MrsD140810
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- Joined
- May 7, 2013
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Hi ladies,
It's horrible having to be on this forum! Here's my story. Absolutely thrilled to find out I was pregnant at the beginning of August. When I was 7 weeks pregnant, I had some brown spotting. I went for an early ultrasound and there was no sign of the baby. My hcg level kept rising though, so the doctors were concerned it was an ectopic pregnancy. I had a laparoscopy and the 'good' news is it wasn't ectopic and I haven't had a tube removed. The doctors are calling it a miscarriage, but it was slightly complicated as my hcg level was rising. They removed 'something' in the operation and now the levels have dropped.
Close family who were so incredibly supportive and concerned when I was in hospital, now think I'm fine. I get the impression that because I am recovering well physically, they think I'm back to my normal self and it's all in the past. My husband has been amazing but he doesn't even talk to me about how he feels.
So here I am, physically getting better, heading back to work tomorrow but feeling like an emotional mess. Life feels empty. I just feel depressed and angry all the time. I'm trying hard to be positive and realise that I have a good chance of getting pregnant again in the future. But all I want is my baby and I feel like no one understands that. I feel pathetic every time I cry.
The other problem is, only close friends and family know I had a miscarriage. Most people at work just think I have had an operation. So I find myself having to pretend that everything is fine and I'm happy when inside I'm not. How do I get through this?
Sorry for the long, depressed message. I just needed to let it all out!
It's horrible having to be on this forum! Here's my story. Absolutely thrilled to find out I was pregnant at the beginning of August. When I was 7 weeks pregnant, I had some brown spotting. I went for an early ultrasound and there was no sign of the baby. My hcg level kept rising though, so the doctors were concerned it was an ectopic pregnancy. I had a laparoscopy and the 'good' news is it wasn't ectopic and I haven't had a tube removed. The doctors are calling it a miscarriage, but it was slightly complicated as my hcg level was rising. They removed 'something' in the operation and now the levels have dropped.
Close family who were so incredibly supportive and concerned when I was in hospital, now think I'm fine. I get the impression that because I am recovering well physically, they think I'm back to my normal self and it's all in the past. My husband has been amazing but he doesn't even talk to me about how he feels.
So here I am, physically getting better, heading back to work tomorrow but feeling like an emotional mess. Life feels empty. I just feel depressed and angry all the time. I'm trying hard to be positive and realise that I have a good chance of getting pregnant again in the future. But all I want is my baby and I feel like no one understands that. I feel pathetic every time I cry.
The other problem is, only close friends and family know I had a miscarriage. Most people at work just think I have had an operation. So I find myself having to pretend that everything is fine and I'm happy when inside I'm not. How do I get through this?
Sorry for the long, depressed message. I just needed to let it all out!