Fussy Baby Support

[jenniferttc1]

Hang in there ladies! My little boy was doing so great since learning to sit and crawl and entertaining for hours and a week later it all went to shit! I've had such a rough week with 4 new top teeth all coming in at once he screamed all day and night literally. By the last night I was in tears bawling with him. Finally the 4th tooth broke through and he is happy again! Teethibg is so rough and I hate it for him and my sanity. Oh well got 6 of those bitches down and out of the way

 

[lysh]

Noell and Jennifer- Thank you for the uplifting words!!! I guess we all have those days where we just feel like we have had enough. Today is just one of those days! I would respond more, but baby girl just finished nursing and needs attention!

 

[bananaz]

Thanks for the words of encouragement, ladies. And thank you so much for being brave enough to talk about feeling regret over this motherhood business! I love my girl but I definitely feel that way more often than I'd care to admit

Today and yesterday have been rough. I think these a lot of her current fussiness is just out of boredom. She can be in a full-on screaming fit that I can't calm her down from and then a new face comes along and suddenly she's smiling and cooing (until the face goes away, and then it's back to screaming).

I also can no longer put her down on her playmat because she immediately flips onto her belly and then starts flailing around like she's tring to crawl, but of course she can't do that yet so she gets frustrated and starts screaming. So basically my choices are carrying her around in different positions hoping to find one that she likes for more than 30 seconds or plopping her in the Jumperoo, which I can't leave her in for very long because she gets overstimulated

She's also been really distractable and I've had a hard time getting her to nurse properly, so on top of being bored she's probably also hungry and that makes her even grumpier.

Off to try to put her down for a nap. Wish me luck

 

[lysh]

Bananaz- Yes, I think being honest about our feelings is a good thing because then we realize it is probably more normal than we think!!! In the end none of us really wants to not have our babies in our lives, but there are those moments (especially when dealing with a fussy LO!).

I could not help but laugh while reading your post.....no matter what there is no winning! I doubt you were laughing during those moments, but I am sure many of us can relate. I can just see Claire getting frustrated when she gets to that point. As it is, she does not deal with tummy time for very long!

How did nap time go?

 

[bananaz]

I could not help but laugh while reading your post.....no matter what there is no winning! I doubt you were laughing during those moments, but I am sure many of us can relate. I can just see Claire getting frustrated when she gets to that point. As it is, she does not deal with tummy time for very long!

Yes, it would definitely be funny if it weren't so frustrating! I'm looking forward to getting to the point where I can look back and laugh at all of this

 

[aliss]

Right now I wish there was a return label on this whole mommy thing- I know I will feel guilty feeling this way when I am not so sleep deprived, but right now I am just feeling beat up.

Do not feel guilty. It is so normal to feel that way! My LO was extremely fussy as a newborn (seems to be growing out of it somewhat) and at 10 weeks I had a moment. I was giving her a bath and I looked down at her and thought, "What have I done? I can't be someone's mother. I'm not prepared". Mind you, I was very sleep deprived at the time, waking every 90 minutes as you are now. I had to put my baby in her crib and walk outside my house and just cry. It was awful. I wanted to run away. Having a child is such a huge shock to the system. With hormones, sleep deprivation and depression it can be very hard. Having a fussy baby makes it even more difficult.

There is a light at the end of the tunnel. My LO is 15 weeks old and has improved immensely. 3 months really did seem to be the turning point for us. Some days are better than others, but there are more good days and it makes the tough days more bearable. Although I might have 3 days or broken sleep (going through 4 month wakefulness now, I believe), she will often give me a gift on the 4th day of sleeping 8 straight hours. Recharing really helps. Although she can still be fussy, she smiles and engages now and is much more fun to be around. I still have my days... but it gets better. Hang in there ladies.

My advice is to take it one day at a time. When you're in this stage, it feels like you will never, ever have a life again and it will be like this forever. Take heart that it won't.

This ^^^^^x a million.

Do I miss the first 6 months of my boy's life?

Nope. Not a darn thing. And I have no regrets for that. I don't know anyone who would have enjoyed it.

Do I look back and laugh? Well, I think back to some of the elaborate routines we did (a double swaddle that required OH holding him down, silly rocking for 30 minutes, a ninja run after putting him down in a swing, all at once, or him falling off a swing - twice - because I was too scared strapping him in would wake him!!)

I think I just block out those 6 months and I have no desire to get them back. I hope that day comes for you girls soon too!

My mom said the same thing. Apparently, this was just revenge

 

[veganmama]

do any of your babies get whiney when your out? mine seems to have never ending grunts that then turn into cries (mostly because hes tired but i cant rock him to sleep in public) lol

going out is def a nightmare for me since i take the bus. i have to take both stroller and carrier since he cant be in either for more then like an hour

 

[lysh]

veganmama- I don't take my lo out much so it is hard to say. It must be hectic lugging a baby and all of that gear though!

