Home schooling

[indy and lara]

Feeble, I was interested in finding out more and how flexible schooling would work. I think I is unfortunate that the discussion has to come down to you telling me not to kid myself. I haven't dismissed your standpoint but you have mine. I had a genuine interest but I don't need told that my colleagues and I are failing children. I can look around my school any day and see this is simply not the case.

Having taught in the State School sector for a lot of years I have very clear and up to date picture of what happens today. In Scotland class sizes are much smaller they were 30 years ago when I was at Primary for example.

Over and out for me. If I want to hear how I must be failing in my job and how the system I believe in and fight for is useless then I can read the Daily Mail.

 

[feeble]

I agree with you Mum22 - I absolutely do not blame the teachers at all. They are heros!

 

[Dragonfly]

I think respect starts at home.

 

[mum22ttc#3]

I think respect starts at home.

But unfortunately it seems in some homes it doesn't start and then is taken into schools where teachers are expected to deal with it. Obviously something is wrong somewhere, you only have to look at society in general to see that.

 

[feeble]

Feeble, I was interested in finding out more and how flexible schooling would work. I think I is unfortunate that the discussion has to come down to you telling me not to kid myself. I haven't dismissed your standpoint but you have mine. I had a genuine interest but I don't need told that my colleagues and I are failing children. I can look around my school any day and see this is simply not the case.

Having taught in the State School sector for a lot of years I have very clear and up to date picture of what happens today. In Scotland class sizes are much smaller they were 30 years ago when I was at Primary for example.

Over and out for me. If I want to hear how I must be failing in my job and how the system I believe in and fight for is useless then I can read the Daily Mail.

I am really sorry i have made you feel that way.

i disagree though, you have been incredibly negative from the start about 'allowing' a child to be flexi schooled and i would be very surprised if anything changed your mind about it...

regardless of that, i have not meant to offend you and i am sorry x

 

[feeble]

I think respect starts at home.

But unfortunately it seems in some homes it doesn't start and then is taken into schools where teachers are expected to deal with it. Obviously something is wrong somewhere, you only have to look at society in general to see that.

I think in our case, mum and dad both worked long long hours and hid themselves from any emotional attachment to us and expected the school to completely educate us about everything. Which of course is not what schools do... boarding schools do tend to teach more 'life' skills but your average comprehensive doesnt really...

I agree that many children enjoy and get on with school, but many children dont and many children also would find part-time schooling works well for them

its about finding your own balance and what works best for your own child (imho) rather than there being a one-size-fits-all rule.

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

I dont know. I am just going by what I have seen. I guess its disruptive to lessons and pupil they could argue. I know another post said about structure but my LO is on a rigid structure and he is in juniors. x

I dont really understand how a child receiving good one on one care could be disruptive? How about a child with learning disabilities that needs extra care during school hours but outside of the school?

The point of home schooling, Steiner schooling, flexi schooling and home education, is that it's getting away from this idea that children are robots who all behave in the same way and are okay with little one on one contact and support. When you have a child able to learn at their own pace, with help and support on hand, you find a much more comfortable, satisfied and calm child.

My child DOES have special needs and we have been fighting for a statement for nearly 3 years lol, I CANT just take him out whenever I like, I cant just say oh he is only going 3 days a week. Its just not been allowed. I know all kids are different thats why most schools have plans for all kids and nowadays more and more schools are having to adapt but that does not mean a school will allow a child to go "part time".

Do people not know how hard it is to get a statement?

Some part of me is annoyed that parents of perfectly able children will home school them, We have to fight to access what my son needs, I would love him to be able to stay mainstream his whole life but that wont happen. Sorry if that offends. Just how I feel right now. Of course everyone is free to do as they wish but I wish I had the option of my child being ok in mainstream without intervention.

 

[marley2580]

Personally, I'm not a fan of flexi-schooling either, as it's very reliant on getting both the school and the local authority on side. The majority of home edders that I know want to stay under the radar of the LA because they have a habit of making life hard for them.

 

[Dragonfly]

I think respect starts at home.

But unfortunately it seems in some homes it doesn't start and then is taken into schools where teachers are expected to deal with it. Obviously something is wrong somewhere, you only have to look at society in general to see that.

I do agree.

