FOB is a pedophile. I feel so gross.

[Croc-O-Dile]

edited.

 

[andrea16]

Aaww im sry mamaz dats sad nd i would be pissed t0..add me t0 ur c0ntacts

 

[alysedelovely]

I'm so sorry my dear. I know you must feel so hurt and betrayed. try to stay calm for little olivia just know that at least you are having a beautiful daughter out of this horrible man.

people like him have serious issues and I really think you are doing the best thing for your daughter

 

[Croc-O-Dile]

Thanks. I always thought in the back of my mind that he was like this, but to actually have it proven and in my face is completely different.

He had the balls to text my mom earlier and tell us that his grandmother didn't want to be a part of my baby shower when I went out of my way for her to make sure she felt included. When my mom asked why she felt this way he said it was because she didn't see the need to socialize with me until after Olivia's born but she would send something for her. At which point I text him and told him that he and his family can keep their gifts because they're no longer welcome in my home.

 

[emilyjean]

At which point I text him and told him that he and his family can keep their gifts because they're no longer welcome in my home.

Ha! Good for you girlie! It must hurt a lot right now, but be thankful that you've realized it before your LO is born. Honestly I would definitely press statutory rape charges, because it would also solve his parental rights issue. Plus, it would prevent other girls from going through the same thing you are, you know?

Props to you for being so strong!

 

[futuremommy91]

You were being used hun- by a sick and disgusting man. I cannot tell you how sorry I am that this man ever entered your life. But do NOT blame yourself. This is what he is good at- manipulation.

When I was 14 I had a (brief, thank god) stint with a 23 year old man who CONSTANTLY tried to get me to have sex with him. I was lucky to have my mom make me see who he truly was before it escalated to that, but for a while after I felt so dumb for getting into the situation in the first place. You are not in any way weak, stupid or at fault- *******s like this are real pros at manipulation.

I definitely think it is a good idea that you are making him sign over rights- and I really can't imagine him getting them back, even if he decided he wanted them back later on. He committed stat rape and there is physical proof.

Do you think counseling could help? I have a friend who was used in a similar way and she found it helped LOADS to talk to a counselor about all this. In the meantime I'm glad your family is being so supportive.

I'm here for you if you need me- just PM me if you'd like to talk.

MAJOR hun.

 

[Pink_Tinks]

good on u for being so mature about the whole thing, id probably go beat him up and end up in prison lol.

seriously tho, forget him, concentrate on keeping yourself well and happy for your baby.
you'll be a great mum x

 

[sleepinbeauty]

i'm so glad you stood up to him!

Seriously though, I think you should press charges and have him put away. He's only going to continue doing this to other minor girls! (and let's face it, you have some pretty undeniable proof that he's slept with you.)

Of course it's your choice. Just remember that you don't owe him a damn thing and that this isn't your fault. *hugs*

 

[EternalRose]

I definately think your doing the right thing to stay away from him but I do have a few questions. You said you started seeing him when you were just 15 and he told you he was 21? We now know that he was lying, and he is 24 but did you not see anything wrong with going out with someone that is 21? You were still underage then, and he was too old for you. Did your mum not see anything wrong with that age? Did she know that you were sleeping with someone who claimed to be 21, when you were only 15? Im not blaming you hun at all, I am just curious as to why this has all flared up because you have found out he is 3 years older than what he originally said as whichever way you look at it, the whole thing has been illegal.

 

[Mummy2Asher]

i think your doing the right thing and getting all rights of your daughter, i would no way allow my child to be near a man like that! i hope he agrees and you never have to see him again. xx

 

[flutterbaby]

I definately think your doing the right thing to stay away from him but I do have a few questions. You said you started seeing him when you were just 15 and he told you he was 21? We now know that he was lying, and he is 24 but did you not see anything wrong with going out with someone that is 21? You were still underage then, and he was too old for you. Did your mum not see anything wrong with that age? Did she know that you were sleeping with someone who claimed to be 21, when you were only 15? Im not blaming you hun at all, I am just curious as to why this has all flared up because you have found out he is 3 years older than what he originally said as whichever way you look at it, the whole thing has been illegal.

i couldn't of put it better myself it was wrong to start off with never mind the added age my mom would of kicked my f**king arse if i'd of strolled in with a 21 year old and would of had him done for rape there and then its not your fault but your mother is a part to blame the adults around you are supposed to protect you i do think your doing right now but should your mother not of pointed these things out sooner like age 16 is the legal age for a reason and satutory rape has a age for a reason

 

[sleepinbeauty]

I definately think your doing the right thing to stay away from him but I do have a few questions. You said you started seeing him when you were just 15 and he told you he was 21? We now know that he was lying, and he is 24 but did you not see anything wrong with going out with someone that is 21? You were still underage then, and he was too old for you. Did your mum not see anything wrong with that age? Did she know that you were sleeping with someone who claimed to be 21, when you were only 15? Im not blaming you hun at all, I am just curious as to why this has all flared up because you have found out he is 3 years older than what he originally said as whichever way you look at it, the whole thing has been illegal.

i couldn't of put it better myself it was wrong to start off with never mind the added age my mom would of kicked my f**king arse if i'd of strolled in with a 21 year old and would of had him done for rape there and then its not your fault but your mother is a part to blame the adults around you are supposed to protect you i do think your doing right now but should your mother not of pointed these things out sooner like age 16 is the legal age for a reason and satutory rape has a age for a reason

Over here it is 18 but we also have a "grey area" if the ages are close enough together. I'm not sure if that would qualify hough....still a bit of a gap there.

Don't feel guilty or anything, OP. What's done is done, no point in freaking out now. All you can do is move forward and kick his ass while you do.

