Home Birthers & Hopefuls!

[nikki-lou25]

CG - that is amazing how your hubby has transformed. My hubby did the same, as it happens he didnt cut the cord but he was there and that for me was a MASSIVE deal. I bet you're bursting with pride and excitement! Is it May yet? I can't wait to hear how it all goes with the birth!

 

[gina8177]

Congratulations ER!!!! She is beautiful!

I can't believe how much has happened while I was on vacation.

 

[Cactusgirl]

CG - that is amazing how your hubby has transformed. My hubby did the same, as it happens he didnt cut the cord but he was there and that for me was a MASSIVE deal. I bet you're bursting with pride and excitement! Is it May yet? I can't wait to hear how it all goes with the birth!

Not long now!! He surprised me again this morning and asked about catching the baby?! I am sure he has had a personality transplant!!

AND HE was telling ME to ensure I put it in the birth plan!! This time last week he would not have known what a birth plan was even though I had tried telling him!

 

[urbanbumpkin]

That is great, Cactusgirl!

My husband has been writing the start of our birth plan (I'm going to add to it today). He is reading Ina May's Guide to Breastfeeding at the moment, so was saying last night that we should definitely add a bit about quiet skin-to-skin time after the birth, and allowing the baby to try and find its own way to the breast. Our midwives tend to encourage this anyway, but I still think it is worth putting in.

He has decided we are going shopping for some waterproof sheets tomorrow so that we can have them over the sofa (which is next to where the pool will be) and then I can just flop on there for as long as needed/wanted after I get out of the pool.

I was going to add a bit about that myself, but it is great that we are both coming to the same conclusions independently about stuff like that.

The one thing we are still dithering about is the Vitamin K.

 

[Janidog]

Its lovely to hear so many partners being so supportive, mine is pretty supportive and feels he will bond more when LO is born, rather then being sent away from the hospital soon after the birth

 

[carries]

Huge huge congrats ER I am so pleased for you...Abigail is beautiful x

Janiepops I can believe you didnt smack that horrid midwife. Hamming up is one thing but out and out lies is just outrageous!

Cactus girl I am so pleased your hubby has come around and in what sounds like such a dramatic way! My Oh wants to catch baby this time (oscar came out to fast so he didnt have time!) but still cant bring himself to cut the cord which is fine. Its not a squeamish thing, he just doesnt want to be the one to sever the bond if that make sense.

Well, I havent been online in the last few days as my little boy has finally decided to start walking! Yay! All the running around really isnt helping my SPD but its worth it.

Rach I know MM has offered but I dont mind being a second in command for a text buddy if you like. I could do with someone to text as well actually if anyone is free?

 

[Mervs Mum]

pm me your number carries!

 

[becstar]

Hi ladies! I've been reading your stories with a mixture of joy and deep envy! I really wanted a home birth with Ilana but it didn't happen... I am blessed to have a healthy happy daughter so i feel selfish for being envious of home birthers but I am.

Well, I'm starting to think about no 2 and reading this I have hugely mixed feelings. I hope you don't mind of I post here about them? Not sure where else to put them!

I was booked for a home birth with Ilana but in the end she was 16 days late and I was induced. It wasn't traumatic in terms of the actual delivery but it was very very sudden (went from not feeling contractions to them being a minute long and 45 seconds apart, so no respite). I panicked (my mum had to leave because she was going to Australia - booked it thinking the baby would be out weeks before! and my calm sister couldn't get out of work so I had no calm female support). I ended up asking for an epidural. I had it but it didn't work, and they took my G+A away for pushing, so I actually did the birth with no pain relief... but I vividly remember the feeling of utter shock and panic and fear. I have a high pain threshold but oh my god, it was like nothing else. I know that inductions can be more painful than 'normal' birth.

I did manage to get into a bath during my labour as the hospital had wireless monitoring pads, and the water was lovely... but it was too cramped in the bath and the pool was in use so I had to get out. That was when I panicked and asked for the epidural.

I have a La Bassine pool and pump etc under the bed all ready... I want to have a home birth next time, but I am panicking in case I can't handle it. I know I'd much rather be at home, I HATE hospitals (the after'care' and pre-labour part were an absolute joke and I'd go a long way to avoid that again) and I really really want to do it. The hospital is only down the road from me (literally, you can see it from outside my house) so it's not far...

