Home Birthers & Hopefuls!

[MandaAnda]

Oh, Rach that's a shame. I'm really sorry to hear that. Are they thinking it's pre-eclampsia or just high BP? I'm just asking, as it is normal for BP to go up in later pregnancy.

Also, were you stressed at the time of it being taken? If you were moving the arm it was being taken on, that can have an impact (even talking can - I always try to be very still and quiet). Were they using the right sized cuff? Do you know anyone who has a BP cuff so that you could take it in a relaxed environment? Or maybe next time you have an appointment, ask for it to be taken again at the end of the appointment when you are relaxed, etc.?

 

[Celesse]

I was told that there are 2 different drugs that can be used for a managed third stage. The one they use in hospital is milder and less likely to make you sick than the one used by the community midwives for home birth. Ofc this will differ from area to area, but if you are especially sickly it may be an idea to ask which they use.

I am having a "wait-and-see" third stage. Even if we opt for managed I have asked for a few minutes before the cord is clamped and injection given as opposed to straight at delivery of shoulders.

Rach, sorry to hear about your BP. Will you have to go in as soon as labour starts or will you be allowed to spend some time at home first? Or have they recommended induction?

 

[Rach28]

Oh, Rach that's a shame. I'm really sorry to hear that. Are they thinking it's pre-eclampsia or just high BP? I'm just asking, as it is normal for BP to go up in later pregnancy.

Also, were you stressed at the time of it being taken? If you were moving the arm it was being taken on, that can have an impact (even talking can - I always try to be very still and quiet). Were they using the right sized cuff? Do you know anyone who has a BP cuff so that you could take it in a relaxed environment? Or maybe next time you have an appointment, ask for it to be taken again at the end of the appointment when you are relaxed, etc.?

As things currently stand they think its just high BP as I have no other symptoms, urine remains normal and all blood tests were normal too.

The midwife at the hospital was very anti homebirth, the Dr's I saw said it was a no-no but thought id chat about it with the community team yesterday as they are very pro homebirth and very supportive.

Sadly though the MW said they wouldnt take the risk with my health i.e. heart attacks etc and could not risk their registrations as MW's if anything happened... if I am allowed to go into labour naturally at home, the MW team will visit and assess me at first but will then send me to hospital.

I always try and remain relaxed etc for BP - the 170/120 reading was after the MW got me to lay down for abit and chill out!!!

I have no idea about the cuff thing??

The MW at the hospital tried to tie a rubber glove around my arm to take bloods (as they lost the first lot..) it snapped and pinged me in the face!

 

[MandaAnda]

I have no idea about the cuff thing??

The MW at the hospital tried to tie a rubber glove around my arm to take bloods (as they lost the first lot..) it snapped and pinged me in the face!

It's entirely your decision obviously, but if it were me, I'd be trying to get an agreement in place - like, if your BP goes back down and remains reasonable, can your HB be back on track. And, yes, if the wrong size cuff is used, the results will be wrong.

And I hate it when people try to use a rubber glove. It's not like the NHS can't afford proper tourniquets!

 

[nightkd]

Sorry to butt in all of a sudden...I was planning a homebirth, then decided to find a hospital - but lo and behold the only hospital that sounds flexible enough to allow the mother to birth as she wishes, has policies in place that won't allow me to have a waterbirth... So I'm back to planning a homebirth now and I was just wondering something -

Are you writing birth plans? If so, are you going to write a birth plan INCASE you end up going to hospital? I was thinking about this, I'm going to have a look for homebirthing birth-plans because I have a few requests I just want to get down on paper for the midwife to see (eg waiting until the cord stops pulsing to cut it) but I suddenly thought, I'm packing a hospital bag just incase, should I be adding a section to my birth plan incase we end up in hospital! Anyone else doing this?

xx

 

[Pops]

Sorry to hear that Rach. I agree with Manda about trying to get an agreement in place

We have had some developments today with regards to our Maternity Care. I called our hospital to see if we could change appointments as the one they have given me clashes with one of Boyos shifts (he is a Police Officer so not like you can just leave for an hour). Anyway, once again, I was spoken to like a piece of rubbish and made to feel like a small child who was scolded for being naughty.

Boyo called me to find out what had happened and I was really upset so he said we would go private for our 20 week scan which is great but we shouldn't have to.

So, we made some phonecalls and enquiries this afternoon and are now speaking to the Community Midwife tomorrow (she was "too busy to discuss" today) and are asking to change hospitals to another, slightly further away but which mentions home births on their website and also has a Home From Home unit.

