Frustrated! Just blowing off steam!

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - Third Trimester' started by Aapoll, Nov 18, 2011.

  1. Aapoll

    Aapoll Well-Known Member

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    I apologize in advance for the novel and for my first thread being a rant but I am just so frustrated!
    First off I live in a very rural area and I had no family here so when my husband told me of a job opportunity for my uncle I jumped on the opportunity for them to move out here (his wife is my age plus their 2 kids are the same age as mine), so they moved out here. After staying with us for 2 months they found a place to rent which costs WAY too much to rent. So they moved into this place and everything has gone downhill since.
    I am doing everything I can to help, but my hubby is to the point where he doesn't care anymore and doesn't wanna hear about it because we have helped so much and every bit of advice we have given has gone in one ear and out the other! I watched their kids for 2 months to free up daycare costs but I had to stop because I am now 30 weeks pregnant with my 3rd child and watching 2 16 month olds everyday was getting to be too much ( the older ones are 6 so were in school for most of the day) we helped them move, I gave them 20 bags of recycling to take in for refund, plus we had offered to pay down payment for mortgage if they wanted to buy( they decided not to last minute) and gave them another option of a place to rent ( not the perfect house but nothing wrong with it and would save them over $900 a month) but they didn't take it. Now in 2 months they have gotten so far behind they have no money for Xmas and half their bills. I hear about it all the time because they are obviously upset over this especially with Xmas just around the corner.
    Sooo my hubby has said he is done helping and I understand this it's frustrating... But I can't turn my back so yesterday me and my sil went and bought $400 worth of meat and groceries for them secretly ( they figured it was me but I won't admit it) in hopes of freeing up some money for Xmas, I requested an Xmas hamper for them, and found free care for their daughter for before and after school to free up another few hundred dollars.
    I am mentally exhausted! They Are getting depressed and saying they wish they never moved out here and I feel like it's somehow all my fault and I should be doing more! Anyways I don't know what I am looking for here I just had to write it down to get it out of my head I think. I just feel so bad like I caused it and I can't talk to my hubby about it anymore :( thanks for reading even if it's highly confusing
     
  2. aley28

    aley28 2 boys & a girl <3

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    That sounds incredibly frustrating. :hugs: Good on you for continuing to try to help out, though, honestly, they're going to have to figure it out sooner or later!
     
  3. Duejan2012

    Duejan2012 mommy of dd, ds, & preggo

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    yes hun please just be happy with what you have done already! You shouldnt have to take care of them when you have your own family and yourself to take care of. None of it is your fault some people just dont know how to manage money. But please you have been great with them and have dont alot. If they keep taking more and more then you also need to put your foot down and tell them you are not going to hellp anymore!
     
  4. forevertired

    forevertired Well-Known Member

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    Could they get some temporary assistance until they are back on their feet?
     
  5. _jellybean_

    _jellybean_ Well-Known Member

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    It's not your fault. You've helped them a ton. They are adults, and need to stand on their own two feet. Can you give them a move-out date, but in a really nice way?
     

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