Part of the issue is that since watching One Born Every Minute, husband now thinks i should be in hospital in case anything goes wrong... my feeling is that being blue lighted in won't take much longer than wheeling me round the wards but he keeps saying 'every second counts' etc and then i feel selfish. He was very up for it before Ilana was born.

Anyone got any words of wisdom? Reassurance?

Thanks ladies.

 

[Rachiebaby24]

Huge huge congrats ER I am so pleased for you...Abigail is beautiful x

Janiepops I can believe you didnt smack that horrid midwife. Hamming up is one thing but out and out lies is just outrageous!

Cactus girl I am so pleased your hubby has come around and in what sounds like such a dramatic way! My Oh wants to catch baby this time (oscar came out to fast so he didnt have time!) but still cant bring himself to cut the cord which is fine. Its not a squeamish thing, he just doesnt want to be the one to sever the bond if that make sense.

Well, I havent been online in the last few days as my little boy has finally decided to start walking! Yay! All the running around really isnt helping my SPD but its worth it.

Rach I know MM has offered but I dont mind being a second in command for a text buddy if you like. I could do with someone to text as well actually if anyone is free?

definately......will Pm you my number.....and you can moan to me all you lik about spd!! Well Done to your LO too!!!

 

[Rachiebaby24]

ah thats great news CG....my OH is not so willing to catch the baby but he said he will see how he feels....

Well girls.....baby still here......been losing lots of plug but no blood or anything.....LOTS of contractions but nothing massively strong or regular.....just a notch more than Braxton Hicks!! Cant believe she is still in there!! Maley was 10 days early....she couldnt wait to get out!! ha ha

 

[Bournefree]

Hey girls, hope you're all doing well today!!!

I've been lurking on here again, waiting til I got to see my MW to make our plans yesterday.....and what a bloody crap meeting it was! She was the head of the team at my local surgery, and she basically did everything to make sure we knew she wasn't happy with us having our home birth!

She firstly greeted us by saying it was very late for us to be deciding this, 'these things take months to organise' and that she was gonna have to work extra, and draw in resources from other areas, so she could have it planned in time. Then she said, oh well there's another woman due the day before you, and she's been booked in from the start, so we can't be on call for you both, if you go into labour on the 28th (the day before) you WILL be going to hospital......at this point I just sat and nodded, was aware of how things were going to pan out...she went out the room to get the diary and I said to Chris I think we're gonna have a fight on our hands here.

So she came back with her diary and list of things to tell me, asked why I wanted to deliver at home etc etc, and seemed to be quite happy with everything I was saying. Told us about pain relief, how I can have diamorphine, which I declined, so she then told me that I would not be able to change my mind in labour, if things got too much for me, I wouldn't be able to go to hospital.....I don't want to go, but I KNOW that this IS an option, they won't bloody refuse me! Then came the list of everything that can go wrong - Chris's face got whiter by the minute - I sat nodding my head, I've done my homework and know the risks. And if something happened, it would be 1-2 hours before they got me to hospital...WTF, it only takes 20 minutes by car, surely a blue light ambulance wouldn't take 1-2 hours?! I said this, and she just kept saying about the number of women who had said to her 'I wish I'd known this before I chose my home birth and it went bad'. So basically she's saying that she has a list of women who's births had gone wrong? I must admit, I felt quite sick at this point.

Next was the pool...I said that I would be labouring in the pool all being well. Her reply to this - well that's Chris's job to maintain the temperature, he wont be able to help you much as this is his most important role, she was almost shouting at him!!!! Again, I just sat nodding, while squeezing his hand, if I opened my mouth I was going to say something I regretted. And how it HAD to be a rigid-side pool, not an inflatable one.....I didn't tell her this is what we're getting, what they gonna do at the time, tell me to get out? I don't bloody think so!

So this was the basis of the whole meeting, not ONCE did she say anything positive about the whole thing, and I know they have to cover everything, and was expecting to hear all the cons, but she did nothing to boost our confidence about it. Chris is a natural worrier, and I've spent a while explaining things to him so that he's happy with how it'll be here, and in less than an hour she brought him back to square one. She actually asked if he was sure he wanted to sign the form! I could've smacked her.

But we signed, and she made a fuss again about having to organise things in 3 weeks. Had I been a weaker person, I would've told her to forget it, but I stuck to my guns and being the stubborn creature I am, it's made me even more determined. I'm seeing my usual MW next week and I'll be bringing it up, I don't want to be going into this feeling negative!

