First Time Mom's - Due March/April 2013

[MrsHippo]

Another post from me, sorry. But was wondering if any of you (UK) have applied for child credits ect yet? I didn't even think about it until my mum asked me today whether I had applied for it yet. To be honest it didn't even cross my mind. But after three months they won't backdate it....so I am going to fill out the form and get it sent off today - after I have been out and brought a printer because I don't have one. But by the looks of it, we get 20.30 a week. Not bad ay. Then I also need to look at working tax credit but I don't think we are eligible for that, no harm in looking though.

 

[LiverpoolLass]

Just a quick reply coz I'm on my phone - Lauren the £20 a week is child benefit which almost everybody gets and it's paid monthly.
Child tax credits is separate and runs similar to working tax credits - we get £62 a week child tax credits. I'm not exactly sure what the criteria is, I just applied and was told we could have it! For working tax credits though I believe you have to be working less than 24 hours a week between you.

But yes, def worth looking into child tax credits and def worth applying for your child benefit as they don't backdate it past 3 months anymore....I only remembered to do it coz the forms were in my bounty pack from the hospital!!

 

[MrsHippo]

I thought working tax went purely on your income and not hours? If it is hours then we definitely wouldn't be able to claim as Adam can work 12 hours in one day!

Ill look later. Not managed to get a printer so will borrow my mums tomorrow!

Just at the doctors with Beau. I think she may have conjunctivitis... Again... So will have to get drops for it. Feel really sorry for her, it's obviously irritating her as she keeps rubbing it.

 

[LiverpoolLass]

I thought working tax went purely on your income and not hours? If it is hours then we definitely wouldn't be able to claim as Adam can work 12 hours in one day!

Ill look later. Not managed to get a printer so will borrow my mums tomorrow!

Just at the doctors with Beau. I think she may have conjunctivitis... Again... So will have to get drops for it. Feel really sorry for her, it's obviously irritating her as she keeps rubbing it.

Nope they told us that you have to , as a couple , work less than 24 hours between you. They take income into account in addition to that.
My cousin wasn't eligible because she works 25 hours a week!!! (In a shop, on minimum wage, as a single parent).

You can just apply over the phone you know, that's what I did. You prob won't be entitled to working tax by the sounds of it but neither were we and we still got child tax credit so it's worth a call. I think £62 a week is a massive help!!

Aww hope Beau is ok

 

[LiverpoolLass]

Sarah - oh wow, Isabelle ate for an hour!! Yeah I guess growth spurts can make them grouchy and super hungry!!!
Tyne seems fine today, I think maybe the hot weather is throwing him off a bit though - I hate the hot weather myself so maybe he just takes after me and isn't a fan of it!!

I did buy a Snuza and like you - never used it! Its still in its box in the wardrobe.
I'm thinking I might use it when Tyne goes into his own room at 6 months, but if not I'll just sell it on!

The thought of false alarms and the thing scaring the life out of him, and me having to go through his grobag, his sleepsuit and his vest to get to it and switch it off puts me off - plus while he's next to me I can hear him breathing and snoring all night anyway!

How did your packing go? How long are you going for?

Lauren - Such cute photos!! I love Beau's sun hat. And how cute is Freya?! Aww! How many brothers & sisters do you have?
We have floor to ceiling mirrors next to our bed too and Tyne is the same, he'd look at it himself all day long if I let him! lol.

I know what you mean about Asda - they do have such cute things but the quality isnt great. They are usually quite cheap though at least!!!
I bought some new vests in there last night (although he doesnt need any!) as they were really cute!

 

[doggylover]

Lauren I love those pics of Beau!! She is so adorable, and her little sun hat is the cutest. Freya is gorgeous as well, and I'm sure she just adores Beau! How is Beau's eye?

I got a child credits form in my bounty pack so sent it off at the end of April and it just goes straight into Isabelle's bank account. We aren't eligible for any other type of benefits. Even when my contract ends and my maternity pay ends in December (so I am unemployed) we are only entitled to the bare minimum in job seekers and nothing else. It pisses me off because we have been working and paying tax for years, and now that I have lost my job through no fault of my own, we get zero help. While some people who have never worked a day get thousands. How is that fair??!

