I actually don't understand how people can say that it doesn't matter how your child gets here, as long as they do so safely. Giving birth is a major event in a woman's life. You'd be disappointed if your wedding day didn't go to plan, giving birth is a whole lot bigger than that. I tried for home births twice and ended up with sections twice, I'm plumping for an elective next time as at least that way some part of my birth may go to plan.
I was very lucky in that my MWs were very supportive, as was my partner. But there are so many women out there that have been traumatised by their experience. You can't just say to someone that's experienced a horrendous birth, or who feels that their experience was handled badly by medical professionals, to get over it as they have a healthy baby - that totally dismisses a woman's feelings and experience.
Back on topic, I don't see anything wrong with epidurals, but I do think they are overused as a way of coping with understaffing - a woman with an epi doesn't need much attention until close to birth (in their eyes), whereas a woman going natural needs coaching through the pain, intermittent monitoring etc.
It honestly doesnt bother me how my babies got here.
Everyone is different.
I had a woman say I dont want a section cos I feel like I have failed.. Nobody fails when it comes to labour, not everyone has the birth experience they want to have but you just gotta let it go. Whats the point in being dissapointed and upset, its happened and its not gonna change.
My mum cries her eyes out when she tells people what I went through and I just sit there. When I came out of hospital my HV came round and examined me and said if I needed I could get some anti depressants. I didnt need them but my mum was so cut up I said she should of had some..
Well Laura, I never thought the day would come but I have to say that I completely agree with you
I completely and utterly had no care as to how Emma got here. It would not have mattered in the slightest if I had had a section or an epi. All that mattered to me was to have my baby safely here.
As ever though (Marley I don't mean you, I just wanted to answer your 1st point) this seems to be getting into 'I'm allowed my point of view' rather than reading what people are saying. The original question was about epis and as I said, if someone has chosen that route then it does not mean that they never researched the side effects or that they were pushed into that route by medical professionals, it may be that was their considered choice. It was mine but I just couldn't sit still enough for it to be done safely. I DID need pain relief, hence my decision to then have pethidene. Gas and air just made me vomit- pointless for me!
For me, I cannot understand why people would be disappointed if they had to use pain relief. That is because I come from a different school of thought altogether. If your child is here then
Ithink that is the important thing to focus on. Having been on the other side it is very hard to understand why, when your baby is here and safe, you are still upset. But that is just something I can't relate to. I have no issue with people wanting a natural birth but surely I am allowed to say that it was not important to me? Someone else's decision and feelings do not belittle the birth I had- why would they? My daughter is here and safe and at the end of the day, that is what makes a 'successful and positive' birth for me.
It was asking how I FEEL about natural vs. epi's if I read correctly. 
