I want to give up...

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - Second Trimester' started by Kaileymonster, Jan 23, 2011.

  1. Kaileymonster

    Kaileymonster Mammy and bump

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    I'm having a bad couple of weeks... I've posted a few threads and I bet everyone thinks I'm a moaner... :blush:

    I want my baby more than the world... but I'm seriously doubting my parenting skills... I haven't stopped smoking [which is starting to get to me] All I keep thinking about is how wrecked my body is going to be... I'm more Annoyed at OH not giving me attention..

    This pregnancy is not going how I expected... after my history of MC's I thaught I'd atleast be happy..

    But I just want this pregnancy over and have the baby here, then my job is done... OH's family make me feel like I'm only here to make another grandchild...

    Part of me wants OH to have full custody so I can just run away... :cry:

    I couldn't do that to the LO I love so much already...

    what is wrong with me????

    SORRY FOR THE RANT!!
     
  2. Emmy1987

    Emmy1987 Mummy to a princess!

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    :hugs:

    I want my pregnancy done now, I'm fed up. Obviously I want Nugget full term and healthy but now please!

    X
     
  3. Sydneymum2b

    Sydneymum2b Well-Known Member

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    You sound really down and that's not good for you or your baby. Perhaps you should speak to your doctor and get a referral to a therapist? There's no shame in doing that and it might be good for you to have someone who is not a family member or your husband or one of your friends, to listen to you and give you advice on ways to feel more positive. This is something you need to get on top of before bubs comes. Good luck
     
  4. SAglas

    SAglas Well-Known Member

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    So sorry to hear you are feeling so down. I think you should have a word with your midwife. You mention that you have had previous miscarraiges, you will naturally be very anxious, you are upset about your partner not giving you enough attention, maybe he is scared too. Please please speak to either your doctor or midwife.

    Good luck
     
  5. Kaileymonster

    Kaileymonster Mammy and bump

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    I've spoken to them both recently.. I know this isn't "Normal". The Dr. wants to put me on anti depressants that won't harm the baby throughout my pregnancy... hopefully they help... just can't help seeing my mood changing :/

    Thank You All xxx
     
  6. Berniep

    Berniep Well-Known Member

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    Our hormones r all over the place so its perfectly normal for some of us to feel more down than others, I have a history of pnd and have been advised by my consultant to have a assessment for ante-natel depression even if the think i'm fine now apparently it will get me into the system ready for when baby comes so i can have support just in case pnd returns. I've been told to ask my gp to refer me to the leeds mental health team, maybe its worth talking to ur gp xxx
     
  7. Lauraaraa

    Lauraaraa Love My Baby Girl

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    i want to fast forward!! want baby to be in there growing as long as possible but want her to be hereeeeee all healthy and big!

    i sometimes get these thoughts of panic and think omg i am going to be a rubbish mother!!!then other times i am ok!

    your hormones are th cause of this!

    my bf is being fine lately, he actually made me realise i do moan at him so much, like everyday and last week i turned into a mega bitch! i was convinced i had to leave him and didnt know why i thought this.

    but he still put up with me, and rang me to make sure i was ok.

    and been complimenting me which helps esp when i feel like a whale most days!!

    but try not to get to down

    enjoy th pregnancy best u can, when i get down i remember how sad i was when i m/c'd my first baby. and how happy i was when i found out i was preg

    but i think its normal to have good and bad days when pregnant.

    you will be fine

    keep smilinggg
     
  8. Kaileymonster

    Kaileymonster Mammy and bump

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    Been with LMHT for years... Take It My £40ph Therapist ISN'T working :cry:
     
  9. pandabub

    pandabub Well-Known Member

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    My heart goes out to you sweets. It is normal to be scared, have moments of self-doubt, anxiety....and to just want baby here now (obviously safe and healthy)! If these feelings become persistent and overwhelming, it would definitely be worth having a word with your midwife/GP and perhaps they can set you up with some counselling?

