Husband not happy!

[AP]

Mod note: If members feel a thread may not fall within the forum rules, or you have feedback, please contact the forum team and allow us to deal with it.

OP I'm sorry your husband is acting like this it is of no fault of your own and I do agree that he should be ask to leave. I hope maybe that would give him time to reflect on his behaviour and take some responsibility.

 

[Kmx]

How awful you are having to go through this. Your husband is behaving awfully and it would be difficult to forgive if I were you. In what way does he believe this is solely your fault? He is as much responsible as you are. I'm so angry for you.

Does he have anywhere he could go and live? Would he leave if you asked him to? I think he needs a severe wake up call.

 

[Laurenmomma]

My 3rd child was a complete surprise, I already had a 2 year old and 1 year old and the new baby just fit in! We were definitely not comfortable money wise at the time but you make it work!

The baby was in my room then went in with the oldest his sister as she was a better sleeper, he's now in a room with his brother in bunk beds and they are the dream together! Such good friends!

 

[nickinakinoo]

To be honest I don't get where he is coming from at all, how can holidays be more important than a child. I asked my hubby too for a male opinion and his male opinion is your husband is being (insert various rude words here)

I hope he sees sense, I hope he apologises to you and I hope he can live with the guilt of what he is putting you through.

Big hugs, stay strong x

 

[Peanut112]

I'm sorry he's behaving that way. It's not right whatsoever.

When I told my OH the news, he was treating me like poop right up until today. 4 weeks later. He has a kid, he wanted another.. but I was the shit under his shoe for the longest time and we're just starting to patch things up now.

There is no biological way that your OH can't love this baby like he loves the others. He'll get over his hissy fit. If you decide to terminate, he will hate himself. Trust me.

However, terminating is NOT his choice. Its YOURS. YOUR body, YOUR baby.

It's international Womans day! Be strong and remember that you're a mom! Being a mom means everything. Moms have the strength to do the things that the rest of the world can't. Whatever road you choose, whether or not it is to leave him (take a break) stay, terminate… Remember that it's YOUR decision. You choose what's best for you and your babies. The rest of the "mom" world will stand behind you and your decisions, knowing that you'd do what's best. Because that's what moms do.. even if they have no idea what they're doing. They always do whats best. I hope everything works out in your favour.

 

[laila 44]

Omg. No word. Sorry u are going through this. Hugs xx

 

[Misscalais]

Same thing happened to me, except baby #4 and we only have a 2 bedroom house at the moment!
DH had actually gone to the dr to get a referral for the snip but the dr said no he's too young and to come back later after thinking about it... i was furious! So obviously using protection and we still managed to have a slip up some how. DH was absolutely mortified, wanted an abortion, wouldn't speak to me etc but we are 36 weeks now and everything is fine with us and he talks happily about the baby.
Good luck i hope all will be ok x

 

[Msw454]

Thank you everyone for your support and advice! I appreciate it all! I'm happy to say that over the last few days he's been much better. Certainly not involved with the pregnancy, but at least not horrible to me. After he said that bit about me being alone and what not, I left the house for a couple of hours. When I returned he had cooled down and apologized. Its been 6 days since we found out, and every day has gotten a little better, so I really hope it continues that way. I've told him that I'm prepared to raise the baby on my own if that's the way he wants it, and if he continues talking to me like that it's exactly what I'll do. I am honestly so shocked at how badly he took the news.

 

[Daisy29]

Good on you for being so strong and sticking in there. We've all been there before and said things we didn't mean. Maybe he has realised that and things will get better. All the best x

 

[Bekah78]

Sounds like he was trying to emotionally blackmail you into doing what he wanted.

So glad you stood up to him and told him you'd raise the baby alone. He knows now what the answer will be if he were ever to ask you to choose between him and the baby.

Must have been a shock to you both but hopefully in time he will see this baby as another blessing. Hope you have a happy and healthy 9 months.

 

[kittylady]

Some partners can take a while to get used to the idea of another baby, they often think more practically and worry about financial issues. My husband only wanted 2 and was in shock for a few weeks after we found out we are having a surprise 3rd. He worried about how we are going to cope and needing a bigger car, we are also moving house and both studying and will have assignment and exams during this period, he has a lot of upheaval at work and worried how it would affect that.

His mum has now helped us get a car this last week. We are trying to pack and do as much as possible now even though it will be later in my pregnancy that we move. He has now accepted it and talks about the new baby, he isn't looking forward to the sleep though, I think he'd prefer if I gave birth to a 1 year old lol.

I'm glad to see things are improving, once they see the baby most men have a complete turn around.

 

[ElmoBumpToBe]

Really glad that things seem to be turning into the right direction. You did the right thing, very brave and mature to tell him you will raise the baby alone it that's the way he wants it, and it would seem to me that it's not the way he wants it. Hope you have a happy and healthy 8 months! X

 

[medic76097]

Even with things looking better now, do you think you'll be able to move past that hurt?

 

[KatO79]

I agree with medic^

How was his apology BTW? Was it a real apology with he knows he did wrong and he should never have said and done those things and he'll make it up to you or was it just a "Sorry" without any real conviction behind it?

 

[6lilpigs]

Really pleased hes softening up a little Hopefully soon youll both be getting excited about the new little member and will be looking forward to the milestones together!