How painful was your miscarriage?

[Gingertea]

I had a natural miscarriage on Tues 6th Sept. It began with dull cramping and escalated into something I can only describe as pain enough to make one pass out. My pain came in waves, with each peak having a clot come through. On Weds, bleeding was heavy and cramps were still there. On Thursday, no more cramps and lighter bleeding. Husband and I went for afternoon tea yesterday at a nice hotel just to relax after all that has happened and out of nowhere I started to feel pain - again. I was so confused I rang the GP. No available slot. I stupidly went into the local pharmacy, dazed and lightheaded with the sharp stabbing pain. I could barely walk and the pharmacist prescribed - would you believe it, a bowel relaxant. Husband then said we should just go to hospital as by this time, I couldn't breathe nor see properly. When we arrived, the queue was massive and I was told there would be a 2 hour wait. OMG. I felt all clammy and felt my lower abdomen sort of squeezing itself. I got to the loo and another big clot came out. I fished it out and - found myself staring at my sac. I couldnt believe it didn't all come out on Tues night. The pain was gone after this came out. I still had to wait for the docs to check. Apparently, my cervix was blocked and body was trying to expel the remaining bits of pregnancy tissue- that's why I was in so much pain.
Am better today, no more bleeding. On a scale of 1-10, I would say the pain I experienced during my miscarriage is 9 - comparable to breaking a bone or having someone knock the wind out of you.

 

[blueskai]

i cant actually comment on miscarriage pains as it never happened naturally for me i had a d and c 2 days ago but have had labour pains and have given birth to my son which i actually found really enjoyable loved it yes it killed but you are holding something at the end of it that you love so its worth it.

Really don't think you should have mentioned how enjoyable it was giving birth to your son in this thread. All the ladies here, like yourself, have suffered a terrible loss, and many ache to hold the baby that they have lost. The labour pains of giving birth to a forever baby are nothing in comparison to the pain we feel everyday while we miss our little ones. We have nothing to hold.


For someone who has experienced a loss I thought you would have considered that before posting how wonderful your full term labour was.
Sorry if anyone thinks I'm out of order, I just completely felt like you were rubbing it in.

 

[Hannah :)]

Heya i've never posted here before im in wtt but i've popped over a couple of times just to have a little look after i had a MC at 5weeks in May.
With mine i had no pain whats so ever, it was quite bizzar. Even the nurse who was dealing with me said she'd not seen many like it. It was just a heavy period with a few more blood clots than usual. For some stupid reson at the time i felt abit cheated though, it felt like if it was painful i would feel like a physical loss and be able to say goodbye properly but instead i had no pain and it felt like my baby wasnt even there. Obvs i know now that i was lucky to have no pain but it still niggles at me in the back of my brain sometimes

x

 

[Jenna1984]

Heya i've never posted here before im in wtt but i've popped over a couple of times just to have a little look after i had a MC at 5weeks in May.
With mine i had no pain whats so ever, it was quite bizzar. Even the nurse who was dealing with me said she'd not seen many like it. It was just a heavy period with a few more blood clots than usual. For some stupid reson at the time i felt abit cheated though, it felt like if it was painful i would feel like a physical loss and be able to say goodbye properly but instead i had no pain and it felt like my baby wasnt even there. Obvs i know now that i was lucky to have no pain but it still niggles at me in the back of my brain sometimes

x

This is somewhat reassuring for me. Currently waiting to mc after being told i had had an mmc last Friday. I am terrified of the prospect of how much it's going to hurt. Thank you all for your honest descriptions ladies, here's hoping it's not too bad for me xx

 

[HappyAuntie]

Heya i've never posted here before im in wtt but i've popped over a couple of times just to have a little look after i had a MC at 5weeks in May.
With mine i had no pain whats so ever, it was quite bizzar. Even the nurse who was dealing with me said she'd not seen many like it. It was just a heavy period with a few more blood clots than usual. For some stupid reson at the time i felt abit cheated though, it felt like if it was painful i would feel like a physical loss and be able to say goodbye properly but instead i had no pain and it felt like my baby wasnt even there. Obvs i know now that i was lucky to have no pain but it still niggles at me in the back of my brain sometimes

x

This is somewhat reassuring for me. Currently waiting to mc after being told i had had an mmc last Friday. I am terrified of the prospect of how much it's going to hurt. Thank you all for your honest descriptions ladies, here's hoping it's not too bad for me xx

I'm so sorry for your loss, Jenna. How far along were you?