Both my parents worked long hours growing up but if we done anything wrong which we didnt it shamed the family. Everyone in town knew us, wasnt a big town. You dared to go on like an eejit or you would be talked about and my family would be disappointed so never done any wrong. You had to be respectful outside the house as you where inside the house. My brother later on in years went off the rails and we had to stop him as he could have gotten arrested for what he was at as if our family name appeared in the paper everyone knew who we where and would have brought shame. I think I was collared a few times for trying to stick up for others in school as I said before my mum had me even down as the trouble maker. You behaved outside the home, always respectful etc but at the same time didnt want to be rude and disrespectful so went without saying.

 

[sophxx]

If you wanted to take your lo out of school you could and no on Evan stop you as lo g as you can prove your are educating him at home lots of people remove there children full time or part time with out a statement I did part time schooling as I was training to be a ballet dancer so did my friend who was in the British team for gymnastics so it can be done we was allowed out on the gifted and talented scheme.
I know it's hard to get a statement and my bros gf family really struggled for her family but that doesn't mean that mums with children who dot have extra needs should feel bad they choose not to send there child to school just because other mums are struggling. When they to have the option to homeschool or flexible school if the wanted to. My child would be Fine at scho bit I don't want him to go to school and mix with the children who are rough and bullies I had a awful time at school cos of it and there's not much option round here if you choose a state school. I really hope you sort something for your lo soon that works for both of you x

I dont know. I am just going by what I have seen. I guess its disruptive to lessons and pupil they could argue. I know another post said about structure but my LO is on a rigid structure and he is in juniors. x

I dont really understand how a child receiving good one on one care could be disruptive? How about a child with learning disabilities that needs extra care during school hours but outside of the school?

The point of home schooling, Steiner schooling, flexi schooling and home education, is that it's getting away from this idea that children are robots who all behave in the same way and are okay with little one on one contact and support. When you have a child able to learn at their own pace, with help and support on hand, you find a much more comfortable, satisfied and calm child.

My child DOES have special needs and we have been fighting for a statement for nearly 3 years lol, I CANT just take him out whenever I like, I cant just say oh he is only going 3 days a week. Its just not been allowed. I know all kids are different thats why most schools have plans for all kids and nowadays more and more schools are having to adapt but that does not mean a school will allow a child to go "part time".

Do people not know how hard it is to get a statement?

Some part of me is annoyed that parents of perfectly able children will home school them, We have to fight to access what my son needs, I would love him to be able to stay mainstream his whole life but that wont happen. Sorry if that offends. Just how I feel right now. Of course everyone is free to do as they wish but I wish I had the option of my child being ok in mainstream without intervention.

 

[feeble]

I honestly cannot see how someone could be annoyed by the way another parent chooses to educate their child... Me choosing to homeschool or flexi school does not affect another parents decisions or issues

 

[dizz]

Sad that a thread that was supportive has turned into yet another teacher-bash fest (I'm with the other teacher posters feeling incredibly got at).

One of the reasons it took me so long to conceive was the damage that teaching, and running myself into the ground to get the best for other people's children, had done to my mental (and by association physical health). I absolutely destroyed myself trying my utmost to protect and educate a class of kids where we had 3-4 very disturbed and traumatised (and on occasion - just simply pushing their luck) individuals - not "bad" (or perhaps extreme's a better label there) enough to get any support - but who would smash up the classroom and assault other children and staff on a daily basis.... and I would spend my days trying to pre-empt triggers for kick offs, position myself in the firing line, repeatedly repair damage to the classroom - and then go home sobbing in the car when the pressure was off and psych myself up to do it all over again. I would lie awake at night working out how best I could protect the class when it all kicked off - if it kicked off in the hall - who would I send to whom as a runner to fetch help, where would I move the class to and via which route... if it kicked off in the classroom - what would I do then - who would help if X or Y was unavailable? Every single night this stuff ran through my brain... what could I do if I saw Johnny was bubbling up for an incident... how could I distract that? Where could I move Freddie to sit knowing full well he delighted in winding Johnny up so he'd get a reaction and could get his mum to come in shouting at me?

Eventually I snapped completely (after a day's teaching I'd actually been observed in with excellent feedback - for although I was falling apart, I did so in such a manner the kids weren't suffering!) and was signed off sick. I spent three long weeks lying in a darkened bedroom shaking, sobbing, wishing I was dead - before dragging myself back to school well before I was ready to see out the end of the term and keep some continuity for the kids... and I came back to a legion of parents complaining of my cheek of being off, and just barraging me with complaints about my time off work. That was the Road to Damascus revelation for me - that however much of myself I gave - it was never going to be enough, I was still just going to be the target of hatred and vitriol and the kicking boy for anyone having a bad day looking for their "servant" to have a go at.