So I managed to pack all we needed into the space that Simon and I usually take up. No idea what the heck we've been packing in the past, but I packed all Isabelle's cloth nappies, her monitor etc, and we packed our stuff and we still had space left over!!!

We tried to trick izzy into thinking it was bedtime before we left for the airport by doing her bed routine, then putting her in the car and leaving straight away in the hope she'd go to sleep. She was obviously far too excited about her big trip, and between 7pm and us landing at 10.30 she only slept for around 50mins.
Whilst queuing at the gate and everyone was gathered together, she decided it was a super time to give them a taster of her vocal abilities. She screamed and screamed for about 10 mins, and you could see everyone thinking "this baby is going to scream the whole way and be a nightmare..."
Well, she was perfecting! She ate/sucked for the first 30 mins, was smiling for the next 15 and sucked/ate on the landing for the last 15mins. The number of compliments we got as we got off the plane was hilarious as it was obvious everyone was then thinking they had dodged a bullet!

She also slept great in the cot at my inlaws last night. We didnt get in and get her into bed until 1.15 and she slept 4hrs which I was impressed with.

Thus far, my fears about this trip have been for nothing!

 

[MrsHippo]

Freya is lovely bless her, that photo isn't the best of her...she seems to be pulling an odd face lol and Beau is all squashed up..but I still like it

Beau's eye is a little better today. She was given antibiotic eye drops so that should clear it up within a day or two.

Sarah, so glad to hear that your trip over was much better than you thought and that she has been sleepin ok. So what plans do you have while your there?

Hayley, I have 8 siblings!! All but one are half though. Charlotte is 19 and we have the same dad. The rest on mums side is Jack, Ellie, Freya and Reuben. On dads side there is Jacob, Joshua and Finley. I don't have much to do with them three though.

Haha you are always buying clothes!! But then, so am I....I am terrible. I was thinking about it yesterday, yes we have lots of clothes for Beau BUT she wears them all reguarly so I don't think any of it has gone to waste. Apart from the 101 vests we have in small size!!

We are going to Alton towers on Saturday taking Beau too but we are going with mum, Rhys and the flock of kids haha...my mum doesn't go on any big rides so she will look after Beau while I do!! Soooo expensive though!! If you pay on the gate you are paying, I think 46 pounds pp, online its 36pp. How much of a rip off is that? THEN they charge 5 pounds parking :O But I am using my clubcard vouchers - 8.50 for one!!! How good is that!!

I really want to go shopping, clothes shopping... Adam was like 'you've got loads though' - yes loads of skin tight clothes that I look awful in!!! I think I will go meadow hall next week and buy some stuff.

Oh, I nearly forgot - I look awful!!!! I dyed my hair, I was hoping for a red tone within my dark hair....it came out red. It probably wouldn't look so bad if my hair was shorter...but with it being so long it just looks stupid. So I need to go out and buy a dark colour to cover it up!!

 

[doggylover]

Oh Lauren, I saw your fb status and wondered if it was a dye job that hasn't come out right! I am positive it doesn't look as bad as you think! But when it's such a change it always seems worse I think! Good god, I didn't realise Alton towers was so expensive! Your mum will be bankrupt after taking all the kids!

We have no real plans here other than hanging out with Simons family. It's his mums birthday tomorrow, and we have grandparents to visit, but that's about it!

 

[doggylover]

Arrrghhh.

I am desperately trying to remember that a)Simons parents don't see Isabelle much and b) a few nights out of routine won't kill us.

But I am not doing very well!
At 6.45pm Simon and his parents took Isabelle and their dog out for a walk. They should have been back at half 7 to allow her to wake up and start bedtime routine. They didnt get back until after 8 and she isn't waking up. It's almost 8.30pm and she should be feeding before bed now. She is still asleep so it's going to be at least 9.30pm before bed.

Now this is all dandy for the three of them. They aren't the ones who will have to be up all night feeding her if she doesn't sleep well because she's out of routine. Why couldn't Simon just stick to the routine???? I'm so cross. Like I said, if he could get up and sort her during the night it wouldn't be so bad but its only me. So I may have to suffer for his stupidity.

And I'm not waking her as she will only get cross and be even more difficult to settle.

 

[MrsHippo]

Sarah, how frustrating!! I'd be really angry too, like you said, it probably wouldn't be so bad if he was the one up with her but he isn't...

