feeling totally overwhelmed

[ttc126]

Hi everyone... I had my baby boy Wednesday after an emergency induction for pre eclampsia that developed seemingly out of nowhere.

He was born after a surprisingly ok birth at 36+3. I was surprised and upset he needed to be in NICU as I had developed an infection and he was having trouble breathing. Its been a horribly long week.

He is finally doing ok off of oxygen and is trying to eat rather than have tube feedings. He is so perfect in every way.

I know some of you ladies can relate to this and I just need to get it out. I am already struggling with feelings of depression. I didn't get to see him at all until I was stable and out of intensive care after delivery. I feel like I missed a LOT as I'm barely able to go visit now. When I'm there my hubby (wonderful man) knows all of this stuff to do and I don't. I don't know how he likes to be held or what he doesn't like wrapped up in his blanket...etc. I've been trying so hard to pump but so far all I've managed to get is blood. Its so awful.

I feel like my body failed him and he's here too soon. I feel like I'm failing again because I've gotten no breastmilk whatsoever.

I'm kind of at a loss. Before today, I slept maybe 6 hours total since I was induced. Its just such a discouraging time...

 

[Foxybabyhg3]

It does get better. I felt like she wouldn't know me but honestly they do, I think it's an instinct they have. You will pick up on his needs & wants pretty quickly once you're able to visit and have more cuddles. Stay strong Mamma

 

[fluffyblue]

My son was born full term but spent a week in nicu due to feeding issues. I like you felt like he was "taken" from me I know that it was for the best as he was poorly but I felt like I missed so much.

I wanted to feed but ended up having to express then when I was able to he just wouldn't latch on.i hated the first week.....but by the Friday I had him back on the ward with me he was my newborn again. The bond was instant. Its very hard as a mum to not have that immediate bond at birth when they are poorly and taken away. My first two were with me immediately but ollie was whisked off.

It will happen and you won't feel this way for long baby will know who mum is I guarantee it. Hope you feel better soon xx