if one more person says...

[Angelbaby_01]

I like this thread

Yesterday someone said to me "you will be suffering in the summer" because it will be summer when I am in 3rd tri. I had my daughter in summer and it was okay. I loved my belly!

When people asking me do we know the gender and what are we hoping for. Seriously, we are happy with either, just want a healthy baby and then they would look dumbstruck when I say it.

Also comments on how we should give birth and bf or ff. None of your business! Thank you!

 

[Eidson23]

Oh one of my favorites, as a lesbian couple of course is "who's the dad?"

WHAT? There is no dad, that's kind of the point! And our donor is none of your business! As the nonbiological mom for this baby, the ignorant questions never end they don't realize it's hurtful.

 

[MrsKChicago]

We got our first totally unsolicited pushy advice. DH's boss is almost like a mother figure to him, so I kind of expected some opinions from her. He said yesterday that she's adamant that we shouldn't find out the sex. She said it's a great surprise, and supposedly labor tends to be faster and easier if you don't know (I guess the suspense just pushes them out faster?). Thankfully DH knows that finding out the sex is non-negotiable. It's probably the only pregnancy thing where I'm not even willing to consider conflicting opinions.

 

[brittany12]

Oh one of my favorites, as a lesbian couple of course is "who's the dad?"

WHAT? There is no dad, that's kind of the point! And our donor is none of your business! As the nonbiological mom for this baby, the ignorant questions never end they don't realize it's hurtful.

I bet that is hurtful! And they should already know that you wouldn't be releasing the name of the donor. That isn't important in anyway! this is ya'lls baby!

We got our first totally unsolicited pushy advice. DH's boss is almost like a mother figure to him, so I kind of expected some opinions from her. He said yesterday that she's adamant that we shouldn't find out the sex. She said it's a great surprise, and supposedly labor tends to be faster and easier if you don't know (I guess the suspense just pushes them out faster?). Thankfully DH knows that finding out the sex is non-negotiable. It's probably the only pregnancy thing where I'm not even willing to consider conflicting opinions.

ughh this too! I hate when people try to convince me to not find out because "its the best experience". Um.. 1) waiting until after birth to find out is stressful for me.. I'm a planner and not having everything ready (including gender specific clothing and room) will turn me into a hot mess. its not for me and 2) its MY child and will be just as AMAZING finding out before birth as after birth

I like this thread

Yesterday someone said to me "you will be suffering in the summer" because it will be summer when I am in 3rd tri. I had my daughter in summer and it was okay. I loved my belly!

When people asking me do we know the gender and what are we hoping for. Seriously, we are happy with either, just want a healthy baby and then they would look dumbstruck when I say it.

Also comments on how we should give birth and bf or ff. None of your business! Thank you!

the first thing my mom said to me which really ticked me off and I think she realized it did was "you better not be doing that stupid breast feeding" UM.. its NOT STUPID!! Its wayyyyy cheaper than buying formula! Its MY CHILD! I don't care if you think it takes away from other people being able to feed my baby. I'm 99% sure i'll be pumping as well to stock up so that if anyone needs to watch my baby while I'm not there to feed him or her there will be a supply with bottles. If my child ends up liking the bottles better than that is ok too, but I will still be pumping so that he or she is getting MY milk!

needless to say she hasn't brought that up again!

 

[MrsKChicago]

Oh one of my favorites, as a lesbian couple of course is "who's the dad?"

WHAT? There is no dad, that's kind of the point! And our donor is none of your business! As the nonbiological mom for this baby, the ignorant questions never end they don't realize it's hurtful.

Some curiosity is to be expected if it's a new thing for them, and I'm all for education, but there are right and wrong ways to ask, and it's not an excuse to be nosy. Sounds frustrating!

 

[Eidson23]

Some curiosity is to be expected if it's a new thing for them, and I'm all for education, but there are right and wrong ways to ask, and it's not an excuse to be nosy. Sounds frustrating!

Oh, I embrace curiosity and education, especially when it comes to this because I feel like a lot of hate towards the lgbt community is due to ignorance and the "unknown". The guys I work with have genuinely asked how we did it, because they're genuinely curious about it and how it "works" I guess, and I have no problem explaining. But like you said, there is a right way and wrong way...and a lot of people ask the wrong way.

 

[MrsKChicago]

I'd be tempted to make up some fun stories.

"So, who's the father?" "Brad Pitt." "What do you mean, father? We had sex and she got pregnant." "It's actually a verrrrry small robot."

 

[Eidson23]

I'd be tempted to make up some fun stories.

"So, who's the father?" "Brad Pitt." "What do you mean, father? We had sex and she got pregnant."

I totally do have fun with it sometimes. They're like "how'd it happen?!" all wide eyed and curious and I reply with "I knocked her up, how else?" it's even funnier because I'm just so feminine, it makes them wonder for a bit

 

[Perplexed]

When people talk like that all I hear is, "I've had babies and you haven't so by default I know more than you and if you do any wrong thing I'll never let it pass"

My previous pregnancy in either late 2nd tri or early 3rd tri I started suffering this excruciating rib pain in my left rib. It was probably just my baby's position, it eased up completely by around 34 weeks when she dropped down lower. But before that, it was all day every day and there was no relief. Until I realized that if I lay on my back for a minute or two, it goes away for a few minutes. So once at my gran's I was on my back on the couch and as soon as one of my aunts saw me she went crazy and started screaming that it's dangerous and that it causes the umbilical cord to wrap against the baby's neck and that it will shatter my tailbone. She then turned to my mom for confirmation and my mom just shrugged that she hadn't heard any of this.

Also in my previous pregnancy I suffered extreme itchiness on my breasts and it kept me up many nights. I've used all the creams that ladies used and nothing used. I once made the mistake of mentioning it in front of her and she started saying how she had this cream during all of her pregnancies and it was the best, palmers. I said I already used a whole tube of palmers and it did nothing. She said palmers don't have tubes they only have bottles, you are probably confused, I'll get you one. this comment pissed me off to no end! Does being pregnant mean I can't read too and people have to read product containers for me?? later on my ob referred me to a dermatologist who prescribed me something.

I was really annoyed with her and her comments throughout my pregnancy. she at some point realized I wasn't interested in her advice so she gave me a mention at post on instagram with a story about saving all advice you receive till you need it. Maybe my hormones just made me super annoyed by her!