If you knew then what you know now...

[Lirpa11]

Would you do it any earlier? Are you happy with your TTC journey?

If I knew a few years ago how hard this can be I would have started tying for a baby just under two years ago, right after we got married. I would have stopped the pill before we got married.

I know we are still young, and we have only been trying for 6 months (AF due today or tomorrow), nearly onto cycle/month 7.

If you knew more about the journey would you have done anything different?

I would have stopped the pill a few months before the wedding, and started TTC about 3-4 months after the wedding. We have now been married for 2 years and 4 months.

 

[Marqelle93]

If I knew I wouldn't have a period for 2 years after stopping the pill I would have stopped when I was 17 (we started trying at 19). If I had known that there was such a thing as clomid I would have started almost 2 years ago. If I'd have known my family physician couldn't help with my fertility I wouldn't have let hi charge me for thousands of dollars worth of pointless tests, yes, I guess you could say I would do it differently haha

 

[Lirpa11]

Goodness I'm sorry. It has been pretty hard for you.

I guess with me, I just thought after the load of info you get taught about not becoming pregnant, it just happened so easily! How naive I was and I'm only a quarter of the way to how long you have been trying.

Good luck x

 

[Marqelle93]

I agree. My parents and health teacher make it sound like you could sneeze and get pregnant. No one mentions the fertility drugs and blood tests.

I've been tryin for 2 years and 2 months. How about you?

 

[Ambree]

Would you do it any earlier? Are you happy with your TTC journey?

If I knew a few years ago how hard this can be I would have started tying for a baby just under two years ago, right after we got married. I would have stopped the pill before we got married.

I know we are still young, and we have only been trying for 6 months (AF due today or tomorrow), nearly onto cycle/month 7.

If you knew more about the journey would you have done anything different?

No not really. The beginning of TTC was a matter of meeting the right person. My first obstacle was me and my outlook
Perhaps I would change how I managed my periods/pill; I dont have any neg effects (that I know of). But now that I know about cycles and charting, there was no need for me to take the pill.

 

[KayeChay]

Would you do it any earlier? Are you happy with your TTC journey?

If I knew a few years ago how hard this can be I would have started tying for a baby just under two years ago, right after we got married. I would have stopped the pill before we got married.

I know we are still young, and we have only been trying for 6 months (AF due today or tomorrow), nearly onto cycle/month 7.

If you knew more about the journey would you have done anything different?

I would have stopped the pill a few months before the wedding, and started TTC about 3-4 months after the wedding. We have now been married for 2 years and 4 months.

Back then parents and teachers made it out like it was easy to get pregnant. And one of my best friends got pregnant at 17 so I thought "I need to be careful, I don't want to get pregnant in high school or anytime soon (not that I was sexually active at the time)"
but through out my school years I never had a period (only the first time) and my mom would ask about it and I would be too embarrassed to talk about those kind of things so I just walked off now I wish I could have talked to my mom about it and go to the doctors. Also, wished I took care of my body better with vitamins and better eating habits...

Anyways,there are still girls out there that makes it look like its a cinch to get pregnant and here I am I would give my right arm to have a baby

Kaye

 

[MissN8]

I wish I could see into the future then I would know whether to come off bcp slightly early to get my periods regular and ovulate but am scared I will fall straight away but likelihood I wouldn't as have endo and had 3 laps already but OH isn't ready until December

 

[StrongerDust]

I think it's very difficult to say if you should of started TTC earlier than you did, because some people can get pregnant the first time they have sex without using anything and others take a while. Until you start TTC, you don't really know how fast you are at getting pregnant. I thought I'd be quick, but I've been TTC for 18 months.

 

[Mel2014]

It is hard. I would of starting ttc when I was younger. I wanted everything in place first before ttc but you can never be 100 percent prepared or ready so I have been told.

 

[Lirpa11]

Very good point strongerdust. There is no point in trying before you were ready or that's when it would happen straight away!!