    You will be okay. You will be a fantastic mama. Pregnancy is a stressful time so please do not apologize for your feelings. *hugs*
     
  10. BexyD

    BexyD Well-Known Member

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    Awww Hun!!! I've had m/c too and I find it really hard to enjoy pregnancy with the thought of that nevermind all the sickness, aches & pains crap we have to go though on top :(

    I really do think hormones play a part, but I also think our expectation of pregnancy being all wonderful, blooming and happiest time of our lives is actually not reality for most women.

    O can understand not wanting to take anything. And not read all replies properly - have you spoken to OH, mum or friends who have kids? I think you might find that these feelings are pretty common just no one dares to say it.

    I'd have a chat with the above and if you still don't feel better, speak to your mw and doc again x I'm sure there are other options than drugs xx
     
  11. Tracy81

    Tracy81 Well-Known Member

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    I agree with the others and talking to someone would probably help. Can you arrange to see a counsellor through your GP or midwife?

    In th meantime, keep posting on here if you need people to talk to. I have suffered from depression in the past and in my case I found that sometimes I really needed to talk to someone NOW! If you do want someone to listen I'm happy to listen to any moans. Take care hun x x x
     
  12. Kaileymonster

    Kaileymonster Mammy and bump

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    I've been in counselling all my life... [long story]

    :/
     
  13. Tracy81

    Tracy81 Well-Known Member

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    I can understand that. I was in and out of counselling when I was younger. I then stumbled across a psychotherapist who cost £40 a session. It was an expensive time but worth it in the long run. I'm not sure if you can get therapy like that on the NHS but I know they can give you CBT type therapies.

    If you really do feel desperate then probably the anti-depressants would be your only option in the short term. Just make sure you get off them and deal with the problems when you can. I honestly thought if be depressed for my entire life but it is amazing how much the therapy helped. I wish I could help you more as I know exactly how that feeling of hopelessness can destroy you.

    Big hugs. X x x
     
  14. mummy2lola

    mummy2lola Mum to 2 trying for 3

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    Hun slot of it is to do with ur hormones but ur not alone wanting the pregnancy part finished already.I had a mc on 04/10/10 and caught this wriggler on 16/10/10 so have been a paranoid wreck from the start.I thought if I got past 12wks I'd calm down but I've only gotten worse,my life revolves around panic and just wanting it to be time to hold my happy healthy baby screaming in my arms.my bff always says "I loved every bit of my pregnancy" and I just wanna bite her head off,it's not that I hate my baby being inside me coz I don't but I hate not being in control and can't get a grip of the fact that I can't protect my baby until their actually here.someone said to me the other day," u need to start enjoying this as when babies here ur gonna regret not enjoying it more" I tell u now they wish they hadn't said that lol xx
     
  15. Cajadaem

    Cajadaem Well-Known Member

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  16. Kaileymonster

    Kaileymonster Mammy and bump

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    I love my baby more than anything... I just feel like a death trap... Feels like my babies going to be safer in my arms not in my tummy... I want it here. NOW. I'm enjoying the fact i'm going to become a mum but i'm not interested in the pregnancy to be honest... it's something i've gotta do to get my baby here.

    Just makes me feel terrible.. It feels like I don't care about my baby growing. I do I'm just more interested in getting it here...
     
  17. mummy2lola

    mummy2lola Mum to 2 trying for 3

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    Honestly babe I'm exactly the same and I hate when people tell me it's the most amazing thing in the world,yes I know it is but I need this baby in my arms before I can enjoy any of it.ur not a bad person for feeling like this,infact I see it as I'm such a caring mum already that I want this bit where I can't control anything of my babies safety over so I can protect and love my baby when their safely in my arms...ur not alone my sweet xx
     
  18. Kaileymonster

    Kaileymonster Mammy and bump

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    Thanks!! Cheered me up a bit!! xx
     
  19. qpaulina42

    qpaulina42 Well-Known Member

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    I've actually been going off my anti-depressants and am also having a hard time. I feel quite nutty at times, frustrated, listless, then annoyed. An emotional mess for sure. Antidepressants might really help you out and may even help you quit smoking, who knows. Give them a chance.
     
  20. Kaileymonster

    Kaileymonster Mammy and bump

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    I stopped taking them at about 12 weeks, having been on them a while.. just feel all over the place at the moment. Don't even know how I feel sometimes I just don't feel normal!
     

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