Hospital vs home birth?

[JackiePed]

Lozzy, I understand that you can know that for your case, and im not discounting the research you have done, but your particular experience is not always the case, that's all I'm saying. There are situations in which those interventions truly are warranted. But if an intervention truly is warranted, then the birth is already not going well... Sometimes in the whirlwind and fuzz, all mommy remembers is the steps it took to get there. That doesn't mean it was all done for no reason.

Blah, I wasn't accusing you of scaremongering. I cautioned everyone in general not to shoot off terrifying stories and paint doctors/ hospitals as the enemy when it is often not the case. Those who have described their hospital experience in a positive light certainly wouldn't fall into that category, so no worries.

Peanut, you're right to encourage women to educate themselves. I also agree with you that many women don't do their own research... At ANY stage of pregnancy. Stating that it's odd of us to still be fine with going along with what our doctors deem the best option comes across as condescending. If we said we think it's odd that you want to give birth at home, we would be considered closed-minded, wouldn't we?
I realize your intentions are to educate... I know you in no way are trying to cause negative feelings. I just, again, want to ask those who are pro-hb to please watch for an undertone of bitterness toward docs/hospitals that can scare people withno prior experience, and to watch for an undertone of condescension toward those who choose a hospital birth. And, those of us who do prefer a hospital birth should watch what we say as well so as not to put unnecessary fears in the minds of those who are considering homebirths. That way we all get just the info with none of the need to defend ourselves on either side.

 

[Cherrybinky]

Im so glad Im not against either way of giving birth on this!

 

[lozzy21]

No your right, some times interventions are necessary but some times the necessary interventions are caused by unnecessary ones. It can be as simply as constant foetal monitoring when there's really no need for constant, intermittent would be enough. Because of this the woman is told she needs to stay on the bed meaning she cant stay upright and move to help the pain so she asks for pethidine or an epidural. Because shes had the pain relief and been stuck on her back baby couldn't get into the best position making labour longer so her and the baby gets tired, because shes tired and babys in a bad position she ends up with a forceps or vontouse delivery.

Its not called a cascade of intervention for nothing.

 

[Blah11]

meh, people can only give their own experiences and if that shows hospital births in a bad light, it cant be helped.

 

[Ju_bubbs]

I've had 3 hospital births, and 1 home birth. There was nothing particularly wrong with any of my hospital births, apart from the general lack of care that you'd expect when theres only 4-5 midwifes looking after 10 women in labour, that is. After my home birth experience, I really wouldn't ever consider another hospital birth unless it was certain my baby was going to need immediate medical attention, or something like that..

It never crissed my mind to do it at home the first 3 times, because like many I just automatically thought it would be too risky, and was scared! When I looked into it and researched it, I litrally kicked myself for going to hospital the first 3 times!!

I know this wont be the case for everyone, i'm just talking about me personlly... my homebirth was the best decision I ever made, the whole experience was so much better than any of my hospital births, it also wasn't until my home birth research taht I realised that I was entitled to make choices about my birth, such as how much they monitered babys HB, that I could get up and change positions if I wanted to.. which also made it generally a better experience! It was the first birth I had where I felt in control, rather than the midwives being in control... I cant wait to do it again!

 

[moomin_troll]

sorry i keep forgetting that every woman who plans a homebirth is stupid and putting our babies at risk because something is going to go wrong and our babies are going to die!

seriously why on earth would people like me plan a hb if it was so dangerous? and im getting so sick of people having this nieve opinion of homebirths

I don't think most people think that the hb itself is dangerous. People are aware that, sadly, birth complications CAN happen.. regardless of where you are birthing.. and some are saying that they feel better in a hospital where baby could receive immediate care/attention/surgery/whatever if something WERE to be wrong during/immediately after the birth.

I don't think anyone is blaming it on the homebirth itself... just saying that in a homebirth, emergency help isn't minutes away. Babies get tangled in the cord, babies are sometimes born with a surprise issue that requires immediate surgery... mommies hemorrhage unexpectedly...

sure.. it's not a frequent occurrence, but these people are saying "I FEEL better knowing help is minutes away."

i could also step out infront of a bus tomorrow if people want to live thinking about the bad things then i doubt anyone would get pregnant in the first place.

also people seem to be quoating me and not actualy getting the point! i no for a fact that if i was at home and something happened i would get seen to by the hospital faster then if i was actualy there.
yes my hospital experience was horrible, my local hospital kill more people then help. am i trying to scare people? no because no one here has to go to that hospital.

also for the mums who hemorrhage my mum did really badly when she had me in hospital and they left her by herself and she thought she was going to die watching the blood spill on the floor...so again being in hospital didnt do her much good.

i rang for help when i needed to push and waiting 30 mins for someone to come and even then they only came to my room because my oh went to the front desk and dragged the bitch to my room....how on earth is that safer? something could of been wrong and they didnt give a sh*t.

so for me it is safer to be at home because id have a mw there and then a very quick trip to the hospital.

people dont seem to get that being in hospital ISNT always safer

and people have said they feel hbs are dangerous when they arent if people actualy look at facts rather then just how they feel

 

[Nikki_d72]

That's understandable-- and if you've had a bad experience, one can see how you would seek alternative routes to birthing.