I hate how easily their routine can be messed up. I have just got back from my mums, I didn't realise what time it was (with it still being so light outside >.<) and they don't have clocks!! But normally she is in bed at 8. (Its 9pm). Now she is really unsettled I hope she still sleeps ok. This is what I worry about with someone else looking after her, I know they won't stick to our routine... As everyone else knows best ay!!

 

[doggylover]

Well she finally woke up at 9 and I tried to put her on her playmat, but because she hadn't eaten in so long, she cried, so I decided just to take her up to bed and feed her She had on boob and needed her nappy changed, and since her hunger was somewhat abated, she decides its now play time! So it's 9.40, and she's now playing.

And when I was feeding her I said to Simon he shouldn't have kept her out so long,mand he acts like I'm being really unreasonable and kept saying "well I didn't do it on purpose". Oh so that makes it ok?? I told him the fact that he doesn't respect THE ROUTINE is pretty obvious, and he clearly doesn't care about the consequences since its not him dealing with them at 3am. He, of course, takes a massive huff about this.

Now she's had two late nights in a row I'm worried it'll get her into a new routine.

I am probably fretting and worrying for nothing. But I can't help it. Why do people not respect THE ROUTINE???!

 

[I Love Lucy]

Sarah - So far cloth diapering has been okay when we travel though the last trip we used every diaper we packed before getting home. Haven't had to do any laundry yet while away since we haven't stayed gone long enough to need to. I've just used my prefolds, fitteds, or basically whatever diapers I dry in the dryer rather then line dry first. Then I make sure I have 3 or 4 diapers at home that are ready to use while I wash up all the dirty diapers from the trip. I think you will be fine with 21 diapers especially since you plan to wash each night.

I also completely understand packing for the baby. My list of stuff to bring for Aiden seems endless. I've basically told DH he has to pack his own stuff now too so it's one less thing for me to deal with.

Sorry your routine has gotten so messed up. Aiden's routine gets messed up when we're at my parents but we've always been able to get back into our normal routine once returning home without much difficulty. Though the first day back Aiden would sleep nonstop and only wake up to eat. I think he decided he needed to catch up on all the sleep he missed while we were gone. So hopefully you don't have much trouble with Isabelle when you get back home.

Lauren - I hope Beau feels better soon.

Love the pictures you posted too. So cute!! Aiden also enjoys looking at himself in the mirror.

Sorry the hair dye didn't turn out how you wanted it too. Hopefully you can get out to get a darker color soon so you can fix it.

AFM - My visit with MIL yesterday went ok. We went out for lunch which was nice since I don't get out of the house much during the day. She did literally grab Aiden out of my arms as soon as I came downstairs after I fed him though which pissed me off. Nothing infuriates me more then people acting like I need to let them hold my son whenever they want. She also seemed like she was getting annoyed with how much Aiden was looking/smiling at me while she was holding him. I don't know what she expects, I'm his mom, of course he's going to look/smile at me more. She also asked about coming out Friday when DH's godmother is in town. I told her maybe depending on the time but I have so much stuff to do Friday that I'm thinking it's going to be no regardless of the time. We're leaving early Saturday morning to head to Indiana so I need to get everything packed and ready to go on Friday.

 

[MrsHippo]

Sarah - You have every reason to worry about it though. I do. Last night, her routine was out and she was a little madam all night. Took ages to fall asleep, probably close on an hour. Woke at 1 so fed her, then she woke again at 2:30 but fell back to sleep, up at 4 for another feed then 7. I was really tired so I went back to bed after then and took her with me, we both slept until 10. But just shows how something really little can throw them off course.

Does anyone else not enjoy being at home all the time? I loved it at first but now I hate it. I think of excuses to get out all the time - normally resulting in me spending money though! I think it might be because the weather is so nice out and I am stuck indoors. I'd go on a walk or something but I get bored.... I don't mind being at home if I have stuff to do, but when I have bob all, tv is boring and housework is done, I hate it. I feel as though I need a hobby or something. But what? I certainly don't want to even think about being back at work though!! I just need something to occupy me. People said ''all your time will be taken up looking after a baby'', yes she does take up quite a bit of my time but I also have a lot of time where I am bored sh*tless

Think I will be able to keep myself occupied in the garden once I move...and duck hunting (pet hunting, not actual duck hunting lol). Then I can decortate Beau's room and stuff.

