Getting Fit Before Baby

[ireadyermind]

I see the line! It's faint, but I see it! My BFP didn't show up until about 5 weeks, even though I tested at what would have been 4. FX!!

Thanks! The lines on the FRERs are getting darker, but these Wondfo HPTs are garbage! I wouldn't have even noticed the first line on Father's day if I hadn't seriously been looking for one! The faint faint Wondfo line is what made me test with a FRER, and of course that one game me a much better result. Phew.

I'm only using FRERs every other day to keep an eye on my lines, but I thought I'd use the Wondfos in the off days so I can see a progression there... nope!

I wonder how they'll look a month from now. haha

 

[swimmyj1]

cupcakestoy - thank you for the advise I think I would see if the specalist will go right for the IVF if we can. But we are going to wait to see how my CD21 labs come back and hes going to keep trying fertilaid for the next few months. if nothing then on to the specialist (sooo expensive lol)

ireadyermind - YAY!!! I'm so excited for you!!! hope that bean is a sticky on and you have a happy and healthy 9 months

 

[ireadyermind]

Finally took a digital this morning, and I was SO nervous!

Someone told me that using the HPTs mid-stream instead of dipping was the best way to go, and I have to say I disagree entirely.

Mid-stream FRER was the same darkness as my FRER from two days ago, but the dipped Wondfo darkened considerably compared to yesterday's!

So I say always dip. It's hard to get enough liquid on the test stick, in my opinion.

 

[swimmyj1]

oh im just so excited for you Keep me updated on how your pregnancy goes!! lots of hugs

 

[ireadyermind]

Thank you!

I have my first appt on Monday. We'll see what due date they give me and whatnot. I'm too excited!

 

[cupcakestoy]

Irym how was your appt?

 

[ireadyermind]

It was crappy!

Let me give you some of the back story:

When I called to make the appointment last week, I told the nurse when my last period was. I have long cycles, so that was May 6th. The nurse said, "Oh, that puts you at 7w4d! We'll get you right in for an appointment!" but I mentioned that I have long cycles and I don't think 7 weeks is right. The nurse replied that the scan would give us a better idea how far along I was, and scheduled me anyway.


So I did some research about what I could expect to see on a scan at 5 weeks. The responses ranged from 'nothing' to 'a whole heck of a lot' and so I wasn't really sure what to expect, but I was SO nervous and just certain I was going to hear the worst....

I meet the midwife, who starts telling me what we should expect to see on an 8 week scan, and once again I have to tell HER that I'm not 8 weeks. I told her that my first +OPK was only 20-some days ago and that 7 weeks is wrong too.

She just kinda stared at me, wasn't really listening, and then went ahead and did the scan -- and couldn't find anything in my uterus. No gestational sac at all, even though I could swear I saw a tiny blip before she moved the wand!

So rather than discussing with us (DH was there too) what could possibly cause this problem, like it being too early, or an ectopic pregnancy, she says, "Well, sometimes the egg never implants like it's supposed to, and that's called a Missed Miscarriage. Sorry!"


Logically, I'm telling myself that it was just too early, and none of those women believed me when I insisted I wasn't 8 weeks along!

I had blood drawn yesterday, I go back for more tomorrow, and I have another scan -- this time by an actual ultrasound tech and not the midwife, who admitted she wasn't really sure what she was seeing! - in 12 days.

DH and I were pretty upset by the whole thing. That midwife acted as though there was no other option but that I had miscarried, and she was entirely uninterested in discussing anything else, and rushed out of the room without even stopping to see if we had any questions!


The only way I've been able to cope is by seeing lots of old forum posts around the 'net where women have had the same problem, empty uterus at 5 weeks, only to go on to see a healthy little embryo and heartbeat at 8 weeks.

I could even be at 4w6d today instead! FF was never 100% certain where to put my cross hairs, and if I go by the first +OPK I could be a few days behind 5 weeks right now.

I can't believe they wouldn't listen to me! I thought for sure a midwife would, since her whole career is pregnancies.... ugh.

 

[cupcakestoy]

Ugh....sorry they seem to be idiots! Hang in there!

 

[swimmyj1]

I'm so sorry that happened!! that is just total crap! my BFF is an ultrasound tech and i asked her about it. She said it isn't that uncommon for you not to be able to see anything at 5 weeks. I am definatly keeping my fingers crossed. Let us know how the blood work comes back. I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you. that was just really insensitive of your midwife ugh (being a nurse who really cares about her patients i can't stand when other health care workers are not compassionate or take time with their patients.)

Have you taken a home pregnancy test again? I hope your labs come back perfect and the 2nd day labs they increase your hcg!

Oh Wish you were closer so i could give ya a hug. Sending you and your DH lots of support.

 

[ireadyermind]

I'm so sorry that happened!! that is just total crap! my BFF is an ultrasound tech and i asked her about it. She said it isn't that uncommon for you not to be able to see anything at 5 weeks. I am definatly keeping my fingers crossed. Let us know how the blood work comes back. I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you. that was just really insensitive of your midwife ugh (being a nurse who really cares about her patients i can't stand when other health care workers are not compassionate or take time with their patients.)

Have you taken a home pregnancy test again? I hope your labs come back perfect and the 2nd day labs they increase your hcg!

Oh Wish you were closer so i could give ya a hug. Sending you and your DH lots of support.

Thanks for asking your friend for me! That was so thoughtful.

Yesterday morning I did another digital test before my appt. It read "pregnant 2 - 3" when last week's was "pregnant 1 - 2" so things SEEM to be progressing... but if they aren't going to tell me my blood test results, I can't really be sure. It's all so aggravating!

