I am so jealous of friends bump... is that weird?

[SaraVO]

So my husband has a friend from high school who is less than two weeks ahead of me and she keeps posting baby bump pictures on Facebook. She did a post today that they're finding out the gender today. I'm in five days. But seriously she looks so much more pregnant than I do. For two months I've seen her bump get bigger and bigger and I just want to cry that I'm still in my same pants and they're still looser on me than before I was pregnant.

My best friend says I'm lucky and maybe I will be one of those women that doesn't ever have to look really pregnant. That did make me cry.

I know that wanting to look pregnant is probably weird but I was hoping I would at least be in maternity pants for thanksgiving and I really don't think I will be. I'm pretty dang sure I'm feeling the baby move in the last couple of days and I know I'm healthy I'm just so impatient. I'm almost five months and I want to have a real pregnancy experience and I feel like the baby bump has a lot to do with that.

Is anyone else going through something similar? Impatience and jealousy? I almost want to unfriend her just because I feel like she's rubbing it in. Of course she's not that is ridiculous but it feels like it. She gets seven or eight months of looking pregnant and basking in it and I'm going to be lucky to get four.

 

[Quantea]

Your case is exactly the same as with a friend of mine and me, except the other way around. I'm 2 weeks ahead of her and started getting this huge bump quite early on, while my friend was still in her regular clothes. But I was actually terribly jealous of her! At the end of my 5th month, I already had trouble putting on shoes or sleeping comfortably. I only had 2 sets of pants to wear as maternity clothing is really expensive and was mostly saving up for baby stuff. I generally felt huge and clumsy and plain old fat, while my friend was still glorious and radiant in her much prettier regular clothes (even though I'd put on much less weight, it really showed on me). As you can guess, every time we get together, I flare with jealousy all over her still pretty figure and she fawns over my bump, lol.

So, I know this may not mean much to you, as it's easier to idealize what you don't have (I'm certainly very much guilty of that too), but I wanted to share my experience from the other side of the fence in case it might make you feel better. A larger bump doesn't really add as much as you'd imagine to the pregnancy experience, only makes things worse and more uncomfortable in real life (and gets old fast!). You will certainly get one soon enough, not to mention that by the end of the 9 months, you will probably have had one for too long, lol. So try and enjoy still being properly mobile and not like a walrus. The bump will come soon enough!

 

[EarthMama]

I'm totally jealous of small bumps! Mine always get huge and it's very uncomfortable at the end. My friend's bump looks so tiny even at 9 months you can barely tell she's preggo.

 

[Powell130]

I think you are looking too far into it as far as thinking shes rubbing it in. she has no control over how she carries and neither do you. Every woman and every pregnancy is different. You'll get a nice belly when it's your time and then you'll get uncomfortable, so enjoy it while you can!

 

[emma4g63]

Youve got lots of timr to get a big bump ...
I only did around 30 weeks but towards end got bigger n bigger lol

 

[SaraVO]

Thanks ladies. I do know that I'm being kinda crazy. I just really never thought that I would have this. And I feel like it's not quite real yet. My twin told me that she wasn't in maternity clothes until seven months and my stomach is changing getting firmer and you can feel the difference at least my husband says he can. I just like the idea of taking those pictures and there just isn't anything to take yet. I know she doesn't mean anything by taking the pictures every one says I'm lucky but after three miscarriages and my age this is the last time I'm going to be pregnant and knowing that just makes me want to really enjoy this time. I'm going to work on my patience I know it will happen when it's supposed to. And I'm lucky work isn't a challenge yet. I think I'll be more excited when we know a gender and I can start shopping and by all the cute baby stuff. White onesies and diapers are boring. Not to mention decorating the nursery and picking a name that my husband refuses to discuss until we know boy or girl. The waiting sucks.

