Home birth and Natural parenting!

[lozzy21]

I will be hopefully having a home birth, i hate hospitals, they are where you go when you are ill and unless there are complications pregnancy is not an illness. I will be breastfeeding, i dont plan on saying i want to do it for x amount of time just what feels right but for hopefully for as long as possible. I want to use reusables because they are cheeper and are better for the enviroment. I will be using a sling as an alternative to a buggy (will still have a buggy) but will not be using attachment parenting. I will be weaning when my baby needs it wether its at 4 months or at 9. Baby will be in a cot by my bed untill atleast 6m.

 

[Georgie90]

hi hun!

I dont really know why but mine are the complete opposite!

I want to;
go to the hospital to give birth
use disposables
bottle feed (formula)

I'm not judging or criticising you and I don't mean to start a whole breastfeeding discussion but do you mind me asking why you're planning to bottle feed? Do you have medical reasons or do you just not fancy the idea of breastfeeding. I'm really just curious, don't mean to preach or convert you. Just wondering what advantages you see in bottle feeding?

its no problem hun!

to be totally honest, i could be converted...its mainly because, everyone in my family, and all my friends have bottle fed, so to me its the 'norm' so to speak.

A more personal opinion, is that i want Daddy and other family members to share the experiance of feeding with baby and with me, but that could change when babys here (and i dont want to upset anyone)

I also have an ED anorexia, so i cant say how i will be when a babys here...i may feel that i eat a lot to help the baby etc, but because my disorder is so unreliable i cant say how i would feel, i would hate to not be able to provide healthy milk for my child so feel safer to forula feed, also theres less chance my ED would come up again as it tends to happen when theres a lot of pressure on me

how comes your so against it? Im not going to argue it out! genuanly intrested!
xxxx

Just to clarify there: I'm not against bottle feeding at all! I'm just for breastfeeding. I think babies can grow up perfectly happy and healthy on formula. I just think breastfeeding gives both baby and you so many extra benefits. For starters there are lots of good things in breastmilk that help your babies immune system and general development. But it's also so much more convenient (sterilise bottle, heat water, mix formula, make sure it's not too hot vs take your boob out ), cheaper and always on tab. It also helps you bond and mummy to heal and get back to her pre-baby body.
I can understand that you'd be worried about your anorexia though. I don't think there'd be anything to worry about nutrition wise (you could always top up with formula. If baby get confused and doesn't want the breast after a bottle there's also expressing). But if you think it's going to cause you too much stress then I think that's a good reason. I also understand the getting-daddy-involved argument although I think we can bond in other ways. But if you feel strongly about that then maybe expressing would be good? Not ver convenient but good for baby and can be monitored easily (in terms of amounts). If you're unsure about whether breastfeeding is for you you cod always read a really good book on it or find a breastfeeding association online and get more info there?

when we TTC and i get preg i will talk more to OH about it an get more info as im pretty clueless, thats why i said its not ruled out completely, im just aware of what may happen (anorexiawise) and wouldnt want to jeapodise my health and happyness, and put my baby at risk of having a bad mum because im ill again!

I would probably find expressing ok, and that probably could be an option, but i would like to give OH the job of making up bottles from time to time
no in all serioussness i think if i breastfed i would feel as if OH is missing out on bonding, and would liek to share that experiance with him...

I like the idea of baby carrying and cloth nappies tho!
x

 

[Amygdala]

Just wanted to add this in case anyone's interested: https://www.breastfeeding.nhs.uk/

 

[morri]

I hink the good ressources are also to find in the natural parenting are ^^

 

[trumpetbum]

I'm a bit of a crunchy mama. I don't look it though..I shave my legs I loved it, and I really see the difference in my youngest who was breastfed for two years (6m exclusively then with finger food etc), worn in a sling, coslept etc. She was born at home, had a wee cloth bum and nursing necklaces work really well in my experience. My niece who is 13months isn't breastfed but she loves playing with shiny chunky necklaces, it's much the same for a breastfed baby. Go for it if it suits you, I'll be doing it all again *hopefully this year* in much the same way. Any Q's don't hesitate, I had a wonderfully supportive internet group who no longer exist when I was expecting mine and it really helped me.

 

[lozzy21]

Georgie, the girls i know who have an ED have said breastfeeding was better for them because it helped them eat better because they knew they were responsible for feeding some one else.


I also want to breastfeed because when family come over and baby is getting passed from person to person (ie mil is hogging it) I can say i need to have baby back to feeding her.