Since the end of that term - I've never taught full-time again since, and won't again. I've been left with ongoing depression, so severe at times that I've come to the brink of suicide. I've been left with a stammer when I'm stressed and upset. I've been left with panic attacks, and an eating disorder which lead to such weight gain (I was a size 12 when I started teaching) as the only way to cope with life that it caused difficulty concieving, anxiety issues so severe I'm currently lying in bed at night crying with fear that I'll lose this pregnancy as well.... and generally in such a mess it took me 4 years to be able to get pregnant and 2 subsequent years to be able to carry one past the first trimester...

And yet still it's just "teachers are crap" "teachers don't care" "teachers are in it for the money and don't work hard enough"... I cared too much - to the point it almost killed me. So perhaps, when you're attacking the system (and I said from my first post that the system has failings - particularly in terms of behaviour issues), you might think and attack that SYSTEM - not the people caught up in the system who are just stuck implementing whatever Mr Gove's latest stupid idea he thought of in the shower this morning, while privately knowing it's twaddle but being unable to argue with it. Yes the system's flawed and fails some kids - it also succeeds a heck of a lot - many of whom only have the school as their stability in life, who have teachers bringing in clothes their own children are finished with to make sure that for once they're not wearing stuff ingrained with dirt and have a warm coat for playtime, who make sure that the kids coming in with no breakfast have something inside them (often from the teacher's own lunchbox), or that those sent for school trips without packed lunches (seen this one a few times) get fed via a whipround from all the staff's own personal dinners - there is a HELL of a lot of kindness, of funding things out of their own pocket, of putting their own families behind the kids they teach that goes on within education - but never enough - the bashing just continues.

Some of what's being posted is really unpleasant - thought I'd just lay on the line just how much some teachers DO care - and how utterly hurtful it is to read the constant bashing that's going on here.

 

[Dragonfly]

Wheres the bashing in this thread then? people here are gaining more info on home schooling, I may not do it but wanted to know more about it anyway. Unless you mean my time at school as teacher bashing in which case they deserved that. Sadly they where not good teachers like some are.

 

[indy and lara]

Feeble, I was interested in finding out more and how flexible schooling would work. I think I is unfortunate that the discussion has to come down to you telling me not to kid myself. I haven't dismissed your standpoint but you have mine. I had a genuine interest but I don't need told that my colleagues and I are failing children. I can look around my school any day and see this is simply not the case.

Having taught in the State School sector for a lot of years I have very clear and up to date picture of what happens today. In Scotland class sizes are much smaller they were 30 years ago when I was at Primary for example.

Over and out for me. If I want to hear how I must be failing in my job and how the system I believe in and fight for is useless then I can read the Daily Mail.

I am really sorry i have made you feel that way.

i disagree though, you have been incredibly negative from the start about 'allowing' a child to be flexi schooled and i would be very surprised if anything changed your mind about it...

regardless of that, i have not meant to offend you and i am sorry x

I am my own worst enemy. I cannot let things lie.

Feeble, I am not negative about flexible schooling but I cannot see how it would work successfully. That is why I was questioning you/ others about the practicalities. People can be negative about something/ dubious of its merits and change their mind when the other side is explained. Personally I don't think you can be in education and be unwilling to change your mind.

I am really unsure why people would choose this approach. I am still unclear what the benefits are. Most homeschoolers I have known have been confident that they are able to address the need for social interaction through clubs or meetings with others using the same approach and that their child is learning in a better environment. With this in mind I am not sure why someone would choose this approach? As I tried to explain, for me as a primary teacher I can see an awful lot of pitfalls such as the fact that my timetable is not set in stone meaning that there is no guarantee which areas of the curriculum will be accessed. I would think that aspect is easier in secondary school where timetables are followed.

 

[mum22ttc#3]

Unless I've been reading the thread wrong I haven't actually seen anyone say that it is a teachers fault or that they home school because of them. In fact if you read a few pages back myself and someone else said that it is nothing to do with that why we home school or are thinking about it. TBH I feel sorry for teachers.