And I completely agree KayeChay. I think my periods were kind of all over the show when I was younger, and the doc told my mom then to put me on the pill but she refused as that was an open ticket to be promiscuous in her eyes and was for sexually active people...

I wish I knew more about this FAM contraceptive. I would hae started using that much earlier on! It is a way to prevent pregnancy as much as a way to get pregnant (although it seems difficult for me right now!)

 

[Tricia08]

If I had known then what I know now then yes I would have started trying sooner. DH and I have been married for 6 years I would have started at least 2 years ago.

 

[Onions]

I would have been far more forceful with the Drs, instead of just blindly following what they said. I'm not sure I would have started earlier, probably because if I had known more I wouldn't have just gone on the pill when they told me that was the best way to conceive later on. What a load of rubbish, it didn't even regulate me!

 

[bromandapanda]

Hey there! I am still smacking myself for telling people we're ttc in the first place. I only told my two best friends but it's been awful. One of them got pregnant and I didn't know she and her husband were ttcing....so I felt like a fricken idiot that I told her our personal information. The other friend just looks at me all sorrowful like "Oh, it probably hasn't happened yet. Don't say anything!"

Ug, yeah. So I wouldn't recommend telling anyone.

 

[Lirpa11]

Hey there! I am still smacking myself for telling people we're ttc in the first place. I only told my two best friends but it's been awful. One of them got pregnant and I didn't know she and her husband were ttcing....so I felt like a fricken idiot that I told her our personal information. The other friend just looks at me all sorrowful like "Oh, it probably hasn't happened yet. Don't say anything!"

Ug, yeah. So I wouldn't recommend telling anyone.

how long have you been trying?

We are currently caught in cycle 6 (no ovulatoin/no af/waiting is killing me - should be in cycle 7 with a week and half from ovulation by now). I didnt wanna tell anyone at first as I thought after a couple months we could announce some happy news. Now after over half a year I don't really care who knows. If they ask I say yea been trying but nothing has happened and just smile. So many people out there have problems and don't want to speak about it which makes it awkwrd to talk to anyone or ask about their journey.

I know what you mean about speaking to close friends about it too. I spoke to one friend and said we would start trying soon, she said they would try maybe next year. A month later she told me she was 9 weeks... so she knew then she was pregnant and didn't even speak to me or share that they were trying or nothing. That kinda hurt but yea.

Another friend I secretly told I was ready and DH wasn't ready at the time (before we started ttc). her DF had been asking her to TTC and she wasn't ready so she would say hurtful things like I should just go to her DF and she could have mine so people got what they wanted. like wtf? I dont know where in the heck that came from but I didn't like it at all.

*sigh*

still waiitng!

 

[tuesdaysbaby]

Yes. I would have started trying immediately after getting married. We are married four years next week and it feels like an age. I am the last one left of my friends who got married at the same time.

My friend and I shared all our TTC plans, and she knew we were trying. She hadn't plan to till the next month. Then she told me that she got pregnant first go, not even trying, just not preventing. I haven't spoken to her for 5 or so weeks now. I just can't do it. Whenever I think about her, I think about her getting all that I want. Selfish, meh, I don't care at this point.

She doesn't even like kids and harped on for years and years about never wanting any, not even one.

That makes me feel awesome!

We always wanted so many kids, 4 or 5. Now I'm 27 and I officially will be 28 + by the time we get ONE. I am a January birthday so won't get one before next birthday that's for sure. I am really upset by that. I am probably looking at having a lot less children now.

We have only been trying for 4 cycles and I think I'm so upset because AF just arrived.

 

[KayeChay]

Hey there! I am still smacking myself for telling people we're ttc in the first place. I only told my two best friends but it's been awful. One of them got pregnant and I didn't know she and her husband were ttcing....so I felt like a fricken idiot that I told her our personal information. The other friend just looks at me all sorrowful like "Oh, it probably hasn't happened yet. Don't say anything!"