 

[Georgie90]

Lozzy, I won’t know how it will affect me until baby’s here, it may well be the case that I will eat healthy for baby, but my ED tends to make me extremely selfish, I don’t want to end up begrudging the baby because its his/her fault that I have to eat iyswim?

Its very hard to explain, and to know how I’m going to feel…x

Also, i wnat baby to be enjoyed by everyone, it can be our time when family are not around, xxx

 

[trumpetbum]

A more personal opinion, is that i want Daddy and other family members to share the experiance of feeding with baby and with me, but that could change when babys here (and i dont want to upset anyone)

I feel the same about wanting OH to be able to bond over feeding, but I really want to breastfeed since it's best for baby and for bonding so I'm hoping to express so OH can give her a feed regularly too.

Just throwing this in there because it's a common worry. My dh didn't feed my youngest at all, she only had a few expressed bottles from gran when babysat. What we did was plenty of skin to skin cuddles in the beginning with dad, and made sure that dh took plenty of turns to cuddle, bathe and rock the wee one after feeds. Bottlefeedings kinda overrated for daddy bonding imho, especially if baby prefers the breast. It's not difficult to bond without it. Both girls have a fantastic bond with grans and aunts/uncles who enjoyed both girls equally. They soon get over the idea of not being able to put a bottle in their mouth if they're able to indulge in lots of cuddles and play.

 

[trumpetbum]

Also, I do semi-cosleeping til 6 months then its into cot and own room but think me and OH will get a bigger bed for the next LO cos doubles arent big enough haha.

I didn't do home birth for my 1st cos I didnt know how my body would cope with pain of labour but I managed well on gas and air and a shot of diamorphine to help me sleep but I think I could manage without it and hopefully I wont have a back2back labour with my next baby. I'm going to do hypnobirthing too with my next labour


p.s. Its great you're all for slings but omg you have no idea how heavy a 6 month old baby is

My 6 month old was a heffalump, she was in her sling regularly until 18 m then occassionally until she was 3. The slings are designed to evenly distribute weight, and when you're using them regularly it just becomes second nature. I definitely couldn't have carried around my 6 month to three year old in my arms for long periods, but had no problem with the sling.

 

[lozzy21]

Georgie you dont know my MIL, i would never get baby back, Last time we was pissed she was saying some thing like she would look after our baby overnight from it beeing a week old and how i needed to bottle feed so she could do this. I told her she could take a run and jump.

 

[Blah11]

Also, I do semi-cosleeping til 6 months then its into cot and own room but think me and OH will get a bigger bed for the next LO cos doubles arent big enough haha.

I didn't do home birth for my 1st cos I didnt know how my body would cope with pain of labour but I managed well on gas and air and a shot of diamorphine to help me sleep but I think I could manage without it and hopefully I wont have a back2back labour with my next baby. I'm going to do hypnobirthing too with my next labour


p.s. Its great you're all for slings but omg you have no idea how heavy a 6 month old baby is

My 6 month old was a heffalump, she was in her sling regularly until 18 m then occassionally until she was 3. The slings are designed to evenly distribute weight, and when you're using them regularly it just becomes second nature. I definitely couldn't have carried around my 6 month to three year old in my arms for long periods, but had no problem with the sling.

See we're the opposite, I find it really hard going with Amelie in the sling but can carry her for ages Weird!





+ I agree with the bonding comment.. my LO loves her daddy and he's never fed her or put her to bed. He does bath time with her everynight and gets up with her on a Saturday morning so I can have a longlie. He obv plays with her throughout the day too but those are his main 'alone' times with her

 

[Gwizz]

Im a mixture.. with Ben I wanted a hospital birth but I also wanted a water one too, however due to when my water broke etc I couldn't have that. Home birth scared me with my first baby because I wanted to be near a medical facility just in case summot was wrong with baby. I would consider it for my second but tbh will probably do the hospital again just for reassurance and help with the whole process.

As for BF, I did that successfully for 7 months and 2 days!, this was what I wanted to do although I wasn't hung up on doing it for years as for me it would have felt wierd attaching a toddler to my chest. I only stopped as ben needed more and I was exhausted, plus I was returning to work.

I went through the research of cloth nappies and do your own wipes but to me it seemed easier with disposables - touch wood I have only had 1 incident of nappy rash which lasted 4 days. I also think the manufacturing process of producing the new disposable nappies doesn't differ that much with the carbon outlay that producing disposables does, but obviously they take centuries to decay

I could not get on with the sling, it felt like I was breaking my back

xx

 

[Aidan's Mummy]

Next time I want a water birth but in a hospital

I will be using cloth nappies

I already used a sling with aidan but lie blahh said afetr a while they get soooo heavy

As for breastfeeding I tried it and found it really hard and the support I had was shit

But I will be trying again next time

But even though I didnt breastfeed me and aidan have one amazing bond. He is like my little shadow
xx

 

[lozzy21]

I just wonder what my OH says about reusables

 

[trumpetbum]

Also, I do semi-cosleeping til 6 months then its into cot and own room but think me and OH will get a bigger bed for the next LO cos doubles arent big enough haha.