The one major thing that is making us consider it at the moment is like you described above, other kids being disruptive, lashing out and just generally being nasty. I'm finding it hard to understand at the moment why I should send my daughter into school to be verbally and physically attacked by another kid in her class (she isn't the only one) when nothing is being done to stop it happening. I don't blame the teachers in the slightest, they are doing everything they can to help but it isn't enough to stop it.

I don't know what I think needs to be done but just looking at it says that obviously something does.

 

[indy and lara]

Wheres the bashing in this thread then? people here are gaining more info on home schooling, I may not do it but wanted to know more about it anyway. Unless you mean my time at school as teacher bashing in which case they deserved that. Sadly they where not good teachers like some are.

Comments like teachers expecting children to be robots is bashing Dragonfly. It suggests we all just sit there, with no concerns for the individual and not allowing for any deviation. Not everyone who does not succeed as school does so because of teachers or schools. Some of that is down to the individual and some of it is down to the child's parents too. I for one cannot imagine taking a hands free approach to Em's education but many people do.

 

[feeble]

Feeble, I was interested in finding out more and how flexible schooling would work. I think I is unfortunate that the discussion has to come down to you telling me not to kid myself. I haven't dismissed your standpoint but you have mine. I had a genuine interest but I don't need told that my colleagues and I are failing children. I can look around my school any day and see this is simply not the case.

Having taught in the State School sector for a lot of years I have very clear and up to date picture of what happens today. In Scotland class sizes are much smaller they were 30 years ago when I was at Primary for example.

Over and out for me. If I want to hear how I must be failing in my job and how the system I believe in and fight for is useless then I can read the Daily Mail.

I am really sorry i have made you feel that way.

i disagree though, you have been incredibly negative from the start about 'allowing' a child to be flexi schooled and i would be very surprised if anything changed your mind about it...

regardless of that, i have not meant to offend you and i am sorry x

I am my own worst enemy. I cannot let things lie.

Feeble, I am not negative about flexible schooling but I cannot see how it would work successfully. That is why I was questioning you/ others about the practicalities. People can be negative about something/ dubious of its merits and change their mind when the other side is explained. Personally I don't think you can be in education and be unwilling to change your mind.

I am really unsure why people would choose this approach. I am still unclear what the benefits are. Most homeschoolers I have known have been confident that they are able to address the need for social interaction through clubs or meetings with others using the same approach and that their child is learning in a better environment. With this in mind I am not sure why someone would choose this approach? As I tried to explain, for me as a primary teacher I can see an awful lot of pitfalls such as the fact that my timetable is not set in stone meaning that there is no guarantee which areas of the curriculum will be accessed. I would think that aspect is easier in secondary school where timetables are followed.

But you have been negative about flexi schooling, you have repeatedly expressed that it wouldn't work for you when all I am wondering about is how well it could work for a child!

I think taking the opportunity to homeschool is a massive thing, you are saying you will 100% be in control of a child's education which is daunting for many, whereas with flexi schooling you are still following the schools teaching guidance, you are just offering personalised, one on one care with your own child rather than having them constantly be part of massive classes where perhaps disruptive children get all the attention (and let's make no mistake, they need it) and the teachers are unsupported and though (and everyone on this thread has said this) doing their best but perhaps fighting a loosing battle at times.

It should always be what works best for the child, we should not hinder their development because a teacher does not wish to cooperate (which, I am sorry, is 100% the attitude I received from your posts) there are circumstances where a child is part-time in school and, in many cases, it's incredibly beneficial for the school and the child.

 

[Dragonfly]

Wheres the bashing in this thread then? people here are gaining more info on home schooling, I may not do it but wanted to know more about it anyway. Unless you mean my time at school as teacher bashing in which case they deserved that. Sadly they where not good teachers like some are.

Comments like teachers expecting children to be robots is bashing Dragonfly. It suggests we all just sit there, with no concerns for the individual and not allowing for any deviation. Not everyone who does not succeed as school does so because of teachers or schools. Some of that is down to the individual and some of it is down to the child's parents too. I for one cannot imagine taking a hands free approach to Em's education but many people do.

I didnt say that did I? I said we clock watched while teacher done something else we actually had nothing to do in class just where handed crosswords or told to do homework given in another class. I know all schools where not like where I was, my aunt works in the school I was in and isnt the same now a days. I wish I was home schooled but no one was there to school me. My kids wont be homes schooled though.