Sorry I'm rambling on a lot, it probably doesn't seem such a big deal after all, I would just like to feel my team of midwives are behind us 100%!

Sorry I haven't catch up all, since being away.. so I'm just reading through what I've missed.

I just can't not comment on this - What a load of cr*p!!! Sorry excuse my language!
Damn right you should tell your MW about this. I would be taking in a copy of what you have written here, so you really can convay what lies this women has told you!!
I know they have to tell you all the risks, but as a homebirther you are very prepaired for all the risks; everybody does there reseach. I just wonder why they don't sit women down who are going to go into hosptial and tell them all the risks>? As statistically the risks are higher in hospital for all complications!!!??
What you have experianced is just crazy! I don't know if you have updated.. so I'll continue reading on - but I ALSO would be sorely tempted to write or call the head of community MWs about this as it is bonkers!
Good for you for staying strong!

P.S it isn't your OH job to keep the temperature of the pool within a certain range - It isn't a big job anyway.. I only had my water topped up once and the MWs kept an eye on it. His only "Job" is to support you.
xxx

 

[LolaAnn]

Oh JaniePops

Good on you for sticking to your guns and not getting down by their scare tactics.
I have my 36w MW appointment today and its going to be about the home birth, well it better because she has flat out refused to talk to me about it until now. So I'm a little nervous.

I've been getting kind of weak period pain type stuff in my back on and off since yesterday at nights too - what is this? Are these BH or what?

 

[urbanbumpkin]

Hope it goes well, Lola!

I think we are due the same day. I've been having some period pain type pains at night too, but low down at the front, I think it is everything stretching out.

A package arrived this morning - some swim floats! I got two long ones that look like pipe lagging called noodles (long bendy polystyrene cylinders) and two more normal flat ones. Hopefully they will help me get extra comfy in the pool. But it means my wardrobe is now full of giant bits of foam!

Afterwards they should be useful for when we get the baby swimming, which I'd like to do as soon as possible. I'm rubbish at swimming myself.

Hope everyone is well.

 

[wannabubba#4]

Hi Ladies

Well -I spoke to my mw about homebirthing today and she was great -she did mention that as there are only 2 mw's on call for home confinements, that in the unlikely event that another baby was being delivered the same night / day then I would need to go in; but also said what was the chances of that happening lol -she already has one other baby due that week. I so hope not lol!! Or hope I get in there first haha
She has now passed over my notes to the home birhting team , who she said will contact me in the next few weeks to discuss things more (by which time we should have todays GTT and routine blood results too) so YAY!!!!


I can't beleive how easy it all was ,and how (ridiculous I know ) nervous I felt about mentioning it lol. She kind of questioned me why, seemed happy with my replies, checked over my history etc and said yep ,looks like it should be no problem at all. The only other consideration was my spd, but she seemed happy that I knew I didn't want an epi or pethidine and would be more comfortable not dragging my contracting, sore pelvis, fat arse all the way to hopsital when I could have G&A and a birthing pool in the comfort of my own home. Yay!!!

So excited now- even with 3 months still to go lol

xxxx

 

[gina8177]

Hi ladies! I've been reading your stories with a mixture of joy and deep envy! I really wanted a home birth with Ilana but it didn't happen... I am blessed to have a healthy happy daughter so i feel selfish for being envious of home birthers but I am.

Well, I'm starting to think about no 2 and reading this I have hugely mixed feelings. I hope you don't mind of I post here about them? Not sure where else to put them!

I was booked for a home birth with Ilana but in the end she was 16 days late and I was induced. It wasn't traumatic in terms of the actual delivery but it was very very sudden (went from not feeling contractions to them being a minute long and 45 seconds apart, so no respite). I panicked (my mum had to leave because she was going to Australia - booked it thinking the baby would be out weeks before! and my calm sister couldn't get out of work so I had no calm female support). I ended up asking for an epidural. I had it but it didn't work, and they took my G+A away for pushing, so I actually did the birth with no pain relief... but I vividly remember the feeling of utter shock and panic and fear. I have a high pain threshold but oh my god, it was like nothing else. I know that inductions can be more painful than 'normal' birth.

I did manage to get into a bath during my labour as the hospital had wireless monitoring pads, and the water was lovely... but it was too cramped in the bath and the pool was in use so I had to get out. That was when I panicked and asked for the epidural.