 

[Jenna1984]

Hi HappyAuntie,

Thank you. Found out at 12 week scan that we lost our bub at approx 8-9 weeks. Have found this site a massive help xx

 

[HappyAuntie]

Hi HappyAuntie,

Thank you. Found out at 12 week scan that we lost our bub at approx 8-9 weeks. Have found this site a massive help xx

Hun, I don't want to frighten you, and you have to do what is right for you, but at 12 weeks I strongly encourage you to have a D&C/ERPC instead of waiting for it to happen naturally.

I've had 3 mc. The first was like yours, a mmc diagnosed at 12 weeks, and I mc naturally. The second was at 8 weeks and I had a D&C/ERPC, and the third was just two weeks ago at 5 weeks, and I mc naturally.

My first mc was horrifically painful and traumatic. I wound up in the hospital because I was hemhorrhaging so badly and because the physical pain was far more than any acetaminophen or ibuprofen could handle - I needed the kind of painkillers you can only get in a hospital. Once in the hospital, I passed the gestational sac intact. Even though the baby had stopped developing a few weeks earlier, the sac had continued to grow and was a little bigger than a chicken egg. For something that large to pass thru your cervix, you have labor pains. It comes in waves and keeps getting worse and worse until the mc is finally over, and that could last hours (mine went on for ~ 8-9 hrs) or even days for some women. The pain was so bad I almost vomited in the waiting room. The psychological and emotional trauma of seeing the sac come out of me is something I am still dealing with 2 1/2 years later.

My second mc was diagnosed at 8 weeks, and I was so terrified of having another natural mc that I begged the dr to do a D&C/ERPC as soon as possible - he was a saint and worked me into his lunch hour the next day so that I didn't have to risk another experience so painful and so terrifying. My 3rd was a natural mc at 5 weeks, and while it was painful, it was nothing at all like the pain of the mc at 12 weeks - it was more akin to really bad period cramps.

I know that for some women it's important to mc naturally - they feel it gives them a sense of closure. In my experience, though, there is no closure no matter how the mc happens. The emotional pain of losing a baby is the same no matter how the mc happens or how far along you were, and a piece of that pain will be with you for the rest of your days. You get no badge of courage for going through the physical pain as well. If I ever have another mc further along than 5 or 6 weeks, I will have another D&C/ERPC without hesitation.

You are already enduring the emotional pain of losing your baby - please consider being kind to yourself and sparing yourself the physical pain as well. And please forgive me if I've upset you, these are just the things I wish someone had told me before my 1st mc - it might have made it less frightening if I'd known what to expect.

 

[newmrsg]

My first MC (chemical) was not too bad... It was like AF cramp x2.... My second MC at 7w3d was very intense... I have a hard time remembering exactly how it felt.. I think being so mental hurt it almost block out the physical part of it... But I do know it was very very painful

 

[leahh]

I'm so sorry to hear of all the losses experience by all of you ladies. I also experience a lot of pain in my miscarriage. I was approximately 7 weeks along. It felt like someone had stuck a knife in me as was slowly cutting. That might sound dramatic but I'm not sure how else to phrase it. I was actually on a return flight after just visiting my husband who was out of the country for a short while. It started right after take off and did not let up for hours. I just kept bleeding and was a mess by the time we landed but there wasn't much that could be done for it while I was in the air. Mercifully, there was no permanent damage done and I check out by my doctor shortly there after and was told I would be fine. That was a few years ago and now I'm pregnant again. I'm at 8 weeks now which felt like a huge hurdle, and everything is going well. I pray that it will continue.

 

[me n tweek]

i am currently in the limbo waiting for my 2nd scan to verify a mmc ... i should be 9 weeks but my first scan showed baby had stopped growing at 6 weeks. i am bleeding a bit with an odd cramp or two, similar to, but not really as bad as AF cramps. i passed a clot yesterday but none today. i will definitely opt for a d+c next week when mmc can be confirmed. so scared to go through the kind of pain described in this thread .... you ladies are amazing to be able to go through something so awful and come out the other side and be optimistic, and to share your stories with others. it helps some bit to know what to expect if it happens, as i think if it just came upon me without having read about all of your experiences i would totally freak out.
thank you, and i am so sorry for all of your losses (as well as my own)

 

[cutebowsxx]

Babys HB stopped at 8+4, but I was actually about 10 weeks pregnant. I chose the medical route, but a natural m/c happened before I made it back to the hospital for the second dose of tablets. So it started off at home, where I passed the baby, then I went in to hospital and passed the rest (more large clots and placenta).