We have valid reasons to request it and I know our GP will support us so hopefully this will be the start of our maternity care coming up to scratch. I don't expect it to be suddenly the same level as private but I can't see how it can be any worse.

I will let you know how it goes

Hope you are all well xxx

 

[EternalRose]

Oh, Rach that's a shame. I'm really sorry to hear that. Are they thinking it's pre-eclampsia or just high BP? I'm just asking, as it is normal for BP to go up in later pregnancy.

Also, were you stressed at the time of it being taken? If you were moving the arm it was being taken on, that can have an impact (even talking can - I always try to be very still and quiet). Were they using the right sized cuff? Do you know anyone who has a BP cuff so that you could take it in a relaxed environment? Or maybe next time you have an appointment, ask for it to be taken again at the end of the appointment when you are relaxed, etc.?

As things currently stand they think its just high BP as I have no other symptoms, urine remains normal and all blood tests were normal too.

The midwife at the hospital was very anti homebirth, the Dr's I saw said it was a no-no but thought id chat about it with the community team yesterday as they are very pro homebirth and very supportive.

Sadly though the MW said they wouldnt take the risk with my health i.e. heart attacks etc and could not risk their registrations as MW's if anything happened... if I am allowed to go into labour naturally at home, the MW team will visit and assess me at first but will then send me to hospital.

I always try and remain relaxed etc for BP - the 170/120 reading was after the MW got me to lay down for abit and chill out!!!

I have no idea about the cuff thing??

The MW at the hospital tried to tie a rubber glove around my arm to take bloods (as they lost the first lot..) it snapped and pinged me in the face!

I agree with Manda about the wrong size cuff as a student nurse before I have seen more dodgy readings than I have had hot dinners. I would also see if they can get some agreement in place as I heard that its common for BP to go up a bit in later stages of pregnancy as well . I dont really know why they said, they dont want to risk there registrations when ultimately the choice of where you give birth, is your choice and its there duty to attend you. They would more likely lose there registrations if they were to leave you to it I thought! If they have given you informed documented reasons as to why they dont think a homebirth should go ahead and you decide to have one, they would not get struck off for that! ( Please correct me if I am wrong anyone) But, I know you only want the best for you and your baby at the end of it, and thats all thats important really. If you still want your homebirth, I would probably bring up the possibility of having a bp monitor at home with you, as thats the best time to monitor your bp when your relaxed and calm and in your familiar surroundings, and I know they can sometimes loan them to you.

Nightkd - I have just wrote my homebirth plan And I have added a section in it called " in case of transfer to hospital ". I am not doing two birth plans one for home birth and one for hospital birth because that doesnt fit in with my positive mindset for a homebirth but you can express your wishes on your birthplan for any eventualities that may occur if you was to go into hospital.

Celesse - Happy due date for tomorrow, I am so excited for you

Lots of love ladies

EternalRose x x

 

[Celesse]

Are you writing birth plans? If so, are you going to write a birth plan INCASE you end up going to hospital? I was thinking about this, I'm going to have a look for homebirthing birth-plans because I have a few requests I just want to get down on paper for the midwife to see (eg waiting until the cord stops pulsing to cut it) but I suddenly thought, I'm packing a hospital bag just incase, should I be adding a section to my birth plan incase we end up in hospital! Anyone else doing this?

xx

I have a bullet point birth plan which does include my wishes in certain emergencies and transfer scenarios. For instance that if I have a section I want OH in with me and skin to skin ASAP.

I have an emergency bag packed for hospital, but it doesn't have that much in, just enough to get us through birth and on the ward.

 

[Celesse]

Celesse - Happy due date for tomorrow, I am so excited for you

Thank you!

The niggles I had yesterday seem to have gone away. Today we have gone for a very long walk but only a few BH. I've had some diarrhoea this evening which I'm hoping is a good sign. At least we have the growth scan to look forward to tomorrow if things don't get started.

My plan is to have the scan at the RVI at 11:30 then we are gonna go for a walk around the Quay Side. Gonna take a pic of baby on the Millenium bridge whilst she is still in my tummy. Then once she is arrives MIL wants to take her across from Newcastle to Gateshead via the Millenium bridge for the first time, so we can take another pic and have before and after shots. I think that a good distraction plan will be most important for my mental health on my due date!.

 

[EternalRose]

Celesse - Happy due date for tomorrow, I am so excited for you

Thank you!

The niggles I had yesterday seem to have gone away. Today we have gone for a very long walk but only a few BH. I've had some diarrhoea this evening which I'm hoping is a good sign. At least we have the growth scan to look forward to tomorrow if things don't get started.