How is everyone doing? We had a few good days and now we are backtracking again. She has okay moments but switches on a dime....bad night too. Gas was waking her up again.

 

[MrsButterfly]

Hey ladies. We'd had some really good days but gone way back again now. Awful nights sleep and his total refusal to go down for a nap anywhere but on me is really starting to get me down. Don't know what to do to improve the situation without leaving him to cry. So so stressed at the moment

 

[Noelle610]

Hey ladies. We'd had some really good days but gone way back again now. Awful nights sleep and his total refusal to go down for a nap anywhere but on me is really starting to get me down. Don't know what to do to improve the situation without leaving him to cry. So so stressed at the moment

Do you have a swing? I would swaddle my LO, put her in the swing and pop a paci (dummy) in her mouth around that time and it almost always worked.

 

[lysh]

mrsbutterfly- I am sorry...I completely understand how you feel. I wish I had the answer!

Noell- My LO hates swings and being swaddled. lol

My girl had hr shots yesterday. She ended up with a low grade fever but is doing okay. She slept more than usual last night. We also started her on zantac for reflux. So we shall see!

 

[bananaz]

MrsButterfly - I'm so sorry things have been tough for you lately. I know that when my LO's sleep is messed up everything else feels 100x harder. I hope you guys have had a better day today

lysh - I'm glad the shots didn't go too badly. Keep us posted on how the Zantac works for your girl! Fingers crossed it makes a big difference for her.


We are doing okay here. I've been taking her out a lot more lately and it helps the days go by faster, plus she's less fussy when she's around new people and in new environments (though she does tend to get overstimulated and then crash later if I push her too far). I've found that I need to take her out in the car at least once a day if I want her to sleep at night, so that's definitely good motivation to get out of the house.

In general things I will say that things are getting easier. Part of it is that she has become somewhat more patient and distractable, but I think the biggest factor is that I've adjusted my expectations. I guess I've just accepted the fact that I have an active, easily bored baby who needs my attention most of the time that she's awake and I no longer expect to be able to just set her down and let her entertain herself, so it's less frustrating when I have to spend 80-90% of my day trying to keep her happy. I think I also know her a lot better at this point and can much more easily figure out why she's upset and how to fix it quickly.

Anyway, sucking on my wrist is no longer cutting it for entertainment so it's time to run

 

[MrsButterfly]

Hey ladies. We'd had some really good days but gone way back again now. Awful nights sleep and his total refusal to go down for a nap anywhere but on me is really starting to get me down. Don't know what to do to improve the situation without leaving him to cry. So so stressed at the moment

Do you have a swing? I would swaddle my LO, put her in the swing and pop a paci (dummy) in her mouth around that time and it almost always worked.

Yeah he has a swing but can't seem to drop off to sleep in it

Weve had a couple of better days. And put him in his cot last night. I went in at 2.30am and popped his dummy in and he slept till 3.30am - at that point he was v upset so I hopped in the bed in his room and had him in with me. Feels like good progress still so pleased Just need to sort napping out...

Lysh - good luck with zantac - hope it helps let us know how it goes.

Bananaz - I totally agree - if I get out the house if only to the local shops it makes for a much easier day. My lo also loves the car. Glad you're finding it easier

 

[lysh]

Well the Zantac is helping her with her discomfort, but she is still fussy! lol She is a bit better though as she is not uncomfortable all of the time, but a lot of it is just her personality.

Bananaz- I agree- it is much easier once we just accept this is who our child is and we just have to adapt to it.

Mrs. Butterfly- Good for you for making progress with the cot! We continue to make progress too....my LO spends most of the night in her cosleeper now. Now that we are having luck though I am afraid she is going to grow out of it soon!!!! At her checkup the doc told us she is the size of a 4 month old! lol We are a tall family, so she is definitely going to be a tall girl!

 

[MrsButterfly]

My lo is very big too. At 9 weeks he was 14lb 7oz! My husband is tall though so he's taking after him. How big is your little girl now Lysh?

Night two of the cot is beginning. He's gone down ok for now but normally sleeps ok until 10-11pm. Fingers crossed he does ok. I've ordered some cot airwrap as he was getting his arms caught up last night which woke him up.

Hope you're having good days my lo has barely napped today as we've been out and about so not sure if that will bode well for tonight or not....

 

[lysh]

At 9 weeks she was 12lbs 13oz and 24 inches long....well last night was an okay night for the first half. She actually almost got a 4 hour stretch and then had a 2 hour stretch. After that was rougher...up within every hour and then awake at around 4 with gas pains. She was wiggly and fussy (even though sleepy) for 2 hours after that until I got my DH to take her so I could sleep for another hour or so.