Ideally I'd like to be able to do something that could bring in some money. The comping is fine but it takes up quite a bit of my time and return isn't guaranteed. Although, I do enjoy doing it and when I win it pushes me to do more

I used to work at a solicitors and a woman there was made redundant while she was on maternity leave. Instead of looking for something else she started making dribble bibs and selling them on....then she gradually started making more things and now she has her own proper buisness going off. I wish I could do something like that. I have always wanted to do floristry (even though I'd be sneezing my head off all the time ), it can also be quite a high pressured job. Another thing I have always wanted to do is open my own cattery...that might happen one day in the future but not any time soon. Hmmmm

Brittany, we posted at similar times again!! I'm not surprised you got annoyed with your MIL, I would too. I don't know why family act as though they are entitled to do as they please with our children. My sister holds Beau a lot, sometimes when I don't always want her to. But she has always been like that with brothers and sisters ect so I kind of expected it.

We are going to Cornwall a week tomorrow. So late next week I will be getting ready to pack everything away. I need to somehow figure out how to use that sling as I still haven't!!! Cornwall is full of steep, none friendly pushchair routes.... so to get to the nicer beaches I am going to have to carry Beau around. I hope the weather is kind to us too!!

 

[I Love Lucy]

Lauren, I definitely don't enjoy being at home all the time. I find I get really bored even though I have Aiden and my animals. I usually have housework I could do if I wanted but I would just much rather get out of the house. I definitely think we go out more now then we ever did before we had Aiden. Though like you, it usually results in us spending money which sucks since I'm trying to build my savings back up since we started spending that with all our trips out.

 

[MrsHippo]

Me again.....what is everyone doing for fathers day?? I am getting Adam a personalised card, not bothering with a gift...and he won't be in the country anyway :/ but I brought this card https://www.notonthehighstreet.com/rubywren/product/personalised-days-you-ve-been-my-dad-card and I wrote a little poem inside, you can only fit a small message inside which is annoying so I had to shorten the poem I wanted to use.

You held my tiny hand when I first arrived.
You were there when I first opened my eyes.
You&#8217;ve calmed my fears,and kissed my ears.
I promise to always call you Daddy,
and always be your little Baby.

 

[I Love Lucy]

For Father's Day I made my DH I a personalized card with pictures of Aiden and then I put a little poem in it. I also made him a personalized coffee mug (I got a code for a free one for mother's day for myself so I have one and wanted DH to have one too), a personalized photo frame that says "First Father's Day" and will have the year and say "Daddy and Aiden", and I got Aiden a onesie that says "Boobie Monster" on it since that is what DH likes to call him. I think I went overboard with the gifts but I was excited.

 

[doggylover]

I haven't really thought about Father's Day yet :/ I love that card Lauren...I may steal that! I would get him a mug but he has millions of dad mugs people bought him when she was born, since he is a photographer and picture framer both those options are out no idea!

Staying at home: I find my days go so quickly I haven't really had the time to be bored. BUT any days I haven't been too busy, I have found myself thinking about work, and actually how much I enjoyed it even tough I moaned all the time!
Generally though, I don't have too much time home alone, usually just in the mornings and by the time Isabelle is down for her nap, and I'm dressed, have cleaned etc its time to go out to whatever we are doing that day.
And Simon and I are the opposite, we have more money now than ever somehow! Even though I'm getting paid less on maternity, I am still better off as I was spending so much money on petrol to get to work. Plus we rarely do anything that costs money (generally walks, visiting family or friends). We're very money conscious and are both big savers and hate spending!!

Brittany sorry to hear mil has been annoying you again. She just doesn't seem to realise the boundaries at all, and she isn't getting any better at all, is she?! I'm glad though that you are keeping your distance by not letting her dictate your schedule, as that would only make her a million times worse. I know you had been worried about that during pregnancy as you said you weren't good at telling people when to back off (basically, I may have paraphrased that!) but you seem to be doing a great job in holding your ground with her.
Another trip this weekend? Aiden is a well travelled boy!
So far the use of cloth has been fine, especially since the weather is good and its all drying well. Only problem with cloth is I am getting totally obsessed and just keep buying it!!! Every time I say "ok I don't need anymore".... And then buy something else!