My plan is to have the scan at the RVI at 11:30 then we are gonna go for a walk around the Quay Side. Gonna take a pic of baby on the Millenium bridge whilst she is still in my tummy. Then once she is arrives MIL wants to take her across from Newcastle to Gateshead via the Millenium bridge for the first time, so we can take another pic and have before and after shots. I think that a good distraction plan will be most important for my mental health on my due date!.

The bowel movement is a good sign, and it sounds like you have a perfect day planned for tomorrow. Why not have a curry? But your probably thinking one loose bowel movement is enough. I will be thinking of you tomorrow. x x x

 

[nightkd]

Thanks girls!! I'm just going to pack toiletries etc in my hospital bag and keep other things that we'll need at home too (eg clothes for LO) on top...that way it'll all be in one place to take things out as needed at home, or just to grab the whole thing to go to the hospital.

I was going to do as you said Eternal Rose - just put in a section with the basics - eg either me or DH staying with LO at all times...etc.

I am STILL being pressured by certain family members and friends to have a hospital birth, even though it would require me to destroy a huge section of my birth plan

xx

 

[EternalRose]

Thanks girls!! I'm just going to pack toiletries etc in my hospital bag and keep other things that we'll need at home too (eg clothes for LO) on top...that way it'll all be in one place to take things out as needed at home, or just to grab the whole thing to go to the hospital.

I was going to do as you said Eternal Rose - just put in a section with the basics - eg either me or DH staying with LO at all times...etc.

I am STILL being pressured by certain family members and friends to have a hospital birth, even though it would require me to destroy a huge section of my birth plan

xx

Dont tell anymore people, thats what I have decided to do. You would be surprised at how many people are ignorant ( unintentionally) about homebirths and will make you change your mind for no aparent reason at all. Its not like we have made the decision to have a homebirth whilst waiting in the queue at the fish and chip shop! Are you still in the UK or are you having your homebirth in the states? If I was in the states, I would be making a trip to see Ina May at the Farm x x

 

[nightkd]

Thanks girls!! I'm just going to pack toiletries etc in my hospital bag and keep other things that we'll need at home too (eg clothes for LO) on top...that way it'll all be in one place to take things out as needed at home, or just to grab the whole thing to go to the hospital.

I was going to do as you said Eternal Rose - just put in a section with the basics - eg either me or DH staying with LO at all times...etc.

I am STILL being pressured by certain family members and friends to have a hospital birth, even though it would require me to destroy a huge section of my birth plan

xx

Dont tell anymore people, thats what I have decided to do. You would be surprised at how many people are ignorant ( unintentionally) about homebirths and will make you change your mind for no aparent reason at all. Its not like we have made the decision to have a homebirth whilst waiting in the queue at the fish and chip shop! Are you still in the UK or are you having your homebirth in the states? If I was in the states, I would be making a trip to see Ina May at the Farm x x

Yeah. Thing is I'd quite like to be able to discuss it with people - eg my mum... I've got 2 nurses saying "I've seen so many sick moms, I would definitely recommend a hospital birth over a homebirth..." Urrr, sick in what way? Does being pregnant/giving birth make me sick?! My mum is saying that my Grandma and herself had complications during labour, making it sound like I'm doomed to complications too. Both of them were in a hospital (my mum got MRSA for goodness sake!) weren't waterbirthing and I'm sure had never heard of hypnobirthing... Just doesn't help when I'm trying to keep all fear out of thinking about the birth (which I'm actually looking forward to otherwise!)...

Exactly! I've done a lot of research and it's not like I'm just gonna get some random lady off the street to deliver our baby!!

I'll be giving birth in the US. Lol! I have no idea what that means Is that the lady that wrote the natural childbirth book?...I recognise the name...

(P.S Sorry if that came across as verging on a rant, it'd just be nice to have support from these people, instead of them just assuming that homebirth is unsafe... )

xx

 

[Mervs Mum]

Strap yourself in Nightkd because you'll find it even worse over there than over here!!

Have you watched 'The Business of Being Born' yet? The link is on the first page - I;d recommend it to you being in the US.

I had my birth plan from my last baby which was for the Birth Centre and so I have that in the event of transfer but TBH I wouldnt have wrote one otherwise. It's like the packing a bag thing too. I believe very much in PMA and the laws of attraction - 'Ask, Believe, Receive' If I need transferring my hubby knows where everything is and could grab stuff but TBH if I transfer it would only be in the event of a real dire emergency so I cant see me being too bothered about how many baby grows and pairs of knickers I have with me! I'll send him back later. BUT as I said I dont really even think like that because in my mind, it wont happen IYKWIM.....