I didn't do home birth for my 1st cos I didnt know how my body would cope with pain of labour but I managed well on gas and air and a shot of diamorphine to help me sleep but I think I could manage without it and hopefully I wont have a back2back labour with my next baby. I'm going to do hypnobirthing too with my next labour


p.s. Its great you're all for slings but omg you have no idea how heavy a 6 month old baby is

My 6 month old was a heffalump, she was in her sling regularly until 18 m then occassionally until she was 3. The slings are designed to evenly distribute weight, and when you're using them regularly it just becomes second nature. I definitely couldn't have carried around my 6 month to three year old in my arms for long periods, but had no problem with the sling.

See we're the opposite, I find it really hard going with Amelie in the sling but can carry her for ages Weird!





+ I agree with the bonding comment.. my LO loves her daddy and he's never fed her or put her to bed. He does bath time with her everynight and gets up with her on a Saturday morning so I can have a longlie. He obv plays with her throughout the day too but those are his main 'alone' times with her

Maybe the style of sling? Ita, there are so many special bonding moments to be had.

 

[Booga]

I would like to give birth in a hospital, though I would like for the majority of my parenting to be "natural". I.e. cloth diapers, carrying baby in a sling, breastfeeding, etc. Baby bottles and disposable diapers often have chemicals in them that are bad for baby, and bad for the environment, and the containers that baby formula comes in are no better. Besides, I think the bonding experience is much more powerful with breastfeeding and slings!

 

[runnergrl]

Personally, I want to give birth naturally but not at home or in a conventional hospital. I want to have my baby at a birthing center with a trained, licensed midwife who will have been with me throughout my pregnancy and knows what to expect. not just some doctor who happens to be on his shift when I go into labor. ( I know thats not how it always works, but I have heard horror stories)
I would love to use cloth diapers as my sister did this with her LO and had a service that picked up the dirty ones and delivered clean ones each week. It was expensive, but probably no more so than disposable ones. Of course I will probably have some disposables around when traveling and from friends and showers and such.

I am definitely Breastfeeding as long as I can and would Love to use a sling.. want to go more into detail, but have to run. the school bell just rang!

 

[mummy3]

Im wtt for my fourth, due to no af and im yet to get the birth and first few months I imagined before I had my kids. With my first it was just the done thing to go to hospital so I did bad bad time with forceps and seizures, so safest place but not what I wanted.
With my second I was high risk so had to go to hosp, but had done some research this time and wanted a homebirth, was doing ok till 34 weeks with my bp so could have happened then preterm labour at 35 weeks actual birth was fast and natural tho and absolutely amazing.
My third was planned c section for placenta praevia, never ever again!

Now when I started out I had no idea what was involved in having a baby, so I went out to get supplies and picked up bottles, my mum looked at me and asked what I needed them for as I was adamant I was breastfeeding, and for the life of me I dont know why I picked them up, all I said was "dont babies need bottles"

I tried old fashioned terry nappies but they were a disaster, still trying to decide on alternatives. Dont know what BLW involves but 3 times in I know what they want when they want it!

I know im waffling,my littlest has a cold and ive been up all night! only meant to say I want to try a homebirth and that I love breastfeeding my kids,

 

[plutosblue]

I would love to have a homebirth.. however I think I will end up in the hospital incase of complications or something.. the whole idea of being home and something happens terrifies me!

I will be using cloth nappies with those little disposable sheets inside, since its better for the environment. I also would like to use a sling, since its a nice easy way to keep tabs on baby and keep house!

As for teething necklaces I don't think I will bother, it will be a dummy and some bongela for me! Haha

I would prefer to breastfeed if I can, although I am not against bottle feeding at all I just like the conveniency of breast feeding, babies crying you just whip out the boob, but bottles need sterilising etc and I don't have the patience.

Overall I would like to care for the environment but I'm all about convenience!

 

[L005]

I will definately be giving birth in a hospital (whenever that day comes) but I think it is due to the fact that I am a labour and delivery nurse and I have seen everything that could go wrong...even though the true emergencies are not common.
I also really want to breastfeed. It is so beneficial to both mom and baby!