The pain was bearable, to me it just felt like very bad period pains. The feeling before I passed the clots was disgusting, but not complete agony. I didn't realise how much blood/clots there would be, so all this made me feel faint, and i was so close to passing out. I was also sick once due to the shock. I felt extremely weak and was dripping with sweat However, I was in extreme pain once the doctor had to use forceps to remove the placenta. I was almost jumping off the bed with the pain.

Lots of to you all xxx

 

[cutebowsxx]

i cant actually comment on miscarriage pains as it never happened naturally for me i had a d and c 2 days ago but have had labour pains and have given birth to my son which i actually found really enjoyable loved it yes it killed but you are holding something at the end of it that you love so its worth it.

Television, I don't find you're post offensive at all. To me, all you are explaining is how the labour pains were different to your m/c pains, which is basically what the first post asks. And I completely agree with you. I just posted a reply here, and quickly edited it because I mentioned the labour with my son!

Reading some responses to television's post are dreadful She's just suffered a loss herself and some of the comments would be really upsetting if it were me. We should all stick together and support each other. I completely understand many people would want to avoid talking about babies all together, but then other's don't mind, especially if you have other children. We all have different ways of grieving.

I would take the post in a positive way, because it gives hope for the future

 

[Stressbucket]

Looking at this, I realize I was terribly lucky. I had a few hours of bad cramping for several days running, but it wasn't nearly as bad as my first period, which was a pure nightmare--or most of my periods through my mid-twenties, for that matter. When I was fifteen, I got off a bus at the wrong stop to throw up in the gutter because my cramps were so bad, so really, this wasn't much. Not fun, but not unmanageable.

Maybe it was just raw determination. Once I accepted what was happening, I was absolutely determined to avoid a D&C. I'm not sure why, just that the doctor mentioned it as an option, and I was just "Oh, HELL no, under no circumstances, I am going to go home and bleed in my own bathroom with the fuzzy purple bathmat, and YOU CAN'T STOP ME."

I just couldn't deal with any more medical intervention at the moment, although if it had been necessary, of course, I would have. As it happened, my hormones and my uterus cooperated with my whims (after crapping out completely on what I actually cared about, mind you).

 

[blueskai]

i cant actually comment on miscarriage pains as it never happened naturally for me i had a d and c 2 days ago but have had labour pains and have given birth to my son which i actually found really enjoyable loved it yes it killed but you are holding something at the end of it that you love so its worth it.

Television, I don't find you're post offensive at all. To me, all you are explaining is how the labour pains were different to your m/c pains, which is basically what the first post asks. And I completely agree with you. I just posted a reply here, and quickly edited it because I mentioned the labour with my son!

Reading some responses to television's post are dreadful She's just suffered a loss herself and some of the comments would be really upsetting if it were me. We should all stick together and support each other. I completely understand many people would want to avoid talking about babies all together, but then other's don't mind, especially if you have other children. We all have different ways of grieving.

I would take the post in a positive way, because it gives hope for the future

If you're referring to my response to television's post, then I apologise if you feel I was out of order. However, I do feel that this wasn't the time or place to discuss how wonderful giving birth to a forever baby was, and in my opinion was not a response fitting for the nature of this thread. I completely acknowledged that she too had suffered a loss, and I guess that's why I found it hard to understand why she would write such a post, if she knew the heartbreak it causes.

Anyway, that's just how I felt about her post after being in a very dark place just over two years after my own loss, the exact reason I joined this forum. I didn't find it encouraging, positive, hopeful or uplifting, quite the opposite to be fair. But I apologise if you felt I was out of order.

xo

 

[Dotty_B]

I'm firmly in the 'most horrifically painful experience of my life so far' camp with this one, although having heard other peoples stories I still think I got off pretty lightly.