 

[cosmicgirlxxx]

I still have a very small bump and am in normal clothes. I have the situation where people are constantly asking why my bump is so small etc. I like it this way and hoe it stays to a minimal size until I give birth but the constant comments from others can be a bit annoying. I'm sure your big bump will arrive soon x

 

[wannabenewmum]

If it were me , and these feelings you have about her bump make u sad I would just hide her on Facebook, ur still her friend but ur in control of what you see,
As for the feelings them self , is a bit like the grass is always greener on the other side, for all u know she hates the way she looks and would soo prefer tobe inskinny clothes.
Try to focus on the the good things that make u happy , the baby moving etc , sooner or later u will have a bump to be proud of wether it's huge or not ��x

 

[flowergirl7]

Us big bump people are jealous of the small bump people too. We love our big bumps but a lot of us get uncomfortable earlier on. We also get asked if we sure it isn't twins. My sis was small for a long time with both of her pregnancys then she popped around 25 weeks and she had a beautiful bump. She was wearing regular pants til then too. Definitely take pictures you might notice a little difference every once in a while hope you feel better about everything!

 

[laila 44]

Us big bump people are jealous of the small bump people too. We love our big bumps but a lot of us get uncomfortable earlier on. We also get asked if we sure it isn't twins. My sis was small for a long time with both of her pregnancys then she popped around 25 weeks and she had a beautiful bump. She was wearing regular pants til then too. Definitely take pictures you might notice a little difference every once in a while hope you feel better about everything!

Absolutely! I'm a small girl and I have big babies and my bumps are alway enormous! Ppl start saying things like "any day now?" When I'm only 6 months pregnant!!!! I get sooooooooo jealous of small bumps ! I'm usually very uncomfortable and can barely breathe by 32 weeks... You'll grow! Soon enough just enjoy your small best bump and flaunt how great u feel and how good u look

 

[Canadianjules]

I didn't show at all until 22 weeks, then I popped out very quickly (when I finally started gaining weight), so now have a bump. It hasn't grown much since then. I could probably still hide it to strangers with the right clothes and posture but I think I've caught up to average-ish for my build. It feels huge to me, because it came on so quickly and is squishing my organs! I'm 24wks+6d. My bump size doesn't much matter to me as only a couple of people have seen it anyways (been sick at home almost the entire pregnancy). It did worry me at first, but I've been having growth scans, and my little guy is doing fine.

Who knows, your bump may just grow more in spurts like mine and you may end up bigger than her in the end. Look at it this way, the less you grow, the less stretch marks you are likely to incur.

I totally get the envy though; the bump is one of the things you wanted to enjoy while pregnant and you haven't had that opportunity yet. I don't have that feeling about the bump per-say, but I do have it about other things. For example, I have never experienced a pregnancy craving. I'd like to experience that

 

[SaraVO]

I didn't show at all until 22 weeks, then I popped out very quickly (when I finally started gaining weight), so now have a bump. It hasn't grown much since then. I could probably still hide it to strangers with the right clothes and posture but I think I've caught up to average-ish for my build. It feels huge to me, because it came on so quickly and is squishing my organs! I'm 24wks+6d. My bump size doesn't much matter to me as only a couple of people have seen it anyways (been sick at home almost the entire pregnancy). It did worry me at first, but I've been having growth scans, and my little guy is doing fine.

Who knows, your bump may just grow more in spurts like mine and you may end up bigger than her in the end. Look at it this way, the less you grow, the less stretch marks you are likely to incur.

I totally get the envy though; the bump is one of the things you wanted to enjoy while pregnant and you haven't had that opportunity yet. I don't have that feeling about the bump per-say, but I do have it about other things. For example, I have never experienced a pregnancy craving. I'd like to experience that

I get that. I never thought about stretch marks. I am going to calm down. I talked about it with my husband and he said that he can definitely tell that my body is changing and he's noticed the whole baby glow thing and he stares at me all the time. It helps to hear that he's enjoying the way I look... he also said that the facebook friend just looks tired and swollen and I look much prettier. I think he's been reading the caveman pregnancy companion book and is taking notes on how to keep your hormonal wife happy. But either way I feel pretty dang good about it today. It's funny how a few sentences from him can change my perspective??