 

[indy and lara]

Feeble, I was interested in finding out more and how flexible schooling would work. I think I is unfortunate that the discussion has to come down to you telling me not to kid myself. I haven't dismissed your standpoint but you have mine. I had a genuine interest but I don't need told that my colleagues and I are failing children. I can look around my school any day and see this is simply not the case.

Having taught in the State School sector for a lot of years I have very clear and up to date picture of what happens today. In Scotland class sizes are much smaller they were 30 years ago when I was at Primary for example.

Over and out for me. If I want to hear how I must be failing in my job and how the system I believe in and fight for is useless then I can read the Daily Mail.

I am really sorry i have made you feel that way.

i disagree though, you have been incredibly negative from the start about 'allowing' a child to be flexi schooled and i would be very surprised if anything changed your mind about it...

regardless of that, i have not meant to offend you and i am sorry x

I am my own worst enemy. I cannot let things lie.

Feeble, I am not negative about flexible schooling but I cannot see how it would work successfully. That is why I was questioning you/ others about the practicalities. People can be negative about something/ dubious of its merits and change their mind when the other side is explained. Personally I don't think you can be in education and be unwilling to change your mind.

I am really unsure why people would choose this approach. I am still unclear what the benefits are. Most homeschoolers I have known have been confident that they are able to address the need for social interaction through clubs or meetings with others using the same approach and that their child is learning in a better environment. With this in mind I am not sure why someone would choose this approach? As I tried to explain, for me as a primary teacher I can see an awful lot of pitfalls such as the fact that my timetable is not set in stone meaning that there is no guarantee which areas of the curriculum will be accessed. I would think that aspect is easier in secondary school where timetables are followed.

But you have been negative about flexi schooling, you have repeatedly expressed that it wouldn't work for you when all I am wondering about is how well it could work for a child!

I think taking the opportunity to homeschool is a massive thing, you are saying you will 100% be in control of a child's education which is daunting for many, whereas with flexi schooling you are still following the schools teaching guidance, you are just offering personalised, one on one care with your own child rather than having them constantly be part of massive classes where perhaps disruptive children get all the attention (and let's make no mistake, they need it) and the teachers are unsupported and though (and everyone on this thread has said this) doing their best but perhaps fighting a loosing battle at times.

It should always be what works best for the child, we should not hinder their development because a teacher does not wish to cooperate (which, I am sorry, is 100% the attitude I received from your posts) there are circumstances where a child is part-time in school and, in many cases, it's incredibly beneficial for the school and the child.

I wanted to know why someone would choose it and how it would work. If not saying immediately 'oh that is great' when it is mentioned (and I am unsure of the benefits) is negative in your eyes then so be it. I have NEVER known a child to be in school part time. Lots of homeschoolers openly say that one of the reasons they homeschool is to avoid negative influences and disruptive children within the school. Surely flexible schooling means that they are still exposed to this? As someone who has taught many children with complex needs I have lots of experience in working flexibly to meet the needs of the child. As a professional though I will always question why something is happening in order to make sure that there are benefits to a certain approach, whether that is using a new reading scheme, implementing part of an IEP or flexischooling.

I wanted to know what the benefits of this approach are and why someone would choose this path. Only in your last post has anyone actually said what the perceived benefits of this approach is. Perhaps my experience inside the classroom means that I see pitfalls and problems that someone outside may not consider.

Anyway, as I did say a few posts ago, over and out. Me and my' negativity' are off to do something else.

 

[indy and lara]

Wheres the bashing in this thread then? people here are gaining more info on home schooling, I may not do it but wanted to know more about it anyway. Unless you mean my time at school as teacher bashing in which case they deserved that. Sadly they where not good teachers like some are.

Comments like teachers expecting children to be robots is bashing Dragonfly. It suggests we all just sit there, with no concerns for the individual and not allowing for any deviation. Not everyone who does not succeed as school does so because of teachers or schools. Some of that is down to the individual and some of it is down to the child's parents too. I for one cannot imagine taking a hands free approach to Em's education but many people do.

I didnt say that did I? I said we clock watched while teacher done something else we actually had nothing to do in class just where handed crosswords or told to do homework given in another class. I know all schools where not like where I was, my aunt works in the school I was in and isnt the same now a days. I wish I was home schooled but no one was there to school me. My kids wont be homes schooled though.

Oh heavens Dragonfly, you asked where we felt there was bashing and I gave one example. I didn't say 'you said this' but I answered your question. There have been multiple posters on this thread so I didn't think I needed to go through and say 'X said this', 'Y said that.'