Getting signed off work due to pregnancy?

[Tryforbaby]

Hi Girls,

I was wondering if I can get some advice. It might be a bit late ass I've got a docs appointment in just over an hour. I am so scared that he won't sign me off.

I've been through the wars lately. Found out that my husband has been cheating on me (last week I found out) and lying about where he is and what he's doing. I panicked last week and I've been thinking about trying to find somewhere else to move to without him. My head is all over the place. I'm also suffering with terrible MS which seems to be lasting the day, not sleeping at night and having to sleeping during the days. I have constant thrush which I'm sure is worst because of the stress and I've got pelvic pains and strange hip pains which I'm not sure what it is. I feel like a mess and I've already told work that I'm signed off for the next two weeks which was probably stupid but I panicked about my boss trying to get my to fly to Ireland for two weeks. He has made my workload higher and is not taking my pregnancy into any consideration with asking me to do things. I am so depressed and fainted on the tube last week which lead to my having three days off work self cert.

I feel like a mess and need the next few weeks to figure out what I'm going to do. I'm so worried about the little one suffering because of all this and can only see this getting worst if I soldier on. The thing is what if I get an unsympathetic doctor who won't sign me off? I'm terrified!

Any advice?

 

[birdiex]

I don't have advice but I really hope you get a good doctor, and I hope you're feeling better soon

 

[crazylilth1ng]

Darling.... The morning sickness itself is a good enough reason to take time off in my opinion let alone the other stuff!! I myself am informing work today that I'm taking my next 2 shifts off as I feel too ill to cope being there at the moment, and if I'm no better at all next week I'm going to see my dr.

Since when has soldiering on actually benefitted anyone?? The very term soldiering implies it is at your expense. Thst is one of my mothers phrases and one we frequently fall out over. You need rest!

If your dr won't sign unoff after u explain all that u need to change to one more caring!

 

[Eleanor80]

Sounds like you need to be signed off due to stress rather than pregnancy although it is a contributing factor. I would be surprised if you don't get signed off. If not it depends on where you work but speak to your HR own up to your lie and explain the situation and hopefully that will deal with your boss who should not be upping your workload. As for flying it is unreasonable for him to force you given the stage of pregnancy. At the very least perhaps the doctor can write a note to say you shouldn't fly. As for everything else I feel for you so good luck xxx

 

[Eternal]

most doctors will sign you for for a bit

the pelvis pain and hip pain your experincing is SPD/PGP, its a pregnancy condition where your ligaments in your pelvis sofen up too soon and start moving, it usually gets worse as the pregancy gets and and rest and physio help.

As for long term, if you get signed off long term your maternity will be brought forward and you will be on reduced money for the whole of your maternity leave.

As for your boss, does he know your pregnant? you should have a risk assisment done at work to determine what you are able and not able to do. if you dont feel you are being treated in a safe manner for your child then called HR and they have to investigate.

 

[Tryforbaby]

Thank you for your quick responses. In reflection it was stupid to say that I already had this before I do. I do know that if I'm signed off with stress they can hold this against me as it's not a pregnancy related illness. I've got two colleagues who were worked into the ground whilst pregnant working for this company and one had her baby boy at six months. She is in a legal battle with them about the stress but it is hard to prove.

I knew it would all be hard but the news about my husband has knocked me for six and I feel that this had made all my symptoms ten times worst. I worry about my vomiting as sometimes I can't keep water down. I've lost quite a bit of weight over the last week (although I look odd as I've got small legs and a round tummy and huge boobs lol).

 

[Stephannie]

Your DR would be mad not to sign you off hun x

I had a similar situation in the past and found out i was expecting just after finding out OH had been cheating Im not sure to be honest how I coped but I do remember being signed off for two weeks just to get myself rest and get my thoughts straight x

Thinking of you and your LO x

 

[Tryforbaby]

Yes my boss knows that I'm pregnant but as soon as I told him he said well that should not effect anything and I need to wait another three weeks for my risk assessment that I've tried to get moved forward as he's trying to change my KPIs again. I have not told anyone about what has happened with my husband as I am unsure about what I'm going to do about it. Thank you for the info on my hips I was getting quite worried about it as I can not stand on my left leg alone at present.

The only one good thing in my life is this little one and that is what I'm trying to protect at the moment.

 

[Tryforbaby]

Your DR would be mad not to sign you off hun x

I had a similar situation in the past and found out i was expecting just after finding out OH had been cheating Im not sure to be honest how I coped but I do remember being signed off for two weeks just to get myself rest and get my thoughts straight x

Thinking of you and your LO x

Thank you Stephannie. I feel like a zombie and hope that the doc will be nice about all this. Need to do the best by myself and my little one now. x

 

[Eternal]

The SPD is a nightmare, its not usual to get it that early though, i had it with my first at 9 weeks but that was after a bad car accident which started it off.