I wish I knew what I do now though, and I wouldn't have had that bad experience in the first place. I've had to learn the hard way and if I can save just one woman from making similar mistakes then I'll be happy. I did read all about aspects of birth before my 1st birth too, that's the irony, I thought I was well informed but what I read was all pretty standard texts and didn't prepare me in any way, shape or form for the way things were handled on the big day. I was too weak and afraid to push any points and was scared and intimidated and thought the best thing was to do what I was told. I left there feeling so grateful that they'd saved my baby's life and possibly mine too. I know different now. I don't want to scare anyone out of hospital births at all, just that they go in having done their research with their eyes open and the knowledge that they may have to be strong to stick to what they believe in, like you did. I want women to feel that it's perfectly fine to question their doctors and to decline anything they are not happy with - they are not gods, just folk who went to University for some years.

 

[lozzy21]

One thing that i find amusing is lots of people i know in real life say they wouldent have a home birth but have had their babys at the birth centre. Our local birth centre is a good 20/30 mins away from the hospital yet where we live is less than 10 mins away from the hospital.

People just are not aware of the care you get at home, they just think of midwifes on tv sending people for hot water and clean towels.

 

[Blah11]

we have a new birthing centre which is lovely and on hospital grounds It would be my 2nd choice.

 

[pink sparkle]

Im pretty sure that whether at home or in hospital we all just want our babies born safe and well...tbh as long as baby and I are fine I dont care where my baby is born..at home, hospital or in the car on the way!

I plan to have my third baby in hospital as i did with my previous two, everyone has their own opinion and have had their own experiences, my hospital experiences havent been bad at all no 'unecessary interventions' and i plan to labour there. I would happily welcome an extremely quick suprise birth at home so long as baby is fine though ...my cousins came in a hurry and was born on her bathroom floor!

Whether you are choosing to have your baby at hospital or at home good luck to you! xxx

 

[PeanutBean]

I don't see how it's condescending to consider an alternative, or opposite, view odd. I find it odd that people vote Conservative. I find it odd that people don't care about the environment. I find it odd that people dislike science. I find it odd that people like garage music. Does that mean I am automatically looking down on them? (Well maybe the Tories...). If people are looking at my opinions and finding them condescending then I argue that is because they are not secure in their own.

 

[Blah11]

its still not nice to get the 'omg youre crazy' raised eyebrow look when you mention a homebirth.

 

[Samantha675]

its still not nice to get the 'omg youre crazy' raised eyebrow look when you mention a homebirth.

A month before I became pregnant with my son, I said 'oh you'd have to be nuts to have a home birth." Then I got pregnant, and I started to really think about where I wanted to birth, and realized, that I wouldn't go to the hospital any other time in my life for a normal event, unless I was ill or hurt, so why do it when I am having a baby? I chose a midwife (who ultimately let me down), and felt I did everything I could to have my baby at home that way I wanted to. While that didn't happen, I learned a lot and I am doing things a bit differently this time, and plan to stay at home for this birth.

I do care about where my baby is born, I deeply value the act of birth and what it means to me and for me. I think it can be the most powerful experience of my entire life and I look forward to it.

 

[indy and lara]

I always find these threads interesting as there is absolutely no way I would even consider it but it is always good to see things from the other side too.

We lost our son because of a cord accident. When I was pg with Emma I was high risk as he had had a cord abnormality and there was no way of knowing if it had happened again until after birth. HB for us the 2nd time round would have been reckless as immediate medical intervention would have been needed had it happened to Emma if she was to have any chance of survival. But even 1st time round I felt much safer knowing that if immediate intervention was needed after birth then it was there, not a 15- 30 minute journey away depending on time of day. while the MW may have been there, she doesn't come with a full barage of medical support beside her.

Emma didn't have the same problems and we thought we had got away Scot free, for her to stop breathing about 2 hours after birth and have to be rushed to recuss and then SCBU. I don't know if we had had to call an ambulance out if she would have made it. Quite frankly having gone through that once I have no intention of ever thinking it through either.

For me having a hospital birth was the only option. It feels safer. It feels less risky and that is all I am looking for. I know that my body can give birth and I have full faith in that so my choice is not based upon lack of faith in my body. I didn't have an epi either time in hospital so it is not that either. I did twice have strapped to the bed births though but again, they were fine. No tearing either time and not protracted pushing either(an hour both times). As others have said choosing hospital birth is not necessarily because people are ill informed. Many people choose them because they are informed and when they weigh up the pros and cons, the pros are higher. At the end of the day, we all just want to bring baby into the world safely, however we choose to do it.