I am still on dairy elimination and tomato elimination. The doc gave me an elimination diet to try if the zantac did not show huge improvement. At this point though....I am not sure if just gas and fussiness signal a food allergy. This diet has about 15 safe foods for me to eat and that is about it. I already have anemic issues and I cannot afford to loose anymore weight, so I am not sure if it is the direction to take. It could simply just be her personality and immature digestive system at this point

Is it normal to have gas that wakes a baby up during the night? It bothers her mostly during the evening hours. I just do not want to go through all of this food allergy stuff if it is something she will probably grow out of anyway.....she does not have diarrhea anymore and never gets rashes or anything. Any thoughts?

 

[lysh]

How is everyone doing? I started a total elimination diet for her reflux and gas pains that wake her up constantly. I am not enjoying it as I love my food, but since I already had to give up dairy/tomatoes I already got used to not eating my favorites!

Sleep getting any better for anyone? How about putting your LOs down?

 

[bananaz]

Is it normal to have gas that wakes a baby up during the night? It bothers her mostly during the evening hours. I just do not want to go through all of this food allergy stuff if it is something she will probably grow out of anyway.....she does not have diarrhea anymore and never gets rashes or anything. Any thoughts?

I don't know if it's normal by my LO had that issue for the first couple months. She would always wake up at 4am grunting and in pain, and if I managed to get her back to sleep she would just toss and turn for an hour before waking again. Finally I started doing colic massage + a Windi session before bed, and sometimes in the middle of the night too, and that seemed to help her.

I started a total elimination diet for her reflux and gas pains that wake her up constantly. I am not enjoying it as I love my food, but since I already had to give up dairy/tomatoes I already got used to not eating my favorites!

How long have you been on it? Have you noticed any improvement so far? I started my diet on a Monday and by Thursday her fussiness had decreased and her daytime sleep improved dramatically. It was kind of amazing to watch her be able to really relax for the first time since her colic had started. Of course, she was still "high needs" and fussy after that but she finally started having some non-fussy awake time and she actually took real naps during the day, which she hadn't been doing before.

Anyway, I hope you have success with your diet! I know I gladly would've lived on dog food if it meant a happier, less screamy baby And now that I've identified most of my LO's problem foods I'm eating almost normally again.

Sleep has been going really well here for the past couple weeks, with the exception of last night when she was up and down constantly and I had to spend 30-40 minutes resettling her each time I'm hoping it was just because she was in a different swaddle though, so fingers crossed that she'll go back to her amazing 6-8 hour routine tonight because I don't think I can survive another sleep regression!

Her fussiness continues to be pretty much the same, and I think most of it is just because she gets bored so easily. She's started scooting on her belly on the floor to get to things (mama's phone seems to be her #1 target) but she's not very efficient yet so she typically gets frustrated and starts screaming within about 30 seconds. I know she needs time to practice this skill but I'm always so reluctant to put her down because I know it's just going to make her mad!

 

[lysh]

It has been tough finding time where I have both hands to type and write....takes me way too long one-handed!!!

I started the diet on Saturday- I have not seen any improvements yet...last night was actually one of the hardest nights we have had in a while, but this is only day 3. I added avocado and potato chips to my diet. I am also eating Quinoa since that is not a wheat based grain. I know those items are not on the original list, but I needed to add more calories into my diet. The potato chips are made with canola oil and salt, so not that far from the 'list'. I just cannot afford to lose a bunch of weight either.

So hopefully I will see some improvements. If this does not work, I am not sure what to do next. It is hard watching her wake herself up constantly because she is uncomfortable. She is almost 11 weeks old, if it was an immature digestive system I would think there would be some improvement by now. Who knows!

I am glad sleep is going better for you! I am still worried I am going to be battling this when I have to go back to work. I am already dreading going back to work- as draining as some days with LO are, I really do not want to leave her. It will break my heart!

I have noticed that as my LO is becoming more interested in things her fussiness while awake is decreasing. I can put her in her rock-n-play or carseat and she will be so busy looking around and listening to me talk, or watching her toys that she will not get fussy unless she is not getting attention. lol So I can at least cook my lunch or get some cleaning done, as long as I stop often to look directly at her and play and/or talk constantly about what I am doing.

By the way, it craxks me up how much LOs love phones!!!

 

[lysh]

Mrs. Butterfly- I saw in a thread that you put your LO into his own room...how did that go? What did you do to transition him in? Is he sleeping better? I am torn. I have to go back to work in a few months, and I am torn about when to transition her. I know there will probably be crying and I am not sure if I can handle that. Of course, this is only if her reflux is under control. She is fighting me in using her cosleeper again.