Lauren I did do a double take when you said duck hunting I think it's a great idea to try and find something that you enjoy that could also bring in some extra money. You can always give something a go, and if it doesn't work you still have your "real" job to go back to. My BIL does photography on the side (he's a policeman) and has been earning well just through word of mouth, so something like floristry would be similar I imagine - word of mouth, you start of small and go from there.
Definitely try your sling out this week and get Beau used to being carried. Izzy sometimes fusses a bit in it as she likes to stretch and squirm, so if I know we are going to something when she'll be in it for hours, I wear her a little bit each day before we go.
Fingers crossed for nice weather - Cornwall is shit in the rain!!!

afm today was a better day, less stressful for me, and Izzy in bed at normal time she has been having some big wailing sessions recently though when nothing but boob will satisfy her. She really, really screams, and eventually runs out of breath so her scream tails off and then she starts to kind of choke. After trying to soothe her in other ways and failing, the boob goes in and she guzzles, but her whole body is still being shaken by pathetic little sobs (the kind you get when you've been crying heavily for ages) she does it at least once a day now, and its horrible. I'm hoping its part of the leap she is in, and not a new regular thing!

She went down perfectly tonight, no fuss at all, so fingers crossed for a good night.

Tomorrow is our last full day in Norfolk. Simons sister is meant to be coming down, but tbh I'm very pissed off with her since Isabelle's birth. You may remember the whole fiasco just before Izzy arrived when she wanted to stay with us the days I was being induced etc. well she ended up seeing Isabelle the day after she was born, and this is the first time since then, which is fair enough as flights are expensive.
But what pisses me off is that she NEVER (not even once) texts me to find out how Isabelle is. I asked Simon if she texts him, he said she did at the start but hasn't in ages to ask about Izzy. She just doesn't seem interested in finding out about her. I know she must hear through their parents, and everyone always makes the excuse that she's very busy at work (erm, I'm a teacher too I know exactly how busy it can be) but how long does it take to send a text once a week?
Also, she is super super crafty and as long as I've known her has always been making things for family and friends, from baby blankets to aprons to...well anything really! So we assumed she would make lots of cute bits for Izzy and love sending her stuff. If you remember we asked her to make the curtains and she didnt. Well she hasn't made a single thing for her, not during my pregnancy nor since she arrived.
Their mum makes excuses for her saying how busy she is, but I just can't believe how disinterested she is seeming. I know that she'd be upset if I said anything and probably doesn't even realise what she's (not) doing, but I am really not impressed with her at all. Simon has always been close to her, and even he is pissed off at how she's been acting. She only has one brother, and we only have one child...is it really that much to expect her to show some interest?

Rant over

 

[doggylover]

Good lord that was a mammoth post!!!

 

[MrsHippo]

Haha don't worry about your mammoth post! I have posted enough of them, mainly of me moaning!!

I'd be pretty p'd off too, I get annoyed when you think someone will make an effort but instead do the complete opposite. I have certain family members that have made no effort at all, no texts or phone calls... I'd have thought some may have wanted to visit, but haven't. I am sick of making the effort with these people, it's supposed to work both ways!! You'd think they would be the one to make the effort considering we are the ones with a baby!! I just don't get some people.

Brittany, you have gone all out haven't you I don't ever bother with things like mugs ect as i am one of those types who like matching ones and end up throwing out the odd ones

I don't know whether to bother getting my dad a card this year as it falls right in the middle of his holiday... Which he leaves for on Saturday and I reeeally don't want to go round tomorrow to drop one off for him to take away. Hmmm might get him a 'sorry it's late' Father's Day card for when he is back... If I remember lol

 

[LiverpoolLass]

Lauren - Wow 8 siblings! Christmas must get expensive for you! lol! I'd love to have a big family like that though.

I know...I am AWFUL with clothes. I bought more today....and yesterday... But like you said - he wears them all!!! So ... its fine!!!

Places like Alton Towers are SO overpriced, its crazy! My sister takes her kids all the time to Peppa Pig world and I can't BELIEVE how expensive it is! I'm dreading Tyne getting to the age where he's asking to go to these places all the time!! eeek!
Hope you have fun though! i've never been - I'm like your Mum, I do NOT do big rides! lol.