I had a MMC in December 2011, which started with an absolutely horrible sense of 'somethings wrong' from about 6-7 weeks. At 11 weeks I woke up with the exact stomach and back cramps which usually signalled AF was imminent, and that afternoon I had some bright red spotting. The cramps continued until the next afternoon but I think deep down I knew - I'd been right all along. On 11+4 we had the scan, where they said they believed baby stopped growing at 7 weeks. I was given all the options, but I was also sent home as another scan was needed a week later before they would 100% call it (something about the growth of everything being 0.4mm away from a 'viable' pregnancy). My brain had obviously caught up with my body by that point, as I started to spot brown blood that afternoon, and on 12+4 everything happened naturally. I woke up with what felt like AF cramps, which got worse. And worse. And worse. OH tried to get me to go to the hospital but I couldn't even face sitting in the car for the 10 minutes it would have taken to get there (and for some reason I was also worried about getting blood everywhere?!!? Like that mattered by that point!). A hot water bottle, pacing the flat, the strongest pain killers Boots would sell my Husband, standing in a hot shower, NOTHING even touched the pain until I passed the sac. Felt like a lifetime, but only lasted about 2-3 hours from start to 'bearable'. From what I've read that was a 'good' experience compared to others.

But even after all that, I'm glad I did it naturally. It showed me that my body knew what to do, and in a way it gave me a bit more confidence in it - in that it's not completely useless. I also think the fact I had a natural one is responsible for my periods returning to normal straight away, and now 5 months later I'm as regular as I was before. Everyone is different, but it was the right choice for me.

Big to everyone who's been through this, and who is going through it. No one can tell you the right or wrong way to handle things, do whats best for you

D xx

 

[cakelover]

I had a MC at 11 weeks. I have painful periods where Im sweating and vomiting so I thought a MC pain would be tolerable in comparison. This is the first Ive ever spoken about it. The pain was horrific, and being sent away from the hospital when I started spotting and told to expect the miscarriage, to go through this "natural pain" was barbaric. The pain started days before It got really bad, and in total the MC took about 5 hours - started with contraction staged pain that no pain killers could take away. For the last hour and a half it was unbearable, sweating profusely with a raging temperature I couldn't call out for help let alone scream in pain, then came the violent vomiting which wouldn't stop. When I passed the "sack" it was a relief. I couldn't even hold my body up to sit on the toilet and was trying to hang on to the door frames. The worst thing about this kind of pain is that theres nothing at the end of it, no prize, and It doesnt seem to end either, 6 weeks later and Im still bleeding. The phycological repercussions are immense, but I think if women were given more help (painkillers) to go through the trauma of a MC then maybe the whole experience would be easier to bear. This whole experience has left me in awe of how amazing women are!! - we are all built to withstand the worst physical, and emotional pain that exists. we rock, and need to tell ourselves that in the mirror every morning!! xx

 

[FeLynn]

I have had 3 losses. only one was a natural miscarriage so I will save you the details on the others.

I was waiting for my period to come from my 1st loss (mmc) 14 weeks no period I landed in the er due to horrible pains I was doubled over! I landed in the er again a week later still no sign of my period but I had a big bleed and a lot of blood clots. At the ER they told me I had an incomplete miscarriage so I was sent home to finish it out. We had thought the worse part was over and from looking at the ultrasounds and comparing we knew something wasnt adding up. 2 days later I started having bad back pains and cramping was getting worse and I had contractions and my vagina was hurting I could feel my cervix stretching. It was so horrible and lasted from 3pm to 4am the next morning when I passed a sac I was a about 5-7 weeks

 

[amjon]

For me it was comparable to labor (had an induced labor for stillborn at 27 weeks ). Labor was probably slightly less and Tylenol worked for MC but not labor.

 

[9jawife]

Mine was comparable to a period as far as pain level, but then again my baby was "only" six weeks.

 

[Kaylen]

I just read all posts in this thread and decided to share my experience. I am miscarrying right now... We never found out how far along I was but my hCG did not go past 500. I think I was about 4.5 weeks when the first sings of mc started (this past Wednesday). On Friday I woke up and my entire body was hurting. I went to work but couldn't make it past noon. Then my doctor alled and said my hcg dropped and I was mc...On Saturday I started feeling these sharp sudden pains that would only last a few seconds but were very painful. No bleeding yet at this point. Then the next day (today) I started bleeding a big and passing tissue. And I am having a lot of pain - period like but a lot worse and the Tylenol isn't helping. So I am waiting now for it to be over - hopefully soon. I don't understand why it is happening and I am so scared that I will never be able to have a baby. We were so excited when we found out I was pregnant and only a week later I can't stop crying.