 

[swimmyj1]

no no you need to stay positive. Heck doctor offices by me won't even do an ultrasound until you are 12 weeks or further so moms don't get so upset lol. if its increasing in your urine it is defenatly going up in your blood. This is a great sign. If the egg didn't implant it starts dropping pretty quickly. I've had that happen and even at 6 weeks I still only got a 1-2 weeks on the digital. Be very excited (don't worry if you can't be i'll be excited for you hehe) at least until you see your little blip and then can be super excited yourself haha

 

[ireadyermind]

no no you need to stay positive. Heck doctor offices by me won't even do an ultrasound until you are 12 weeks or further so moms don't get so upset lol. if its increasing in your urine it is defenatly going up in your blood. This is a great sign. If the egg didn't implant it starts dropping pretty quickly. I've had that happen and even at 6 weeks I still only got a 1-2 weeks on the digital. Be very excited (don't worry if you can't be i'll be excited for you hehe) at least until you see your little blip and then can be super excited yourself haha

lol -- be excited WITH me! I'm trying to remain positive. The biggest concern I have right now is that it's ectopic, however the ultrasound tech wouldn't say anything to me about the images she captured except that I'll hear back from someone in 48 hours.

I actually just got a notification that my blood test results are back -- but all they released to me was my blood type, and an antibody report!

Why they wouldn't send me my hCG levels is beyond me. I'm entitled to receive a copy of my own records. Grrrrr.

 

[ireadyermind]

Update: Got an email from a different midwife at around 12:30am (whhhhyyyy?).

This midwife says that my hCG levels are very low, which indicates an early pregnancy and may explain why they aren't seeing anything on my ultrasound. I go in for a second blood test today, so fingers crossed!

EDIT: I emailed the midwife back, and told her that I have long cycles and late ovulation (CD33, for crying out loud!), and that I'm NOT 8 weeks right now, I'm 5 or less. SHE listened to me (finally, someone who listens!) and said that my hCG levels were 184 on Monday, which is what they'd expect to see at 5 weeks and makes sense why I wouldn't see anything on an ultrasound.

I am feeling a LOT better about things now. I know that miscarriage is still a possibility, but this midwife at least told me that there were other possibilities as well, and said it's better to be hopeful and wait for the little bean to grow, if it's going to!

So I've already had my 48 blood test done this morning, and we're just waiting to get results back on that. Fingers crossed!

 

[swimmyj1]

yay that hcg is pretty perfect for around then!!! oh so excited. can't wait to hear what your next labs say. My body is not being cool this cycle. FF says I ovulated on CD 10 which I know didn't happen. I should be ovulating today or tomorrow but now my CM is not fertile at all. GRRRRRR not cool. Hoping my labs shed some light on what is happening lol. Maybe I just won't be ovulating this month.

 

[ireadyermind]

yay that hcg is pretty perfect for around then!!! oh so excited. can't wait to hear what your next labs say. My body is not being cool this cycle. FF says I ovulated on CD 10 which I know didn't happen. I should be ovulating today or tomorrow but now my CM is not fertile at all. GRRRRRR not cool. Hoping my labs shed some light on what is happening lol. Maybe I just won't be ovulating this month.

Just got off the phone with the doc.

hCG levels went from 184 (Monday) to 220 today. That's not even a 50% increase.

She said just because they haven't seen anything on the scans doesn't rule out ectopic pregnancy, and I could still miscarry... I have to go back in for another blood draw on Friday. Now I'm not so hopeful any more!

This has been a rollercoaster of a week.

 

[swimmyj1]

no no no you stay positive girly. They went up, plenty of women go on to have healthy beautiful babies without their hcg doubling. I'm sure you already have but google it, a lot of doctors have started to say that the 50% jump isn't very reliable and it scares more woman than anything. I will keep my fingers and toes crossed for you and remain the positive friend lol. I don't want you to get any bad news

It's too early to see anything on the scans. But if you do start getting a lot of pain on one side go to the ER (just in case). hang in there try not to stress too much (i know impossible to do) but go do something fun. I wish i was there to hug you for sure now.

 

[cupcakestoy]

Sorry your in limbo. Hope your little bean surprises everyone!

 

[swimmyj1]

hey i was thinking about you today. How ru doing?

 

[ireadyermind]

Hey gals!

I was away spending the Independence Day weekend with family. On the road out to Mom's house, I got a call about my Friday blood draw.

HCG levels are dropping.

6/29 - 184
7/1 - 220
7/3 - 180

They're certain it's a miscarriage, and I go back in for yet another test Monday morning, plus I need a RhoGAM shot since I'm AB-. They want to make sure my levels are actually continuing to drop to confirm the miscarriage.

Meanwhile, no cramping, spotting, or bleeding. I feel pretty much the same as I have the past several weeks, so I'm not really sure what to expect at this point. Some gals compare miscarriages to giving birth, others say it's like a bad visit from AF, others have no issues at all. Sigh.

I have to admit, though, that I was a little relieved when I heard the verdict. Not because I don't want to be pregnant, but because I hated NOT KNOWING! Before, this pregnancy could go in one of three directions and no one could give me any details. Now, we've pretty much narrowed it down to the one option: miscarriage. I can mourn my loss, regroup, and try again.

If my levels are back up on tomorrow's test, I'm going to go CRAZY! lol

 

[swimmyj1]

ireadyermind - awe hun I'm so sorry my MC was just like a really bad AF and it lasted almost 2 weeks (not the painful part, that only lasted about 3 days).

I'm glad you have a goal of grieving and trying again. Hang in there girly I hope you have had some fun at your families for the holiday. Let me know how your testing goes.