As for being home all the time - I kind of know what you mean. I do like being at home but it can get a bit boring sometimes - but then I do have a fair few hobbies so I am usually entertained most of the day!

You should definitely try to start up a hobby you enjoy that you can make a bit of money from. Thats exactly what I'm doing with the blogging - I absolutely love it!
Writing has always been my hobby ever since I was a child so blogging gives me the chance to write for an actual audience, and I get gazillions of freebies out of it - plus you get paid posts too, I've made £120 cash this week from blogging not including the free stuff I've had!
I'm really hoping to be able to make a part time wage from it so that I won't need to go back to work once my maternity allowance ends.

You could always give blogging a try if you like writing - I know you like a good freebie like I do! lol!

Otherwise I'm sure there are lots of other things you can do that you might be able to make a bit of money from on the side.
Jon does ebay selling - and a friend of mine paints and decorates wooden letters and sells them online, she basically makes kids names for their nurseries etc. She does pretty well out of that.

Fathers Day - Awww that poem is soooooo sweet!!! The card idea is lovely!

I've gone way overboard with Fathers Day but OMG I'm so excited, I can't wait to give Jon his goodies!!!

Admittedly most of them are free for me to review on the blog, but still - its the thought that counts, right?! lol.

He's got some socks, a braun wet & dry shaver, car cleaning stuff, some toiletries, a personalised mug with his favourite pictures of me & Tyne on, a keyring with his favourite picture of me & Tyne on, and the three things I'm including pics of which are my absolute favourites!!!!! SO cute!!!

Brittany - sounds like you're really spoiling OH for fathers day! Yay how exciting!!!

Sarah - How is Isabelle settling now?! I hope it hasnt been too bad with her routine being messed up.

Tyne has been doing the exact same thing with the mega crying session at least once a day - is Izzy's usually around the same time every day? Tyne's is!
Its so horrible as there's just nothing I can do to soothe him - I just have to keep cuddling him and playing him his favourite song (I downloaded the Bloom FM app and he ADORES their lullaby channel - its like actual magic!!! I play it and he shuts up instantly!!!!! I recommend the app highly lol) and eventually he calms down and drops off.
Its like he gets SO tired but really struggles to be able to drop off to sleep.

I would be SO annoyed about the sister in law too :/ It must be hard not to say anything to her. Maybe Simon should casually drop a sly comment in to conversation some time?! I always think these people need to realise that their apparent lack of caring can be pretty hurtful.
Does she have any children? I wonder if maybe its some kind of jealousy?!

I'm experiencing that a lot from one of my supposed closest friends but thats a story for another time!

AFM - My mother is CRACKING ME UP!!!! I swear she thinks shes in some sort of competition with me where Tyne is concerned - she is forever trying to second guess me everytime I do anything for him, he'll be crying and I'll give him his dummy and she'll insist that he's hungry or something.
She's always usually wrong but today she said he needed some water, so I gave him some and he took it - instead of just leaving it at that she had to say "See! I told you I was right. That poor baby must be so thirsty..." and then spent ten minutes telling Tyne what a poor little baby he was....AAAAAARGH!!!!

She has also been on my case all day, telling me that she thinks I have post natal depression!!! This is all because I didn't fancy going out for a walk with her this evening - she insists I "Never go anywhere". Errrm...NO! I go out with Jon & Tyne on every one of Jons days off, I just don't want to go anywhere with HER....

Its also because I didnt go out to the cinema as planned last night because Tyne was too unsettled - she cannot accept that I don't want to leave my extremely unsettled baby with her or anybody else. I know she has looked after plenty of babies and she'd know what to do, but its not the point - the point is I just didn't want to leave him upset, I wouldnt have enjoyed myself having walked out on a screaming banshee of a child - it does NOT mean I have post natal depression?!!!

I swear - we NEED to move NOW-ISH!!! My sister is viewing a property in Devon for us tomorrow morning which looks promising. PLEASE keep your fingers crossed for us!!! I need to be out of here and back to our own space again! Its been WAY too long

Anyway - I'm leaving the pics of my favourite Fathers Day gifts for Jon!