I have a La Bassine pool and pump etc under the bed all ready... I want to have a home birth next time, but I am panicking in case I can't handle it. I know I'd much rather be at home, I HATE hospitals (the after'care' and pre-labour part were an absolute joke and I'd go a long way to avoid that again) and I really really want to do it. The hospital is only down the road from me (literally, you can see it from outside my house) so it's not far...

Part of the issue is that since watching One Born Every Minute, husband now thinks i should be in hospital in case anything goes wrong... my feeling is that being blue lighted in won't take much longer than wheeling me round the wards but he keeps saying 'every second counts' etc and then i feel selfish. He was very up for it before Ilana was born.

Anyone got any words of wisdom? Reassurance?

Thanks ladies.

Hi Becstar! I probably don't have any words of wisdom as we are expecting our first. One thing that I recommend is to stop watching birthing programs since they tend to always show births that undermind our confidence in the natural process of birth. This is something that is stressed as super important in my hypnobabies class as it tends to only do us harm by planting seeds of doubt and such in our minds. Instead I would try going to different sites that promote natural birth and watching those birthing clips/videos.

If you are needing reassurance and empowerment I really, really recommend Ina May's Guide to Childbirth, her book helped me overcome my fears associated with home birth and the knowledge/empowerment that I gained helped my DH overcome his fears as well.

 

[trumpetbum]

Just popping my head in again. Well done ER.

 

[becstar]

Hi ladies! I've been reading your stories with a mixture of joy and deep envy! I really wanted a home birth with Ilana but it didn't happen... I am blessed to have a healthy happy daughter so i feel selfish for being envious of home birthers but I am.

Well, I'm starting to think about no 2 and reading this I have hugely mixed feelings. I hope you don't mind of I post here about them? Not sure where else to put them!

I was booked for a home birth with Ilana but in the end she was 16 days late and I was induced. It wasn't traumatic in terms of the actual delivery but it was very very sudden (went from not feeling contractions to them being a minute long and 45 seconds apart, so no respite). I panicked (my mum had to leave because she was going to Australia - booked it thinking the baby would be out weeks before! and my calm sister couldn't get out of work so I had no calm female support). I ended up asking for an epidural. I had it but it didn't work, and they took my G+A away for pushing, so I actually did the birth with no pain relief... but I vividly remember the feeling of utter shock and panic and fear. I have a high pain threshold but oh my god, it was like nothing else. I know that inductions can be more painful than 'normal' birth.

I did manage to get into a bath during my labour as the hospital had wireless monitoring pads, and the water was lovely... but it was too cramped in the bath and the pool was in use so I had to get out. That was when I panicked and asked for the epidural.

I have a La Bassine pool and pump etc under the bed all ready... I want to have a home birth next time, but I am panicking in case I can't handle it. I know I'd much rather be at home, I HATE hospitals (the after'care' and pre-labour part were an absolute joke and I'd go a long way to avoid that again) and I really really want to do it. The hospital is only down the road from me (literally, you can see it from outside my house) so it's not far...

Part of the issue is that since watching One Born Every Minute, husband now thinks i should be in hospital in case anything goes wrong... my feeling is that being blue lighted in won't take much longer than wheeling me round the wards but he keeps saying 'every second counts' etc and then i feel selfish. He was very up for it before Ilana was born.

Anyone got any words of wisdom? Reassurance?

Thanks ladies.

Hi Becstar! I probably don't have any words of wisdom as we are expecting our first. One thing that I recommend is to stop watching birthing programs since they tend to always show births that undermind our confidence in the natural process of birth. This is something that is stressed as super important in my hypnobabies class as it tends to only do us harm by planting seeds of doubt and such in our minds. Instead I would try going to different sites that promote natural birth and watching those birthing clips/videos.

If you are needing reassurance and empowerment I really, really recommend Ina May's Guide to Childbirth, her book helped me overcome my fears associated with home birth and the knowledge/empowerment that I gained helped my DH overcome his fears as well.

How funny, they have books for sale at our GPs surgery and I was reading this there earlier! Thanks for the advice.

 

[LolaAnn]

urbanbumpkin I think we must be due the same day! yay! home birth bump buddies!!