Ug, yeah. So I wouldn't recommend telling anyone.

Yeah, I first I told a few people DH and I want to have a baby but it's like all the people I told is getting pregnant I'm like WTH?! So now I just tell people we are going to start trying when we move to Hawaii (DH is getting stationed there), which is in January but secretly we are trying right now.
I'm kind of tired of these "sorry" looks people gives me..

Kaye

 

[messica]

What I wished we did differently:

- I wouldn't have ever taken clomid (it thins many women's lining down to near nothing making implantation impossible and has terrible side effects - femara is so much better and imo should be the standard)

- With hindsight being 20/20 I wouldn't have ever wasted my time and money on IUI's


What I'm glad we got lucky on and ended up doing right:

- Was already anti artificial birth control and was well schooled in natural family planning (Billings Ovulation Method). Charting on Fertility Friend was a breeze for that reason and my body was long since ready to go.

- Fell into the hands of a good and ethical doctor first. I thought all were created equal, but after reading assisted reproductive board here I quickly learned most regular MD's have no clue what they're doing and will gladly take your money indefinitely while getting you nowhere. They can't properly interpret tests, diagnose or treat infertility.

- Trying sooner, or longer, will get you nowhere if there's a problem that will prevent you from ever having a baby. I'm glad we didn't wait to get TESTED. Pre-conception exams are imperative.

- Along with that, our first doc insisted on looking at both sides of the coin right off the bat. A sperm analysis is one of the least expensive tests and the odds of that being your problem are 50/50. We were able to immediately sort out that that was our issue instead of continuing to suffer for years with no answers.

- During our med use and IUI's doc insisted on monitoring. I don't think it's EVER a good idea to utilize fertility meds or treatments without it. In fact, I'd go so far as to declare it dangerous and irresponsible.

- When doc couldn't do any more for us we moved onto an RE, and it was the best thing we could have done based on what we were dealing with. Yes, God could have blessed us regardless of our less than 2% odds, but I truly believe we were meant to take the IVF journey to get there and I have no regrets. I'm glad we were proactive, and think God and science working together are the only reason we are where we are today

 

[Moet]

I would have stopped birth control when we got engaged (1.5 years before wedding) , since my cycles have been long and irregular since stopping 6 months ago. I don't regret telling anyone we're trying, but its only been 3 months of trying, So I think if it takes over 6 minths I may regret mentioning it due to people noticing its taking a while and maybe asking questions. My SIL got pregnant 1st cycle trying, lucky girl.

 

[Moet]

I would have stopped birth control when we got engaged (1.5 years before wedding) , since my cycles have been long and irregular since stopping 6 months ago. I don't regret telling anyone we're trying, but its only been 3 months of trying, So I think if it takes over 6 minths I may regret mentioning it due to people noticing its taking a while and maybe asking questions. My SIL got pregnant 1st cycle trying, lucky girl.

 

[ElleT613]

I haven't been on here in forever...this thread caught my eye!

Hindsight's 20/20 right?! Oh gosh, if I knew then what I knew now-- I guess I wish I wouldn't have been so naive about TTC and just life's path in general. I can say my life had been pretty smooth sailing... a great husband, solid jobs, awesome families--- of course I thought starting a family would be a piece of cake and I would have my baby in a baby GAP onesie in no time. My journey is nothing to brag about. After being married for 3 years I started TTC just before my 27th birthday. Here we are over two years later with no baby in our arms-- but two that we lost in the first trimester that I hope to someday meet in heaven. I maxed out my lifetime of clomid cycles, Had three IUI's and a failed IVF. The worst part? No diagnoses. We are both "perfect" in the fertility sense.

Other than that I would say to drink more and worry less during my TTC journey. If it's going to happen a drunk night isn't going to prevent implantation. It will happen when it's meant to...

And one last thing...there is light at the end of the tunnel....We are moving on from infertility to domestic newborn adoption!

Baby Dust to all of you.