This time i have had it about 3 weeks but its twins so there is even extra hormorone and weight so thats why i again had it that early, my last pregnancy i lost at 11 weeks and never had any symptoms of it from that, so guessing it wouldnt have effected until later.

but the stress maybe could be a factor in it too. who knows, my advice would be seek a physio asap, they can give you advice and supports.

 

[Tryforbaby]

The SPD is a nightmare, its not usual to get it that early though, i had it with my first at 9 weeks but that was after a bad car accident which started it off.

This time i have had it about 3 weeks but its twins so there is even extra hormorone and weight so thats why i again had it that early, my last pregnancy i lost at 11 weeks and never had any symptoms of it from that, so guessing it wouldnt have effected until later.

but the stress maybe could be a factor in it too. who knows, my advice would be seek a physio asap, they can give you advice and supports.

Thank you Eternal. I will ask the doc today as I have done a lot of sports in my youth which involved flexibility so wonder if that might be related. I competed with gymnastics and did synchronised swimming so was forever stretching. Never experienced this before and I feel like an old lady trying to get off the sofa. Worried about what I'll be like further down the line

 

[Stephannie]

Your DR would be mad not to sign you off hun x

I had a similar situation in the past and found out i was expecting just after finding out OH had been cheating Im not sure to be honest how I coped but I do remember being signed off for two weeks just to get myself rest and get my thoughts straight x

Thinking of you and your LO x

Thank you Stephannie. I feel like a zombie and hope that the doc will be nice about all this. Need to do the best by myself and my little one now. x

No problem at all hun I know how hard it can be but we all know how is best for ourselves how to deal with it, I took time off, cried alot and slept alot. Try to look on the bright side, i know its hard, you have your LO and they are growing quickly and will help you through all of this x

 

[Eternal]

When i was still working i thought i would be in a wheelchair by the end, and that does happen to some women, but once i finished i took it easy and limitied what i did and it was much better.

its a case of listening to the physio and really thinking about limitied your use of stairs, lifting etc. At one point i was on strong painkillers which obviously isnt ideal during pregnancy, so listen to your body and when it says no, try and listen.

 

[MammyEvans20]

Awh hun thats terrible i wish you and your little one the best, as you said you need to concentrate on whats best for you and your baby!

 

[nicb26]

Hi honey, just wanted to say so sorry to hear about your husband and your other worries. I hope the doctor was nice and signed you off. If not, go to a different doctor. Take care and try to rest xx

 

[Tryforbaby]

Hi Girls

Just to let you know it went OK with the docs although he has signed me off for a week and will reassess me next week which I suppose is normal. The one thing I'm not sure about is he has written reason as vomiting in pregnancy which was one of the things I told him I'm suffering with. I'm now worried that the fact that it's one week and vomiting seems a bit lame. He said he could not sign me off due to stress and my husband as it would not count as pregnancy related. He was a family man which is nice.

 

[Tryforbaby]

Oh and he has had no experience with hip pain and has asked me to keep an eye on it and then tell him next week. Think I'm going to talk to midwife about this instead. x

 

[flump1]

hi, sorry your having such a rough time! I wouldnt worry about being signed off i have been signed off for the past 6 weeks due to bad ms and i dont plan on going back until i feel well enough. Whats most important is you look after yourself and your little bean, work deffinately needs to come second now

I was really stressed about having time off at first but realised that all that matters is that my baby is ok and work will just have to be put further down on my list of priorities.

Take care x

 

[beccad]

Glad you've got the week off hun. Sounds like you're really going through the mill at the moment xx

 

[AngelBunny]

Hi Girls

Just to let you know it went OK with the docs although he has signed me off for a week and will reassess me next week which I suppose is normal. The one thing I'm not sure about is he has written reason as vomiting in pregnancy which was one of the things I told him I'm suffering with. I'm now worried that the fact that it's one week and vomiting seems a bit lame. He said he could not sign me off due to stress and my husband as it would not count as pregnancy related. He was a family man which is nice.

you've done the right thing i've been off for a month now, the doctor keeps signing me off because of fast heart rate, high blood pressure & low blood sugars, i would be able to deal with it but im a nursing assistant on the busiest ward in the hospital running around under a lot of stress for 12 hour shifts. im back tomorrow but the past month has been invaluable to me & i'm sure LO has appreciated mummy not being a stress-head for a bit hope you're feeling better soon, and remember if you're not fit to work, don't work. they have to pay you & any pregnancy-related sickness isn't counted toward your normal sickness absence xx