It went so well!! She just did all my checks and stuff and I said - so.. what about the home birth.. and she was like, huh? I'm like - you told me not to mention it until 36w! Here I am, 36w And she's like, uhhh ok, well I'll come round next wednesday and drop off the homebirth pack. I had to ask her all the questions, who will be at the birth etc, what pain relief can I have but it all went well and there was no talk of no midwifes being able to attend or anything like that so all good, as long as baby doesn't make his appearance before next wednesday home birth plans are all go!! Yay!!

 

[deej23]

Hello Girls Well things wern't exactly to plan but it's all over with now.
I can only put down what I remember, which I will also explain.
Well I woke up at 4 am on Tuesday morning..... In pain. I had fairly strong contractions at 8 mins apart and was losing my plug in bits and bobs.

At 7am they were still the same but kept missing the odd one and wern't getting any stronger????? As my hubby is now working 70 miles away he stayed home. I kept mobile and then things started to go pear shaped

By lunch time they had stopped apart from evey now and again I got a huge strong one
I phoned my midwife who came out to see me to find I was already 5cm but Nyah was still laying with her side down my left side so her head was 90 degrees the wrong way

The midwife said as soon as she turned which she was trying to do things would go really quick. We decided to get out the pool and all went along ok my contractions returned to 5 mins apart and this is where I get hazy

I remember getting out of the pool to be checked over and I did'nt get back in.. Now the fill in part from hubby and nurses etc
I had Nyah at 11.44 pm weighing in at 7lb 11oz just one ounce more than our son Luca

All done with no pain relief at all.... Here's where the fun starts. The placenta would not deliver as it was well and truly attatched inside... so much so that pulling on the cord only served to pull the cord off, leaving the whole placenta inside me

This is the point where the midwife called 999
Apparently I totaly flipped and lost it as my hospital phobia kicked straight in and I turned from Jeckyll to Hyde
My poor DH and two midwifes and 2 ambulance men (who when they came to the door DH said it looked like I'd seen the grim reeper.) All tried to get me to go. I made a huge fool of myself insisting on a particular pair of flipflops and saying one of the midwifes had hidden my bag

When I got to the hospital, they decided to take me straight to theatre for a quite big serious op The plan was to give me and epidural (hang on just ahd a child with no pain relief and now I get an epidural still can't get my head around things. They took me into theatre in hysterics poor DH stayed in a side room with LO listening to me screaming all the way down the corridoor

The nurse told my they had 5 attempts at putting in the epidural
But after a no go with this and my going compleatly off my head they more or less held me down and put me under a general, full works tube down the throat the lot. From the point above I mentioned being at home and getting out of the pool the next thing I remember is the next bit..... Opening my eyes to see DH then looking up and seeing the celling and realizing I was in hospital I was in total shock
I didn't even know I had had Nyah and all I could think was they had rushed me in for an emergency c section. One of the first things I asked hubby. He filled me in on most of what had happened which I couldn't really take in coming round from a general and being in complete shock.

I won't bore you with any more of the long details, But I got out of the hospital at 8.30am this morining after more or less twisting the nurses arm for my antibiotics and declining to see doctors etc. I have no post having a baby things like no tears or cuts or anything but I DO have a raging sore throat that keeps sticking together and back ache worse than back ache labour!! that looks like a pin cusion with huge bruises, with little electric shock type pulses shooting up my spine each time i move anything BUT I am at home with my wonderfull amazingly understanding hubby (HE DESERVES A MEDAL) our DS who is over the moon to be a big brother and Nyah our final piece AND I MEAN FINAL piece of our family. Who by the way is breastfeeding really well bless her.

Good luck to all of you who have your babies yet to come I hope all your birth plans and wishes come true and thank you in advance for any posts as I may not be on for a while as I'm still in minor shock and need to sort out my head and back.

Here's a few pics of our beautiful bundle of joy!!

https://img714.imageshack.us/img714/7376/dscf0111f.th.jpg

https://img685.imageshack.us/img685/475/imag0126w.th.jpg

https://img684.imageshack.us/img684/601/dscf0107b.th.jpg

 

[madasa]

I'm so sorry it went pear shaped at the end. What a shame you can't remember the actual birth.... But (and here is a BIG but) you achieved something awesome, you birthed your beautiful baby in the comfort of your home, as you wanted to, and she had no meds in the process. You got a lot of stuff your way and it's all credit to you that she is feeding sowell and thriving now, despite your difficulties. Congrats on your new arrival, she is gorgeous