I should be' and I need to stop it i.e. today I should be 20 weeks... I should be looking forward to our scan in a few days time... I should be decorating our nursery. Instead I was sat at a graveside in tears. Its just not fair!

Cant you get a pass on your exams and sit them at the next diet? I had to sit my final uni exams in the winter diet because my mum was gravely ill in hospital during the summer diet. In the circumstances I'm sure your uni would be more than willing to delay... It might give you a bit of breathing space - its so soon after your little ones passing to have all this extra stress on top of you too

Good luck!!