As for pregnancy cravings they are so damn intense and feel like everything must stop until I can eat an apple or get cheesecake and sometimes it's everything you always thought you wanted and sometimes it makes you so angry for eating it because it wasn't satisfying at all!! I don't mind it though even though. I feel very bad romantic comedy movie pregnant when a craving comes on.

 

[Canadianjules]

I'm glad you are feeling good about it today! I think a couple words from our partners can make all the difference. They know us the best, so they know how to make us feel better and also we want to know they are excited about all the changes My husband is away for a month, so when he comes back I'll be a lot changed and I hope he likes it!

Funny, I guess the whole reason I want to have a pregnancy craving is because it is in all the movies and sitcoms It sucks though that sometimes they are deeply unsatisfying; I always imagined it would always feel so good to eat. A case of the grass is greener on the other side!

 

[Al Syr]

With my first 2 pregnancies I had really big bumps. This time around my bump is quite smaller than it was at 22 weeks with my last 2 pregnancies and I am quite happy. You will show in time, enjoy that you can still move around

 

[Left wonderin]

I know exactly how you feel I had zero bump till around 23/25 weeks wondered where the hell baby actually was !!! When it showed it grew steadily !!! Enjoy for now s soon you will be huge

 

[Spiffynoodles]

I have a very small torso, so baby has nowhere to go but out, and it sucks! I had to tell everyone I was pregnant at 9 weeks this time, and most people had already guessed by then. I SO wanted to keep this pregnancy a secret until much longer. (Heck, I'd have waited until 20+ weeks if I could). So like others have said, the grass is always greener on the other side.

That being said, it's perfectly normal to feel the way you do. We all want what we don't have to some extent.

 

[StephtheHiker]

The stretch marks are like I was locked in a room holding a can of tuna with a dozen starving, angry cats. I'm small but my belly got massive and I'll always have the reminder when I look in the mirror! Sigh.

 

[Tripledagger3]

I hear you. I have a friend who is honestly the cutest pregnant person I've ever seen and it makes me a bit jealous sometimes. She's very cute and petite, and at 5 months along she basically just looks like she swallowed a little basket ball. Me, im only 14 weeks and have no bump, yet my face, ass and everything else has gotten fatter haha... and what's worse is I have a retroverted uterus so I probably won't even start showing til the third tri. I think it's ok to be a bit jealous. When I feel like that, i just remind myself that the most important thing to focus on is the health of my baby

 

[SaraVO]

I hear you. I have a friend who is honestly the cutest pregnant person I've ever seen and it makes me a bit jealous sometimes. She's very cute and petite, and at 5 months along she basically just looks like she swallowed a little basket ball. Me, im only 14 weeks and have no bump, yet my face, ass and everything else has gotten fatter haha... and what's worse is I have a retroverted uterus so I probably won't even start showing til the third tri. I think it's ok to be a bit jealous. When I feel like that, i just remind myself that the most important thing to focus on is the health of my baby

Thanks. And btw she is a week behind me. But this is her second so it makes sense she would pop sooner. I was just having one of those hormonal everything makes me mad kinda days. But she has already gained twenty pounds and I am glad that it isn't looking like I'm going to gain a whole lot of weight. It means I might get to have my natural birth especially if I keep up all of my better than I have ever been in my life habits. Seriously I didn't know I could be this committed to eating right, getting my exercise in and sleeping the way I should. They say all you need is the right motivation so apparently all I needed was a baby in the belly to start making myself a real priority. My husband has somehow magically become the guy that says the most perfect things whenever I need to hear them. I just know he has flashcards hiding somewhere but I don't care. I am excited for the gender on Wednesday! I'm starting to like being pregnant I'm enjoying being waited on for the first time in five years with my husband. I have nursery furniture that he will put together just as soon as my superstitions allow. Work is going well and my boss is super supportive. And I had to unbutton my jeans driving home from the grocery store today because they were digging in!!!

 

[mrs_sasquatch]

I was like that early on. A friend was due two weeks before me...but she ended up gaining over 70 lbs before her baby we born. My little one is still baking and I've only gained 21 lbs. Now, I'm grateful.