 

[Croc-O-Dile]

I definately think your doing the right thing to stay away from him but I do have a few questions. You said you started seeing him when you were just 15 and he told you he was 21? We now know that he was lying, and he is 24 but did you not see anything wrong with going out with someone that is 21? You were still underage then, and he was too old for you. Did your mum not see anything wrong with that age? Did she know that you were sleeping with someone who claimed to be 21, when you were only 15? Im not blaming you hun at all, I am just curious as to why this has all flared up because you have found out he is 3 years older than what he originally said as whichever way you look at it, the whole thing has been illegal.

While it would still be illegal if he was 21, it wouldn't be "new". I've always run with an older crowd and never been mentally interested in guys my age. I went through a lot of problems one year and moved out (at 14 ) and into my 20 year old boyfriend's house. In his defence, he is actually slow. Sweetest guy you'll ever meet, but mentally he's not all there.
My poor mom, I really put her through hell, was literally out of options because I was too smart with loopholes that I never was actually breaking the law the whole time I was running about. (NJ is a messed up state)
So when I came home with FOB she tried to stop me at first, but I kept talking to him anyway (Stupid, stupid, stupid ) She met him and was friendly with him, but she was never okay with me dating him.
I feel terrible that I was so crazy before. And I feel even worse because my mom literally couldn't do anything about it. But that's the past is the past. (We did find out eventually that my medication was causing the craziness. I was actually having an allergic reaction to it the entire year I was on it.)

 

[Lyrah]

Oh hun that's awful! I'm so sorry!

You are doing the right thing though. You weren't to know hun, we all make mistakes and this one wasn't your fault in any way at all.

Good on you for having such wonderful strength

xxxxxxxx

 

[Croc-O-Dile]

i couldn't of put it better myself it was wrong to start off with never mind the added age my mom would of kicked my f**king arse if i'd of strolled in with a 21 year old and would of had him done for rape there and then its not your fault but your mother is a part to blame the adults around you are supposed to protect you i do think your doing right now but should your mother not of pointed these things out sooner like age 16 is the legal age for a reason and satutory rape has a age for a reason

If this was a normal case, I'd agree. But there was so much that happened prior to my meeting FOB that contributed to the way my mother reacted.
In New Jersey a parent can not press stat. rape chargers on behalf of their child unless their child is deemed mentally disabled or if they are under the age of 16 and the parent has physical proof. (I.E pregnancy, sex tape, sex pictures, ect.) It's messed up, I know.
I've only been back home for 2 years, 2 years prior to that I was living in all different places. Sometimes with family, sometimes with friends, either way I was a messed up child. None of these were "parent approved" moves either (except with family) I ran away all the time. My mom and I fought like cats and dogs. Everything is 100% better now, as it was the medication I was on that made me act like that. (ironically I was on said medication to PREVENT acting like that) But even though things have been swell, my mother is quite traumatized from the whole thing. Like I've said, I feel horrible about the whole thing and think about it every day.
She literally tried everything, to the point where the local police knew her by name and were working WITH her to try and find some legal way to get me home and safe. But sadly New Jersey has such f*cked up laws that they couldn't.

She was walking on eggshells when I brought FOB home because she didn't want me to run off again. Not that I had in over a year, but if you went through the shit she went through with me, you'd understand the fear.

 

[Mellie1988]

Oh my god, glad you got away from him when you did, I would def be taking more action though...as others have said, he will be doing the same thing to people your age or even younger? I think its really sick, I wouldn't be able to sleep at night knowing he was still out their manipulating young children and potentially forcing them into things they don't want to do It actually makes me really sad/sick to think about it...

 

[lui-moo]

aww sweetie thats so horrible. My sister went through a similar thing.. makes me feel sick to know theres people out there like that, get on you for standing up to him. Your so right to get parental rights and looks like you have great support from your mum. your going to have a gawjus little girl soon xx

 

[Windmills]

I definately think your doing the right thing to stay away from him but I do have a few questions. You said you started seeing him when you were just 15 and he told you he was 21? We now know that he was lying, and he is 24 but did you not see anything wrong with going out with someone that is 21? You were still underage then, and he was too old for you. Did your mum not see anything wrong with that age? Did she know that you were sleeping with someone who claimed to be 21, when you were only 15? Im not blaming you hun at all, I am just curious as to why this has all flared up because you have found out he is 3 years older than what he originally said as whichever way you look at it, the whole thing has been illegal.

While it would still be illegal if he was 21, it wouldn't be "new". I've always run with an older crowd and never been mentally interested in guys my age. I went through a lot of problems one year and moved out (at 14 ) and into my 20 year old boyfriend's house. In his defence, he is actually slow. Sweetest guy you'll ever meet, but mentally he's not all there.
My poor mom, I really put her through hell, was literally out of options because I was too smart with loopholes that I never was actually breaking the law the whole time I was running about. (NJ is a messed up state)
So when I came home with FOB she tried to stop me at first, but I kept talking to him anyway (Stupid, stupid, stupid ) She met him and was friendly with him, but she was never okay with me dating him.
I feel terrible that I was so crazy before. And I feel even worse because my mom literally couldn't do anything about it. But that's the past is the past. (We did find out eventually that my medication was causing the craziness. I was actually having an allergic reaction to it the entire year I was on it.)

I completely agree with EternalRose.. also, I don't feel it's fair to call him a paedophile. Especially as, IMO at least, the difference between 21 and 24 isn't very big at all.
Also, the part I've bolded- why would you call FOB a paedophile but not this guy?

 

[aob1013]

Get his parental rights signed over asap x

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

I am sorry to hear this x