 

[gina8177]

nightkd - I agree with ER, it is much simplier not to tell people you are planning a HB unless you know they are going to be supportive. The only person in my family who knows is my sister. My mom doesn't even know I'm using a MW because my dad told me she'd totally flip. I've heard way to many stories about family and friends making people feel terrible about their choice and accusing them of not caring for their baby, etc. My MIL also thinks we're seeing a dr and will flip when she finds out about the HB, she asked out right if we were planning one and we lied, she thinks you should stay in the hospital for at least a week to let the staff take care of baby while you "rest".

 

[EternalRose]

Nightkd - The general consensus with people who are not pro-home birth is that they always seem to have a horror story that seems to end like this" and if the mother wasnt at hospital, mum and baby would have died." The End. The majority of people never have any actual reasons to back up there claim that hospital birth is safer, and I am not really interested in changing peoples opinion as they are not going to give birth to my baby Thats why I said dont tell anyone, unless you know they are going to be supportive of you. Having a nice calm, natural labour is all about the mindset IMO. Ina May wrote the guide to childbirth, I love her! x

 

[Celesse]

My response to people who aren't supportive about home birth has been along the lines of "Research has shown that planned home birth for a normal pregnancy is at least as safe as hospital. If something isn't normal then we will go in". This line stopped everyone from saying anything else (at least to my face) with the exception of MIL. My MIL is second birth partner and was very worried about home birth but eventually came round after talking to the midwife at the birth planning appointment.

 

[nikki-lou25]

Nightkd - I hear you with the negative opinions on HB, people are all too willing to have a say in YOUR birth. I just used to tell people who clearly had no knowledge of homebirth that "I have done plenty of research and if you wish to have such a strong opinion then maybe you could do some reading on homebirth and then discuss it with me?" I felt like I had to justify myself at first but then I just told people that I knew what I was doing and that I wouldn't put my life or my babys life in danger.
GOOD LUCK with the homebirth

ER - So please to read that things are falling into place for your HB now

 

[Rach28]

[COLOR="Magenta
I agree with Manda about the wrong size cuff as a student nurse before I have seen more dodgy readings than I have had hot dinners. I would also see if they can get some agreement in place as I heard that its common for BP to go up a bit in later stages of pregnancy as well . I dont really know why they said, they dont want to risk there registrations when ultimately the choice of where you give birth, is your choice and its there duty to attend you. They would more likely lose there registrations if they were to leave you to it I thought! If they have given you informed documented reasons as to why they dont think a homebirth should go ahead and you decide to have one, they would not get struck off for that! ( Please correct me if I am wrong anyone) But, I know you only want the best for you and your baby at the end of it, and thats all thats important really. If you still want your homebirth, I would probably bring up the possibility of having a bp monitor at home with you, as thats the best time to monitor your bp when your relaxed and calm and in your familiar surroundings, and I know they can sometimes loan them to you.


EternalRose x x[/COLOR]

Thanks for this - its given me something to think about, it has almost seemed like it was a done deal now and I would be in hospital full stop.

I know when I see the consultant on thursday and they take my BP it will be high as I hate hospitals

 

[EternalRose]

[COLOR="Magenta
I agree with Manda about the wrong size cuff as a student nurse before I have seen more dodgy readings than I have had hot dinners. I would also see if they can get some agreement in place as I heard that its common for BP to go up a bit in later stages of pregnancy as well . I dont really know why they said, they dont want to risk there registrations when ultimately the choice of where you give birth, is your choice and its there duty to attend you. They would more likely lose there registrations if they were to leave you to it I thought! If they have given you informed documented reasons as to why they dont think a homebirth should go ahead and you decide to have one, they would not get struck off for that! ( Please correct me if I am wrong anyone) But, I know you only want the best for you and your baby at the end of it, and thats all thats important really. If you still want your homebirth, I would probably bring up the possibility of having a bp monitor at home with you, as thats the best time to monitor your bp when your relaxed and calm and in your familiar surroundings, and I know they can sometimes loan them to you.


EternalRose x x[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/QUOTE]

Thanks for this - its given me something to think about, it has almost seemed like it was a done deal now and I would be in hospital full stop.

I know when I see the consultant on thursday and they take my BP it will be high as I hate hospitals [/QUOTE]
[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]
Yeah its called white coat syndrome hun, and if you tell them you have that they may well offer to loan you a bp monitor for you to do yourself at home. It may be worthwhile mentioning it, you may not have to give up on your birth box just yet hun. Also, did they do urine was there any protein in it? Puffy hands? Ankles? Face? From your bp readings you posted here, I dont think they sounded extrememly high apart from the first one, considering your heavily pregnant. x x