 

[cosmicgirlxxx]

I'm neither for or against home birth, it's not for me but that's just my opinion.
I would however like to say that my son was arm presentation with cord prolapse. The crash team were called and I found my self in theatre 3 mins later, he was born exactly 7.5 mins after the crash call (I have a copy of my hospital notes which is why I know the exact timings). Just thought I'd add this as a few of the posts said that crash team takes a lot longer to congregate x

 

[Sherileigh]

What scares me is some of the hospitals people must've used! Horehound care! Our hospitals aren't perfect but when my sons HB kept crashing I had about 15 people in the room to help ASAP!! And there were no interventions made just precautions taken just in case they had to give me a c-section. Even the aftercare I have some issues but there will always be issues. I had wonderful care from most of the nurses and someone was always there to help when I needed it!

 

[JackiePed]

i could also step out infront of a bus tomorrow if people want to live thinking about the bad things then i doubt anyone would get pregnant in the first place.

also people seem to be quoating me and not actualy getting the point! i no for a fact that if i was at home and something happened i would get seen to by the hospital faster then if i was actualy there.



people dont seem to get that being in hospital ISNT always safer

and people have said they feel hbs are dangerous when they arent if people actualy look at facts rather then just how they feel

Moomin, I was in no way trying to attack you. I think my tone was polite and neutral, and I don't recall writing anything that was getting on your case, personally. I was trying to explain to you where people are coming from... in fact, the point of my post that you quoted was specifically to distinguish the difference between women saying "a hb is dangerous" v.s. women saying "I prefer having emergency help minutes away."-- I was actually trying to diffuse something that seemed to be really upsetting you....so I wanted you to know that many of us aren't throwing your choice in the 'dangerous' category, but simply have our own comfort level of preparation for the unlikely emergency.

Of course there are exceptions, and it sounds like your hospital experience is one of them. I don't know how I quoted you and didn't get the point, but I'm sorry if that's how it came across.

Now, I don't appreciate the cutesie smack on the forehead smiley and the comment, "You could also step in front of a bus tomorrow." This is you treating women who prefer a hospital birth like scared, uninformed Stepford wives.... and you know what? We're not. Don't treat us like dummies because we want to be prepared for the unlikely event that something requiring emergency care may occur-- and the way we feel most prepared is at a (hopefully previously researched) hospital.

Listen.... there are some ladies on here who are simply defending their choice to homebirth--there's nothing wrong with that, and they are doing so in an intelligent and respectful manner. I think everyone appreciates that. Then there are ladies who are continuing to assume that women who aren't comfortable with a homebirth must not be 'looking at the facts', and smacking their foreheads as if we're just a bunch of dunces.

Just let us choose a hospital birth if that is the best choice for us. Period. I don't remember criticizing homebirths at all. If I have challenged anyone on here, it's in what they have said... NOT their decision to hb OR their reasons behind it. You don't want people to challenge your choices, don't challenge ours.

 

[JackiePed]

I don't see how it's condescending to consider an alternative, or opposite, view odd. I find it odd that people vote Conservative. I find it odd that people don't care about the environment. I find it odd that people dislike science. I find it odd that people like garage music. Does that mean I am automatically looking down on them? (Well maybe the Tories...). If people are looking at my opinions and finding them condescending then I argue that is because they are not secure in their own.

No worries-- tone on here can get a little heated. nbd.

 

[JackiePed]

meh, people can only give their own experiences and if that shows hospital births in a bad light, it cant be helped.

Agreed-- I didn't mean to imply someone can't give a bad story. You had brought up the point that you were someone who is pro hb but said you had a positive hospital experience, so I was referring to your positive experience and saying that I wasn't referring to you in the post that asked people to watch for scaremongering. When I talk about scaremongering I'm referring to the posts that imply that these intervention WILL be pushed on you, and you WILL have to go in fighting, and doctors don't care and just want you out of there... etc... <----(and please don't any specific person take that personally, I promise I am not aiming that at any specific person, so no need to respond to it, please. It was just a general request to watch how we color others experiences that haven't even happened yet.)

I was only referring to generalizations, not peoples' personal stories. Those are their own to share.

 

[moomin_troll]

i dont need you to be "explain" to me that women feel differently about where they give birth. im not stupid
all of my friends and my mum have had hospital births and i dont judge any of them and they dont call my choices dangerous so yes im going to get my back up when this has been said afew times on this thread and to me that comes across as very misinformed so im not going to take the people who have made those comments seriously at all!

some women on this thread have made out they are being attacked for having a hospital birth when infact it is the other way around, but just because some of us feel safer at home and trust our bodies we are the ones seen as to be condescending